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how are fine line, after hours, and hollywood’s bleeding all supposed to win aoty will an exception be made or
9circles. post malone.
it came pretty early than the album. the first single i guess. i didnt even liked it. then the album came. i found it okay. more time went; and like the “og post malone stuff” i vibed badly. late december, january was the time songs made me hallucinate. they took me places.
i was sitting on the roof of my house. probably the last week of december ‘19. it was dark; nine'ish would be a suitable claim. i was stargazing like i used to sometimes when i wasn’t feeling myself. it was pretty cold. there was a little more than no wind, just enough to make the hair on my arms spike up. i put the playlist i named as “lovely” on. all the bright places made me realise a lot of things; pne being how beautiful the word “lovely” was. i was involved immensely in stating at the tiny little dots in the immensely big sky; wondering how the biggest of the objects in this galaxy seems the smallest when circles played. i dont know what triggered inside me, i put the song on repeat just because i was about to go in some sort of trance.
soon enough, i found myself in the middle of nowhere, driving in the silent eerie night on a road climbing upwards a mountain i didnt knew existed. there was no else but me im the car. i couldn’t figure out what the car was though. the night was so dark that the only things visible things due to the car’s light were the trees on the right side of the road going up along the road, which was making an upward spiral. on the left side, through the silver light of the moon, i could figure out a trail sorrounded by shiny green leaves which i figured was the trees sorrounding the road left behind. on looking on a wider scale, i saw some other hills; dark enough to observe anything on them, in every direction i could see. and that’s when i noticed circles was playing in the car’s music system. i immediately started relieving inside this reality i didn’t knew existed. i saw my younger self; acting crazy to get even the slightest bit of her attention. i saw the kid me being a hopeless, acting all “clay cray” because he didn’t got the acceptance he needed. i saw him being confused in his own thoughts; doing everything he could to gain any attention to fill the hole that was created by the attention of the specific individual he never got.
and i saw her, so beautifully ignoring, declining yet not, being the bigger person, being a flawless person; and i forgot the sadness. i knew nothing was going to happen; and i think i didnt needed anything now. i was satisfied. satisfied by the things she gave me to think about; by seeing her happy, with or without me. i saw her smiling. and that was the best thing. i kept driving, listening to same song; thinking of her, thinking of me; and how silly but lovely this journey was; until was i woken by the sun’s ray falling straight in my eyes. i looked around but found no car or hill or trees or a beautiful scenery; instead i found i fell asleep on my rooftop. i checked my phone, it was seven something. i rushed back downstairs; hoping my parents wouldn’t know; knowing i won’t ever forget the last night.
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Post Malone with Circles lyrics.
Drawn with copic marker pens over torn brown paper.
2I just keep on hopin’ that you call me
You say you wanna see me, but you can’t right now
You never took the time to get to know me
Was scared of losin’ somethin’ that we never found
Hollywood’s Bleeding // Post Malone
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Post Malone at the Scotiabank Arena in Toronto, Canada on February 14, 2020
Photos by me! <3
10(via https://open.spotify.com/track/4VginDwYTP2eaHJzO0QMjG?si=zpFIhv5pTSWC4CKMCNniZA)
This damn song won’t get out of my headddddd
2If you keep staring at the Sun, you won’t see
What you had become, this could be1I want you out of my head
I want you out of my bedroom tonight
There’s no way I can save you
‘Cause I need to be saved, too
I’m no good at goodbyes
Goodbyes
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