saying “desmond the moonbear” evoked the same kind of response as saying “road work ahead?” now so im right
asdfmovie was the vine of its time
Ouch. Every single part of this hurt.
the user base of tumblr is a specific demographic of people who were ‘the smart kid’ growing up but didn’t do as well academically as they got older due to mental health struggles, were probably bullied in school and were quite lonely & introverted so they took solace in reading but now rarely pick up a book, grew up on tumblr but continued using it into adulthood unlike most of their peers who stopped using it after it lost popularity
Unsure if posted before
Botany is literally just delicious tea or deadly poison
wasn’t this originally a tumblr post? someone’s typed it out, printed it and stuck it up somewhere, then someone else has taken a photo and put it on reddit and then someone else has stolen it from there and posted it back here.
do not confuse the lack of foot traffic outside for cleaning the environment. big oil companies dumping oil in the ocean and large industries polluting greenhouse gases are what is hurting the planet.
animals going into the city is just entropy, it is less noisy or they have become dependent on human food or they are foraging. that is just normal. not a sign that mother nature is healing. just shut up.
people aren’t the problem, capitalism is what is causing global warming and climate change. we need to stop massive waste and large scale pollution.
god im going to be fucking hallucinating this video for months ok there’s just so much to this to break down
- the initial fact they’re talking through a hand puppet with the oobi eyes
- the horrible, horrible desynch between their words and the movements of the hand
- lack of any clear place the hand is looking
- “dwells in the depths”. just the whole sentence itself and the weird inflection on it.
- the fact that the dude clearly already discovered this thing and was so moved by it they went to record it
- “wuoah”, and the split second of open-palmed hand that no longer resembles a puppet
- the weird fade in on the music and the fact it sounds a little distorted at first
- the very specific but undefinable emotion conveyed by the music
- the inconsistent zoom
fantastic analysis but you forgot the banana in the chair which is integral to my enjoyment of this video
my mum, going through a list of dystopian novels that describe the world:
so that’s where we’re at. Pls to reset simulation now.
I was baking a strawberry shortcake for my mom when I realized that I forgot the baking powder. I began to panic so I pulled the cakes out of the oven; they were already completely baked but they rose just fine without the baking powder? I was staring at them in confusion, trying to remember if I accidentally put yeast in the batter, when I felt a shadow loom over me. I looked over my shoulder only to find Luigi. Luigi tenderly took my hands and told me, “You need not worry, for I will accompany you in any and all of your baking endeavors.” I have never felt more loved in my life. I cried.
I thought this was the mother of all shitposts and then I saw the url
why do i never see the url?
No one reads urls on tumblr. Which actually works out well for the one-time-i-dreamt tumblr posts, I think, because just like the original person, we are not aware at first that we are inside the dream. And then at some point — usually towards the end when things have gotten weird enough that it’s clear this can’t resolve properly before the end of the post — we check the url and understand, much like a sleeper waking up.
Once something goes up on one-time-i-dreamt it becomes a dream we all experience, together.
ITS BEEN OVER 2000 YEARS (according to google)
I’m sure Julius Caesar felt the same fucking way about the knife
this knife has caused me more suffering than any amount of editing will in my life
DOES THE GOOSE HAVE A FUCKIN KNIFE TOO!?
Your wish is my command
i hope it’s okay that this one is stylized;; our dear time traveler must stay with the times if they must wreak havoc appropriately
Oh my god
Put him in Pompeii
May I present a humble alternative, where the goose is present during the bad thing happening, example:
You are my personal hero I hope you know this
Say no more
OH IF I HAD PHOTOSHOP THE TITANIC WOULD BE MY FIRST TARGET
Photoshop the goose from untitled goose game into the background of a photo of a place where something bad happens, but it’s a photo of before the bad thing happening, so it’s implied that the goose caused it
tumblr mobile, crashing for the fifth time while i simply try to read a post: for the last time, that post is REDACTED you cannot read that post
me: fuck you *copies direct link to post and opens it in browser*
boris johnson’s speech about the UK coronavirus outbreak was literally the ‘some of you will die but that is a risk i am prepared to take’ speech from shrek verbatim
“we’ve done what we can to contain this disease”
no school closures, no ban on public gatherings, no lockdown in heavily affected areas, no testing for those showing mild cold symptoms just advised to stay at home for 7 days, no mandatory self-isolation for those living with confirmed cases (a huge problem in london where EVERYONE flatshares), no limitations to public transport, no museum closures, no cinema closures. but it’s ok, all public restrooms have a4 posters reminding people to wash their hands, job done for this tory government.
That’s because all Tories are fucking bastards.
useless cringe ass country
…this being a HANDSHAKE meme makes it perfect. - _ -