capricciosso :

klaus, ten years later, still bitter: hey let’s play never have i ever

sunny: when are you going to let this go. it’s been so long–

klaus, interrupting: never have i ever gotten my way with violet simply because i insisted on something

unfortunate-stranger-losers :

Sunny Baudelaire, upon seeing any heterosexuality: 

pizdulgiver :

some of y’all have never been in cahoots and it shows

chasefox :

Darling, dearest, dead.

mysticolosa:

apeachscone :

olaf is the prime example of a genuinely bad character who did a few good deeds in his life and doesnt get redeemed because of it. the baudelaires did not mourn for him. they buried him because to them, they felt thats what they should do. they still hated him. count olafs ending is not an excuse to crown him your “uwu precious angel who was misunderstood.” he is a bad person who had a few good moments. dont romanticize his abuse of the baudelaires just because he carried kit to the island.

mildredhubble :

what happens in a certain place can stain your feelings for that location, just as ink can stain a white sheet. you can wash it, and wash it, and still never forget what has transpired - a word which here means ‘happened, and made everybody sad’. — lemony snicket

douglaseiffels :

If you have ever lost someone important very to you, then you already know how it feels, and if you haven’t, you cannot possibly imagine it.

gellavonhamster :

champagne for my real friends - a VFD party playlist (or, an absolutely not serious ASOUE fanmix for having a good time with associates who just might stab you in the back later)

01. i don’t know how but they found me - do it all the time // now we’re so young, but we’re probably gonna die / it’s so fun, we’re so good at selling lies

02. panic! at the disco - vegas lights // oh, if you only knew what we’ve been up to, i guarantee you’d keep it secret

03. saint motel - to my enemies // to my enemies, those were the best days of our lives

04. fall out boy - champagne for my real friends, real pain for my sham friends // we only do it for the scars and stories, not the fame

05. johnny rivers - secret agent man // ah, be careful what you say, or you’ll give yourself away / odds are you won’t live to see tomorrow

06. neon trees - sleeping with a friend // all my friends stay up past midnight, looking for the thing to fill the void

07. the correspondents - fear & delight // you’re an enemy who i’m keen to defend

08. fergie feat q-tip & goonrock - a little party never killed nobody // a little party never killed nobody, so we gon’ dance until we drop

09. postmodern jukebox - die young (ke$ha cover) // so while you’re here in my arms, let’s make the most of the night like we’re gonna die young

10. billy joel - we didn’t start the fire // we didn’t start the fire / it was always burning since the world’s been turning / we didn’t start the fire / but when we are gone, will it still burn on?

first-impression-s :

Sometimes when you’re sad the only thing to do is draw beautiful women.

atwq :

Esmé: I’m hosting a party to find out who stole my sugar bowl. I bought a polygraph test on amazon for $99. After it is done we will celebrate with drinks and appetizers!

klydebaudelaire :

The children felt a shadow over them, and looked up to see a tall, skinny figure standing over them. In the darkness the children could not see any of his features, only the glowing tip of a skinny cigarette in his mouth.
“Do you three need a taxi?” he asked, and gestured to the automobile that had brought Justice Strauss and Jerome Squalor to the entrance of the hotel.
The siblings looked at one another, and then squinted up at the man. The children thought perhaps his voice was familiar, but it might just have been his unfathomable tone, which they’d heard so many times since their arrival at the hotel that it made everything seem familiar and mysterious at the same time.

lisondraws :

Evolution of Beatrice Baudelaire, born Anwhistle, the woman with the dragonfly shaped scars, remarkable and flammable. 

Asoue Project│Redbubble│Instagram

snowscoutalphabetpledge :

i know technically the trailer dropped but emotionally i can’t bring myself to watch it bc im not ready for the end on multiple levels

update i watched it

i know technically the trailer dropped but emotionally i can’t bring myself to watch it bc im not ready for the end on multiple levels

lisondraws :

Very quick doodle but I really wanted to do something ASOUE to wish a Happy Hanukkah to those who celebrate it ! 

Asoue Project // Instagram // Redbubble

outofcontextsnicket :

A refrigerator may hold a basket of strawberries, which would be important if a maniac said to you “If you don’t give me a basket of strawberries right now, I’m gonna poke you with this large stick!”

Slippery Slope

unfortunate-stranger-losers :

the asoue instagram didn’t post anything advent after day one and my theory is that daniel handler physically manifested behind whoever thought that was a good idea and whacked them over the head with a frying pan

in the past ive always had this headcanon that hanukkah was a kind of trying time for the baudelaires (and others) due to their long and fraught history with fire but like now… now im super into the idea of hanukkah as it is meant to be, a light in the dark, memory, revolution, etc, and them claiming that is very good… they tell stories and sing and sunny makes sufganiyot and the dreidel games are very intense and competitive and it’s very healing

jewishsnickets :

ill go first 

professorvonspooky :

basically what I’m saying is that Sunny will be a weird kid. 

(Also please respond with constructive criticism because the layout/text placement is a mess but i don’t know how to fix it) 

unfortunate-stranger-losers :

“For instance, if you were in a restaurant and said out loud, ‘I can’t wait to eat the veal marsala I ordered,’  and there were people around who knew that the veal marsala was poisoned and that you would die as soon as you took a bite, your situation would be one of dramatic irony. Dramatic irony is a cruel occurrence, one that is almost always upsetting, and I’m sorry to have it appear in this story, but Violet, Klaus, and Sunny have such unfortunate lives that it was only a matter of time before dramatic irony would rear its ugly head.” 

phony-time-traveler :

eegor-not-aigor :

Post The End Baudelaire siblings!

“There is a kind of crying I hope you have not experienced, and it is not just crying about something terrible that has happened, but a crying for all of the terrible things that have happened, not just to you but to everyone you know and to everyone you don’t know and even the people you don’t want to know, a crying that cannot be diluted by a brave deed or a kind word, but only by someone holding you as your shoulders shake and your tears run down your face.”

godsgrief :

i would take on entire armies for violet baudelaire

fangirling-in-general-idk :

“Is the elevator out of order?” Violet asked. “I’m very good with mechanical devices, and I’d be happy to take a look at it.”

sergeantames :

sunny baudelaire, the youngest, liked to bite things. she was an infant and very small for her age, scarcely larger than a boot. what she lacked in size, however, she made up for with the size and sharpness of her four teeth.