July 1st, 2020
Karma always comes back around. If you’re a piece of shit person karma gets you in the best of ways. She allows you to feel like you’re happy and then she bangs. He just added more onto his sentence. At the very least for anyone who has suffered at the hands of these fucked up humans.. we can hold onto the fact that karma always comes back around.
0June 30th, 2020
No more lessons need to be learned. But for real the universe is sooooo powerful. It removes people and things from your life that no longer serve you, and gifts you soo many things. I need to be more grateful because everything that I received the second I got him out of my life was a straight up gift!! Truly. And I am thankful but I need to be more positive with that.
0June 30th, 2020
Continued on with the reading… idk it was July predictions.. makes me worried but whatever everything is and will be okay.
0June 30th, 2020
Something reminded me of how throughout 7 years this man couldn’t keep a job for the fucking life of him…. it was always something right. He made excuses all the time about why he lost his job. Now he has a reason to stay where he is right now because his girlfriend works there. Mark my words though… he won’t last at this job either. It will be an endless cycle with him.
0June 30th, 2020
Considering what he did do, I don’t understand how or why he continued to tell me he was going to kill himself. Even when I broke up with him he continued to say he ruined his life and was going to… like hello??? At that point I didn’t give a shit what he did but to guilt someone into being in a relationship because I didn’t want his death on my hands is insane when clearly he didn’t want to be in the relationship anymore? Like it’s just all bullshit to fuck with my head more. He is a sick fuck
0my romantic advice to friends (which they ask for more often than youd imagine) is usually “talk to the fucker or break up,” which isn’t wrong, but i try very hard to balance that with “but when you ignore my advice i am absolutely still a shoulder you can cry on”
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ああるふぁいぶYouTubeのコメント欄に質問をいただきました。本体であるこちらブログにも転載して、さらに詳しく過去記事リンク個人的コメントを足しておきます。
（各SNSに展開させていただいてるああるふぁいぶですが、内輪話的コメントは大抵ブログ内だけに留めています）
——-質問ありがとうございます。これはインタビューやVlogなどで本人たちが話したことを元にした私の考えです
1.エリントンとライデルが別れた原因
ふたりとも別れの理由を発表してないので詳しい話は親しい人しか知らないでしょう。ライデルは「お互い求めるものが違った」と説明しました。私は、別れる以前のライカーの話や本人の様子から、結婚に対する考えが決定的に違ったのが大きな要因だと思います。別れる前のライデルチャンネル等では少しの間「結婚を迫るライデルと逃げるエリントン」というのが定型になっていました。半分冗談ネタかと思っていましたが、ライカーがマイケル・ローゼンバウムとの対談で「エリントンは結婚に及び腰だ」と言っていたので、かなりマジ逃げだった模様。
かたやライデルは10代の頃から早く結婚して母親になるのが夢、と広言していてストーミーママもそれを強力にプッシュしてましたから、ふたりの結婚観が相当違ってるのはファンの目にも明らかでした。私は個人的に、エリントンがいつか根負けするんじゃないかな？と思っていましたが、彼は曲げませんでしたね。
0I miss you so fucking much, and I’m so goddamn sorry I was never enough for you.
You treated me like shit then you left me, and it’s been two years and I’m still convinced you ripped a part of my soul and took it with you when you left.
I lost the love of my life when I lost you.
You lost someone you didn’t care for when you left me.
I’m so sorry pretty girl.
I will forever love you, no matter what.
- Your little girl
1When I was with my boyfriend, I always had a special “goodbye” catchphrase, I guess. Everytime he left me at home, talked and had to leave I said “Go away! …But not too far!”
The story of that catchphrase is behind my dependence mental problem. I always felt ashamed of it, and he knew. But, everytime I said those words, I was actually meaning “(Stay with me, and) Go away (idiot)! …But (please) not too far!
That was my way of letting him go home, a hard feeling to tell. I tried to think he wouldn’t leave me, and I believed him.“I need you, don’t leave me. Please, don’t leave yet, I can’t stand it. Don’t leave me alone!” were words from the past that made me bleed until I sank.
Today we took some distance, we broke up and it hurts, but not like before. Because he treated me right, and I wanted to give my best. So that catchphrase helped me:
It was my first step to move on and face the love I lack of. The start of thinking “I let him go home with no begging. I know he won’t leave.” I knew those words were like sweet and a pride to me, but I never knew. Now I know It was because I was fighting for a change. And I’m crying, but it’s okay. If I made that change is because I felt loved, and a good love.
I’m sorry if my English sucks, k. I needed to share this. I’m proud of this…
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One morning,I suddenly wanted to get back with him.I took my phone and dialled the number that I had deleted once.I was sure I could recollect it.Suddenly I remembered all the pain.The pain from betrayal.The pain from cold words.The pain that was too painful.Something said to me,“Love shouldn’t be this painful."I put my phone away while fixing my glance at the book that read,"Petals fall,but the flower endures.”
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