me, when I find out an old math teacher who had a hatred for me is retiring: Oh how the mighty have fallen
art has been hard lately but i made this banana today and its probably the height of my ability and i am ready now
talented banana man
you fools…..while you studied the blade………..I studied banana
Ah yes, the great philosophers ..
Socrates, Aristotle, Chipotle
This picture I took gives me Life is Strange vibes.
person: Do you like sci-fi movies?
me: ya, I love space jam
Friend’s mom: Oh no… the dog peed on the deck again
me, instantaneously: we need all hands on deck
friend: why. why did your brain allow you to say that
white: hey have you listened to [classic rock band/song]
me: no im latina
Sorry but that’s like asking me, “Have you listened to Juanes or Fetty Wap?” and me responding, “No I’m a white woman”.
Your ethnicity doesn’t preclude you from potentially being exposed to certain music genres.
white: *crying uncontrollably* we are all one music genre….. the human genre
anyway if you support ANYTHING related to white nationalism/supremacy/nazism/racism please unfollow and block me. this is space is not welcome to you. in fact, no spaces should be welcome to you.
I started to put this in my tags but I want to be clear about this: when I reblog this I’m not just talking about people being active skinheads. I’m also talking to people who think the response to Nazism is calling for ‘civil discourse.’ People who support Nazis demonstrating or gathering safely. People who wring their hands over the idea of not allowing Nazis to be safe. People who think Nazism is just an opinion. You’re complicit too.
me explaining underwear to aliens: we have smaller, secret pants that we wear under our normal pants
This is so confusing to read as a British person
me explaining underwear to the British: oi lad we have smaller, secret chaps that wear below our normal chaps while we dump all your tea into the harbor
so I work at starbucks right and I was making this old lady a taste test drink to help her decide if she wanted a bigger size and I give her this drink right and as she’s about to take a drink I deadass said “take a fu-” before I stopped and realized I was really about to tell this 78 year old woman to take a fucking sip, babe
me, when true love doesnt solve all problems: O:
UMM Hugh had me scared there for a second I was about to find out who I need to beat for making him sad
Okay maybe I’m being a little dramatic but I’m honestly kind of offended at the lack of notes this has? Hugh CLEARLY put a lot of thought and effort into this joke, and you can tell that he’s proud of it he smiles and even chuckles at his joke. Is it so hard for y’all to show appreciation for a good man? He’s trying to be funny is Wolverine himself not good enough for you guys? God
That satisfied dad laugh at the end