I’m lithosexual! 🥰🏳️🌈
I’m lithosexual! 🥰🏳️🌈
I’m confused about the difference between lithosexual and aegosexual 😩
I had my first kiss and I’m feeling more gray/demi/asexual than ever
Hey I usually try to stay positive, or at least light heartedly negative, in my posts but I wanted to talk about this.
I just reblogged a post wherein I added my experience with asexuality and religion, but I just kinda want to add to it
Basically what I said is that there is a cultural pressure to get married and have babies and… that’s it. Nothing more nothing less, literally. A lot of christian folk despise anyone who isn’t cishet and that doesn’t stop when it comes to asexuality.
I am out to two queer friends. That’s it. I can’t imagine how much of a hellscape my life would be if I was fully out to the people around me. People around me see a straight christian girl, and I hate it, but it’s what keeps me safe. I honestly can’t wait for when I get the hell out of dodge.
Some people might not get this. Like “oh, you’re ace? That’s a basically like celibacy on crack, religious people must love that.” Nope. Nopety nope nope. They do not. Refer back to “cultural pressure to get married and have babies”. (Not saying that you can’t be ace and still want children and marriage and all the such, it’s just not what I want)
A lot of ace people are told that there is something wrong with them or they “just haven’t met the right person yet”. And you know what? It is decidedly not fun to constantly have yourself or you sexuality degraded and invalidated.
I don’t mean to offend religious people with this (unless you’re a raging bigot, then you can go fuck yourself right off a cliff) this is my view based on personal experience, but I do at this point in my life bare a lot of resentment towards christianity for the way I was brought up and the culture I am currently living in. I am constantly surrounded by sexism, racism, homophobia and general bigotry that is largely influenced by religion.
I know there are churches who accept queer people and that is absolutely amazing, but that doesn’t help me in my situation.
What I have to get me through things is my one friend, the internet, and the knowledge that I can one day get away from all of this and be myself.
I am a hopeless romantic. I very much want to fall in love and find a woman to spend the rest of my life with. That’s pretty common knowledge around these parts.
What’s not so well-known is that attraction to a specific person is relatively rare for me.
That crush I’ve been vagueblogging about is the first person I’ve come even close to being attracted to in almost four years. And even then, it’s not actual full attraction. It’s potential-for-attraction, which is the first stage for me. Real attraction only seems to come once we’re at least middling-level friends.
Sometimes I’ve wondered if I’m demi (romantic and sexual). I can experience sexual attraction, but I’ve never had it for anyone I wasn’t romantically attracted to first. I’ve never looked at a strange woman and thought, “yep, this actual woman, and not just the abstract concept of women and specifically a woman I’m dating, is sexually attractive to me.” And sex isn’t high on my priority list, relationship-wise. If I really was attracted to someone and she turned out to be ace, I don’t think that would be an issue for me. I already explained my weird romantic attraction process.
I’ve held off on exploring this for two big reasons:
1. I always seem to see only demi-romantic people who can take or leave romance in general. And like I said, hopeless romantic. Yesterday I was literally singing “Ten Minutes Ago” while I sewed and imagining waltzing around with a beautiful girl. I watch Ever After and sigh at lines like “It is your mouth that has me hypnotized.” I know what line from Carmilla I want on the inside of my wedding ring someday. don’t get attracted easily, but I very much want that attraction to happen.
2. “Gay/Lesbian” is the label that I care about the most. I am a woman who is exclusively attracted to other women. That’s the thing that makes me feel connected to our past as a community, the thing I fought to feel comfortable as, the crux of the matter for me personally. How frequently I feel attraction and what it takes for that attraction to exist never mattered as much. I don’t usually feel the need to get into that label. I’m a lesbian- the rest is trifles.
3. What If I’m Just Picky?™
But I do wonder sometimes. So I’m putting it out into the universe- my wondering. It’s not overly important to me, like I said, but there it is.
I just changed my gender/sexuality blog’s title to “Ineffable and Un”F”able n honestly I just wanted y’all to know bc I thought of it just now and I think it’s fucking hilarious
So how does one know where on the ace spectrum they fall? I’ve always called myself demisexual but i kinda… know that’s not right? But idk where i fit? Help me
I tried (it didn’t work that much) to do some lockscreens with one of my fav quote of RuPaul’s song with some ace spec flags….if you have any suggestions/other flags to do, pls tell me💚🖤💜
Aspecs (including questioning aspecs)! Are you doing NaNo? Want to share something about what you’re writing? =)
Guy #1 - going out for two years, talked about asexuality once in a while, eventually broke up because he thought that asexuality is my choice and I can change that
Guy #2 - going out for 5 months, talked about asexuality only when Mario Adrion came out and I was proud so much, broke up because my joy was “obtruding him with this abnormality”
Guy #3 - going out for a year, talked frequently about asexuality, sex etc., broke up because of after a year he “finally realised I won’t sleep with him”
Note: I don’t believe that either guy is a bad person. I just think that the society where sex is everything unables me to have a satisfying relationship without sex.
Shy, grey-asexual, gay wizard with fantasy themes for anon!
Ace week has probably passed but I just want all asexuals to know that they are welcome on my blog. I have seen their community first hand and they are wonderful little community bound by their lack of sexual attraction.
I want to empathize asexuals are loved here because lots of lesbians who previously identified asexual are bitter against asexuals and say it’s harder to be gay than ace. I will admit being a lesbian is definitely harder than being asexual but that doesn’t mean the struggles of asexuals aren’t valid. Asexuals struggle because they live in a world obsessed with sex when they aren’t interested in it. This can range from being looked at as weird because they don’t like sex to being bullied and at risk for corrective rape. Maybe these struggles don’t hold a candle to gays like; not being allowed to marry each other, getting fired from their jobs, being denied necessary things from society or worse, being murdered for being gay, yet that doesn’t mean the struggles of being ace are meaningless and they need support.
I probably am somewhat biased to the ace community because I’m still wondering if I’m demisexual or not. I experience on sight attraction when I see a girl’s body and for this reason people wouldn’t say I’m demisexual. Yet, I only want to have sex with a girl once when I feel emotionally connected with her. In general, I seek deep emotional connections with people yet I find it hard to open up with people and often feel vulnerable when it do it and since sex is highly personal, maybe it’s no different from any other form of exposing myself.
Regardless of if I identify as biromantic ace, demisexual lesbian or plain lesbian who doesn’t like hook ups, aces I love you all and have a great late ace week!
Me, asexual, trying to explain to my crush that I love them but that I never want to have sex with them:
Two friends of mine are writing a book on Aro/ace topics. They’ve already got a publishing company, but they need some help to cover printing costs. It’d be awesome if you could share the link around and donate if you’ve got some spare change (though this book will be in German)
I wanted to ask this blog because I know you’ve got some German mods.
Anyways, here’s the link
Thanks so much!
Expectation: Listening to something innocent like old school Taylor Swift
Reality:Jamming out to My Darkest Days and Simon Curtis
Expectation: probably religious in some way
Reality: Extremely Athiest
Expectation: No-one is attractive to them and never has a preference.
Reality: Finds people attractive even if it’s rare and I can tell why people find someone attractive even if I dont. Still has a few preferences.
Me, questioning my romantic and sexual orientation for 1084679th time and still having no final answer:
I just remembered that this is a thing that I own.
Sadly, the record is shattered and unplayable.