please turn the sound on you won’t regret it
Hearing “for the sake of a comedy bit, look what I’ve done.” and
“That’s the worst thing that’s ever happened.” in such a deadpan voice is something I can never recover from tbh.
one time in 2007 i crashed the entire club penguin website. it was down for 2 days. i was banned for life.
many of you have asked, and so i shall give:
in 2007, my older brother gave me a small piece of information that would soon result in the shutdown of Club Penguin for a few days. he taught me a glitch in the club penguin system that, when sitting in the coffee shop, would make your penguin sit on the ceiling of the coffee shop instead.
and with this piece of information, i took off. i spent hours going to every server over and over, saying the same message: everyone meet in the coffee shop tomorrow at 7 pm in the snowball server. i did this in every single server, in every location i could find.
then, finally, 7 pm the next day arrived. snowball had a population rating of 5. penguins poured into the coffee shop, all awaiting my instructions. i then gave the next message, that of the glitch. i told everyone to wait exactly 3 minutes, then perform the glitch. they did. every penguin in the coffee shop was suddenly on the ceiling, and either the club penguin coding or the club penguin offices had no idea what to do, and no way to take us down. for a small glimpse of time, we ruled victorious – nothing and no one could stop us.
every great kingdom awaits its downfall, however. eventually, the website crashed. no one could go on the website for 2 days after that. my penguin was banned for life.
You don’t have to fake orgasm to help your partner’s ego. The guy I lost my virginity to wrote a play about the experience, and the character based on me gave a monologue about how she regretted sleeping with him because no one else would ever be that good. So, yeah. Just tell him you didn’t cum.
Im sorry he wrote a fucking what
One day, you get a knock on your door. When you open it, you see the protagonist from your favorite book standing there, wide-eyed. “I know you won’t believe me,” they say, “but you’re the main character of my favorite book. I know how it ends and I’m here to change it.”
“Oh thank god, my life is really spiraling out of control lately” you say, relieved
Harry Potter pulls out a handgun “I think you misunderstand the point of this visit”
Why can’t American shows be this great
Girl with the glasses is a real one
honestly when aliens arrive we should start having sex with them as soon as possible. so when they decide to take over a lot of them already have emotional connections/physical offspring and will form a sizeable resistance. not me, i don’t want to, but i know a lot of you would be into that, and i’m telling you it’s okay, you’re actually the last hope for our species.
did keith’s dad write this post