Before ECQ (Extreme Community Quarantine) ENDS in 2 DAYS !
-Making Garlic rice, home made potato chips and tocino bbq *watevah*
Before ECQ (Extreme Community Quarantine) ENDS in 2 DAYS !
-Making Garlic rice, home made potato chips and tocino bbq *watevah*
I decided to go out to feel the hot summer sun before it’s gone. I barely feel any warmth from where I’m at except when drinking coffee.
Great news is that my body clock is slowly going back to normal. It has been a couple of days when I get a decent sleep in the evening. But a seven-hour nap during the day is still a thing. Though, oversleeping makes me really moody or sad or anxious or erratic so I’d rather not take a nap if I can. But nah, it’s hard to avoid. These days, I wake up only to go back to sleep. 😩
Anyway, I can’t complain.
There are four more days till June.
Where the hell is the line break
Days are reduced to only either dawn or dusk. What’s in between are bleak fragments of hazy moments. Moments that can not be entirely life changing as it is but a retrospect of memories and thoughts that make one realizes the importance of life as it was.
Yes, I damn well have so many realizations while being stuck in a place where I could literally only sleep, eat, repeat - it’s a different kind of prison.
It’s like getting stuck in a dark sticky mud or a quicksand you can’t escape. It’s a dark, lonely, ugly place. It’s like everything I did were regrets that are meant to break me. I was meant to fail. It feels like I couldn’t make anything better out of this life. I am a failure and I wouldnt think life would get better.
But on the bright side, if there’s any, i am at the mercy of hope. I still hope. I could only be in this place for a time. This is just a phase - a solitary moment of reprieve.
I see hope as a candlelight that burns indefinitely. As it burns fast, it provides the will to live, survive and move forward, but at the same time, it consumes the very reason to live.
I tried to be poetic but I always end up being a puta lol.
Low key kilig ako kanina I am so happy dahil I confirmed 2 na official friends!
Hahahaha para akong bata XD
And yes I’ve been dreaming of them since the quarantine.
Like i told you, I am fantasizing cuddling DreamGirl ainee and Waifu kira and this week is awsome.
First kira initiated a chat twice and she said she missed me 😍
Me i am a clingy mother flipper I am honest-gaypan-friend that i do miss them in the bottom of my heart. Online messages keeps me connected with her from time to time. But I don’t want to sound clingy so I also give them space to chat with others. Kapag palagi kasi akong available mabilis nila akong pagsasawaan. So I caht with her once or twice a week.
Then this girl came up.
She fucking suddenly misses me nung nagaway sila ni pashneyang patatsPaola. I was confused dahil sa story niya sinabi indirectly kung anong nangyari… She said na “when people treat you like they don’t care, believe them,” then continued to rant na she trusted her(potatPao) to take care of her but she really didn’t. (PotatPao is just verbal and not with actions so I don’t trust her words well) In my interpretation, gusto ni aimee na napaparamdam sa kanya yung atensyon at yung pagmamahal pero hindi niya nakita yung kay potatas.
Inside my mind i want to tell her na “I TOLD YOU NOT TO SPEND TIME WITH HER ANYMORE CAUSE SHES A DRAINING BITCH AND AN ENERGY STEALER SHE WONT MAKE YOU HAPPY ANYMORE LIKE DUH SHE’S LITERALLY LIVING NEGATIVE VIBE,” but that would look like that I am a villain and i have compassion kay Paola since I sense she is really depressed and needs medical help and I am not a doctor to monitor her mental health when I have my own sanity to look after. So I cut ties with her and set boundries. I am the dominant between the two of us or else I’ll be eaten alive. Hey and I still care just a little.
In the picture, she finally chats with me and says na she misses me more and my hugs. I am kinda little butt hurt at this but okay, i have her attention ahhaha. And I told her as well that if she needs to rant then I am here for her if she need help for ranting… and she did.
So weird na kapag may kailangan sila sa akin palagi ako nanaginip sa gabi XD. I rarely get dreams or nightmares nowadays. Anyway, i am glad that I helped her to ease her pain and distract her from overthinking. She needed a friend and I always will be the back-up for any help they need.
Even in this smol gestures are appreciated highkey for me. Aimee you have a special place in my heart as well as Kira and take my time, take my time if you need because when it rains, it touches everything. Don’t turn it to fire that will burn you down. I’ll be your calm ocean if you cry. So sleep well my girls.😘
It’s not that hot anymore because of the intermittent rains recently, but during the swelteringly humid days I was so envious of people who have their own swimming pools at home 🏊♀️ to stay cool because 😎
This time last year and usually every year around May 🤣 (two words: summer vacation) I would be on a trip vacationing somewhere 🌞 and so because of this year’s unusual circumstances I ended up coping with what I have at home 😁 thank you #ECQ 🙃 that’s technically the backstory of why I thought of having a “pool party” 😄 and at the back of my mind, I still have a bit of vanity in me and wanted to see who amongst my friends would “join” and celebrate with me 🥳
Just so you know I would push through with my pledge regardless of whether someone sent me a video greeting 😋
(at Las Piñas)
There was a time when everything seemed normal. People used to gather without masks on. Now every corner has been traded with barricades to limit us and frontliners to protect us.
One day, things will be different. Places will once again be full of people, roads will once again be filled with cars. But until then, we have to accept this new normal.
Keep your distance.
Stay at home.
And know that this, too, shall pass.
Here’s Itaru and Yuki judging you for your _____ ways during quarantine days. 😅
Sooo… i tried to go to work today but things happened and now I have to wait till the quarantine ends or at least is let up a bit more to actually go back….. Obvs I told my mom cos you know: update. maybe some reassurance. a ‘stay safe’ note or something
Instead I get a reminder of how much of a failure I am and how I’m such a waste of time, space, and money. Wasn’t even a long message. Like. 3 short sentences? Thanks mom. Love ya
On the last Friday before the community quarantine started, I didn’t think it would last this long. I didn’t even think to bring home my coffee and food supplies in my office pedestal because I thought (and hoped) that we would be back in the office in a month. We packed up our laptops and PC peripherals, said goodbye (for now) and see you in MS Teams instead. But weeks have gone by and the pandemic situation only worsens.
Days after the first extension of ECQ was decided, it finally hit me: we’re going to be here for a long time. As Eleanor Shellstrop would say:
The Great Wall of Denial and False Positivity can only hold up the front for so long anyway. I needed to admit to myself that everything that I am doing all this time (binge-watching Netflix series until 5 AM, reading books you name it) are just distractions to keep my anxiety at the bay. But I am still anxious. I am worried about my family back home especially my parents, my grandmother and my aunt who is taking care of her. They part of the vulnerable group from this virus. This is the longest time I’ve been away from home and I miss them very much. No amount of latte bought from online coffee shops can fill that void.
More than that, it is just some of the coping mechanisms to normalize the situation and to allow ourselves to slowly accept that this is the new normal. There is no life-before-ECQ to go back to, at least not in the next year or so. My friends had a conversation about how our travel plans this year would highly likely be postponed. So the only thing that all of us are looking forward to is for this pandemic to end.
But the thing about this new normal, even if we fully understand that we do this not just for ourselves and the people we care about and for others as well, is that it sucks. General Community Quarantine (GCQ) aka ‘the new normal’ is a hell lot more terrifying and frustrating situation. I know this sounds selfish but it hard to imagine settling in a normal life where I can’t hug the people I love and missed during the pandemic. This is a tiny sacrifice compared to the risks front liners had to take every single day. But the new normal— in the case of Philippines— implies another horrifying truth: you don’t have a choice because your government is corrupt and useless so suck it up.
I know this is just one of the hundred ways you can look at it and it’s extremely pessimistic one, but I am not frustrated for myself. I have a job that allows me to work safely and comfortably at home and continue to provide for my family.
There’s a post from Facebook that goes something like this: “you should know that the businesses are opening up again not because it is safe” and it says a lot about our current situation. I am frustrated for the people who don’t have a choice but to go back to work (if there is still a job to go back to) even if it’s risky and unsafe. I am frustrated for those who are barely making ends meet and those who have lost their livelihood because of the situation.
What’s more infuriating is that after more than two months of quarantine, we are being placed in GCQ without any clear plans from the government. No mass testing, no contract tracing, no clear guidelines for LGUs on the implementation and they have more than 275B Pesos of fund and emergency powers that only God-Knows-Where they fucking used for.
The idea of settling in to the normal is for the privileged, but for those who are in the other side of the spectrum, it’s just another steep mountain of suffering where they have to carry the weight of the world on their backs longer and harder, with a bit of luck wearing mask and protective gear, but nevertheless perilous and almost hopeless.
Legit pala talaga yung mga ex na ichachat ka dahil sa ECQ.
Pwedeng pakisarado na ang mga hospital at ilockdown na ang frontliners sa kanikanilang bahay? Kung pwede lang diba? KUNG PWEDE LANG DIBA? Another wave of Covid is coming for sure.
Well, hindi naman kasi pwedeng ilockdown ang mga tao sa bahay ng pagkatagal tagal, they need to go out! They need to go to mall and mingle with others. (No social distancing. Fck that!) at tuwang tuwa pa talaga ang karamihan dahil sa paglift ng ban. (GALA IS LIFE EVEN IF YOUR AND YOUR FAMILY’S LIFE IS AT STAKE.) Not knowing na Covid is just around the corner. HELLO! Walang mass testing sa pinas. Less confirm cases dahil iilan lang naman ba ang natest. And you should not be thankful for that. Ay. Ewan.
Okay, kailangan ilift ang ECQ pero sana diba, marunong sumunod lahat. Well, LAHAT KASI MAY NEEDS, MAY WILL AT MAY WANTS PERO HINDI LAHAT MAY THINKING.
I can’t help but to be angry for my colleagues. Tangina. Uwing uwi na sila at gustong gusto na nilang matapos ang pandemic na to. But looking at their undisciplined people, they will be heartbroken again for sure.
And I am devastated taht we still can’t go home! Fuuuuuucccccck! Why am I so angry? Because health workers in PH are dying and crying for cooperation and help but no one heed any attention, not even the fcking DOH! Is the USec a real doctor? Or he really don’t care about his people?
Now, wala na naman ako sa point ng thoughts ko. 😂 Well, I am praying for the frontliners, specially the health workers, for them to still have strength, patience and endurance of whats about to happen. Knowing they are already limited, many have fallen, and hospitals are not equipped well.
God Bless, Philippines!
homemade sweet corn
And yes it is extended but in modified type. The more the longer it takes the more we see and understand human behavior. Its quite fascinating to observe that even your own self get to be amaze and entertained. The more we understand the behavior we get more clueless of whats going to happen next. Breakdowns perhaps? Or some mishaps. Its like running in circles And sweating backwards. Who cares anyway. To soon we will see mire of it and will be more overwhelmed. And If you aren’t aware of it.. Congratulations.. Maybe you are just so busy doing things much larger than whats happening.
It just felt right to draw myself this way.
wild and free, #ecq #flowers #pandemic (at Metro Manila)
i’m worried for next week. full work force na ulit. kanya kanyang pagprotekta na lang sa mga sarili kasi hindi naman na talaga tayo matutulungan ng gobyernong ‘to. dalawang buwan ang quarantine pero all they are giving us are short term solutions. oo, andyan na yung ginagawa naman lahat ng government pero may kulang.
!!!!!!!!!! - iyan na lang. sobra yung thoughts na tumatakbo sa utak ko.
Choose to be happy. Choose to be hopeful. Choose to be motivated. Choose to be determined. Choose to be positive. Despite all of these challenges, despite of all the irritating things in life, choose the brighter side.
WHAT IF: WALANG COVID19 NGAYON. PERO MAY ISANG MASAYANG MOMENT OR IMPORTANTENG MOMENT SA LIFE MO ANG DAPAT MAWALA OR HINDI MANGYAYARI. ANO YUN?
The US government is forcing its people, especially minimim wagers, to go out to premature release of their lockdown. Some of these workers are threatened to be terminated if they don’t go to work, and some of them are forcing their employees to NOT WEAR Face mask.
Philippine scholars are adamant on EXTENDING the lockdown because according to their forecast, it would hit 10,000 if we don’t. And you know what, and you know what, THE GOVERNMENT ACTUALLY LISTENS. The government is trying its best to make us stay at home
(except the Ayuda line. Haha) and the only problem is the people who’s fighting authority because they are bored and hot.
I know we’re hitting 50 degree celsius here, but let’s be mindful of the reason of the lockdown. If you want to die, don’t include us. Stop lying down on your cushion and sit properly near your windows to feel fresh. Stay off from your phone and be present minded while surveying your house or whatever to avoid the boredom.
In US, some people are crying because they will need to work, but it could also mean they will die. Stop being whinny. Be thankful that your government listens to the experts.
And I’m not pro government or anti government. I’m just stating the facts here. If you think my statement makes sense, you are free to post it anywhere. Stay at home.