This should be reblogged by everyone. Even if you’re straight, you should be a supporter.
fun fact; your girl is ace ~katie
Today i burned 888 kcal ^^, i ate a little bit more than yesterday, but it’s okay, I’m doing fine i guess (if next Monday i don’t see a different number on the scale, i’m gonna lose my shit :D)
Omg i don’t know how but i have been 2 days without eating any sugar, and yesterday i burned 922kcal, amazing 🤌🏻🤌🏻
I had a whole meal bc i was feeling very dizzy :)
I did great yesterday, i went down 1’4 kg, but this morning I’m feeling without energy, super tired, everything hurts and and I have nausea. All this for not eating almost anything, so instead of skipping breakfast like every day, I have eaten an apple. My father has prepared me an egg and hot dog sandwich (in Spain we call it frankfurt, I don’t know if it will be the same), and I will most likely eat it because I am completely without energy.
I’m angry af.
Every day I eat well, I finish the plate and what they put me (because I was in recovery), but today I was not hungry (+ I have started again with my weight loss journy) and for lunch I had pumpkin puree with pieces of bread, but the problem is that the pieces of bread are disgusting, and also I was not hungry, so I was not going to eat them. My mother has gone crazy yelling at me and telling me a lot of things about me and my eating habits (when she only sees me eat 2 times a day) and so on. And in the end I ended up eating 5 small pieces of bread.
It has been horrible. I hate them. I need to start the 2021 course to be able to leave home, I can’t take it anymore.
But well, I guess i’ll just suck it up.
my new roommate said that her last roommate had an eating disorder and then talked to me about her clean eating and weight loss goals and how she buys clothes that are a little snug to motivate her to lose more
and like honestly? i have anorexia but this is why i constantly talk about the dangers of the “health and fitness” industry and diet culture bc we have essentially normalized certain symptoms of disordered eating but it’s ok if it’s under the guise of health i guess???
like how is calling it “clean” eating NOT a way to moralize food
how is intermittent fasting NOT the same thing as skipping meals
how come when i buy clothes that don’t fit, it’s something i have to tell my therapist about because it means i am putting pressure on myself to fit into them, but if a “normal” person does it then it’s just motivation for them?
where is the fucking line???
and more importantly when are we going to start acknowledging that the entire world is pro-ana but that’s too harsh of a description so we slap some health buzzwords on it to make it palatable
when are we going to take responsibility for encouraging disordered behavior instead of labeling those of us with EDs as the crazy/imbalanced ones
your fucking Whole30 or keto or whatever “clean” diet you’re on is just as restrictive as the diets we create for ourselves due to our disorders. but we are the crazy ones, right
“…the entire world is pro-ana…”
i couldve fucking made it by now. i could be at my ugw, thin and beautiful. but i cant stop eating and i fucking hate myself more and more for it everyday.
I just weighed myself bc i wanted to know after my “recovery” attempt if I gained weight, and bruh, i gained 1’4kg i’m gonna fcking die :’)
A random Youtube girl just motivated me, omg thank you youtube girl i love you. I’m gonna start taking pictures of my weight, starting tomorrow monday :))).
Skinnies i need to tell you something.
I started smocking in 2019, but I quit that same year, but the problem is that I’m having a huge urge to smoke again, and believe me when I tell you that I’m going to do it again. When? Well I suppose that when I save and have time to go to buy tobacc0 (which by the way I do not know whether to switch to the electronic cigarette or continue with box cigarettes).
Well so, I needed to tell someone, and that’s it :) thanks for listening to me skinnies ^^
I’m gonna explain you where i have been, bc yeah I disappeared from Tumblr a long time ago.
Basically, in short, it has been a “recovery” attempt. But here I am again, back at the game.
But this time i’m gonna put goals. I need to lose at least 2kg before the 14th of this month. Why the 14th? Bc that day I get the new clothes that I have bought and I want to look even a little thinner with them.
So the new daily updates are back and no, this time I’m not going to do it the healthy way hee hee:))
I didn’t have dinner and I didn’t have breakfast today, so we good.
Okay, i tried the healthy way and no.
I don’t care anymore about my hair, WE GOING THE UNHEALTHY WAY BBYS.
(Currently image of how my brain is working rn)⬇️
Imagine it now:
In just a few months you’ve completely transformed yourself. You’re skinny and there’s no question about it. You’re even now the skinniest friend in the group. None of your clothes fit bc now everything is enormous on you. You FINALLY get to shop in all the stores where you could barely fit into their clothes before. Not only do they now fit, but they LOOK GOOD. Your tummy is flat. You don’t need to suck in. Your waist is small. You can wear all the crop tops you want. Your arms are tiny. Your hands and fingers and wrists are dainty. You wear hand jewelry and it looks AMAZING. Your jawline is snatched. Your chest is perkier. Your legs are smaller and your thighs barely touch. You wear heels and they ACTUALLY make your legs look hot!!! You’re become so pretty you get so much good attention from everyone. People look at you and they either want you or they envy you. You get invited to parties. You get invited to go out. You’re no longer asked to be the one to take the pictures, you are FRONT and CENTER in them.
What’s stopping you from this being YOUR reality in just some months???
All you have to do is commit to that reality and it’ll all be yours.
Don’t give up now.
Bruh when i read this i always got lots of motivation. So from now on, i’m gonna fucking change. I know i sad this HUNDREDS of times, but, who hasn’t? I’M GONNA DO IT, I’M GONNA CHANGE!!!!
I know I disappeared for a while, I was hospitalised bc of a medication that i took that made a reaction on my body and i got very ill.
I can exercise already but bruh i’m just too lazy rn.
I’m gonna start starving more, i mean, cutting more calories bc i’m not doing ANY EXERCISE at all.
And btw, i know that if this year i don’t lose weight it’s not going to be a problem, because next year i’m gonna move out and live with my grandparents, which means that i can skip as much meals as i want :3
In fact this years is very hard for me to lose weight because i live with my parents and they always make me eat a lot. But well, i’m gonna try to lose as much weight as i can, i’m gonna try to exercise more (we have to understand that i’m on my last year, so it’s hard for me to have free time) and do whatever i can. And if this year i can’t, NEXT YEAAAAR NO WORRIES.
Bye skinnies!!! ✨✨
Today i binged.
Let’s start tomorrow again.
I just had to much anxiety to deal with.
☆i need more friends!☆
if you relate to any of these things, reblog and i will follow you:
- you have an eating disorder
- you’re active as of April 2021
- you want more ana friends to talk to
- you like memes
- you are willing to skip the small talk phase of friendship
- you like anime/manga
- your sw is over 120 pounds
hopefully after this post i will have plenty of people to follow and talk to♡