the postal dude seems like the kinda guy to be upset abt having to get out of bed to piss so he just pisses himself :/
HELLO I MESSED UP IT SEEMS LIKE I SCARED SOMEONE WITH A POST OF MINE THAT INVOLVED BELPHIE CHOKING THE MC.
THIS IS MY FAULT I’M VERY SORRY ILL MAKE SURE TO PUT A TRIGGER WARNING I’M VERY SORRY I DIDN’T MEAN TO SCARE YOU.
False alam it was not a hand choking post but it was that one tiktok post that I said that I got belphie vibes from but still I should have put a trigger warning for manipulation. Even if It didn’t scare anyone I will now put trigger warnings on my post which I should’ve done from the start. Like come on I read fanfic with trigger warnings I should’ve known better to put some as well.
Im a failure to me to my parents to my friends and to my future self.
i just dont do anything right. my sister is better than me in every way: she’s prettier, smarter, talkative and extroverted, she talks to people and i dont, my parents love her and she is the favorite. I know it so well.
Every day I do the chores, I respect my mom and do what she tells me to do. I make my food.
My mom makes my sisters food, lets her sleep as much as she wants while i do everything…and at the end of EVERY DAY guess what: im the bad stupid useless ugly dumb full-of-failure kid. I dont even have the right to have feelings or cry secretely. nope.
i just wonder you know, why am i alive.
I feel sick to my stomach…
I’m in the middle of my zoom class…
I feel like shit….
I think I’m about to have a breakdown in the middle of class
nonono i just need to hide it
my teacher’s probably gonna call me out on not doing work
im sorry i cant focus i cant function im sorry im not ok im sorry
OH I FORGOT TO MENTION
~Rest in peace~
thought y’all would appreciate this from my most recent wip
or: fundy deserves better but he’s not getting it in this lmaoooooo
i just dont get how you could do it
my question today is:
do they really hate me or am i just overthinking?
does anyone else just not have a sense of self? its like i am just going through the motions of my day to day life,, it doesn’t feel like anything is changing until the changes already happen? suddenly i am a senior. suddenly I’m accepted into college on an honors program?? when did i have good enough grades for honors?? i have a 3.63 GPA, in America 3.0-3.5 is considered good..so for me to have above the standard is astounding to me. i don’t remember doing well in school to get this. I look back to see all A’s and B’s on my transcript but all i can remember is failing hundreds of assignments. i remember crying to my math teacher, i remember pulling all nighters to finish English assignments, i remember skipping school and just ditching assignments because i felt like it. when did i do well enough to be above average, let alone good?? i feel like i dont deserve the good grades that i have, but obviously i do because they got on my transcript SOMEHOW..i had to have worked for them.. but i just dont remember how. it feels like im cheating someone else out of their grades or that i am invalidating someone elses hard work because i feel like i didnt work hard enough for it like they did.
to make this even worse i got accepted to a college with some merit scholarships. i have $225,000 in scholarships for this college, all based on my grades. what?? thats insane?? thats nearly 4 years of tuition paid in full. i should be over the moon about this but it just feels,,, wrong? it feels like i dont deserve it. i should be giving it to someone else or the college made a huge mistake and accidently sent it to the wrong person? how could i of all people deserve that much money? it feels like ive done something horribly wrong. i feel like i cant tell this to anyone because they will think im trying to brag or something when i feel terrible about this whole situation. this is so stressful but i feel like i hve no right to be stressed out because i am in a much better situation than many other kids my age are.. i have good grade, and have nearly a full ride to college yet i am complaining?? i have the audacity to get stressed out over too much money when so many others have so little?? am i a horrible person for this??? god i wish i didnt exist i wish you didnt have to pay for schooling i wish everyone had the same opportunities i wish i could remember my own life i wish i wasnt numb for the last four years i wish i could actually enjoy when i am given something i wish i wasnt so guilty for things i have no control over i wish i could take pride in my own work..
Really accurate 😭 haha
one day i told my mom that the sole thing of imagining myself talking with people or just one person made me already super nervous and i was telling her the truth i had always been like this but she just looks at me like i’m talking crazy shit, like , no mom this is real why u lookin at me like that i-
Bea and Nigel when Nick’s out of the house:
I have never read the Harry Potter books or watched the movies and don’t know anything about them, so here are my best descriptions of what I know. I hope this is the right order.
Sorcerer’s/Philosopher’s Stone - It has mixed titles and I think one of them is correct but I have no clue. I think that’s the one with “Yer a wizard, Harry”. There is a fancy stone I’m guessing? And there is a hat.
Chamber of Secrets - I think someone writes something in blood on a wall or something. Is this the one with a guy with a face in the back of his head? And a book. There is something about a book.
Drinking thing of fire - Can’t remember what it’s called. There is a world cup or something, Harry participates in soccer. OH and Edward from Twilight is in it
Prison of Asskabin - There’s a sketchy fellow who is a criminal but he is also someone else I think. He has a name, but I don’t know who he is. Um something to do with a color. I don’t know what. I want to say blue because that seems like a wizard color.
Half-breed prince - I guess there’s a prince? Who is a human and wizard? Or something like that. Harry and Emma Watson go back in time or something. Ronald throws a hissy fit. Is the guy without the nose, Voldemort I think, and he’s Harry’s father right? That’s why Harry is the half-breed prince. Other Gandalf dies.
Deadly Hallows - This is the only title I am actually sure of. People die I’m guessing. But I think the main three all survive so who else dies? Harry’s father, Voldemort? Probably because he’s a demon. Emma Watson and Ronald finally kiss I think.
I literally don’t know anything about this series or many other popular series so I’ll do this again.