Unfollowed you on Instagram cuz there’s no point if you haven’t even reached out to me still, now you’ll probably just follow all the stupid sluts on there. Andddd I can’t even call or text you because my phone wiped over a week ago and if you still cared and read this and wanted to contact me you would of called by now.
may those who continue
to hurt you today
find themselves in the same shoes
in which you stay
and suffer the same pain
they’re subjecting you to
in exactly the same way
they unload onto you
.
One day I will be with someone who genuinely likes me and wants me enough to reassure me and put my mind at ease as much as I would need it even if it will be every single day because of how traumatized I am because of him and his abuse and because of my horrible depression and horrible anxiety. One day I will be with someone who will genuinely like how me and my body looks, one day I’ll be with someone who actually finds me and my body attractive instead of the opposite one day I will be with someone who will put so so so so so much effort and energy into me, one day I will be with someone who will try for me without me begging or wishing or hoping that they would, one day I wouldn’t even have to try by myself, I wouldn’t have to try at all, they’ll be trying for me because they’ll genuinely love me and want me in their life. One day I will have that.
One day I’ll be with someone who loves me as much as you love them enough to give me an actual list. One day. One lifetime. I’ll have that.
you were my person. the person i missed at 3am and 3pm, the one i missed when i was with others, the one i could talk to about anything, the one i could trust.
and now you are no one.
You know he doesn’t give a shit about you and yet you still do everything in your power to satisfy him.
If you want me then want me
Stop playing with my feelings
Don’t leave me then come back
Trying to talk to me every day
As if we’re still best of friends
When my heart is still hurting
You left me when I wanted this
I can’t just step back and forget
The things I felt deep in my heart
The attraction aching at the front
Of my soul when I see you smile
I still want you so much it hurts
I don’t know what you want from me
But I’m tired of being your in-between
About just two months ago I was CLOSELY watching what I eat, not eating at all, eating crackers only when I felt like I was about to pass out because I felt like because I felt very fat and I STILL do. I feel horribly fat and I honestly just want to go back to watching my weight because I’m only eating for the baby.
text me if you think of me, i need to know that you cared, that it wasn’t just all in my head
Our state education agency has unveiled a plan for returning to school in the fall. Never mind our state is one of the ones where numbers keep hitting all time highs. I’m not going back into a classroom until numbers go way down. I’ll quit teaching if I need to. It needs to be safe for students and their families. It needs to be safe for teachers and their families.
i saw someone that looked like you today, i couldn’t help wishing it were really you
nobody can make me laugh like you did, but then also nobody can make me cry as hard as you do
I’ve been trudging through a long season of feeling apathetic in my faith and an unwillingness to develop intimacy with Jesus. But when I recently began struggling with community and friendships, I found myself seeking and longing for God again. I hate that it takes a certain aspect of my life to suffer before I realize my NEED and WANT for Jesus… but I can’t deny it. And I can only pray that my desire to return to the arms of my Father will grow stronger day by day.
I hate that I keep hurting those around me. I’m too impulsive. I’m going to ruin all of my relationships and friendships due to my mental illnesses.
