I hate my life so much. Why I can’t just end it? I can’t handle it anymore. I’m so worthless. I care too much for people that don’t even ask me “how are you?”. They just think about themselves so it doesn’t matter If I’m not alive.
The amount of times I’m whispering to myself “I hate myself” or “I hate my life” or “I’m gonna kill myself” is scary. I’ve been paying attention and counted it… lemme just say: I hate myself :) lolxD
Anyways I made this
I don’t want to be skinny I want to be a skeleton
Oh great all I needed now was to fail my driving exam. Just cancel my life as well or something.
Things I’ve relapsed with
- self harm
- eating disorder
- I’m hearing voices again
- not sure if this counts but I’ve had a mental breakdown nearly every other day
I was meant to spend the day with my bf but last minute he decided to go training. At first I was mad but now I’m okay cuz that means I can fast today￼￼￼￼￼🥰
why? just tell me why. why would you throw away our friendship for an abusive manipulative immature fucking pedo. WHY?! WHY WOULD YOU LEAV EME ALL ALONE AHAIN FOR SOMEKNE WHO HURY ME MKRE THAN YOU COULD EVER KNKW?!?!? why? you left me alone, i hate being alone. you promised me you’d never leave. you promised me. why? you knew this would happen. you knew. you were my everything. YOU WETE MY ENTIRE FUCKING WORLD WHY WOULD YOU LEABE ME ALL ALONE AFTER SEVEN FUCKING YEARS YOU WERE MY LIFE YOU WERE THE REASON I WOKR UP J GAVE YOU EVERYTHJNB AND THIS IS WHAT YOU DO WITH IT?!!?!?!!!?!??!?! YOU WERE MY ROCK YOU WERE THE ONE I WENT TO WHEN MY HEART BREAKS YOU WERE THE ONLY PERSON I OULD TALK TO HOW AM I SUPPOSED TO HET THROUGH THIS WITHOUT UOU I NEED YOU it hurts so bad. but i don’t want you back. fuck you. i’m done. FUCK YOU FOR CHOOSING TL BE FRIENDS WITH MU ABUSIVE EX OVER ME. YOU HAVENG EBEM KNOWN HIM A FUCKINH YEAR. FUCK YOU FOR MAKING ME FEEL LIKE THIS WAS MY FAULT ITS NOT MY FUCKING FAULT YOU ASSHOLE YOU DID THIS. YOU MADE THOSE CHOICES. I HAD NOTHING TO FUCKING DO WITJ THAT. FUCK YOU FOR NOT TAKING RESPONSIBILITY AND FUCK YOU FOR BRINGING UP LIES I TOLD 4 FUCKING YEARS AGO WHEN J WAS TOXIC ASF. IVE GROWN SINFE THEN. IVE TRIED TO MAKE IT UP TO YOU EVERYDAY SINCE THEN. AND YOU STULL BRING IT UP EVERY ARGUMENT WE HAVE TO MAKE ME FEEL LIKE SHIT. YOURE NO BETTER THAN HIM. FUCK YOU
Haha my therapist is going to kill me.
my guy best friend who i am also in love with just chose his girlfriend over me and my friends :) i feel like i have nothing left to live for :)
I’m needed for my body. So you can survive. That’s the only reason my hearts still beating, when the rest of me is bleeding.
Every night I pray to god and the universe to take me back. I don’t belong here.
i’m finally crying but over something small because i bottle up my emotions for months
why I can’t just die and disappear from this world? everything will be a lot easier for everyone.
I’ll never be as broken and low as Gerard Way and somehow I’m sad and happy about it. Sometimes I want to slip into addiction, mainly painkillers n stuff, sometimes I’m eternally grateful to not be in that situation. I have to battle my demons all day, I’m doing stupid stuff to myself but there’s no day I don’t want to give up.
Y'all know the shit he’s been through and I refuse to ignore that. I know what I’ve been through and it shaped me. It shaped him and it’s our job to treat his past respectfully. Me saying I wish I’d suffer in a similar way is not disrespectful at all. I’m saying it from the perspective of a broken mind that just wants to cope and feel free for one fucking time. I’m not glorifying it. I don’t think it’s cool. It’s horrible and terrible and disgusting. But it’s also just another way to cope. And let’s be honest: there’s no way an ed is better than addiction. Just so we’re clear.
Amor de mi vida, me hieres. Has roto mi corazón y ahora me dejas.
nie piszemy ze sobą dwa dni. ona się izoluje i ja chyba też. ciągle sprawdzam czy coś dodała, a jeśli tak to co, ale nie piszę do niej. cisza między nami trwa dosłownie chwilę, ale mnie to boli. cholernie boli. dlatego nie chce jej przerywać. bo zasługuje na to jak cię czuję, zasługuję na ten ból.