“If Tumblr wasn’t called Tumblr, I think it could be called Stumblr. I think the name would be quite appropriate for a place which is but a collection of thoughts and texts written by people who have all stumbled at least once in their life, and who ended up here in the hopes of finding something to hold on to.”
“How do you tell people? How do you tell them that you’re exhausted even though you slept for 10 hours? How do you tell them that you need a break from talking and smiling and simply being near them? How do you tell them that although you love them, you so desperately need to be alone tonight?”
— Midnight thoughts (I’m burnt out)
Now when I look back, I’ve liked the same flavor of ice cream since third grade. I can count that number of friends I’ve made in my entire life on my fingers and they’re still in my life. Still have the same favorite books that I read in middle school. Still love the same movies since childhood. I’ve always loved in extremes. I should have known that if I’m going to love you, it’s going to be forever. Oh how I wish I’d known this before I fell for you because there’s no unloving you now.
— I’d have looked the other way had I known
ik some people don’t understand exactly how much anxiety can irrationally prevent you from doing things, even easy things, or how much it can completely stunt your life… it’s garbage tbh and it’s not the same as being nervous, it’s not something you can necessarily just push through, you can be confident in some ways and terrified of other things for reasons that might not even make sense to you, and telling someone to “get over it” is practically a guarantee you’re making them feel even worse, so… yeah
“If you are not ready for her to call you at 3 AM freaking out, if you cannot handle her at her worst, if you only crave for her curves and not her mind, if you cannot deal with her mood swings and if you want her just for sex stay the fuck away.”
— (via bl-ossomed )
“I hate the word crush. Because if I had a crush on you, that would require you to hurt me, and you haven’t. I hate when people call what we have a crush, I don’t have a “crush” on you. I fell in love with you. I fell so much harder than an innocent crush. There’s no going back now, so I pray to God that you don’t crush me.”
the thing is, somebody cares. i know your best friend seems really busy all the time and is shit at texting but she still loves you and she talks to you more than she talks to anyone else and you’re the only breath of calm she has on this planet. the boy in your science class loves seeing what music you’re listening to on your headphones - he has the same taste and wishes he had the nerve to ask you about it. your english teacher loves the insight you have on your papers. somebody cares. the person who lives down the street from you notices when you are sick because they don’t see you stomping your way to the schoolbus - it’s how they know it’s time to get their breakfast ready. somebody is looking for you at the party, even if they don’t know they’re really looking for you - but when you don’t show up, some part of them is disappointed. somebody is looking for you in the library, in the spot where you eat lunch, in front of that one step you always seem to trip on. i know your parents are a complicated mess and there’s drama between your friends and your love life is sort of shaped like a constant question and everybody seems all caught up in their own lives and their own happiness and nobody really notices: but somebody always does. every face in your dreams is someone you have met, and that means that you are in a million’s stranger’s heads. they see you when they go to bed. and somebody cares. somebody still thinks about you even though you were just a person with a nice outfit or good eyeliner or a great smile or because you were having one of those moments that are so charmingly human in nature or because they regret not asking if you needed help when you fell or because they wonder what you were thinking about or drawing or writing or just because you’re alive, and that makes you fascinating. somebody cares. when you were on break from work and saw a dog hanging his head out of the car and suddenly broke into a smile: there was a girl in the back of that car, and I was her, and I still think about you, and i hope you get more chances to smile like that. and there is you, sitting here reading this, and by some small extension, meeting me, and i am telling you, I care. somebody always does. i promise. i promise. you are loved.
I spent a year falling back in love with myself and unintentionally stumbled across a soul who showered me in a love I’ve never experienced before. Beforehand, it was evident that I made a habit out of undermining my value and this was reflected by the decisions I made and the environments I lingered in.
However, once I acknowledged myself, and realised I was deserving of great things, my change of thought ALONE encouraged the universe to unveil beauty into my life and gift me with things I could only truly appreciate once I knew my worth. - Meggan Roxanne
“An open letter to the boy who broke his own heart loving me. I need you to know I never meant to hurt you. But we were so different I was complete and total chaos and you were serenity. I was so in love with you. It wasn’t just something I said to you every night before bed, I meant it every time those words slipped from my Lips. It was so real and so raw. Real love isn’t red roses and candle lit dinners. It’s not like the movies, not at all. It’s what we had. It’s telling each other things we never told anyone else at 3 am. Its the late night video calls, talking about anything and everything. It’s seeing each other for who we really were and accepting it. We wanted it to work so badly but you don’t always get what you want. After you left, I couldn’t deal with it. So I drowned my heart in shots of vodka and shattered my lungs from the smoke of cigarettes. There is nothing fucking poetic about the things I did to forget you. I’m sorry for all the drunk phone calls, but nothing worked. I just really fell apart, but I forgot that you were hurting too. Every time I saw you, you looked like you were doing great. I know now it was just an act, we were both acting. I forgot about your feelings after we ended, good people don’t do that to people they love. The feeling of your finger tips were still burning my skin weeks after you left. I couldn’t handle it, I couldn’t take missing you all day every day. I felt so alone. So, I let another boy touch me, kiss me, and love me. I did whatever I could to forget you. But honestly, I wanted it to but you the whole time. I wanted his blue eyes to be your green ones. And I wanted his lips to be yours. I could never say this to you, but I really do still love you. We don’t talk anymore, but I hope you think about me once in awhile. I made so many mistakes. You will never know how sorry I am, you meant so much to me. You were my first love, and you always will be.”
The girl who took your heart out of your chest and put it back in upside down
If I don’t make you happy, I want you to go. If you don’t get the biggest feeling of relief when my name comes up on your screen, I want you to go. If arguing with me and thinking about even a chance of losing me doesn’t fuck up your breathing pattern, then I want you to go. If there’s the slightest bit of doubt that I’m the one for you, I want you to fucking go. If waking up to missed calls from me because you’ve ignored me the night before doesn’t make you feel the lowest you felt, then I want you to go. If I take up too much of your time and you don’t feel like you’re doing the things you want to, then I want you to go. If the thought of my skin touching someone else’s and my voice saying another name doesn’t make you clench your teeth and fill with resentment, I want you to go. If you’ve said sorry so many times that even your subconscious knows, I want you to go. If the only time you ever say you’re in love with me is either when my clothes are off or I tell you I want to leave, I want you to go. If you can look at me in the eyes and tell me you didn’t fuck her, I want you to please go. If you’re physically capable of letting me stay up all night and wait for you while you go and do something that you know will make me feel less of myself then I want you to go.
and if you can’t love me enough to go, I get it completely.
remember to listen to yourself. if you’re exhausted and don’t have the energy to commit to plans, it’s okay to say no. if you’re feeling like total crap and just can’t motivate yourself to be productive; rest! it’s okay to say no to things you’re not up to and set limits and let yourself have a break from it all, you deserve it.