i just want a boring love. a love that doesn’t need fights or arguments to keep the fire alive. a “let’s sit and read on opposite ends of the sofa” love. an “i thought of you when i was doing the dishes” love. an “i would rather be at home with the love of my life right now” love
I used to be a grader and an occasional substitute prof for an introductory astronomy lab. That means that the majority of the people in this lab are only taking it because it’s a requirement and about half of them think it’s an astrology class.
I was grading midterms and this one girl. She was so nice and I think she was a business major. Fuck. The question on the midterm was to draw a diagram of the solar system and this poor girl. This fucking girl had drawn a Mars-centric solar system. As in every planet and the sun were orbiting Mars. I now actually have a custom Cards Againsy Humanity card I got at a con that says “A Mars-centric solar system”
I had a boy argue with me that there was liquid water on the moon (this was around when they had found liquid water on Mars in ~2015) and he wouldn’t believe me that he likely meant Mars and not the moon. After I marked his answer to the relevant lab question wrong, he took it to the department head who had promptly laughed him out of the office.
And there was another boy who, during a lab in our observatory where we would look at certain things in the sky, asked where the sun was. At 10pm in November. After some questioning it was revealed that he thought the moon and the sun were the same thing.
My friend, whom I love dearly, found out that the moon orbits the earth as a 20-year-old in an upper-level political science class, and was utterly and completely flabbergasted. When questioned, her defense was that she doesn’t have anything to do with the moon, so why would she have needed to know?
i was once talking to a friend of mine about how at that point in time you could see mars, jupiter, and venus at the same time, which was pretty cool, and she said “where’s pluto? wait, it was destroyed” and that’s how i found out that my friend, who is in her third year of a medical degree, thought that pluto stopped being a planet because it was eaten by a black hole.
Sherlock Holmes not knowing the Earth orbits the sun startin’ to look less unrealistic now huh.
andrew garfield saying, “i hope this grief stays with me because it’s all the unexpressed love that i didn’t get to tell her” about his mothers passing is so gut wrenchingly beautiful because we rarely talk about the love we want to express but can’t, not because you’re not brave enough to say it out loud but because they’re not here to listen to it anymore. calling grief the love you never had the chance to share makes it less of a burden and more of something you want to keep and not something terrible you want to move on from. i love love how everything about grief always comes down to “what is grief if not love persevering?”
“disproportionately” is a wonderful word in that it is very helpful in talking about phenomena that hurt large groups of people but hurt specific groups worst. and it exists so that we do not inexplicably argue suffering and struggle is isolated to one or two groups
i think the funniest and realist thing i’ve realized lately is how troubling idealization can be. every person is just… a person. the very people you want to impress or be apart of are just people. even if they seem wildly intimidating because of the way they look or because of their reputation, every one is just a person. human. as embarrassing, as remorseful and they are going through stages of growth just like you are. we only see what we want to see and then drown ourselves further in our own depression and we don’t have to.
truly and i am learning the less i idealise others, the more willing i am to meet people where they are warts n all. and the more willing i am to show myself too and bring my whole self into things. my own embarrassment becomes a new normal and fine thing. stumbling becomes more endearing.
had a teacher once who told us “idealizing people is just as dehumanizing as demonizing them” and that stuck with me so much
so trans people are “exactly who they say they are”. but teena brandon was quoted, near the end of her life, as saying “brandon is gone. i’m just teena now.” does she get to be who she said she was?
marsha p. johnson never claimed to be anything other than a gay man and a drag queen. does he get to be who he said he was?
some people on this hellsite still call me “him” even though i desisted years ago. do i get to be “exactly who i say i am?”
oh, i get it. the only ones who are “exactly who they say they are” are the ones increasing the numbers and influence of this new church 🏳️⚧️
@fernstream since you asked about a source https://www.triviavoices.com/the-inconvenient-truth-about-teena-brandon.html
Always be extra skeptical with so-called historical trans people, especially if they were homosexual. Of course our heteronormative society would prefer to remember them as straight people suffering with an “inconvenient” body, rather than the gender-nonconforming gay people they knew they were.
Oh fuck I forgot superhero movie fans still use this site. Well, I’ve had a good run everyone