When I was a kid I loved the taste of cherry pits and apple seeds because I thought they tasted like marzipan only to find out as I got older that was cyanide I liked
Congratulations on building up a resistance to assassination
Today’s Princess of the Day is: Aurora, from Child of Light.
A young Austrian princess, Aurora awakens one day in the land of Lemuria, a mysterious continent in an alternate world. Intelligent and driven, she is determined to find her way home to Austria, no matter the cost.
“it’s unrealistic for all the characters to be queer” maybe your reality is just fucking boring. literally my entire friend group is queer, we travel in packs
something something self-perception vs the ordeal of being perceived
A few years ago, I went to an anatomy conference and they had a huge 3D printed vampire skull, and these thoughts have been on my mind ever since I saw the teeth up-close.
The under-utilized potential for this bothers me a lot… like in movies… it’s just bite and done!
What happened to ritual shaving or elaborate skin engraving?
I know a lot of artists/writers follow me…. can you guys do Vampires a solid?
I use my brain cell to be hella gay :3
thinking about that WoW epidemic
i was telling my dad, ever the skeptic, about corrupted blood back in March at the start of lockdown, and how the cdc studied it. how it can be used as a model for what to do and how people might act in the event of an unpredicted pandemic, and how people were playing out the same behavior during covid.
he said “so they fixed it, right? how did they fix it in the game?” and i told him the truth: they didn’t. they couldn’t control it. they had to reset the servers and roll them back to the time before the ZG encounter.
a CNN article recently referenced another “viral” event in world of warcraft: leeroy jenkins facepulling as a metaphor for the expedited reopening of businesses. what it fails to mention however is how the video ends. everyone who charges in with leeroy dies. he wipes the raid.
it really feels like that meme where it’s like “wow, cool video game reference!” and the point soaring over their head says THE DAMAGE WAS IRREVERSIBLE. THE THREAT SPREAD TOO RAPIDLY AND EVERYONE DIED.
weird reframing of the corrupted blood incident to make it seem, for some reason, like it was all selfish actions that people said was unrealistic because real people would help others. in fact its literally the opposite, it was used as real world data specifically because of the player driven efforts to fix it
The reason this plague in the game was a good model is because we had all walks of life type people reacting in different ways.
Those with healing magic would go into infected areas to see if they could save the infected or at least keep them alive through the disease. Those that couldn’t do that tried to warn players before they entered infected areas. NPC could be infected and have “no symptoms”; they could be asymptomatic carriers and pass it to nearby players.
The best part though was by the time Blizzard had finally come out and said “if you are infected, try to quarantine yourself so you don’t spread it!!” the player base was ALREADY DOING SO. The players had recognized the problem and worked together in myriad ways to fix it.
They also had negative reactions as well, another reason this was such a good example of a real outbreak. They had a couple people report healers or alchemists who were claiming to sell cures/treatments to the disease that ultimately would do nothing. They had a group of players that would hide in the mountains near cities and just pass the disease back and forth between themselves and then raid cities to infect them all over again. They had higher level players start rebelling on the servers. Saying it was an overreaction and if you get it you’ll just die and you can come back and be fine, etc. Since they could get the disease and survive, ie it didn’t do enough damage to them since they were higher level, they felt it unnecessary to care about whether they got it or not. They complained about not getting to play like normal just because this plague could kill lower level players.
ALL of these reactions, good and bad, were real enough to what we assumed a real life epidemic would play out that people started to use it as a model. And now look, we have proof that it was accurate.
However, what we needed to learn from it was primarily that it wasn’t reversible. The bad reactions and lack of care from the few players that weren’t cooperating made it impossible in the end to contain. The only reason it was fixed at all is the game had to reverse time, literally just delete their entire game log a few weeks and time travel weeks into the past to before the plague even began.
Think about that.
The reason no one believed it was a valid model is that it was a video game and thus the consequences weren’t permanent. “No one would act like that in real life.” But look at how we are handling this outbreak. Is it not eerily similar?
And we can’t time travel.
“They complained about not getting to play like normal just because this plague could kill lower level players.”
This is the most terrifying one. This is how the rich and healthy are acting about the poor and disabled.
doomsday preppers always keeping rusty tins of food in their basement but never building springhouses and smokehouses and paddocks for future livestock 🤨 those canned peaches are only going to bring you so far babe
are you going to study medicinal herbs and their cultivation or are you just going to keep stockpiling weapons like a little bitch 😩
going to shoot your way out of an infected cut, dumbass?
For a while I’ve seen this recurring phenomena of mecha artists that say they won’t draw furries on their commission info and furry artists that won’t draw mecha on theirs and it’s the absolute funniest thing to me. It makes it look like there’s this huge schism between the two like some serious shit went down ages ago.
artists have to choose early on whether they can draw mecha or if they can draw furry you can only choose one
Skill trees are bullshit
I wanna see mecha furries
Close Kept Secrets Pt.4
Chat Noir was losing it. He must be. There was no way that out of all the people in Paris, Ladybug just so happened to be the girl he had been dating for almost a year now. Not only was he shocked, but he had no idea what to do next. He was frozen in place, his brain lagging as he sat on the rooftop adjacent to the love of his life’s home. What were the chances? At the moment he didn’t know if he was beyond lucky or cursed. On one side, it was amazing that he had fallen for her twice–although not surprising– and now he knew why Ladybug was so knowledgeable about Marinette. But on the other hand, how was he supposed to tell her that he knew? It’s not like she meant for this to happen, meaning she would most likely be furious. She had promised Master Fu that their identities would remain secret. Chat definitely feared the worst in telling her the truth. But how could he keep something like this from her? He didn’t even know if he could hide it, he was so excited and confused and in love. He didn’t even know if he could meet up with Marinette at the moment, he worried what he might say. It would be really unlike him to cancel, though. It would make her suspicious. What if he gave her the wrong idea? He wouldn’t want her to think anything bad was going on.
Chat took a deep breath. He needed to keep his head on straight, this was Marinette he was talking about. He had known her for so long, socially and romantically. She wouldn’t assume anything without looking into it first. He took out his phone and shot her an email.
Hey Princess, I can’t make it tonight. Something came up for me. I’m really sorry, I’ll make it up to you <3
There were a few minutes where his brain went silent, waiting for her to respond.
Of course, Chat. Let me know if you need anything. <3
He smiled and started making his way home. The rest of the night he could barely sleep, his brain occupied by thoughts of Ladybug and his Princess.
The following morning at school he was beyond unprepared when he saw Marinette. She was gorgeous, as always, wearing her hair in a bun and a smile on her face as she walked beside Alya to the front steps of the school. He wiped his sweaty hands on his jeans as quickly as he could before going to greet the pair.
“Looking dashing, as usual, Mr. Agreste.” Alya laughed, hugging Nino against her side. Her fake flirtation did little to ease his nerves, but he mustered up a smile.
“Thanks Alya, you guys look great too.” He looked at Marinette once again, admiring her outfit. Red really was her color. Even something as simple as the red, flowy cardigan she wore over her black top. She was always stunning, but just knowing who she really was made her twice as mezmerizing.
The bell rung, brining Adrien back to reality. The four of them rushed to their classroom, barely saying a word to each other. Thankfully, their first class today was an art period, so Adrien wasn’t too worried about having to focus. He wasn’t too good at art as it was. Nino was showing him a new song he made while the girls ran off, collecting materials for whatever project they wanted to do. Marinette would normally be drawing in her sketchbook, thinking of new designs to make her friends. Her ideas were always great, even if she didn’t follow through with some of them.
“Ugh, another lame idea, Dupain-cheng?” Chloe scoffed, rolling her eyes at the sketch book she was standing over.
“Get away from that Chloe, it’s mine.” Marinette’s face was hard and irritated, but she didn’t raise her voice.
“Don’t tell me what to do, peasant.” Adrien’s eyes narrowed at the blonde, suddenly feeling protective.
“Don’t talk to her like that, Chloe. That’s her stuff,” Alya said, walking up to the snooty teen.
“Excuse me? Who do you think you are, getting in my face like that? I’ll have you know that I can do whatever I want, my daddy practically owns this school. So take,” she took one step forward. “A step,” another step. “Back,” she pushed her finger just in front of Alya’s face.
“Chloe, leave them alone,” Adrien growled, standing up from his seat.
Chloe’s face deflated, attitude shrinking down to the size of an egg. “Adrikins, why are you defending these losers? She was the one that got close to me!”
Adrien straightened himself up, taking a breath. He quickly scanned the room and noticed the whole class looking at him, including his Princess. “You don’t need to insult Marinette, and you definitely don’t need to be getting up in Alya’s face for defending her friend. Just sit back down and work on your project.” And with that he sat back down and faced the table.
Chloe was at a loss for words, but she went back to her table with Sabrina without a fight. Marinette and Alya sat across from himself and Nino, all of them in awe.
“Dude, what came over you?” Nino asked, mouth agape.
“Yeah, I’ve never seen you talk to anyone like that, especially Chloe.” Marinette eyed him carefully, almost like she was worried for him.
His cheeks were dusted a light pink. Adrien cleared his throat. “She just shouldn’t be talking to anyone like that. Besides, I think your designs are awesome, and I didn’t like her talking down to you.”
Now it was Marinette’s turn to blush. She gave him a thankful smile.
“Hmm…” Alya smirked at him, looking him up and down.
“What?” He gestured his hands outward.
“Seems like you really care for Marinette, more than usual at least.” She wove her fingers together and rested them in front of her mouth.
“Alya, leave him alone. He was doing something nice for me,” Marinette laughed lightly, putting a hand on her best friend’s shoulder.
“No, no, this is different. Right Adrien?” Alya pushed it farther.
Adrien didn’t know what to say. Should he tell the truth be rejected by Marinette in front of both of their friends? Probably not the best idea. “I just got tired of hearing Chloe hate you, you’re a wonderful person. You, least of all people deserve that.” He gave her a loving smile, the genuine kind that he gives her as Chat Noir. He almost hoped she would noticed that similarities.
“Okay, okay. Whatever you say,” Alya chuckled, turning back to her work.
Marinette studied his face for a moment, giving him a smile. Her eyes traced the lines of his face, trying to memorize every crease. She had seen a smile like that before, so happy and content. Adrien reminded her so much of her beloved stray cat. She squinted a little, trying to make sense of it in her brain. But instead of giving herself a headache she just gave it up in favor of her fashion designs. Adrien felt hot under Marinette’s gaze, even after she dropped her eyes the heat linger on his face. It was bad enough being around her as Adrien when he didn’t know she was Ladybug. Now it was like meeting his idol and lover at the same time, because she was! He felt like it was slowly killing him from the inside just being near her. He needed room to breathe.
He excused himself to the bathroom, quickly slamming the stall door closed behind him and leaning against it. When he was sure no one was in the room, he let Plagg out of his shirt.
“Very smooth back there, Prince Charming,” Plagg chuckled, flying around him.
“That’s not funny, Plagg. I’m dying here!” Adrien gave him a pained expression.
“Well, did you wanna be Chat Noir for a bit? You have some time before your next class. Some fresh air would probably do you some good,” Plagg suggested, a mischievous grin on his face.
Adrien thought it over. Art was basically a free period; no one would really miss him if he left for the next forty five minutes and came back later. He would let Nino know that he went to get some air. After texting his friend, Adrien smiled and said his two magic words. “Claw out!”
Marinette didn’t know how to feel about what happened with Adrien a few minutes ago. She had been trying to distract herself with ideas for new designs, but it kept coming up in her mind. The first thing that came to mind was that he had a crush on her. This, she knew, was complete wrong. Adrien was her friend, and he had made that clear for a long time. The second idea she had was that he knew something about her and Ladybug. She was more worried about that possibility than anything else. She didn’t want him to be in danger because he knew who she was. If he did, Hawkmoth wouldn’t stop until he got ahold of him. That was the last thing Marinette wanted. Maybe she should talk to him…Was that Chat Noir?
Her previous thoughts completely dropped away when she saw the leather clad hero jumping on the roof tops outside the classroom window. Was their an Akuma attack? She needed to get out there and help him. She asked to go to the bathroom and quickly transformed. She didn’t need to travel far before she saw him stop and sit on the rooftop just across from her home. She made herself known with a small cough before sitting down next to him.
“Why are you out here in the middle of the day? There’s no Akuma.” She looked over at his face, his eyes closed.
“Just getting some air. I was actually hoping that I would be alone but–”
“Oh I can leave if you need me to. Its just when I saw you I got worried so I came out here.” She tried to explain herself, her speech speeding up as she continued.
“No, no, there’s no need to leave. Actually I have been needing to talk to you about something.”
She took a breath and settled herself. “What’s up?”
He took a moment of silence. “I…uh…I know who you are in real life.” He looked down at the city below him, guilt spread across his face.
Ladybug was in complete shock. “Th-this is a joke, right?”
“I’m afraid not, my Lady.”
That name stopped her brain in its tracks. He knew. He absolutely knew. If he didn’t, he wouldn’t be calling her that nickname again. He was too loyal.
“I’m so sorry, I didn’t mean to find out. It just happened, and I didn’t want to not tell you. Honestly, I could barely hide it, but I knew I needed to tell you anyway.” He stopped and looked at her. “Do you need anything? I can buy you a coffee if you need a pick me up.”
“You really think a coffee is going to help me right now?” Her tone was sharp, causing Chat to flinch back. “Sorry, that was rude. No, I don’t want a coffee, thank you. I just need to wrap my head around this.”
“If it makes you feel better, I can tell you who I am.” Chat tried to smile.
“I’m not sure what to do right now.” Ladybug’s face was unreadable to Chat.
“I know this isn’t what you wanted and that you’re upset with me, but–”
“Chat it’s not about what I wanted, it never had been. I wanted to tell you the moment I agreed to date you, but Master Fu told me it would be too dangerous for us. He was trying to keep us safe. I was actually thinking of telling you, but I was still working out the details. I guess I don’t have to anymore, but we need to take a lot more precautions now.” She looked less blank faced and more determined, which gave Chat a little more hope that he would still have a girlfriend in the next ten minutes.
“Like what?” He asked, scooching closer to her.
“Well, for one, we can’t be seen together romantically as heroes. It’s too suspicious.” Chat’s ears drooped. He was hoping that they could spend more time together.
“What about as civilians?”
Ladybug thought for a moment. “Tonight, come over around ten, after patrol. You can show me who you are then. It definitely can’t be now, it’s too obvious to anyone walking by. Besides,” she looked down at her yoyo, “It’s almost time for me to go.”
Chat nodded, not realizing how long he had really been out here. “So I’ll see you tonight.” He stood with her, smiling as he admired her form. “Any chance I can get a kiss?” he gave her his signature smirk, leaning into her.
She smiled back, shoving her finger against his lips. “Not a chance, alley cat.”Part 4
amazing! Can I get tagged in the next part?
me, helping a little girl pick out a locket at the shop: do you usually like to wear goldtone or silvertone?
little girl: I like silver because of Artemis, the goddess of the moon and the hunt and also she’s a warrior and she never got married.
me, internally: never let the world change you
btw this was only a partial listing of the many Artemis facts imparted to me by this very good small child. I told her Athena was always my favorite so she also told me some Athena facts.
her dad gave me a look like ‘thank u for being patient’ and I tried to convey with mostly eyebrow moments ‘oh please I WAS this kid, only for ancient Egypt and also Marguerite Henry books’ but i’m not sure it got across
I just blocked at least three people in the notes on this for being snidely superior calling it fake.
It’s that fucking difficult to believe “a child who was interested in Greek Mythology talked about it enthusiastically with an adult who was paying attention to her”? And then the parent appreciated that the other adult was nice to his kid?
THAT’S your cut-off for unbelievable?
Do you know zero children, or are you just being a dick on purpose? Or were you just a boring-ass kid? OR are you just a dick to children who try to engage with you?
My husband teases me because I will unintentionally make friends with children in public ALL THE TIME. LITERALLY all it takes is if a kid says something to you, even of you already know about it, you go “wow, really?” And smile and nod while they excitedly gibber away.
Most kids aren’t used to adults listening to them. If you show (or feign) genuine interest with what a kid is talking about, letting them feel smart and knowledable for a few minutes, you have won them over FOREVER.
That sounds really damn creepy. Not gonna lie. You’re an adult you have no right talking to strange children.
I don’t really know how to explain to you that not every interaction between adults and children is inherently predatory? Like, for example, standing in line next to a family in Disney World and having a kid talk to you about Oswalt the Rabbit while their mother stands next to him isn’t “really creepy.” It’s a normal human interaction, particularly if you view kids as, like…people? Sometimes kids will try to talk to you, even if they don’t know you, and there are appropriate and normal ways to respond to kids when they do.
But, if YOU feel like YOU can’t interact with children without being creepy, then by all means, please avoid doing so.
in JUST Disney World I would just GIVE kids Trading Pins that I bought in bulk on line. Like, in line to meet Phineas and Ferb two kiddos were eyeing me and my SO’s lanyards and we traded pins (they wouldn’t let me just give them pins). There was a kiddo who was in front of us for the rivers of Pandora ride who was legit freaking out. Her parents were just screaming at her to be calm. I knelt and asked who her favorite Disney character was (it was goofy and I said she had good taste) and I told her I’d give her a pin, any except the like two I’d gotten that day that I was VERY attached to, if she promised to be brave and ride the ride with us. she rode, she was brave, she got a pin, and she didn’t scream or cry anymore.
Most kids get talked to like they are dumb. If you treat kids like they aren’t complete dummies they become so fulfilled! I was that kid. I was MILES smarter than other people I knew, and my mom to this day tells her friends that “[I] has a fun fact for everything”. Sharing and learning things are so important and treating kiddos like what they say matters is even moreso.
The comments be like
[Image ID: An Onion headline that says, “Newly Discovered DNA Evidence Suggests Children Could Be Closely Related To Humans” /End ID]
Listen all u internet goers……. I know everyone has some wild catfish stories and I need to know them
okay so for legal reasons this is all a very funny joke and none of it is real I promise
basically there’s a property listing floating out there somewhere online that lists my phone number as a contact for the owner of a house in a suburb of [redacted], ohio, even though that is a town I have never lived in. about two years ago, I started getting calls and texts from people who were asking if I was interested in selling the property. when I told them no and they had the wrong number, the amount of calls increased, and I had to block their numbers.
since then, once about every 3 months I get a call or text from people wanting to buy this house in ohio as they think I’m the owner. I got fed up at one point and just started replying “yeah I might be interested in selling, but the property I have is haunted. like super haunted. lots of ghosts everywhere, so you’ll have to get rid of those before putting it on the market.” to my delight, they stopped replying after that, so I now do that when I get these messages.
the last time it happened was actually just a few weeks ago, and the guy texting me on behalf of this house flipping operation actually offered to pay for an exorcism. I replied by telling him I was pretty sure the ghosts were protestant, so if he brought a priest in it had better not be catholic. he has yet to reply.
You are having literally the funniest possible reaction to an infuriating scam
listen the only way to beat a scam like that is to give them a reaction that is just way more bizarre than whatever they started with. crank the bonkers energy up to an 11 and they’ll leave you alone
unironically dracula’s at his best when he’s someone’s dad
baby: cries at 3am
these guys: do that thing where they rise from their coffin like they’re on a hinge
there’s just something funny about the mental image of dracula changing a nappy
overworked single dad dracula posting minions memes to facebook
the transylvanian peasants: accidentally bring garlic bread to vlad junior’s birthday potluck
dracula to facebook that evening:
A late nineteenth century agate hardstone minature rabbit with cabochon sapphire eyes, sitting in an upright position with finely carved fur, suspended on a yellow gold ring bearing the marks for Fabergé, measuring 2cm x 1.5cm, St Petersburg, gross weight 3 grams.
maybe i am too old for tiktok
My son once came back from a record shop visit with his uncle and with wide eyes and excited smile presented me with a cassette tape. “Look what I found!” As though he’d unearthed ancient pottery at a dig sight.
I love it. I love when my kids discover something that I take for granted. I hear songs with new ears because they are in a state of wonder. My son played me “Paint it Black” the other day, I’m like yeah Rolling Stones so what? And then I see his face and that LOOK like he just discovered sunsets and he’s like yeah but listen to this part, listen to the guitar right here - and I hear a song anew. Like watching a puppy see a bird for the first time, and oh oh right yeah birds are fucking amazing, forgot about that.
#finally a comment that doesn’t have disdain for kids discovering old things #isn’t it cool that someone didn’t know Queen and they got to hear it for the first time? #isn’t it cool to witness that excitement?
I think this is largely why “react” channels on YouTube have become so popular. Watching someone experience something you love for the first time is exciting. Rediscovering that thing through their eyes is also exciting.
the funniest thing about being ftm is the implications of the fact that I can post shirtless pics on tumblr now. I am allowed to inflict images of my nipples on this website any time I want and before I wasn’t but like. it’s the same nipples. literally the exact same ones. I just paid a guy to take them off of the tits they were once adjoined to and plonk them back down on the newly created titless wasteland of my chest. they’re. the same. I mean they’re a little phantom of the opera looking now because grafts, but still. I can’t get over that my nips are now certified sfw because they fuckin changed address. the logical conclusion then would be that the boob itself is the problem but it’s clearly not because you can post a picture of a naked boob on tumblr as long as the precise area of the nipple is censored and clearly you can post a picture of the nipple as long as it doesn’t live on a boob anymore but for some reason if you combine them together they become powerful enough to destroy the psyche of anyone between the ages of approximately three and exactly eighteen who gazes upon them. censorship laws are the absolute dumbest invention of humanity and I’m saying that as someone who owns a novelty plastic goat that screams and has watched the movie eragon. this is more stupid than both of those things.
Just Indian things
I loved this
I am in love with both the elaborate welcome this little fellow received as well as the look of complete bafflement on the puppies’ face that clearly says “I am eight weeks old and what is this.”
YES JFC EVERYONE SHOULD READ SCOTT WESTERFELDS UGLIES SERIES IT IS SO UNDERRATED
YES!!!!! like it’s definitely a little heavy handed and a little goofy at times and obviously aimed at teenagers. but. it’s also really relevant right now imo? especially regarding how much it covers stuff like how mainstream beauty standards are defined by agendas and encourage conformity, the sterilization of interpersonal relationships, the use of social media to influence public opinion and discourage critical thinking, the concept of influencers, all of it.