sink your hands into the stream bed clay, stand with bare feet on the stones, catch the rain on your face turned up towards the sky, scream your troubles into the void of the night with only the trees to listen, wait for its echo to understand them better, hold them and fold them and make them bend, create with the stream bed clay get it under your fingernails, soften it with rainwater and snow melt, fold all your hardships away into the dirt and burn it solid and unbreaking
How about we ignore that three month hiatus and enjoy these photos from last summer! I still have quite a bit of summer content to get through but don’t worry, I’ll have a few autumn and winter sets soon.
The birds in these photos are Whisky jacks/Grey Jays/ Canada Jays. They have 0 fear and landed in my hand to eat some trail mix (so mad I don’t have that video!) When we got to the summit of the mountain we actually saw the same group of them harassing some other hikers for holding out their hand but not giving them food. Must be a trail tax.
Bonus fun fact: this was the hardest hike I’ve ever done and I actually almost fainted! Please remember to drink water and take breaks when needed ESPECIALLY when doing harder hikes in high temperatures! I promise you won’t upset your group.
I’m feeling that urge to run away again.
It’s not a sad thing. Not a “life is horrible so I want to run away” sort of thing. If anything it’s mostly born from contentment. I haven’t found a job yet, but other than that I’m in a better position with my family and my mental health than I’ve been in for years. Yes, some people I love are struggling but I can’t do any more here than I could away. Mostly I’m just restless. I want an adventure. And I want a chance to rest, to be away from things and not have any expectations or responsibilities for a little bit. I crave a retreat, not a ruination.
Of course I’m not in the place to GET that, either. I have enough in my bank account that I can live just fine, especially since I’m living with my family until the market cools down enough that I can actually afford to live on my own, but I don’t have some big surplus of cash that will let me run around the world “finding myself” or whatever. I’m just…
It’s like I’m a bird, okay? And I’ve been put in this enclosure and I’m well taken care of and it’s way better and safer than in the wild. But even with that every single fiber of my being heard the other birds calling to go south and has me throwing myself at the edges of my enclosure because my DNA wants to escape and go with them. I won’t though. It’s not safe or practical right now to do so.
But someday? Don’t be surprised if I log in from somewhere far away, sitting on the edge of a dock, dipping my toes in some shore I’ve never known before.