#focus Tumblr posts

  • strcngered
    27.07.2021 - 32 minutes ago

    too many thoughts, gotta vent-

    I know I put up a very good ‘tough young person with disability’ front, but it is a poorly made facade at best. Yes, I’m trying to make the best of a bad situation, but being in pain all the time is so very hard. Being in pain all the time, always being aware of its presence in your body, is scary. My joints haven’t gotten particularly worse in two years but they hurt all the time. I can’t bend forward too suddenly without it hurting, can’t move my right shoulder without it cracking, wore down my retainer so my jaw is clicking again. It’s very difficult for me to be warm but so incredibly easy for my body to get cold. Walking hurts a lot of the time too.

    I don’t talk about the details of my illness frequently because I know most people don’t have any clue there’s anything wrong with my body. I didn’t even tell my job I had shingles, I worked through it. But I know I can’t take it back once I tell any of the supervisors, and I don’t want them to start treating me differently. I don’t want anyone to start treating me differently. And I especially don’t want to be pitied, it wounds me whenever I notice people starting to view me as a pitiful creature and it makes me feel incredibly pathetic.

    I rarely say this out loud. But I hate being disabled. A lot.

    #( ooc. ) #vent // #internalised ableism // #negative // #chronic illness // #tbd #it is uuuuuh not a good night to be in my brain #I haven't cried about this particular aspect of my life in a couple years and it's not cute #but god just #the comprehension of how shitty your body and illness is crushing #I try not to think about it #I've bitterly accepted it but I avoid putting focus on it #buuuuut that's not the case tonight #I had to get this all out somewhere and it was either here or facebook #and for obvious reasons that wasnt happening #Im not gonna leave this up long but I needed to get the thoughts out before it overwhelmed me #this shit sucks #dont recommend it
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  • bakuraryxu
    27.07.2021 - 47 minutes ago

    hi these dogs are so beautiful im going to weep more stunning pics in source

    #big boy front right looks like a lion. the focus. the power. holy fuck im in love #lmaoooooo yes i was browsing the gsd club website for puppy listings #unfortunately there are none in my state <./3
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  • girlbosslrell
    27.07.2021 - 47 minutes ago

    i feel like i need to rewatch all of voy (up to where i’m at on the second season) because i forget literally all of it and it’s SO GOOD, i don’t want to forget

    #some of that is my fault for literally Not paying attention as i was watching #but that was because i was burnt out from school okay i couldn't focus on anything! #i just put my little space tv show on and zoned tf out #tbd
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  • olichat
    27.07.2021 - 1 hour ago

    *casually eating chicken drumsticks off-camera while my lecture explains everything there is to know about the anatomy of a penis*

    #saying i have a literal attention span of a goldfish is an understatement #and an insult to golfish #i can give my complete and unwavering focus for about 10 minutes #its almost 2 hours #and suddenly #p e n i s
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  • icanthearyoufromhereplease
    27.07.2021 - 1 hour ago

    Ok, let me say this, I am not really surprised but still surprised. Ok, here is my receipt, I think there was a time I told someone on here (can't remember but pretty sure it's my bae @jade-marie ) that I find Mae thanking Reno for the face masks a bit shady. The way she phrased her post had seemed extremely shady. That was when they were still filming season 4 and I have had my eyes and ears out for her since then. But then I thought, maybe it's nothing, maybe I am just overreacting but turns out I wasn't. Not a good situation but I still feel good about being right.

    I just hope Manny doesn't say a word.

    #if i say white women they gonna say why are you bringing up race now #or see they are using the race card #but really white women #pretty sure the positivity police on here are not gonna say pimp #there is something controversial i have been meaning to address on here as well but i have got the cool gays #so i am gonna have to stay mute but the way my radar is radaring right now #imagine waking up praying to lord jesus to be a good human today #and here I come to tumblr and i have got bitches on here already testing my faith #begone demons #oh i swear let me focus on my job today will find ways to come bounce on this later #and you Mae!!!!!! #later
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  • jbeansdraws
    27.07.2021 - 1 hour ago

    Instead of working on a project that’s due soon I made this 👅

    #art#digital art#star wars#thrawn #grand admiral thrawn #mitth’raw’nuruodo #this was originally just the quickest of sketches but I don’t know how to leave things as they are #I don’t get to choose what I focus on my brain sees a tweet and goes feral #I imagine Eli taught him this and he’s directing this one at Ar’alani #bc he’s petty and they’re siblings #included the sketch because I kind of like it #sketch #LOL I just realized I forgot to colour the tops of the pens
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  • sharky857
    27.07.2021 - 1 hour ago

    - Me, walking past a Candidate with a future Flux Rifle: "Pls don't. I'm just trying to farm for Protea's last BP."

    - RNG, eyes going big: "You REJECT Sister? You IGNORE her like the bag of trash? Oh, oh! Stronger temptation for Tenno! STRONGER temptation by a thousandfold!"

    - The Sister in the run right after:

    #warframe #sharky's stunning skills at gaming #well... I couldn't really say no to a Sis with a Tenet Arca Plasmor. :°) #And dat sweet-sweet 56% of bonus fire damage #and dat even sweeter-sweeter ephemera #(Oh. And I also got the final BP for Protea so I can finally feed this incoming ''copy'' the the Helminth) #(And probably go back to focus on the Liches afterwards)
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  • flowerkindling
    27.07.2021 - 1 hour ago

    however i will say i wish there was more explicit bisexuality in the series from ppl other than just kaede and maybe robara bc well.....the "all consuming bisexual" trope is a thing. i mean inari also fits the archetype but she has no interest in anybody so that balances it out a little i guess

    #it seems like there might be a hint of it with umetaro? and hes pretty normal #idk relationships arent really the focus of the series
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  • verelis
    27.07.2021 - 1 hour ago

    Kind of want a new url, I mean when I created this blog just using her name was actually only supposed to be a placeholder until I thought of something better anyways but I have no idea what else would make sense

    #ooc #why am i even thinking about this #when i haven't done a reply in weeks and her bio page is literally gone #fucking. hell brain #can't it focus in something useful? #it's just that most of my other muses have one that's like. meaningful to their characters somehow? #if that makes sense?
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  • knell-guapo
    27.07.2021 - 1 hour ago

    I can't write anymore because I can't be alone with myself long enough to create anything worthwhile

    I get frustrated and immediately spiral into self loathing

    #i can't focus #everything spirals downwards #it's probably just anxiety #i keep a brave face on #I'm leaving the place I've called home for most of my life #to drive across the fucking country #with almost no money #what am i doing #I've been priced out of my home anyway #I'm about to start from scratch #like i have this ridiculous belief in myself #that i have greatness within me #like I'm just going to make it work out #I'm going to exceed all expectations and reach all my potential #and then #in moments of brutal honesty #i remind myself that #all of those are called #delusions of grandeur
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  • teacherdoms
    27.07.2021 - 1 hour ago

    #focus (at 犬山駅) https://www.instagram.com/p/CR0hI8RAK4x/?utm_medium=tumblr

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  • frecklydork
    27.07.2021 - 2 hours ago

    I know so much about Starscream’s bounty hunters now because I’ve done so much research for my AU,,, and,,, hhh Shadelock... is kinda nice to look at... 

    ANYWAY I like thinking about how when my s/i shows up and they board the ship, Starscream orders his crew “alright leave us in peace now” bc he’s gotta make up for like seven years of lost time and he can’t be out here lookin VULNERABLE and teary-eyed in front of these other Cons,,, but they just kind of stand there staring because. whoa. that’s the keri? that’s the human?? the one they’ve been searching for this wholeass time?? so cybertron’s legend was true, all those years ago this one little plain-looking organic with spots on her skin is the one who conquered the hearts of all autobots AND decepticons including the infamous leader, lord megatron himself??? what the frag there’s nothing special about her--

    so they just keep staring at her while starscream’s back is turned and he’s muttering “I don’t hear the door opening...” and without looking up he calls “I’m going to count to three, and if you’re still there when I turn around, I’ll gut you like I would gut an Autobot. One. Two--” and the crew scatters and immediately leaves. Starscream’s tough attitude drops entirely when the door shuts and he just sighs into Keri’s shoulder and hugs her tighter and mumbles “it’s their first time seeing a human up close, they’ll get used to it. now please hold me i’ve missed you so much”

    but I am fond of the idea of the bounty hunters just kind of standing afar, in other scenes, staring at her. and she just turns her head and smiles at them real bright and they’re like “huh.” and bumblebee pulls her aside and says “no keri. please stop romancing every single robot you lay your eyes upon. these are bad guys. i know you have a soft spot for the bad guys but this is dangerous” too late babe she’s already got roughedge’s comm link number in her cell phone ✨

    #im sappy i want a hug from a big scary robot. #woof#love notes #saving starlight AU #💕 Everything I did to get to you 🌟🌸 #the AU doesnt focus much on the bounty hunters anyway #or any other characters besides starscream himself #when she reunites w/ bee and optimus she IS very loving and theres kisses and stuff #because they're like WE THOUGHT YOU DIED??? #and stsc taunts in the background 'I SURE DIDN'T. AND LOOK WHO FOUND HER' #and shes like well actually i fell from the sky and he interrupts NO I FOUND HER. #TAKE THAT YOU AUTO... BUTTS #everyone who doesnt know fully what this AU is is like 'what the fuck is keri talking about' #dont worry i have no idea either im just rambling bc i need to distract myself <3
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  • valentinicvamp
    27.07.2021 - 3 hours ago

    me: im gonna try to do this stupid video and work hard and be productive

    me not even a min later:

    #shut up i know im 3 minutes in #in a sad case of irony this is actually making me focus simply bc gangsta's paradise is one of those songs that Scratches The Brain Itch
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  • cinewhore
    27.07.2021 - 3 hours ago

    Tonight we cry about not doing enough and then tomorrow we pretend it never happened

    #i want to do too much #and I’m not appreciating the fact that I’ve done more than enough and is currently continuing to do so #like girl#RELAX #this is not a fucking race #you will have your time #so stop it #god i can’t wait until my new podcast episode release and then i kiss social media goodbye for a week or two #i need to step back and focus on my shit #I’ve written award winning things #I’ve had Hollywood producers and writers tell me how good i am #now is not the time to be questioning that #I’m more than good #and if you’re thinking of commenting about advice I’d kindly ask you not to #I’m just ranting and that’s it #leave me be lol #tish talks shit
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  • chaoticturtledream
    27.07.2021 - 3 hours ago

    I have Many Thoughts yet my head is somehow still Empty

    #I want to go to sleep but my minds racing #except when I try to focus on one thought or the other there's nothing there #it's a bit discombobulating and overwhelming
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  • pedropascaldice
    27.07.2021 - 3 hours ago

    every time i try to figure out what the hell dave york does, i just get more confused and i’m not sure watching the movie in full is gonna help it bc i’ve read about thirty summaries and about twenty character wikis 

    #misc. #like ??? #he used to be in the cia ? #but now he's in the dia ? #but like what does he DO there #like i read abt the dia and they seem to focus on foreign affairs #and getting information for the military for wars and all that #whereas the cia is focused mainly on getting information for politicians #like the president and all that #but like how the hell does that lead dave york to where he begins in the movie
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  • hoppinkiss
    27.07.2021 - 3 hours ago

    I dont know very much about va.rric's books yet I wanna curl up with him and follow along while he reads them to me

    it's not my fault if I fall asleep though, his voice is too relaxing

    #i cant focus if im just reading or just listening i need both to get through a story at a reasonable pace #harper has spoken #r: unwelcome tagalong
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  • tinyaibou
    27.07.2021 - 3 hours ago

    i love only having access to only my consciousness. *i* get to be the main character. *i* get to have stupid monologues in my head all the time.

    #to be fair i think if my life was a show we'd have an ensemble cast #and i think we'd get to have different episodes that focus on different people #right now tonight while reading gay comics its activating smth in my brain thats likw... yes... im the guy
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