I heard of Charles lee from Hamilton but i never knew how bad he was until i watched Turn: Washingtons spies. Holy fuck have i never hated someone as much as i hated him. I hate that it’s based on actual history because i kept wishing for someone to kill that snake
So I had a dream the other night that I was at school (i know, a nightmare.) I got shoved down the stairs and it was bad. I was bleeding from my head and was probably about to die. There was a teacher at the bottom and she was about to help me when I said
“Owie, my spween” and died
She laughed so hard she couldnt revive me.
At my funeral they played my last words over and over until everyone had died from laughter.
5 Reasons Not To Be Too Impressed By Alexander Hamilton
Chuck “Not A Founding Father” McCarthy
Don’t get me wrong, Alexander Hamilton was an impressive guy. He was a smart guy and accomplished many things others have only and will only dream of, but if you read his biography or watched Hamilton the musical and walked away thinking, “I’m such a loser compared to Alexander Hamilton,” here are a few things to keep in mind when comparing yourself to Alexander Hamilton.
1. You probably know how to use a computer, a cell phone, drive a car, turn on a TV, use a car radio, and maybe even fly a drone. You have had to learn how to use one computer after another, and how many different cell phones have you had in your life? Alexander Hamilton never even had to learn how to type. The typewriter was invented 20 years after his death. Imagine what you could learn or accomplish without having to learn how to type on a Blackberry only to have that skill made completely obsolete 5 years later?
2. Hamilton wrote the bulk of the Federalist Papers and was one of the authors of the Constitution, but he didn’t have to know how to spell. People in Hamilton’s time could really just make up their own spelling for most words. If you didn’t know how to spell something… you just spelled it the way you wanted to spell it. Alexander Hamilton was no different. He even misspelled Pennsylvania in the Constitution. Imagine how much brain power and stress you would save not worrying about spelling or correcting auto-correct.
3. Hamilton made his name in New York City, arriving a nobody orphan and working his way up to be one of the most important figures of the American Revolution. It’s impressive, but… a little less impressive if you know that there were only around 25k people living in New York at the time, many of them illiterate and or indentured servants and slaves. When I went to the University of Georgia, there were 40k+ undergraduates, and almost all of us could read. The population of New York City now is 18.8million. Basically, even the big pond was a small pond back then, and it’s always easier to make a big splash in a small pond.
4. He was constantly buzzed. Everyone was a little drunk almost all the time back then. How much confidence do you have in your ideas when you’re a little buzzed? Now imagine being buzzed all the time, that being cool with your boss, and everyone else. Plus, you don’t have to worry about getting a DUI, because cars haven’t been invented. I’m pretty sure I’ve solved at least half the worlds problems while I was drunk, but I never stayed drunk long enough to start a new country or something.
5. There was no Internet. There were no movies. There were no TV shows. No streaming services- Hulu, Netflix, Amazon Prime, Disney+… nothing. There weren’t even that many good books back then: The Bible, Shakespeare, Homer, and maybe some erotic pamphlets from Benjamin Franklin. That was it. Hamilton was never tempted to surf the web endlessly while watching all 13 seasons of Murder She Wrote- something that’s almost impossible to not do if you’re buzzed. The fact that you get anything done is a major accomplishment.
If you still feel inadequate next to Alexander Hamilton, just remember. He never made a gif or a meme. He didn’t even know what those things were!