Actual line of code I just wrote:
(list ‘list? list?)
No wonder people think this is voodoo.
tbh after 5 years of not writing lisp I also think this is voodoo
my laptop when I wfh
this is my favorite thing on the internet this week
my brain when I’m working: it’s really important that we look up what that one singer from that one musical is up to right now
the internet: a pleasing work environment will help you be more productive!
me: makes sense!
*spends four hours choosing a theme for my IDE, gets no work done*
recruiters be like: hey we are looking for people with experience in <x> and I think your work at <y> is relevant :)
me, who has never worked with <x>:
What are people using to create personal websites these days?
What is the weirdest thing you had to account for when building the perseverance rover?
Other people: why would you move to seattle for the weather
Me: clearly you have not experienced winter in chicago
me coming across a class that has 5000 lines of code:
hey tumblr why can we still not follow or reply from a side blog
me in school: it must be so stressful to work on things that people actually use, what if I break something
me, working on a product that people actually use: oops this is kinda broken…. eh, the fix can wait until the next release
me: ugh why did I schedule a 9:30am meeting its so early
my partner who has 7:30am meetings with his distributed team / my med school friends in the hospital at 6 / my grad school friends with 8am classes:
me in college: wow, the debugger is so powerful, I’m sure this will be super useful in the future
me at my tech job:
me: Yeah I worked with react for like 2 years
my mentee: ok so why do you do <thing> in react
teaching truly forces you to deeply understand a topic y’all this shit is hard (but also rewarding!)
me to my manager: yeah I’d be interested in learning <new programming stack>, it sounds fun
my brain to me: bitch you don’t even know your current programming stack
me before holiday pto: after many months, I finally feel like I am getting to know this codebase
me after holiday pto: have I ever seen this codebase before
some people: wow I feel so refreshed and ready to work after that long break
me: wow I could really use another
eternity two weeks off
me: spends $$$ on nice ergonomic chair and standing desk
me during work:
me: I’ll create aliases for commands I run often and save myself time!
also me: spends more time looking at .zshrc to remember what I aliased things to
Me, at least once per hour during the workday: “Am I supposed to be in a meeting right now???”
college student that I am mock interviewing: yeah so I’ve been programming for 7 years and participate in <long list of activities> and <more impressive stuff>
…As if I needed more reasons to have impostor syndrome T.T
me when I have to work in a new part of the codebase:
Therapists aren’t people who you “pay to pretend to care about you”, therapists are people you pay to teach you how to care for yourself
Me: I am violently depressed.
Therapist: Oh! Sounds like you need to do YOGA! That will help!
Me: *signs up for yoga*
Me: *is violently depressed in Downward Dog*
Me: I hate myself and only see my flaws
Therapist: ok lets refocus on things you like about yourself. This week i want you to try and journal about good things you’ve for yourself and others.
Me: *does the homework* yeah but i still hate myself but feel bad cause i shouldn’t
Therapist: feeling like you shouldn’t hate yourself is a step in the right direction. Mental health is complex and isn’t something that will ~magically~ improve. We have a lot of hard work head of us but I’ll be here to help you.
TL;DR stop perpetuating the idea that therapy is unhelpful because the results are not instantaneous.
As a psychologist the amount of bullshit on this site, the amount of fucking dangerous bullshit on this site about how therapy is neurotypical bullshit and isn’t worth it and how exercise is pointless and good diet is pointless and that therapy homework is pointless DRIVES ME UP THE FUCKING WALL
Exercise is fucking important.
good diet is fucking important
therapy is fucking important.
because pills alone don’t help. they improve the hormonal imbalance (as does exercise and good diet which ALSO are a form of very real self care as your physical being is sorta connected to your mental one but go fucking figure right?), but guess what? the suicidal thoughts, the thoughts of harm, the thoughts of hating yourself, they’re still there. suicides actually increase when medicated. why? because suddenly you have the energy to fulfill thoughts of harming yourself. which is why you NEED therapy alongside pills.
it has taken you years, or decades to create your maladaptive thought processes and behaviours. that shit doesn’t disappear overnight. core beliefs don’t change overnight. these are the very fucking core of your personhood, your being and personality. THAT TAKES TIME TO CHANGE
STOP ACTING LIKE THERAPY IS SHIT IF IT DOESNT WORK IN TWO SESSIONS
The stigma that therapy isn’t worth it if you don’t feel better after the first couple sessions is such bullshit. It took me 8 months to tell my therapist anything personal but I kept going because I wanted to get better. I thought it was bs too when she kept telling me to think about other things and to distract myself when I have intrusive thoughts (not exact words whatsoever). Now it’s 2 and a half years later and I can successfully switch from thinking about all the ways I could kill myself to the song Slippery by Migos and immediately start laughing. You need to let it help you.
not cs but Imma just put this here because a lot more people should be going to therapy tbh, esp in an industry known for stress and imposter syndrome