A Sass in the Ass (Fluff?)
Note: I honestly had so much fun writing this, despite a cat in my lap so enjoy!
Warnings: Sass Overload, Sass-off, damn Wolffe roll those eyes harder, just a bunch of clones being kids, just a bunch of kids being clones, (Y/N) about to throw hands, Chaotic!Clones, few swears
(Y/N), Fives, Tup and Echo decide to wake up on the sass train and cause a little mayhem on base, what could possibly go wrong?
To most people, everyday is just another day, yesterday was then, now was today and tomorrow is just lurking around the corner. Nothing was special about time when it came to the lives of normal people, they just lived life as they usually did, in the safe, protective shadow of the Republic army. They lived without the knowledge that they were in fact, relying on a bunch of bloody children in mens' bodies. As they lived their normal lives, somewhere among the towering building of Coruscant, lay the clone barracks, a place that seemed quite from the outside until....you walk through its front doors.
"Get back here!"
"Who ate my kriffing yogurt?!"
"Ew, she licked me."
Chaos erupted in the mess hall, many voices overlapping each other, each sentence as chaotic as the last and in the midst of it all was a certain commander who quite frankly, was so done with everyone at this kriffing table. Cody stabbed at his food while Tup wrestled with (Y/N) who was trying to lick the tear tattoo from his face after he said "pfft, you wouldn't lick me." to which proceeded to the female proving otherwise.
Fives was ranting and raging about his toffee yogurt going missing which (Y/N) had brought him from her homeworld, which Dogma had snuck under the table and was currently eating. All while Waxer and Boil chased Kix around the hall, trying to stop him from killing Echo over a joke about people paying electricity bills and life support to which the 501st medic flew into a rage but Cody wasn't entirely sure what had been said. So he just blankly stared at his troopers chasing Kix, chasing Echo, wondering when he would have to stop babysitting them all. He wanted to just walk away, take his food to his room and scream into his helmet but he knew he couldn't leave them unattended, because General (Y/N) was far from capable of being the "adult".
"Ack! Gross! That was my ear!" Tup suddenly shrieked.
(Y/N) jumped away from him, spitting, gagging and making dying noises as her fingers clawed at her tongue. It seemed that the general and Tup had been wrestling sloppily enough for the female to accidentally lick the inside of the arch troopers ear. The sight, almost made Cody crack, almost.
"Why did you move your head? Ew, it tastes so bad, Tup you are definitely not a yummy boy." (Y/N) cried dramatically, causing Fives to stop his ranting about his yogurt.
"Exqueeze me?!" Fives squealed dramatically, putting a hand on his hip and clicking the fingers of his other hand while his voice went up and octave or five. "I don't know who you think you are but my vod is scumdidilyumptious, you harpy."
"Harpy! That's not what yo donor was saying to me last night."
"Bish, that man is dead, Windu went all Queen of Hearts on his ass and said OFF WITH HIS HEAD."
"Damn, must have just been one of your hotter brothers."
Just as Cody was about to slam his head on the table, a tray of food was suddenly slammed down in front of him, causing the commander to lift his head. At the sight of Wolffe's face, he couldn't have been happier, maybe with the other commander here, things will start to calm down. Wolffe was joined by his troopers as well, Sinker, Boost, Comet and Warthog. The pack was well known for their composure effectiveness and sometimes their.....PHUT!.....explosive anger.
Warthog had barely sat down when an empty yogurt pot came flying at his head, hitting him square in the head. His head snapped in the direction of a now terrified Dogma, the two staring one another down until Warthog suddenly sprung from his seat, chasing a now screaming Dogma from the mess hall, followed by Fives who had now found the culprit to the yogurt theft.
"Wolffe, I beg you, save me." Cody pleaded to his fellow commander.
Wolffe chuckled deeply, stabbing a piece of leathery meat with his fork and shoving it in his mouth. Deep down, he was highly amused by the situation, he and his vods had been watching the chaos from the lunch line, wanting to come and watch Cody suffer under the weight of the chaos.
"Sorry Cody, this just isn't my area of expertise." The 104th Commander apologised with fake sympathy, swallowing his mouthful.
"No, his area of expertise is ending up in general (Y/N)'s quarters." Sinker snickered from next to Boost.
Wolffe groaned and rolled his eyes as Sinker and Boost laughed, thinking of all the ways he could punish them for making that comment.
"Wait, (Y/N) and Wolffe?" Echo panted out, coming to a skidding stop, holding his side from a stitch. "pfft, would never have guessed...."
Before he could say anymore, he was suddenly tackled to the ground by Kix, the action surprising Waxer and Boil to the point where they tripped over the now wrestling 501st troopers, creating a clone dog pile.
"No idea where you are getting your information Sinker but Wolffe isn't my type." (Y/N) huffed from her spot, having recovered from her recent accident with Tup.
"Funny, that's not what you were screaming last night." Wolffe retaliated with a wolfish grin, amber eyes glinting with a mischievous look.
Cody choked on his food, Tup fell off his seat out of shock, laughing along with Sinker and boost who were in absolute hysterics while Comet just looked on in confusion, clearly oblivious to the conversation because of how focused he had been on his food.
"Funny, you were on the bottom, acting like a puppy getting all the love and attention he had been begging for hours to get." (Y/N) Sassed.
"Your such a pain in the ass." Wolffe grumbled, rolling his eyes again.
"No, I'm a sass in the ass."
"Dank Farrik! Can a man not eat in peace?! Can you all just shut up....for two...kriffing minutes." Cody exploded, finally having enough.
"By the sith Cody! You trying to throw hands? you don't have to be so rude about it, you could have asked us to stop." (Y/N) exclaimed.
And that was how Rex walked into the Mess hall to the most blinding sight, mashed potato straight to the face. The captain groaned and wiped the sloppy mess from his face, eyes going wide at the scene in front of him. Kix and Echo were wrestling on the floor, Waxer and Boil trying to pull them apart. Tup, Wolffe, Comet, Sinker, Boost and (Y/N) were all behind upturned tables, using them as cover as food was thrown their way, also throwing food from their positions. Dogma ran in front of him, still screaming as Warthog gained on him, shouting profanities. Jessie, who had been accompanying him, walked in after him and laughed at the scene before deciding he wanted a piece of the action before they were all caught and punished. But what shocked him the most, was seeing Cody standing in the middle of the madness on one of the tables, letting out war cries as he flung food left and right. Most of the other clones in the hall were either taking cover or retreating. Taking inspiration from them, Rex decided to slowly back out of the room and turn tail, pretending that he hadn't seen it, he was so not putting up with this shit today.