It’s officially December, and while my joy only grows knowing 2020 will soon come to an end, the thought of what 2021 could bring scares the shit out of me.
My life is like a thin film of vague inappropriate behavior over a massive fucking pool of sexuality
Just got a ad for bumble that said “if you give up on love, you give up on life” and I’m like oh honey that’s the idea
What if we put a bowl under our pillow as we slept to collect the dreams?
Everyone is so unoriginal when it comes to time travel. Here’s my plan. I go back to 1274 A.D. I’m chillin in feudal Japan with my samurai buddies and I’m just venting to them about the struggles of life. They understand that through my actions in 2020 I have brought shame to my family’s name, but they can all relate in some way or another. We laugh, tell each other our life stories, and drink until the sun rises. Then we kill ourselves in a very bromantic way. The end
Sorry let me just, *inhabits my body* , anyway what were you saying?
People ask me what I’ve been watching over quarantine to which I reply, “oh, just my life falling apart, hbu?”.
We’re all out here spitting into testing kits instead of each others mouths, 2020 truly is the worst
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