Clock Watcher
The future’s always coming
The past is always going
The present forges straight ahead
And, it will not be slowing
The future’s always coming
The past is always going
The present forges straight ahead
And, it will not be slowing
Everyone seems to be making plans,
Moving on,
Moving forward,
But me? I’m here, stuck in the hole
Trying to claw my way to the top,
Out of the mess I’ve made,
Out of the dark clouds,
Yet, I have no hope. Nothing at all.
I won’t be leaving this place,
Not today,
Not ever.
i am laying in a bed that is not mine
i am with a boy who is not mine
he is touching my boob which is mine
i do not want any of this to be mine
a group of men after a party
walk into the room
and they whisper
his hand is on her tit
i am rolling my eyes
laying away from them
i am scared of the men
i surround myself with
-i never felt safe for one second
Maybe I was Ikarus all along,
I’ve been flying way too close to the sun,
The sky and the stars are where I belong,
Now my wings are burnt.
Why are wards not empty?
And, prison yards so packed?
With no illness & no crime
People could relax
i need someone,
see me vulnerable l,
far away- standing still
getting to know me
as i pour in myself
for them to drink up
and spit it out
as soon as i go
i want them,
spitting me out
not to absorb me
keep me somewhere safe
i need someone
to break my heart-
make me a little less
of the human i am
for being a human
never let me be me
I look around, happiness and smiles
Where were these people when I was a child
I’m the happiest I’ve been in my entire life
The reality is, they are the family of my wife
I can pretend all I want, but a bastard I am
Loneliness is my life, I’m forever damned
It hurts to admit this because I love them so much
I feel wrong for giving them all my trust
My brain tells me not to get too attached
Because it will be heartbreaking if we have to detach
I must admit, my hearts been touched
They always take care of me, even supply the weed to my Dutch
The love doesn’t make us blood, I’m still alone on this side
I’ll never be more than an in law,and this makes me want to cry
I’ll still remain honest and loyal
Because they’ve done nothing but treat me royal
Although we’re not family, they treat me as so
As time passes by, maybe the love and trust will grow
Although we didn’t get along from the start
Blood means nothing, they’re family in my heart.
I look around, happiness and smiles
Where were these people when I was a child
I’m the happiest I’ve been in my entire life
The reality is, they are the family of my wife
I can pretend all I want, but a bastard I am
Loneliness is my life, I’m forever damned
It hurts to admit this because I love them so much
I feel wrong for giving them all my trust
My brain tells me not to get too attached
Because it will be heartbreaking if we have to detach
I must admit, my hearts been touched
They always take care of me, even supply the weed to my Dutch
The love doesn’t make us blood, I’m still alone on this side
I’ll never be more than an in law,and this makes me want to cry
I’ll still remain honest and loyal
Because they’ve done nothing but treat me royal
Although we’re not family, they treat me as so
As time passes by, maybe the love and trust will grow
Although we didn’t get along from the start
Blood means nothing, they’re family in my heart.
So many claim they can walk in my shoes
Constantly comparing, claiming to have been through my blues
They want so bad to take whats mines
Doubt that they could make it, through my hard times
They known nothing about having nowhere to go
Being broke and hungry, funds always low
Sleeping on ferries and trains, no bed to call mine
Crazy predicaments because my heart was way too kind
People think it’s easy, in this life I call a struggle
My head down low, my tears creating a puddle
Behind this big smile, there’s a story untold
Try to stay positive, in this world so cold
Raped as a child, all messed up in the head
Homicidal thoughts, so many deserve to be dead
Want to get away, so I just get high
My life gets worse, as hard as i try
Trying to keep from breaking down and giving up
I hope with gods will power, my life will be blessed with good luck
Thought she was my baby
But she’s acting shady lately
Hard to believe when she says she loves me
Guess I’ll never be the woman she wants me to be
It ends like this, over something so small
Thought I felt her love, but not at all
The words she spoke to me, were all lies
Nothing is good enough, as hard as I try
Tired of my heart being denied
I hate this feeling, how long do I cry
Can’t take this any longer, when will it get better
It probably won’t, so my goal is to forget her
When I’m with you, all I have is drowned thoughts
It’s time we had some storms
I’m swimming ‘til dawn
Con thoughts
Got more withdrawn
But I got more under
Drowning