Not to. be that person. but sometimes I still think about the S3 finale and about how Eugene cheerfully praised Varian for hurting his dad (although I know technically he was relieved that Varian thought ahead but. the context does not fit) and eventually was forced to forgive Edmund at axe-point after being beaten up by him.
honestly, the lack of even barely hinted at disabled characters in star wars needs to be talked about. george’s eugenicist world building has been there since day one, with him only very recently allowing characters to have glasses because it was ‘unrealistic’ for vision problems to exist in the sw universe. the only prosthetics we see work exactly like and are completely indistinguishable from biological limbs (luke & anakin), with echo’s arm (which is literally a part of an astromech and left over from when he was tortured as a POW) being one of the very few other examples. the lack of disabilities present is almost always justified either by ‘lore realistic’ eugenics or because of laziness on the writing/casting front. it doesn’t matter if it is 19BBY, blind characters can exist! deaf characters characters can exist! characters with visible amputations exist! characters of all disabilities can exist! we have hundreds of species with different looks and diets and languages— we can sure as hell manage realistic portrayals of disabilities! the sci-fi setting should allow for the exploring of greater diversity, not be used as an easy eugenics flavored cop out
Stage Name: Morticus the Weeper
Name: Eugene Alloway
Age: 144 (died in his mid-thirties)
Birthday: January 26th, 1876
Circus/Carnival/Faire/Freak Show of Residence: Triumphs & Tragedies Freak Show
Homeland: Oxfordshire, England
Family (if applicable): Unmentioned (parents most likely died when he was young)
Persona Summary: Miserable, poetic (really leaning into the accent, huh?), everything is overdone and dramatic
Personality Summary: Gruff, dangerously passive, hopelessly pessimistic
Head Description: Heart-shaped face, deep set dark brown eyes, concave raised nose, messy coral brown hair (heavily gelled back for performances), has a massive necrotizing fasciitis mark on the right side of his face (starting at the hairline, curving around the eyebrow, following alongside the nose, following the cheek, over the lips and ending at the chin)
Body Description: Ivory coloured skin, bean pole shape, covered in necrotising fasciitis marks (DRAW A REFERENCE ‘CUZ, BY GOD, YOU’LL NEED IT)
Speech Patterns: Sentences often “break off” (ex. “She was hopelessly naive; had it coming!”, “You want me to—No.”, “Good morning; now goodbye!”) as if he’s trying to get his thoughts out all at once, Oxfordshire accent (leans into it when onstage)
Mannerisms Onstage: Sweeping, almost flowing, tends to keep the arms close to the chest, perfect posture
Mannerisms: Made a habit of keeping the arms close to the chest, always has perfect posture when walking now, heavy slouch when sitting
Clothing: White dress shirt with the cuffs unbuttoned, velvet green tailless waistcoat, caramel latte (by Benjamin Moore) coloured dress pants, gauze for his hands, black Jodhpur boot with velvet green-ish tint
Other: The necrotizing fasciitis was caused by alcohol abuse and childhood chicken pox, still drinks nightly (I’d probably be traumatized but you do you), as with most attractions in the Triumphs & Tragedies Freak Show he’s immortal (unless, y’know, shot or something—), spends most—not all!—of his off time in his tent drinking in his hammock
Oh, Rachel. That was out loud.
(Of course nobody hears and realizes "oh, Rachel called a wild animal by a human name, maybe there's something fishy going on here." How do these kids survive 50+ books?) CW: talk of real-world being suicidal and other mental health fun under the cut. It's a little raw. I am not good at letting things go and moving on with the story. Also, ableism discussion/eugenics mention.
…only three books in and already a character is trying to kill himself. Heavy.
As someone who’s been suicidal, that’s really not how it happened for me. (It… there is a difference between how it happens in pretend and how it happens in the world, and this strikes me more as imagined how suicide works than how actual suicide works. Like…one inciting incident, no space between impulse and action. (In a character who I don’t think has previously shown a lack of impulse control, at that.) But… I don’t really know, I’m just operating off of my own experience and a few of other people’s stories. And obviously I’ve heard more from people who considered suicide and lived than people who killed themselves fast.)
This story took a hard turn into “do not like”.
Yeah, this is also…when you imagine how you might react to something you’ve never experienced before, or at least when I do, emotional are static. They last for days, unchanging. This is how my mind works when I’m in a bad place emotionally: I imagine really bad things happening to a made-up version of me, and I can’t handle it, and I spend days in a funk. In real life, I can spend a while feeling bad, but it’s not just the same feeling or mental state for days on end. In real life, you get hungry, you need to pee, random things come up. So your mental states cycle too. And cycle based on your physical needs, things like eating and sleeping and showering. In your mind, imagining how you’d react to a thing, you don’t have the cycles of hungry/full etc. So things stay the same in a way that they don’t, they can’t, in reality.
I’m not saying that the problem is that the writing is unrealistic. Not exactly. I’m saying that the writing is following a very specific pattern that my own mind follows when I’m having mental health bullshit going on (I have killed myself many times in imagination and exactly zero times in real life), and I know it’s a mental thing and not just writing about something that could happen in the real world because that’s not how people’s mental states work in the real world. This is…I don’t have a word for this but since reading someone else’s transcription of that sort of mental state tends to set it off in my own head, if I had a word for it I would in fact want trigger warnings for this kind of thing.
This is my issue with Mercedes Lackey’s Heralds of Valdemar books by the way. I read them because she got what it’s like to be alone and sad and alienated, but also some of her writing really does this kind of thing and I don’t think it was good for me.
I don’t know that. Maybe my mind would have figured it out without the examples. Maybe whether it gets those models or not, I need to know how to deal with it more than I need to not get exposed to anything in particular. Regardless, getting the “here’s your brain on (depression or whatever)” modeling without any real “here’s what you do about it” was not good for me and it’s still not really something I want.
I’ve written this kind of thing too. When your mind’s doing it anyways, why not write it, you know?
I'm...trying to not judge Applegate for this, but I'm also hella judging Applegate for it.
I think Tobias wants to not live and he’s using the turning into a hawk thing as an excuse to not live. I’m not judging. Kid’s had a rough life and wanting to escape is understandable. But I don’t think he’s losing it because he’s a hawk. I think he was already losing it and is using the hawk thing as a sort of rationalization for the escapism. Permission to let his human self sleep.
And if you’re writing, this is how you get out of it. You have some external thing (something that has nothing to do with internal physical or emotional states) change, because of course everyone’s emotional state is static until something external causes it to change. (sarcasm.) Do Not Like.
If I was a hawk, I too would fly around shouting “Tseeer!” all the time.
I guess if you have to do that thing, “snapping out of it when someone else’s life is in danger” is as good a rationalization as any.
This is not how people’s emotions actually work.
(This matters because one way this mind-pattern manifests is predicting the future. “If this happens, I will never recover.” Picturing exactly how it will feel. It’s important to understand that while that mind-pattern is emotionally compelling, it’s not reality. Should the feared scenario actually happen, most likely your emotional response will actually be quite different.) (Specifically this matters because I think this is one thing abled people really don't get about disability. When you become disabled, it sucks for a while, and then you get through the initial suck and your hedonic treadmill resets. Your emotional baseline resets, because feelings are more about "is my life getting better or worse, as far as I can tell?" than about "how good or bad overall is my life?" I don't know if that's true for literally every human being who's ever become disabled, but it's true a lot of the time. When abled people imagine themselves as disabled, they imagine the initial suckitude and they imagine that going on indefinitely, without the reset, because when you imagine things your emotional state is static in a way that it isn't in real life. Which leads to abled people drastically underestimating disabled people's quality of life. Imagining how they would experience things if they were disabled in that way and getting it wrong. Which in some cases leads to abled people fucking killing disabled people.) (I was tracking my mood before I got sick with CFS/ME, so I happen to know, for a fact, that my mood actually bounced back to a bit better than it was before I got sick within a year. I absolutely would not have anticipated that either before I got sick, or at my emotional low point after I got sick. Anecdotally, this seems like a pretty typical experience for people who become disabled. There's a rough period, but it doesn't last forever.) (And, I mean, it's not like it's never been rough since. It might be kind of like mourning a loved one, where the grief comes up less often and less intensely over time, but you still get hit hard now and then.)
When I get into that sort of mind pattern (two paragraphs up, not one paragraph up) …I’ve had mixed results trying to pull myself out. If I try to change the scenario in my head, it doesn’t work, it just gravitates back towards awful no matter what. One thing that kind of works sometimes is pulling myself out by focusing on physical sensations — breath, for instance, feeling my body. Another thing that kinda works is trying to use my Arsenal (my mental health tool-kit) in the imagined scenerio, which is a little weird but kinda neat. Sometimes I just let it happen like I’m watching a movie and let it run its course, pay attention, and maybe later when I’ve gotten out of it look and see if there’s any sort of knowledge I gained about myself — what’s important to me, for instance. “She (Rachel) was reading a book in bed” bet it’s for fun, not an assignment. Bet these kids have way less homework than I did in, say, eighth grade.
I think at some point the average homework load for kids in the like 8-12th grade range went through the roof, but most adults assumed it stayed the same as when they were that age and just do not get how much more homework the Kids These Days have. “Rachel thought about that for a moment. ‘The Yeerks and their slaves aren’t killing to eat,’ she said. ‘They are killing to control and dominate.’” Rachel’s got a good head on her shoulders. There is a difference between killing to live and domination.
(Which is not to say that one’s natural and the other isn’t. I’m not sure it’s actually possible to create a self-consistent cross-species ethics, that ethics can be based on something other than “these things are good for us and these things are not good for us.”) (And what if the Yeerks do actually see what they’re doing as connected to their own survival? idk. Sometimes that’s excuse and lies. But Yeerks apparently are natural parasites. So you can’t just say “being a parasite is bad” without also declaring an awful lot of natural species to also be bad.) “There are human beings all over, trapped in bodies controlled by Yeerks. Trapped. Unable to escape. Rachel, I know how they feel.” No. Bad. Not the same.
“Not grizzlies,” Cassie interrupted. “Not in this area.”
That doesn’t narrow it down much, but black bear range does.
Maybe not much more than the existence of mountains though.
Do none of these children have a tent (have parents who have a tent?) Speaking of, what do their parents think they’re doing?
I wish the others would be chill about the idea of Tobias eating mice. It’s not even that gross. Some people eat bugs. Mice are like small chickens. Or rabbits. Small rabbits.
Fish morph fish morph fish morph fish morph
Wait, what are they planning on doing after they get sucked into the Yeerk ship?
Great, now everyone’s being weird about eating trout.
“But people are funny — they never think something bad will happen to them.” Indeed.
Yeah, no, that makes sense. Tobias is worried about his friends. But he’s also worried about himself. They’re his only link to humanity. If he loses them, he’s not going to come back. He’s going to be like the Hulk on, uh, Sakaar. In Thor Ragnarok.
They did not do that concept justice, by the way. It shouldn’t have felt good when Banner turned back into the Hulk. It should have been terrifying. Bleh. Foreshadowing of how they handled Thor’s issues in Infinity War/Endgame. ‘It felt like someone was hanging a small moon over your head.” That’s no moon.
(Sorry. I had to.) Why is there only one Andalite controller? I mean, I realize it’s great for drama, but what’s the in-universe reason? Visser Three just killed Elfangor, there wasn’t any attempt to take him over. But he was also threatening to yeerkify his family. So it sounds like Yeerks think other Andalites can be controlled. So why aren’t they trying to capture more of them alive?
Cassie’s upset that they vaporized a deer. That’s adorable.
Yeah, there’s probably no way to make morphing into a fish look good.
Oh that can not be pleasant.
(Edit: I... think I meant getting picked up by hawk-Tobias as a fish. Or morphing into a fish out of water. Or both.)
That’s very risky considering they just vaporized a deer.
Good thing the Hork-Bajir didn’t notice that the hawk with a fish was flying towards the water, which totally makes sense.
Tobias’ tail is having a hard time.
I’m weirdly glad they’re enjoying being fish.
Oh, they probably can’t fire Dracon beams in the ship. Too likely to destroy the ship itself. Well that’s a relief anyways.
You know what would be really cool? If at some point Visser Three morphs into some appalling monster and swallows one of the Animorphs whole and still alive, like lizard-Jake swallowing the spider, and then they morph into something really big and bust his body open. That would be cool.
Very in keeping with the series’ aesthetic too.
All right, let’s see if I can plough through to the finish tonight.
Oh, I think I’ve figured out “the encounter”. It’s playing with “close encounters”, hinting at the space ship.
These are not inspired titles.
“It was one of the terrible things about our battle against the Yeerks. See, our enemy was just the Yeerk slug that lived in the heads of Controllers. That Hork-Bajir may have been made a Controller totally against his will. He had lost his freedom to the Yeerk in his head. Now, he was about to lose his life, for something that he had no real control over.”
Indeed. I have no (control over my) mouth and yet I must scream.
Oh no, Tobias’s hawk beloved is in danger!
(Hey, bonding is bonding.)
Smart Tobias. (Landing on the ship so they can’t fire at him.)
And you thought the fish were going to be in danger.
Problem is if he stays put they’ll just find another way to kill him.
What is with Visser Three’s mindspeak “resistance is futile” vibes?
Yeah, not that surprising the plan is not going well, it was a terrible plan.
Very high drama.
Freedom’s just another word for nothing left to lose.
Welp, I guess that’s the end of the series then.
yeah, they’re not going to be able to do one of their two minute morphs before hitting the ground.
oh come on.
The internet says a fall of 700 feet should take about 6 and a half seconds.
No. I’m sorry. You can’t have morphs that take two minutes and also grow long enough wings to fly (and get small enough to fly) in one twentieth that time. Not possible. Do some math.
Ok, well, surely they got identified as humans this time anyways. Right?
I do not possess enough suspension of disbelief for this story.
Noooooo not the hawk!!!!!!!
That was the weirdest fucking love triangle ever.
OK I got to admit, destroying the manta ray ship was a really spectacular victory on the kids’ part. Even if they didn’t reveal it to the world as planned. Good win.
OK, Tobias is accepting that he’s human and a hawk. Good. Tobias stuck in hawk morph as symbolic of being between two worlds, not fully belonging to either.
So…I guess ending on “Be happy for me, and for all who fly free” means he’s decided he’s not trapped? Is a refutation of the idea that his condition is analogous to being Yeerk controlled?
That happened rather quickly and I’m not entirely sure how he got there (especially since the death of the female hawk plus him essentially telling Rachel he loved her, should symbolize him choosing his human side), but good, I guess? Still no Ax.
Tickletober Day 3 - Kisses
((Tickletober list used!))
((Click/tap on pic for better quality!))
((Reblogs give me ❤Motivation and Serotonin💙))
AAAAAAA THEM THEM THEM THEM THEMMMMMM!! FINALLY I was able to draw another few of my RH OCs! Most especially two of the ones I've been talking about a lot a while back.
The red one is Eugene, aka the gay himbo barista. And the blue one is Casey, aka the stressed out bisexual call center agent. Ajakfhshdhs-
So basically- the two decided to hang out at Casey's apartment after their part time jobs. Eugene saw how his boyfriend was feeling a little under the weather, so he wanted to cheer him up and maybe give him a little reward for his hardwork and perseverance to surprisingly not lose his sht at work akfjajfhsj-
Hahhsjsjfhsjdhsj I need to draw more of them in the future ;-;
Reddit is so goddamn stupid and steeped in eugenics ideas LIKE what the FUCK ARE YOU TALKJNG ABOUT i didnt get the funny gene just like i didnt get the gay gene or the trans brain or whatever i made myself gay and trans and funny by having a mullet
dni if you compare the modern day like, political climate, to the movie idiocracy /srs
why is gender neutral jewelry and clothing so expensive i *swings at the air violently*
I hate those posts of abled people who think they just unlocked some deep conspiracy
The ones that are like "how come you never see [Type of disabled people] in pictures from [whatever period they're learning about in history class or saw in a documentary or what have you] 🤔🤔🤔"
They always treat it like it's some big mystery, it's never to actually point out disability erasure
Like, they were there dude, disabled people have been around since people have been around
9 times out of 10 the answer you're looking for is "because of eugenics"
Filtering out jack black content now bc. The pedestal hes been placed on is so much more obvious now that i know that fuck supports autism $peaks and aba shit
This post is gonna be the end of me.
Especially how it misrepresents the leftist anti-psychiatry and Mad movement’s premise based on what random people on twitter -that OP used as an example in an additional explanation last time this was circulating- say off the cuff while using decontextualized words of the movement. With how it critiques leftists and the Mad that say the categories and epistemology of mental illness and mental wellness along with their surrounding implications, violent treatment, & othering is currently heavily influenced by capitalism - by basing the meaning of this statement on those twitter users in question that don’t know what the phrases they say even mean.
(The phrase “mental illness is a social phenomenon” isn’t supposed to mean “mental illness, symptoms wise, is caused only by capitalism, so if we abolish capitalism then there will be no ‘mentally ill people’ in the sense of any symptoms”, but is supposed to instead mean “the meaning of, treatment of, and labeling of mental illness; including the word ‘mental illness’, is heavily defined by capitalism, of which includes the psychiatric institution, and the norms it enforces. Regardless of the pre-existence of ‘mental illness symptoms’ prior to capitalism, it’s meaning is informed now by our current system and the dehumanized violence it enforces. This form of categorization with it’s otherizing purpose with relation to neurodiversity and ‘madness’ is not an objective reality that should be upholded and left unquestioned.”)
I won’t claim to be very learned or smart, but it does have me wincing since it isn’t engaging with the actual meaning of it well and takes it literally, just because some people on twitter were being weird as per usual while using activist language like with any other political movement.
Like, yes, if those words are being used to erase mental and physical disability and struggle, while ignoring our existence, then it is bad.
But if some rando on twitter or tumblr says, for example, “disability is a social construct” and “social construct means it is not real”, I would hope we can see what the oversimplification of this would create. That it doesn’t necessarily mean that “disability is a social construct” as a statement or saying it is wrong, but that the person explaining it doesn’t know what they’re saying and can even say harmful things because of barely understanding the original meaning or co-opting the language for their own means.
(Side note: When I criticized this on my own posts last time, a self-described white aspie went on multiple of my posts to claim I wasn’t disabled nor autistic, and that I was a bigot for also saying to not harass nonverbal and high support needs autistic people just for describing themselves as “low functioning”, along with other things. Which was weird.)
Be careful with your futurism aesthetics. Biological transhumanism comes very close to eugenics. Mechanical augmentation is often ableist.
If you are using these as subtractive tools, rather than additive; you are actually limiting the human race.
Do not destroy the struggles of existing people with limited worldview. Futurism should always be inclusive, optimistic, and progressive.
full stop the vaccine should be mandatory. I do not fucking care. I literally don't. as a disabled person. I do not fucking care, on so many levels. other levels aside, hot take? Yall dont want to do something because it's uncomfortable for you? Because its painful and can make you sick? Because you don't think its important? But you have to regardless to participate in society?
Poor little meow meow. Must be so hard for you :(
“I’m sorry I called you a brat.” “He just... fell.” ... “But you didn’t.”
When you need a hug when you and your brother almost mcfreakin died.
Hey, did I mention that vaguenotion’s fics are the best? Yeah, i’m not done with them. This is from The Before and After (my fave finished). From a great chapter. What happened? Idk, you might have to read it. :)c
alright, one small summary of my opinion on aot so my jewish followers in particular don't worry: i have watched the series worried i would find it full of antisemitic or pro-nazi tells, since i had heard about the controversies. i was ready to drop it at any second.
however, from the understanding i have of the series, i can only cringe at how carelessly isayama handled the comparison to the jewish population at times (a proven biological basis to cultural-religious discrimination? yeeeeesh); i haven't found reason to believe he isn't solidly on the eldians' side. as for the power of genetics, i can only say that the series seems to be going in the direction of condemnation of purity and eugenics, though i would have to know spoilers i do not want beforehand to form a complete opinion. it's obvious that the group following eren in s4 (s5 if you follow the netflix division) is not who we're meant to side with, and if we were to blame the piece of media for its misinterpretations we should also condemn movies like fight club. lastly, i have no real opinion and no real info on the use of names of japanese imperialists from ww2. i plan on doing a bit of research on it, but honestly atm i need to study.
i didn't talk about everything ofc (it would take too much to talk about my complex feelings on the characterization of military power in aot here), but this should cover most bases. i will keep watching with caution.
am i completely wrong? did i overlook something important? if you have a proper analysis or pieces of info to consider i will gladly read them: i post this partially bc i want to be sure i'm making the right call in forgiving the series as well-intentioned but somewhat clumsy. if you just want to yell at me please don't, we can cohexist even if we have different opinions on one anime
Tagged by @huntercombe — thank you!
Rules: Share the titles of each of your current WIPs and if your followers ask, share a preview of the one that sounds the most interesting. [Not publicly sharing material from the Onegin translation itself at this point in time, sorry! And other parts of the project can be a little harder to share without context. I’m always happy to talk about my research, though!] Send this on to some mutuals who you are curious about what they’re working on.
I did a bunch of re-formatting, re-indexing, and other housekeeping in my project last weekend, so this is good timing to ramble about the current state of things! :)
For the past three years, I have been working on a passion project that started out as a translation of Onegin, and has since evolved into a lot of other things. The project as a whole is titled Materials toward a translation of Yevgeny Onegin — sort of a riff on the name of one of the first biographies of Pushkin, P. V. Annenkov’s Materials toward a biography of A. S. Pushkin [Материалы для биографии А. С. Пушкина, 1855]. In addition to the Onegin translation itself, my project is also a gathering of materials that have informed my approach to this work, and that give a window into the world in which Onegin was written.
My work is divided into three volumes:
Vol.1: Yevgeny Onegin — My translation of the published Onegin, plus discarded materials (the surviving fragments of the two discarded chapters, discarded stanzas from the published chapters), and some additional Onegin-adjacent poetry content (the original preface to Ch.1, the poem Pushkin wrote the night he finished Ch.8, his snarky responses to friends who kept pestering him for a sequel, etc.). This volume is *mostly* complete. One of the discarded chapters needs more footnotes, and I have one significant side translation still in progress for the Other Related Materials.
Vol.2: The novel in letters — A “found novel” compiled (and translated) from surviving personal correspondence among Pushkin and his contemporaries. I first started poking around in Pushkin’s letters because I was curious about contemporary reactions to Onegin. What were people saying about it when it was still being published chapter-by-chapter, and even Pushkin himself didn’t know what would happen next? Pretty soon it became clear that the letters were interesting in a lot of other ways, too. They give vivid insight into the early 19th-c. Russian literary scene, the shape of Pushkin’s creative life, what was going on around him while he worked on his novel, and the bits of reality that would end up reflected in his work.
In addition to working with Pushkin’s own letters, I’ve also done a huge amount of research into other archives of letters between his contemporaries, to add richness to my tapestry. (The other day I started sketching out a proper bibliography, and was kind of boggled to realize just how many sources I’ve been working from.) In its current state, the “novel in letters” is looking more like a broader biography of Pushkin — but perhaps one of my underlying theses is still, in a way, that Onegin, more than any of Pushkin’s other works, would go on to cast a long shadow across his whole timeline.
This part of the project has been my main focus since mid-February (when I finished translating the last stanzas of Onegin). It has evolved a lot since then. I keep reminding myself: listen to the material, trust the material, let it find its own shape.
Vol.3: Experiments and explorations — Other side work. This volume has three sections: 1) a collection of stories translated from contemporary memoirs, 2) a collection of poetry (side translations of other things from Pushkin’s canon, original poetry reacting to the material I’m working with and commenting on the translation process), and 3) some original work briefly exploring a few things that *might* have happened next after the events of the novel.
Everything in this volume is still in progress. The first section is mostly done: I’ve identified one or two more memoir excerpts I want to translate, some footnotes need to be tidied up, I’ve got a pretty good indexing system established. The second section will be ongoing for as long I’m working on other parts of the project — it’s my diary/scrapbook. The third section will be more of a focus later. For now, I’ve got the basic concepts sketched out, and a few early stanzas that I may or may not end up keeping.
…This got a bit long, so I’m hesitant to tag people. If you see this and want to do the meme, consider yourself tagged!
just saw someone claim to be anprim on this site
folks, if you have a social media account, you are by definition not anarcho-primitivist. you are actively using some of the most modern technology available.