I have a weird relationship with my age.
I learned to read early, and read above my grade level for all of my childhood. Now, I can't read at all. If I do, it's much easier for me to read children's books, below my reading level.
When I was a kid, I hung out more with the adults and much older children. Many people said I was so old for my age. Now I feel like the perpetual teenager. 19 going on 30. Most of my friends are younger than me, and I feel like I relate more to the media conciousness of Gen Z even though I'm a millennial.
It doesn't help that I'm a senior in undergrad at 29, and I'm surrounded by people 7+ years younger than me in my classes. It doesn't help that I work a low-paying retail job that boomers think is for teenagers.
And it doesn't help that I came out of the closet and started to live life as a queer person at 27, causing me to have that delayed teenhood and "early" sexual experiences later than the "norm".
It also doesn't help that I didn't get diagnosed with ADHD until this year at 29 years old, and only know viewing the struggles of my childhood being the life of a nuerodivergent child without support instead of a failure full of shame.
I heard someone say on tik tok (I can't remember who, tag them if you recognize this) say that being neurodivergent for some can feel like being an adult in a child suit until you grow into a child in an adult suit... And live your adulthood feeling like you are reparenting that inner child. Sometimes it's exhausting and sometimes it feels deeply rewarding.
But yeah, I have no idea how old I feel.