hi how do emotion?? idk i’m worse than v. also work is extremely stressful and i’ve been putting in extra hours so i don’t think i can properly fluff anymore lol rip
unedited free write 29/30
28/30 | 30/30
29. One year anniversary
v's cramming a mantis blade down a guy's throat when he sees the text notification pop up. he'd ignore it, just grab what he came here for and go if it were anyone else, but he can't resist immediately checking what kerry's sent. he yanks his blade free, sluicing blood everywhere, and opens the text.
[next week is one year! :*]
v blinks. "a year since what?" he checks the date, but no amount of squinting at it makes it any less cryptic. with a sigh, he sends a reply.
[dark matter, ya gonk!]
"oooh," v breathes, nodding slightly. the day kerry'd whisked him away to that fancy, empty balcony and hadn't even been brave enough to make the first move. the memory makes him smile. he steps over the bleeding corpse at his feet to take a seat on the stairs.
[been that long already? nova]
he fiddles with his phone absently, waiting for kerry to reply. it doesn't take long.
['nova'? that's all you have to say?]
[real fuckin romantic, v]
v's brow pinches.
[what's there to be romantic about?]
kerry's response is almost immediate.
[it's like our anniversary :>]
"fuck that," v says, offended. he'd spent too much time doggedly ignoring johnny's endless teasing to count that as their anniversary.
[no way is THAT our anniversary]
[what? think blowing up a van counts as a first date?]
well, as a matter of fact... but that's not the crux of the issue.
[nah, it doesn't count unless it's after mikoshi]
yeah, he'd been hooked nearly since the beginning, but he hadn't expected much to come of it. too focused on dying to dream about falling in love.
kerry's response takes longer this time. the wait settles in v's stomach like a brick.
[or after the crystal palace?]
v bites his lip, staring hard at the words. that's still fresh, kinda raw. they've neither of them really come to terms with it all. the way v'd left, his long absence, putting his life in the hands of experimental medicine, crawling back months later with a mostly clean bill of health. just because they understand what the other suffered, doesn't mean they've fully accepted it yet.
realistically, though, it probably would be the best place to put a pin in their relationship and call it the start. it's certainly the first point v stopped focusing on mitigating how much his death was going to hurt kerry and started focusing on being the person kerry deserved.
v swallows around the messy emotions tightening his throat. at least messages are easier than talking.
[in that case, we still have a lot of time to plan our first anniversary]
with one end of his phone pinched between his fingertips, he bounces the other end against his thigh.
[you think most couples have to negotiate the date of their first anniversary?]
that could almost be read as a joke, if there were any emoticons to go along with it. kerry's a fiend when he's not being serious.
he pauses, frozen. there are a lot of things he wants to tell kerry, but he can't bring himself to write them down. admitting to any of it makes panic seize his heart.
his last message is met with continued silence, so he knows he has to say something.
[didn't ever think you and me'd have an anniversary ker]
[figured i'd be dead by then]
it's the truth, just not the whole truth. he keeps going before he has a chance to think about it.
[i was scared of letting myself love you knowing it wasn't gonna last]
[it never lasts v. that's how these things go]
[yeah, i know i'm the fuck up here]
[cheesy as fuck, but you gotta embrace love whenever you get it. no matter how bad you know it's gonna end]
[and it will end, v. someday. whether we want it to or not]
v blinks to ease the burning in his eyes.
kerry's answer is quick.
[you coming home?]
v nods, even though kerry can't see him.
[yeah, need a couple minutes to finish this job, then i'll head home]
[good, i'm gonna kick your ass for being so fucking stupid]
[love you <3]
v shakes his head, snorting a laugh.
[love you too <3]