My gender is Homosexula
And they’re all Vlad
Asexula also goes by Nomosexula.
this just made my day.
Not to be straight phobic or anything, but does anyone else kinda throw up in their mouth a little bit when people ship Alcina Dimitrescu with a man?? 🤢
MY BODY FILLS WITH DISGUST
an infinite of percent yes. Me.
she’s = she is
he’s = he is
they’re = they are
you’re = in love with alcina dimitrescu
your user…. this is now YOUR post only, I don’t make the rules I just enforce them 😌
Well, aren’t we all😌
oh shiii- Dimitrescu daughters human au would be like:
p.s. I don’t own this credits to their rightful owner on twt
Daniela: I said certified freak
Cassandra: Seven days a week
y/n: Make that pull-out game weak, woo!!!
Bela, giving up, joining them unconvinced: Yeah, you fucking with some wet-ass puss-*gagged*
Daniela: fine then I’ll do it.. WET ASS PUSSSYY!! *song keeps banging as loud as it possibly can*
Alcina in the other room drinking tea, minding her own business now contemplating life choices: jesus christ
this is absolutely random but I'll ask anyway... who among the Dimitrescu ladies including the maiden of course is a natural mathematician or anything that includes smart logic?
It is a tie between Alcina and Daniela.
Maria is excellent at arithmetics and has a very thorough understanding of the exact sciences due to her years teaching, yet she doesn’t grasp abstract maths quite as easily. Bela has made it to university Calculus out of boredom but fails a bit when problem-solving requires a lot of thinking outside the box. Cassandra, though a certified badass, is also the gay who cannot do math.
Alcina, on the other hand, is both a grandmaster chess player and astute businesswoman+scientist. She has turned logic into an art and can mentally go through her entire vineyard ledger without a single miscalculation.
Daniela is a true STEM nerd beneath that dreamy bookworm exterior. Computing is one of the things that just comes super easily to her - she could have probably invented the Turing machine had she been a little bit more bored back then.
did you know?
when I say “ily”, it doesn’t mean “i love you”, it means “i love alcina”.
not everything is about you, sometimes everything is about alcina and everything is fine.
“but alcina starts with a and not with y” sometimes not everything works out your way either, and everything is fine.
I like how this implies I did something heterosexual. If so, I apologize.
Lady D and the daughters in armor?
This took me way more time than I thought, I kinda got bored and didn’t finish the rendering 😅
Daniela likes her milk
Milk is better ice cold you monster-
Milk is only good when it’s been sitting for an hour–
Please don’t drink room temperature milk-
Daniela, drink the room temperature! It’s good-
Milk is ONLY GOOD at ROOM TEMPRATURE
Unless it’s as warm as tea or freezing cold it’s disgusting
DON’T DRINK ROOM TEMPERATURE MILK
DO YOU THINK IT’S REFRIGERATED INSIDE OF A C O W, NUBBY?
I see 0 problems with drinking milk that’s been sitting on my desk for 5 hours.
I put a cooling system inside my cow’s udders >:(
If you don’t…..You just have small dick energy
Jokes on you
I already HAVE small dick energy–
Yall are insane and i love it 😎
the new one... dang it.. ARE WE GETTING PART TWO?!?!?
Someone PLEASE give Alcina Dimistrescu a cute 5'0 Latina girlfriend.
Just pls, hear me out:
- She blows reggeton throughout the castle at the worst times. I mean, do imagine that bass bouncing in that place 👌
- She will rub Vicks Vaporub on Alcina’s chest after she drinks her wine cause she knows it has blood and “Eso es malo. Te vas a enfermar.”
- Saturdays are CLEANING DAYS.
- “I DONT CARE WE HAVE A STAFF ALCINA, ITS SATURDAY!”
- *blasting salsa while dancing with the broom as she sweeps the Grand Staircase*
- Will undoubtely get jealous of Mother Miranda
- Will curse Alcina out in Spanish
- Also, we know Alcina is a cultured woman and probabbly speaks many lenguages, including Spanish. But there are SO MANY idioms in Reggeton, she has to ask every time about the lyrics
- “Dear, what is a Bicho, and why is this person Bellaca?”
- The poor latinita doesnt know whether to laugh, or scream
- Bela, Cassandra and Daniela love her cooking. Also, they love the way she pronounces their name with her little accent
- Mother Miranda is lowkey afraid of her. That is a Chola ma'am. And there aint enough mushrooms and dog men to keep you from her rage.
- “MIRA, PINCHE DESGRACIADA, HIJA DE LA GRADISIMA PUTA, MALPARIDA-”
- “Alcina, what is the meaning of this?!”
- “QUE TU TE CREES QUE ESE TOTO ES TUYO COÑISIMA DE TU MADRE!”
- Alcina literally has to carry her out of the church
- Heiseingberg is DYING laughing
- Speaking of Heiseingberg he LOVES her.
- Ya’ll fucking know that when Alcina and her fight she ends up in the Factory, drinking Rum and smoking Cuban cigars.
- She will try to set him up with one of his friends.
- Hillarity ensues. Because we all know a Latina will RUIN Karl’s life.
- She likes Donna. Although she has definately tried to sanctify Angie by dumping a bottle of Holy Water on her.
- She comissions Donna to make her a typical dress from her country
- NOVELA BINGE WATCHING WITH MOREAU
- As a consequence he learns iconic spanish comebacks
- “Moronic freak”
- “Maldita lisiada”
- “WHAT DID YOU JUST SAY TO ME!”
- Also, she WILL teach Alcina how to dance Bachata. It is EXTREMELY difficult. But enjoyable experience none the less.
- The girls fear her more than Alcina.
- No scythe can rival 🌠La Chancla🌠
- You bet she will introduce Alcina to Pablo Neruda and other amazing Latin Literally Geniuses like Gabriel Garcia Marquez
- Alcina reads “A Hundred Years of Solitude” and is confused ALL THE TIME.
- “Im afraid I am confused. Is that the father, or the son?”
- “Thats the uncle”
- “Theres an uncle?”
We n e e d to teach the girls how to dance salsa, imagine dancing to Aguanile with them—
Also Alcina going all “sana sana colita de rana si no sana hoy sanará mañana” with the girls?? A blessing.
We’re making a quinceañera party for Daniela, because I said so and she deserves it. And then we’ll shove her face into the cake.
Echarle la bendición a las nenas everytime they go hunting, just because we care.
Café con leche and a little kiss on the cheek for my man Moreau.
Heisenberg listens to Gloria Trevi, no, you can’t change my mind.
*angie shows up* “Anulo cualquier maldición o embrujo que se me haya hecho a través de esta tREINTAHIJUEP– en nombre de Dios todopoderoso”
Explain what bichota means in the middle of a meeting with Mother Miranda, go on.
SEULRENE TEASER PHOTOS