#dear diary Tumblr posts

  • chirsu
    23.01.2022 - 12 minutes ago

    idk... games will introduce a father and a daughter, or a father and a wife and go "you know literally nothing about these characters" and then kill either the father, daughter, or wife and go "isn't this sad? don't you feel moved and motivated to play the game?"

    #she speaks#fallout 4 #the last of us #those are two games that i can think of at the moment where they give me someone that im meant to care about and then yank them away- #before i even get a moment to actually care for them #i understand the character im playings sadness but i feel like they're trying to invoke an emotional response and it just isn't working #dear diary #i do absolutely 100% feel like a monster for not feeling attached to characters suffering #don't get me wrong
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  • chirsu
    23.01.2022 - 1 hour ago

    Oh god im thinking about dnd so much I might have to turn my rv upside down for the goddamn tablet pen

    Some Ideas... I'm going to go for cartoon aesthetic... I'm currently listening to Ghost by Rob Cantor. I'm envisioning a comic that will probably never get made but I'm thinking about it...

    Mortimer, one of party members, is a dhampir who doesn't sleep... They don't reveal themselves as one so no one has any idea about it at first. He's mentioned staring blankly into the darkness, watching while everyone sleeps. So I feel like the first two lines would be good for that visual... Or at least, the scene where Dearly (america's sweetheart) is in the cart praying as Mortimer stares unfocused towards her direction without saying much of anything. Disappointed that the trio of heros aren't as heroic, rather they're flawed and hurting.

    The third line could transfer perspectives to Dom and Kethra at the front of the cart talking about the events that just took place. Dom (beloved halfling) asking Kethra (wet dog rat with pretty hair) how he managed to be okay with what's happening and still not being satisfied with his answer.

    Three lines for three characters

    Cause he doesn't wanna live and he don't wanna die - Kethra, hugging Dom looking absolutely exhausted. He don't wanna lose and he don't wanna try - Dom, looking down at the tattoo on his hand. He don't wanna stay but he don't wanna leave tonight - Mort looking at Dearly as she is praying.

    Like a true "lyricstuck," will include chorus... Considering the point in the campaign I'm starting, I think it would be appropriate to have Dearly during the chorus offering up her wings in order to retrieve a coin that is meant to release Olive from The Machine.

    Imagining an arcade machine and the light shining from the screen is so bright that you can only see the silhouettes of Dearly, Dom, Kethra, and Mort for the first line. Second line has Dearly looking upwards, into Olives bright glowing eyes, Dearly's expression looking grim and confused. Like she'd been betrayed. Third line is Dearly sitting outside the 711. She will look small in comparison. Sad and alone. House no longer a home.

    And revisiting the Pre-Chorus.... I guess I should explain this more based of how I think my character feels and how the others might feel. I say might because my interpretation of what's going on is always different from everyone else.

    When I say Kethra is the first line, I mean simply that he is depressed, tired, and feels alone. He feels like he can't emotionally depend on his party, and he is also struggling with the grief of cutting off the family he grew up with... Having no support system for this means he's going to act stupid and crazy and irresponsible because I like playing characters who can't manage their emotions even when it looks like they can at first (enduring pain does not mean you're managing anything!)

    Dom is the second line because he never wanted to be an adventurer. He's 30 and working in Safety Town and he was completely satisfied with being there. He feels like, since his family is known for it, that maybe it'll be special and he might live up to being a hero like the rest of the Richardsons. Dom didn't try a lot at first but he's gotten better at it since then.

    For the third line, Dearly feels like nobody in her party likes her or respects her feelings and opinions. She wants to leave the second she can, because she's struggling internally and thinks its everyone else's fault for that.

    I'm going to need to try and draw a fight for this chorus. Original Sin is attacking the boat and everyone is small to her. Mort attacks. Kethras eyes grow green with the power Olive gifted to him. Dom attacking with magic missile.

    Dearly looks at Mort as if he's betrayed her personally for being a member of the undead... And wanting to be seen and loved by the original sin, she paralyzes him.

    "He don't wanna live, he don't wanna die" as Kethra witnesses the strike that kills dearly, and then is given her body to hold "He don't wanna lose and he don't wanna try" as Dom holds the statue, clear that he is also sobbing "He don't wanna stay and he don't wanna leave tonight" Mort, who is hiding below deck, terrified. Completely unaware that Dearly had died.

    For the outro, I will probably show Dearly resurrected as undead. Kethra hugging her tight, relieved and happy, but still crying... Dom looking at her, knowing, that she'll hate him for this. And Amicus approaching them all, looking at her with a knowing look.

    #she speaks #i know the general area where it is but i guess which pen wrong the first time and got discouraged to the point of touchpad drawing in mspa #character limit be damned but mspa is still short for mspaint so whatever #dear diary#dnd
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  • chirsu
    23.01.2022 - 2 hours ago

    it is 4:20 am and you move to put your glasses on.... find out that one of the lens has not only fallen out, but the screw for that side is no longer screwing it together... so you sit there for 15 minutes using the goddamn micro screwdriver that you've been using to scrape weed out of your pipe fixing it...

    and when it works you go... "modern self reliance..."

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  • moonliaz
    23.01.2022 - 3 hours ago

    i‘m kinda proud of myself that i started to watch anime again (c: fruits basket season 2) and i finally started to read again!! (cr: air awakens // the atlas six)

    idk why i stopped but i’m glad i‘m picking my favorite hobbies back up.

    it makes me feel like i‘m becoming myself again. 🌷🍃

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  • leardord
    23.01.2022 - 3 hours ago

    My day, season 3 episode 4 - the one with the munchies

    Bought alot, but havent eaten well in a while so could almost not eat anything. A few bites of pizza an I was full lol. So now the ice cream has melted on my night standard and shit. Yeye. Drink it like a milkshake it is then.

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  • hermionesplants
    23.01.2022 - 3 hours ago

    You ever read a book and want to punch a character so bad?? I swear I would bitch slap this guy

    #dear diary #he can just fuck off
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  • leardord
    23.01.2022 - 4 hours ago

    My day, season 3 episode 3 - the one with the pinapple pizza

    Walked 2 min to the lokal "store and pizza place", payed more than 300kr / $33 for this lol. It's sooo pricy byt soooo close, so I guess it's worth it.

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  • prxmadxnna
    23.01.2022 - 6 hours ago

    I get why people are horrible. I get why people hold hatred. For themselves, or for others. It’s because they know that even the purest of souls get left behind too.

    07.27.21 / 2:11 AM

    - not art

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  • wonjaems
    23.01.2022 - 6 hours ago

    NEW THEME ⁉️⁉️

    #⎯⎯⎯ 🍚 . . dear rosie's diary ✷𓂅‎.゚
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  • prxmadxnna
    23.01.2022 - 6 hours ago

    if you think you’re the worst, don’t worry, there’s always worse than you. the world is uglier than you think.

    06.19.2019 / 7PM

    - not art

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  • ambientcoochie
    23.01.2022 - 7 hours ago

    My mantra at work for the next two+ months (until I can leave) is gonna be “I’m not getting paid enough to care about this”. Like I’m gonna do my job to the best of my abilities but I’m gonna force myself to not care about the extra stuff. I need to stop stressing about things that don’t matter.

    I’ve never really realized how much work stresses me out. I mean I know it does but it’s just wild when I think about it. The only times I feel good at work is when I am in control and know everything and do everything. But that’s also what makes me feel exhausted and burnt out. So in order to take care of my mental health I’m going to stop stressing about things that are above my pay grade. I do way too much work at this store and I should be getting paid more for it. But since I’m not, I’m not gonna do those things anymore. I no longer care about helping out my team. If they want that shit done they can get someone else to care about it. I like my coworkers and I’m not gonna purposely fuck them over but I’m also not gonna go out of my way to do their jobs for them.

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  • jocy-diaries
    23.01.2022 - 8 hours ago

    01.22.2022

    Ugh I hate that I’m not as excited for the weekend anymore? I have a full schedule, I’ve got no time for excitement. Therapy this morning~ Wonder how that’s gonna go.

    Therapy went okay. I feel like it’s helping me with the stupidest things that I’m just not able to figure out for myself, which is appreciated. I also think that maybe I should set up a meeting with my work friends… Like a monthly lunch. That could be nice and a good way to keep in touch. I almost don’t want to because I don’t want anyone to have that kind of connection to me, it feels like a bad idea for them and an opportunity for disappointment from me… But it’s a thought.

    I have so much stuff to do that I haven’t done and I feel so bad about it but there’s still so much to do and at this point I literally can’t. I’m so tired. I have all of these ideas and hopes but gosh where in the day can I act on them. I’m just. Tired.

    I love my library so much. When I used to work there it was definitely my place of power, and now that I volunteer there it’s like a sanctuary. I remember having a dream where I lived close to the library and became it’s keeper. I really hope I get to do something like that one day. Hoping for another place of power like this seems so impossible. And yet, I hope. It’s so full of lovely people too~ It’s nice to be welcomed.

    I LOVE THAT THE WHOLE OF HISTORY IS JUST RETELLING THE STORIES WE LOVE I love love that, it’s so wonderful. And if not retelling the stories we love then being inspired by them to create our own stories, like a Frankenstein’s creature of love rather than hubris.

    Session zero today with the Waterdeep campaign!! ・*\(^O^)/*・ I’m excited~ I think I’ve decided on going with Lynne, my wizard instead of a cleric. I can’t wait to meet everyone~ Okay after all that I *think* I might make Lynne a cleric after all. I didn’t realize wizards didn’t know Cure Wounds… I hope the DM is okay with that… But other than that it was a great first day! They’re all so nice and practiced it’s almost intimidating haha I just don’t want to mess up and I want to be useful.

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  • thelunarnaut
    23.01.2022 - 9 hours ago

    I will disappear many times. I’m sorry.

    #zooculture#escape plan #dear internet diary #thelunarnaut#music #people i know irl #Spotify
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  • mitskiesque
    23.01.2022 - 9 hours ago

    Those posts about why it’s bad to keep exotic animals as pets have made me realize I truly don’t know what ferrets look like. I keep misidentifying other animals as ferrets and thinking wow I didn’t know ferrets were bad to have as pets :( that’s so sad :( and the whole time it’s an otter

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  • juodojimirtis
    23.01.2022 - 9 hours ago

    Listening to black metal should probably be a better soundtrack to writing graphic sex scenes than power metal songs about Templars, but, for some reason, it is the other way around... guess I'll stick to bloodshed, ungodly rituals, gallant romance and so on when it comes to black metal.

    #writing#personal#dear diary#baltic demon#black metal #songs about templars... work best for sex scenes apparently
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  • cwazant
    23.01.2022 - 10 hours ago

    all these journals, yet i still have a lot of emotions bottled up

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  • augustdementhe
    23.01.2022 - 10 hours ago

    I do think I benefit from living alone, just the pandemic circumstances make it SEEM like it’s bad. 

    Keep having to remind myself how TERRIBLE of an idea it is for me to get pets. MAYBE a shrimp and betta tank. Maybe. 

    #Mint's Dear Diary #Not that I feel l can NEGLECT a fish tank #But shrimp won't chew  scratch or pee on my stuff...I think
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