there’s a bit of a pattern to who fundy targets with his funny roleplay affections
I think the hardest thing about recovering from depression, the thing I don’t really see talked about much (maybe this is just a me thing, maybe it isn’t) is how guilty it makes you feel.
There are moments where you feel…. Good. Maybe not deep in a depressive episode, where emotions feel like they’re across the universe and you’re drowning in an ocean of your own apathy, hands reaching up to the stars but never to touch. Those are the days where your lack of care is a shield as much as it is a knife in your hand, with the tip pointed to your throat.
But outside of those episodes? Where you’re not quite happy but you’re at least feeling something? Those days where your self hatred and your desire to hurt is a passive thing, not something you fall into headfirst in a desire to feel something other than the darkness of the depths of your apathy… Those days are when recovery feels like it’s right in front of you but you don’t want to reach for it.
It’s an apple sitting in the palm of your hands. It looks so pretty, contrasted against the black sludge in your body, visible from your veins. It’s something that looks like it’s for people who aren’t you. There’s a fear there, knowing you could take a bite, but wondering what it would taste like. Would it be sweet, like those who are okay would say? Or is it bitter, like you fear?
Is it even for you?
Those days where you create something, finish a project, wear a cute outfit and you feel smidgeon of pride light within you. Feel a spark of hope and light and taste sweet nectar on your tongue. And then the taste is washed away by the bitterness of your guilt, because that apple isn’t for you, isn’t for you to take a bite of.
Better, you think, to stay just under the surface of the ocean. You can’t reach those stars, but you just want to look. You want to see their spark and feel their heat, but you’re too afraid to reach again.
It’s a dangerous feeling, hope. And more than that, it’s not what you deserve.
Or that’s what your depression tells you. It’s an addiction, a vice, a voice in your head telling you that you’re nothing without it. Who are you without your mental illness? What are you without the sickness in your veins?
It tells you you need it. Tells you that you are fine with it, that if you get better than you’re leaving it behind and it’s been there for you. Tells you that how dare you think you deserve better, what about your friends? Are you helping them, or leaving them? Selfish, selfish, selfish.
So for a moment, just a moment, you feel proud of yourself. And then you remember that you’re not supposed to feel that way, and so you stop.
designed karl and redesigned eret :D
[ID: two brightly colored pictures on an orange background. the first depicts eret standing tall, in full king’s regalia. he wears a blue tunic with puffed sleeves under a red cape, and shiny high-heeled boots. the second depicts karl, smiling with his arms spread wide. he wears a purple tunic over a magenta shirt, and a green sash. he is wearing a cape that is purple on one side, and turquoise on the other. both of their outfits are covered in gold trim and accents.
I would love to see BBH in your style 👉👈
Just realized I hadn’t drawn him before. Blasphemy. Here he is!
so they put up these new signs at the ima and they make the whole thing feel very alice in wonderland kind of
but the ones with words on them are really great
Literally, my internal monologue when I’m outside.
hey since chat is canon, during that infamous peer pressure scene, do you think the voices played a part in that? like, they race blood and everything and they were (i think?) chanting blood for the blood god so like…. maybe chat was a part of the peer pressure?
I call upon the fan fic writing gods to bless you with the perseverance to finish one of your unfinished drafts.
May your fingers dance along the letters upon your device with ease, may the devil of distraction stay far from you, and may your work not need much editing.
I pass this blessing upon every fan fic writer out there.
it’s funny how c!niki and c!jack’s defense for targeting tommy is that they want him to learn a lesson, while they’re literally planning to kill him. while they’re literally planning to fucking nuke him. what lesson will he learn, guys. he’ll be fucking dead. you’re just gonna kill him. where’s the lesson there 🧍🏼 /j
see this is what im on about when I say that revenge arcs aren’t character arcs!! there’s no fuckin growth to be had here! revenge arcs are a plot device to fuel character arcs!!
theyre both covering up the fact that they’re using tommy as a scapegoat for their own feelings of helplessness and hopelessness. that’s the underlying character arc that’s going on right now, an exercise in powerlessness and what people will do to get that control back.
if tommy dies, to them, to dream, to ranboo, to whoever. when these characters get their “revenge” their arc won’t be over because the underlying arc of overcoming their learned despair won’t be done. there’s no growth to be had in killing tommy, in getting revenge. in fact, his death (should it happen) would be a catalyst for actual growth cuz they’ll (hopefully) realize that it has solved nothing.
theyre still helpless to those around them. they’re still weaker than dream. they will still have problems. and they’ll have to face the fact that they’re using a child AGAIN as a bandaid to their problems and its not going to work.
I wouldn’t be surprised if Tommy dies on wednesday, however, that would cause issues
Tommy’s role as a main character seems to be coming to a close, but there are so many new arcs that depend on him being there.
A lot of people want him dead, and want revenge on him. If he dies at Dream’s hands, that ends their arcs there, and incredibly suddenly.
Tommy and Tubbo have gone after Dream since the beginning, that’s their role. Ranboo makes sense as being the next protagonist, but I don’t think it makes sense if they get rid of Tommy’s relevance.
I agree with a lot of this, but I think if they kill tommy it won’t end the others arcs. because all these people want revenge on “tommy” but in reality they just want something to lash out at and tommy has always been the scape goat. the first war he gave up his disc’s, wilburs manipulation of him in pogtopia, hell tubbo exiling him.
tommy has taken the fall time and time again and if he dies that doesnt end these other character arcs. it makes them have to actually analyze why they feel the need to kill a child who has already apologized and changed and it’ll make them examine their own actions. it’ll force them to grow as they realize their scapegoat isn’t there anymore, and they’ll, maybe, actually examine themselves and ACTUALLY grow
aight listen im not saying that people should stop streaming dsmp cuz it does rocket up views and stuff like crazy but what I am saying is that they should take season breaks.
part of this is because theyre doing a lot of heavy rp which, as someone who’s done dnd, does follow you into your real life when you’ve been doing it for so long. some of these guys have been doing this type of stuff for months on end, very few breaks. they need some time to heckin rest.
part of it is cuz, I love the story. I really, really do, but these guys have some communication issues which leads to conflict in schedules which leads to some really bad spots for some streamers. and they’re all good enough to still pull it off and make it interesting lore wise! but they shouldn’t have to. get a Google calendar and share it. iirc you can get multiple people to edit the same calander and it’ll be easier for you to know if your on the spot lore stream is gonna be conflicting with someone else’s. its…. really not that hard guys.
third reason is that we the viewers need time to catch up on anything. im not saying there are too many storylines in asense cuz well. you pick your favorites (for me, techno and ranboo) and you stick with them. its fun that way and can lead to some really cool moments cuz you’re just as clueless as the people you’re watching! thats fun!
but sometimes I see glimpses of a story (for me the tommyinnit exile arc and the thing bad has going on rn) and I want to catch up! but if I try then I’ll not be able to keep up with ranboo and techno and they take priority so I end up…. never watching those streams.
no this isn’t necessary for me to enjoy the smp. of course not. but a season break isn’t there just for show. its because the break gives the creators some downtime and let’s people not previously invested catch up in time for the next season! the longer they go without a break of some sort, the more they’re alienating new viewers!
tl;dr the streams for the smp don’t need to stop or even really slow down, but the plot ones do.
okay yeah philza was a bitch to tommy ain’t no denying that but like…. is tommy canonically his son? cuz uuuh iirc thats not been said in canon? and as for philza even adopting tommy on the smp in anyway I dont… see it? like, they didn’t really interact much in canon iirc? maybe I dont watch tommy enough so these questions are genuine but I see all these takes on how philza is replacing tommy with ranboo and I just…. don’t see it? like, are you guys not just mixing up their irl dynamic with their character ones?
tl;dr is tommy canonically phils son cuz that would make the recent things wayyyy different and if so where could I see the clip?