i think something a lot of ppl dont understand is that the effects of trauma are not immediate. its not like you’re fine and then the event happens, and then everything falls apart. yeah, that CAN happen, but so often, that is not the narrative i see.
depending on the event, you may even brush it off the first time it happens. sometimes its not until it reoccurs that it hits you. because if it happened once, it was only that, your life moves on, but again? whats to stop it from happening a third time? a fourth time?
depending on the event, it may not affect you until someone asks about it days, weeks, months, YEARS later. you push it down and decide not to feel anything about it and maybe you even forget, at least on the surface, but it takes only a word to break the barrier you’ve set
depending on the event, you may not even know it’s trauma until years have passed and you’re crying on your bathroom floor. until you meet someone who calls it trauma. until you read someone elses story. until you’re begging your mind to please, please, let life move past that point
depending on the event, you forget entirely. there’s nothing there. nothing happened. and you live like that until something digs in too deep and the floodgates break.
yeah, some of us break down right after it happened. some never go through the dormancy. but god, thats not everyone. im so tired of hearing “but you were fine!” so WHAT? so what if you were fine? you arent fine now and thats just as real a response as those who are impacted in the direct wake of a trauma. dont let anyone ever tell you otherwise.