Women are Products
Women do the most for nothing in return because they’re products and men are taught to be the consumers. It makes sense and I’ve seen it in real life. When deciding what to wear to my first ever date, I thought about the male gaze - does the outfit give me an hourglass figure? What do I look like from behind? From every angle. Is my hair voluminous and polished yet still effortless? Is my makeup enough but also not too much?
I thought about every move I made. I even got angry at myself because I was walking faster than him and he couldn’t keep up. How should I flutter my lashes and look up so that he could later use that image in his sexual fantasies? I had to balance out innocent and submissive with flirty and independent. I had to create a persona and market myself to whatever this guy’s sexual preferences may be - whether he likes his girls to be tops or bottoms, skinny or thick, whether he prefers ass or tits. The black dress catered to a bit of everything. I would’ve even twirled for him to get a proper look at me, and thank god i didn’t. So when I asked “am I what you expected then?” and received a half assed “yeah”, I was disappointed that perhaps I still wasn’t what he wanted. Zero validation. This ugly boy that probably doesn’t even have a skincare routine could do the bare minimum for me to turn up like a show pony and try to appeal to him anyway. This is why women are products in a society of consumer culture. And in the end I’m still judged as a bitch with no personality that leads boys on and doesn’t even have an ass as big as the one in the insta post.