#Aki speaks Tumblr posts

  • neko-shinigxmi
    19.01.2022 - 1 day ago
    || Picrew Used ||

        DrakenNier SI! Part “Replicant” (first image) and “Automata” (latter two) in one go.

    Dian [Replicant]

    They’d be one of the villagers from- well- Nier’s village! Eldest child of the florist, as well as...one of the few to survive a surging illness.

    A gentle soul in the first half of the game; dear friend to Yonah, and tries to look after her while Nier is away. (They get into trouble sometimes, when he overreacts out of concern...but it’s never to a degree that would put anyone in legit danger.)

    Admires Devola and Popola; when not helping their mother with running shop and keeping stock, one can often find them in the library, humming one of Devola’s songs while either reading or shelving books.

    The second half of the game has their concern raising and they start... Acting abnormally. Listless and spacing out more; their mother worries, but Devola and Popola (who are equally worried for any potential problems) can’t find anything physically or mentally wrong with them. Something is wrong, but what it is...they can’t figure it out. And what cannot be worked out...cannot be cured.

    It doesn’t help that their empathetic nature picks up on Nier’s suffering; they’re one of the few to still treat him gently, while acknowledging his pain. Also one of the fewer to actually like Kainé and Emil hanging around.

    Clicks with Emil, honestly. They get along perfectly...and those who befriend Emil are soon to befriend Kainé, whether she wanted a new friend or not.

    (Also swings between treating Grimoire Weiss with earned respect- like saying his full title- or none at all, like calling him Yonah’s nickname for him: Weissy. This leaves everyone else amused and Weiss, conflicted.)

    Later ends up learning how to wield daggers. Wanting to help Nier and Co., while protecting the villagers.

    Was one of the few people told about what was going on, given their own hand in supporting...everyone involved, more or less. It was a harsh thing to take, but it most certainly explained some things. (Like their erratic mental state and the Shade that’s been lurking in the background of their life.)

    Stayed close friends with the group to the end. They even helped Yonah and Kaine improve their cooking skills, teaching them all sorts of recipes.

    .:.

    However, far down the line in Automata... Enter YoRHA Unit 14H. Assigned Pod-116.

    They/Them || Nickname: Hayfor, Zeen .:. Haydee, HD

    Height: approx. 161cm

    Weapons: dual daggers, “Falling Stars”

    Used to be top of the line. Very quickly started suffering memory issues that were hard to fix, even for other H-units and Bunker staff. In the end, as long as work could be completed...it ended up being left unchecked after that point forward. (If the occasional wipe out needed to be done by a friendly E-unit when their mind started failing or got too curious.)

    Was a part of a big operation during one point of the machine war. Ended up being the sole survivor, narrowly. Was lucky enough to do minor repairs on the field (taking from another model who had also died), crawl towards the Resistance Camp, get found, and receive the necessary care to resume full functionality. (Even fixing- but not wholly curing- their forgetfulness; it no longer would cause data decay over time.)

    YoRHA had thought for a time that they had died; records were updated, allegiance to YoRHA reinstated...and they stayed on Earth. Decidedly wanting to stay out of command’s hair, for a variety of personal reasons. Instead, they’re the secondary medic if the twins- Devola & Popola- aren’t around or are otherwise busy.

    (Most of the time, though, 14H is “on call”; they’d rather cautiously roam and enjoy the world on their lonesome than deal with other androids 24/7. They left the Bunker for that reason, y’know.)

    However... Calling them “H” is only partially true at this point. Their functions have since become a dual D/H-type, due to the model they took from...being a Defender-type. Deciding to take it one step further, they later returned to where the fight went down, harvested the rest of the needed parts (with much muttered apologies), and became the first “HD” model.

    ...Yes, they call themself that knowing what it means. They think they’re real funny. (And got to hear Scanners ramble a lot during repairs, so they have some fun tidbits about human life they like to think back on in quiet moments.)

    Very fond of their Pod. Would honestly get into a fight for their Pod. (116 has always appreciated the thought, but has been- expectedly- stiff. Of the two of them, their Pod is more aligned with YoRHA’s specifications than 14HD is.)

    Has a hard time adjusting to and trusting people since their repairs. They’ve started up the concern of potentially being in a really bad spot and going offline for good... Death. But their friendly attitude rarely gives this away.

    True hair color is also white by default! They just dye it brown. It doesn’t hold well in water, however, for whatever reason...so they often have to hide out or wear a custom-made umbrella hat to avoid it washing out. (No water parties with other androids, either!)

    #Aki speaks #Information on the Inserts #time to finally post this WOWZA #it's been a good few weeks; this thing sitting in my drafts #but hey!! finally finished it so now #it posty time!
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  • neko-shinigxmi
    19.01.2022 - 1 day ago

       Thinking about how I got to watch Belle for my bday and making that into a self-insert AU...

    [ Belle spoilers below the cut!! ]

       Like... The most important thing to consider is, first off, the fact that the main point of the story is: “you can hide behind something- this avatar- to give you strength. It can be a crutch to help find yourself again...but someday, you should take the chance to be yourself. Because that is the real you. The you that others should see.”

       ...Maybe could be worded better, but. Man, as someone who wants to hide behind an avatar as Suzu does... I relate to this point so deeply.

       Even more than that, however, is the amazing twist of the Beast being a friend character; Suzu has a romantic interest in someone, but he’s not Beast. Instead, it’s this tough boy who’s defended his little brother. Who needs protecting as much as his brother does from a horrible father...

       The part of me that loves romantic AUs almost wants to go back to the traditional “Beauty and the Beast” origins to this twist on the tale....but also?

       There is most definitely a lump in my throat at the idea of keeping this a platonic story with an SI and my platonic fave(s). There is something so deeply touching about dropping everything for someone else; saving someone else for no deeper reason than, “We are human. We deserve kindness and love. To look out for each other, and be looked out for in turn.”

       .....In the end, this is timed perfectly bc my obsession with NieR has meant I’ve been hung up on thinking deeply and more.....pondering, I guess, of the nature of humanity. It’s something I’ve always toyed with in my head a little, cause I’m idealistic by design and constantly have to live in a cycle of confrontation with that and reality. (Where things are not always kind and loving people are ripped away too soon.)

       And Belle hits it on the head. Another little moment of raw emotion combining with a need to help people...just because. Because we deserved to be loved and cared for. If even for one little moment, to give us the strength to go forward.

    #Aki speaks #this ended up being more....rambly than anything HOWEVER #I still think doing an AU of this would be fun and nice #the songs especially are kickin my ass rn
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  • neko-shinigxmi
    17.01.2022 - 2 days ago

       Well... Gonna need to update all my stuff today, LMAO. (I’ll probs eventually change everything to 20+ after this point, bc really... Updating 20+ (ironically) accounts w/ my age is driving me bonkers.)

       Also... I’m officially planning some things and I’m so excited?! AAAA!

    #Aki speaks #I don't want to go into it publicly... #so if you reeeeeaaaally want to know...hmu on Discord
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  • neko-shinigxmi
    15.01.2022 - 4 days ago
    #Aki speaks #Jan. 16th!! another year on this messy planet!!!!! #but if you're reading this #thanks for making these years worth it #you've been here with me; whether you interact daily or not #(yes even the lurkers!!) #YOU helped this blog become more #you helped me find some happiness #I've gotten to see you guys move onward and forward #and I'm so proud of YOU too!! #thanks for being here everyone
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  • neko-shinigxmi
    15.01.2022 - 5 days ago

       Wanted to work on NieR insert. Instead, all I get is dizziness and exhaustion.

    Time for forced rest, I suppose.

    #Aki speaks #I wasn't able to read this morning #so I'm just gonna hope...that taking a break #will lower the chances of that happening again
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  • neko-shinigxmi
    15.01.2022 - 5 days ago

       NieR is the best AND worst thing I’ve ever gotten into bc the endless amounts of Free Lore drives me nuts in the best way. I love thinking about the complexities of humanity and learning abt people THROUGH how they read and interpret humanity. (I’m one of the “foolish hopeful” types... Like, I can’t be too idealistic anymore, but fuck if I don’t hold onto my shattered hopes that maybe, maybe, maybe...)

       But also it’s a gut-puncher at every turn and I. I have to handle this somehow??? [SOB]

        (I’m going to make an SI that is SO self indulgent and then it’ll make me cry more, probably.)

    #Aki speaks #I'm reading more lore tidbits and feeling that sadness roll in #thanks Yoko Taro....my poor heart #also fun fact my current cosplays are Popola (Replicant) #Fyra and maaaaybe Emil?? #I mostly just want to Steal [2B's] Look but... #HMMMM idk....can't make up my mind
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  • neko-shinigxmi
    15.01.2022 - 5 days ago

    (it’s actually almost nighttime moving into the last day, but shhh)

    #Aki speaks #so like.....less than 48 hrs more than 24 LMAO #ya boy has been reading NieR lore all day #and planning out Fyra cosplay #even tho it's simply not possible at this time #(RAY CHASE is coming to a con here??? WHAT) #(the only thing I could MAYBE pull out fast is 2B....and even then...) #(hhh I just...need have him sign something ig) #(we'll figure it out at a later point)
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  • neko-shinigxmi
    13.01.2022 - 1 week ago

       ...My birthday is in 3 days. Oh boy.

    #Aki speaks #I'm a perpetual gift giver and spoiler of friends #I KNOW what's comin' for me #and I'm y e l l i n g #no fear [your bday is coming up and friends can yeet payback at you] One Fear
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  • neko-shinigxmi
    12.01.2022 - 1 week ago

       Honestly, I keep wanting to do more ask games/encourage asks, but like... My brain is so scattered. What would I even ask for or about...? 😦

       Like. As of today (it’s 1 AM here, so by “today” I mean “the 11th of January”; I don’t count “tomorrows” until I wake up), Replicant has been finished. Saw all of Automata... Currently eating up more lore as we speak.

       So I should encourage talk of NieR, right? Yes, but also no!

       Because I am still- very equally- invested in FFXIV! Because my brain cannot leave THAT series alone ever since I started playing it... Still not all? You betcha! I just drew my new FNAF SIs earlier today! One will be getting their inking today for lineart, too. Oh, but there’s also my renewed interest in Chobits, so maybe I’ll mess around in that world, too? OH OH, and Rahela, my Castlevania SI! The cutest idea for a proposal fic occurred to me a long while back, so we have that...

       Seriously, my brain is at a mile a minute. Hyperfixations? I wish I knew her; I’ve been cycling through everything I ever loved at a breakneck pace that cannot hit the breaks until my brain damn and well decides we’re good.

       .......someone help me, LMAO!

    #Aki speaks #every single thought!!! all of them!! #but I WILL be going off abt NieR #you have my goddamn word on that one
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  • neko-shinigxmi
    11.01.2022 - 1 week ago

    Me: I don’t really...wanna ship w/ anyone from NieR. I’m just here for a fun time and deep thoughts.

    My Brain: So get this... They vie for your attention and pout when your SI accidentally brushes them off, not taking it too seriously.

    Me, shoving that thought down: Shut up, shut up, shut up--

    #Aki speaks #literally my brain was like.... #[REDACTED] vies for attention but keeps falling short #but overhears a convo involving my love of cats #and fuckin' BUYS CAT EARS AND A TAIL #(Miqo style bc it's REALLY grown on me) #and sits around pouting bc they're waiting for attention to be RIGHTFULLY given!!! #I'm fucking losing it holy SHIT
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  • neko-shinigxmi
    09.01.2022 - 1 week ago

       ...I am once again saying that I might wear glasses, but I still can’t read!! Ask meme was “write a PARAGRAH” and I really looked at that... “I can’t read, but you can’t stop me” kind of energy, dkfjghfdjsk.

       LIKE. TO BE FAIR... Even if I had noticed it asked for only a paragraph, I would’ve STILL written a whole drabble/mini-fic anyways, bc it is physically impossible for me to write LESS when more exists....but a’ight.

    #Aki speaks #I'm a lil embarrassed to have not noticed but #at the same time the result would've been abt the same #so....not much changes LOL
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  • neko-shinigxmi
    07.01.2022 - 1 week ago

       It’s time for emotional whiplash!! Where I try to not burst into tears bc I’m re-reading a fave Wrench fic and trying to desperately not drown in my feelings again.

    #Aki speaks #otp; purrfect anarchy #another year is slowly but surely coming up... #plus I have a candle I rlly wanna get #bc it reminds me of him #and goddammit that just makes me wanna cry MORE #I love this ridiculous man so much it's NOT FAIRRRRR
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  • neko-shinigxmi
    06.01.2022 - 1 week ago

       I ended up wanting to officially move my fics over to Ao3 because... Tumblr is becoming more and more of a mess, and, sincerely...I wanted to have a more organized, less-messy place to host my fics. (That isn’t going to change the whole damn tagging system on me, therefore rendering my previous fic compilation post moot since NONE OF THE LINKS WORK ANYMORE!!)

       ...Anyways, in doing so, I realized that I ended up pranking myself into noticing one of my old fics was written pre-era of me making up a sort of “pseudo-language” for Rahela (my Castlevania SI) to speak instead of what I used at the time.......which was lorem ipsum.

       This is a long way of me saying: I had to edit out lorem ipsum-speech to make way for even FAKER pseudo-language! (“pseudo” bc I’ve never taken a language class in my life and so have NO idea what I’m doing)

       .....Anyways, feel free to check it out: here

    #Aki speaks #otp; love will never leave us
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  • seralin
    06.01.2022 - 2 weeks ago

    Me: *sobbing* and they were a found family! And all he wanted was for them to be happy! And they annoyed him so much but he still loved them! And he was willing to give up on avenging his family to keep them safe! And he died! *sobbing intensifies*

    My friends: drew, go the fuck to bed

    #crying over csm at 3am ✌️ #/gen btw im actually crying #most of the time when i say im crying over something its hyperbole but not this time #im just so emotional over aki man #he deserved so much better #csm#csm spoilers #major csm spoilers #chainsawman spoilers #major chainsawman spoilers #chainsaw man#seri speaks
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  • neko-shinigxmi
    02.01.2021 - 2 weeks ago

       Well, well, well... Might as well get started on talking about Purrfect Anarchy! Their story for Legion is finally planned out...and while the fics won’t be coming quite yet, I figured I could still share what will be happening for the road ahead!

    Wrench left DedSec for baby.

    (Kat got pregnant, they had a long talk about where to go from here... It was kinda agreed they couldn’t keep as they were with a baby in the picture.)

    Baby was sort of a surprise. Kids were loosely talked abt, but no plans made to have one any time soon. DedSec helped with those plans [to put off having a kid].

    DedSec was still p upset about two of their operators leaving, but understood. Kat + Wrench moved out of the apartment and up into someplace bigger w/ Princess Leia (their cat), settled in, and prepared.

    Kat also officially gets Reg’s surname; Rachel Blechman. (They still get a giggle out of it, much to Reggie’s eye-rolling- but still very fond- amusement.)

    A third joined them during these years. Reg got a big ol’ crush on a guy (Zane), Kat approved, he was cool with it... It became a Thing. Everyone was pretty content with it...or so it seemed.

    The relationship blew up around the same time as Rampart tried to get away with scamming Reggie (Zane got worked up over Reggie not leaving Kat for him, thinking they were “better together” and hating that he couldn’t marry Reggie; this hurt Kat deeply and Reg wasn’t having it). The whole fiasco had The Wrench back and running, wanting revenge. 

    Kat wasn’t thrilled.....but understood and supported him. He ended up leaving the US to chase down Rampart, while Kat promised to catch up to him soon.

    Kat would appear at the end/near the end of the Bloodline DLC, giving Wrench assistance and letting the player meet their kid. (Who’s 13 years old. Already pretty damn smart and witty to boot.)

    #Aki speaks #otp; purrfect anarchy #{ ok to rb!! } #I ACTUALLY FIGURED MOST OF THIS SHIT OUT!!!!! #HELLL YEAH I DID IT #it only took me.....idk how long; A Time #BUT IT'S DONE I DID IT IT'S DONE
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  • neko-shinigxmi
    02.01.2021 - 2 weeks ago

       Things I’ve ended up doing in the last two days:

    finally “finished” the story for Purrfect Anarchy (aka their story for Legion is ready~!!)

    working on Spiderverse self-inserts; specifically, Black Cat AU (hey, if anyone can be a Spider.....why can’t I replace a villain? ;P )

       Hilariously, that last one ALSO made me realize I’m somehow still ruining Spider-Man’s life by being nice. (Obvs I’m still a sneaky lil shit, but I realized my SI- as a Black Cat- would be INCREDIBLY nice and force him to remember to honor his boundaries and just.... Man. Shit gets complicated. It’s a lil funny.)

    #Aki speaks #something abt the new year....is inspiring me #and I love that
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  • seralin
    01.01.2021 - 2 weeks ago

    I've been reading chainsaw man (finally) and I started last night but I'm already over halfway through 😭😭😭

    #currently in love with aki and power #i desperately want angel's gender #and beam is so my beloved #csm#chainsaw man#seri speaks
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  • neko-shinigxmi
    31.12.2021 - 2 weeks ago

       OH, and I wanna go on record to say:

    Sun / Moon (bc I believe them to be one and the same) are my friends now!! We’re having soft tacos creativity class and naptime later!

    #Aki speaks #unfortunately a Certain Someone is still making money off the franchise.... #makes me smad HOWEVER...!! #I will still do whatever I want #bc I ain't giving him money #but I will give OTHER ppl money and I think that's Neat
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  • oikawabreakme
    29.12.2021 - 3 weeks ago

    time to talk about given!

    tw given spoilers and my rambling under the cut

    I’ve been writing a post about why I love given since the first season finished airing bc I was that impacted by it yes I watched it as it aired and since then it’s become one of my fave series

    I don’t think I’ll ever finish that post so you get this instead! my half assed thoughts bc I just rewatched the given movie

    part of why I love given so much is bc I related to mafuyu a lot. at the time it aired I had also lost someone I loved so I very much related to mafuyu’s grief. while our circumstances were different, I saw a lot of myself in mafuyu and the episode where he sang his song was so extremely cathartic omg I cried like a baby watching it. honestly I think it did help in my healing even though like I said our circumstances were different we were both grieving a lost love and it was so nice to see him express those feelings.

    now the given movie oh man that also hit all those same wounds again. a couple of years have gone by and I’ve mostly processed my grief by now but seeing akihiko and ugetsu’s relationship reminded me so much of the relationship I was grieving when I watched the first season. I saw parts of myself in both aki and ugetsu but I resonated the most with ugetsu for his fear of letting go. and seeing that scene of the concert where mafuyu had processed some of his grief and was in a good place, trying to communicate to ugetsu that it’ll be okay…broke me lol bc here was someone who struggled so much to verbalize his own grief, finally did, came out the other side, and was now trying to help another person understand that things will be okay…that got me and obviously spoke to me bc yeah it’s been years since my breakup we’re calling it a breakup for simplicity but when I think back to what happened some of the ugly feelings still poke their way through

    and the scene immediately after it where aki and ugetsu both finally let go…yep I cried like a baby again! seeing that they both very much still care for each other but knowing they’re not good for each other, ugetsu’s distraught face once he realizes things are over and tries to reach out to aki only to be met by the image of mafuyu’s reassuring smile before calming down..ah it just really gets me!!!

    overall given to me is like a warm hug. it reminds me of similar things I experienced and then says I see you you’re not alone things will be okay and that’s why I love it so much and I highly recommend it

    #rina speaks #yes we’re not talking about THE THING with aki and haru bc it pissed me off #haruuuu <3
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  • frostyjake
    21.12.2021 - 4 weeks ago

    im gonna go around asking engene ccs what their favorite moments are, of their bias on-stage 🤸‍♀️

    #꒰☆彡꒱— karma speaks #i did it for aki #her reaction was priceless fndjjnsnz
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