Passed down like folk songs

our love lasts so long

<3

idk if it's just me or what but...

Something about Hayley Williams singing Still into You just sounds so lgbtqia+ to me ohmygod like I can only imagine her singing this to a woman literally no one else

please tell me I'm not the only one

i’m gonna get her a book i know she’ll like and write the gayest little note inside so years and years in the future when we die and this eventually ends up in a second-hand bookstore some baby gay can find it and feel okay. 

I Love You Dave Chappelle. ❤️

‪~ Baron Tremayne Caple A.K.A. Fox Man/Fox King/King Fox/Fox Foxy/Foxy Fox/Fox Kitsune/Kitsune Fox/Fox Kitsune Foxy/Baron Fox/Baron Tremayne Fox/Gemini Man/Autism Man/Asperger Man/Autism Asperger Man/Rainbow Man Is A Metrosexual/God Of Autism/King Of Autism/God Of Asperger/King Of Asperger 🦊‬

ᴛʜɪꜱ ᴅʀᴀᴡɪɴɢ ɪꜱ ᴠᴇʀʏ ʜᴏᴍᴏꜱᴇxᴜᴀʟ🏳️‍⚧️🦔✨🏳️‍🌈

Should I buy an enby flag and then just not say anything when my mom asks about it

Now that the weather has been getting a bit cooler, and now that the regional park is back open, I hope to go hiking this weekend. It's been at least a year since I've been hiking. I miss it. There's incredible peace when hiking. You know? Well, the regional park I'm going to is mostly desert but since there have been some recent rains, maybe I'll catch a bit of the waterfall along the aptly named "waterfall trail".

During this time of year, it's not at full strength but nonetheless still nice visiting it for the photo opportunities. Maybe I'll take some other pictures, too, and post them here. You'll also find them in the #Adventures section of my blog.

Do you like to go hiking? Where has been your favorite hiking spot so far?

I have 92 photos and 32 videos in my account. new content is posted every day 😉💦💕

the fact that straight girls have started wearing doc martens as a trend and I can still tell they’re straight proves it was never about the shoes

if i were a battery I’d be a…

TRIPLE AAA!!

get it???

My Experience With CompHet (Compulsory Heterosexuality)

Intro

Hello everyone! My name is Elliot, more commonly known online as Egg. I’m not exactly sure what’s prompting me to write or post this but I think it’s just something that would be really interesting to share. Especially considering this is something that took me a while to come to terms with and discover. That and I had never heard an experience like mine so I though it’d be good to share.

What is CompHet?

For clarification purposes, let’s briefly define what compulsory heterosexuality is. If you’ve never heard of the term, it can most briefly be described as thinking one is heterosexual due to the fact that its been pressured on to them since they were a child. It also plays into things like environmental factors and societal standards as well. Compulsory Heterosexuality or CompHet most commonly affects lesbians, however it can affect almost anyone. In fact, many bisexual and pansexual individuals also experience some form of CompHet. For a more thorough definition, I recommend reading Compulsory Heterosexuality and Lesbian Existence by Adrienne Rich. There are also several videos on YouTube that sum it up fairly well.

My Experience

I was not made familiar with the term CompHet until about a year ago. Prior to this I openly identified as pansexual. I was under the impression that I loved anyone as long as they had a good personality. At that point, I would have been identifying as pansexual for almost four years. I was comfortable in that label and any assumptions that came with it. I’d had my fare share of explaining that no it doesn’t mean I’m attracted to pans and explaining that no it doesn’t mean bisexual.

Similarly to how comfortable I was in being pansexual, I was comfortable with my attraction to men. Ever since I’d learned what a crush was in elementary school, I would tend to have a new crush every year. But I’d never really been in a relationship with a guy. That changed about 9 months before I discovered what CompHet was. I began to date a member of my schools marching band. He was sweet, considerate, funny, and pretty much everything a good boyfriend could be. That’s not to say he didn’t have his faults. He was forgetful and a little clumsy. We had a lot of communication issues due to our respective mental health issues but other than that we worked together harmoniously.

Until I discovered CompHet. 

When I discovered CompHet I decided to ignore it for a while. I’d seen the amount of people who had been thrown into crisis after learning about it and I didn’t want that to be me. Especially since I was supposed to be in a happy relationship. I didn’t want to ruin that. More importantly, I wasn’t exactly willing to break the heart of my boyfriend. I knew he loved me with his whole heart. What kind of person would I be to change that?

But eventually, I got around to reading about it. I read about it’s effects and signs that it could be affecting you. I burst into tears. 

Everything made sense. The way my crushes all seemed to be fleeting. The way I had practically picked someone to have a crush on all throughout elementary school and middle school. The way that most of the men I was attracted to had softer facial features and were more feminine. The way I had been so confused in first grade when someone explained to me what a crush was. 

I spent at least an hour crying that night before I decided to go to bed. When I woke up the next morning, I pretended I’d never heard of CompHet in my life. I liked men. I was supposed to like men. I had a boyfriend, so I had to like men. I’d kissed him and I liked it so I had to like men. I’d identified as pansexual for so long, who was I to change that label? Why would I try to change that label? But most importantly, I couldn’t not like men because that would ruin my chances of the wedding I’d envisioned since I was a child. A wedding where my parents would be there and my grandparents with them. A wedding my entire family would congratulate me on. A wedding right out of a Disney movie. I wasn’t ready to give that fantasy up. 

So I spent the next month of my relationship being the significant other I was supposed to be. But it was hard to do that when all I wanted was out. I wanted some excuse to get out. To be able to figure this whole CompHet situation out. But I couldn’t tell my boyfriend. I didn’t want to hurt him like that. To tell him that I may have never loved him. What would that do to him?

So instead I hurt him by not talking to him. I only talked when he started conversations. Put in minimal effort hoping he’d fall out of love with me. And he did. He broke up with me and we stopped talking for months. 

But without a boyfriend to give me an excuse for why I couldn’t be a lesbian, my mental health just got worse. I had to analyze everything I did. Every attraction I’d ever had to any man. But I never questioned my attraction to women. I never questioned it because it just felt natural. My first real crush had been on a girl in my first grade class. I hadn’t realized it was a crush until years later but now I understood the way I had felt then fully. I never questioned the girl in my eighth grade English class who I’d written poetry about because of how pretty I thought she was. I knew I was attracted to them. I just wasn’t sure if I was attracted to men. 

So I kept questioning, but I put it on the back burner. I needed to focus on school. I needed to focus on my friends and my after school activities. And by doing so I felt happier. I felt happier not thinking about CompHet. I felt happier knowing that it existed but not thinking about it. Not questioning myself, just existing. I began identifying as queer instead of pansexual. I became friends with my now ex-boyfriend and remembered how amazing of a person he was and is outside of a relationship. 

And over about a month or two I finally came to terms with it. I was a lesbian. I am a lesbian. 

It hurt. Accepting that I wasn’t attracted to men sometimes felt like ripping a part of myself out because of how ingrained it had been in me for so long. But I began to meet other people who’d experienced CompHet and their experiences helped. Seeing that I wasn’t the only person experiencing this made me feel better about who I was. And meeting other people in my school who were lesbian. Remembering people I’d met in previous years of school who’d identified as lesbian and remembering how confident they’d been. That’s how it stopped hurting. 

I still love men. I think I’ve accepted that part of me will always love them. Just not in the way I love women. I love them as friends, as brothers, as fathers, as cousins; I love them the way I love a good painting or my favorite teddy bear. It’s a wholesome sort of love. An innocent sort of love. An admiring sort of love. A sibling sort of love. That is the way I love men. 

And the way I love women is the way I love sunsets in autumn. The way I loved my first crush in first grade. The way I love the poetry I wrote about the girl with long dark hair in my eighth grade English class. A full sort of love. A complete and utter consuming type of love. A romantic type of love. That is the way I love women.

My Advice

To those struggling with CompHet, know that you are not alone. There are dozens of other people who have been where you are and have felt what you felt. Who have felt confused, sad, upset, frustrated, you name it someone has felt it before. 

Take your time. Don’t stress yourself out too much. Eventually you will come to a conclusion about who you are and who you love. And whether it takes you a week or three years, you are valid. No matter the conclusion you come to, you are valid. Remember that.

Genderfluid people really just look at a gender and be like:

Making a photo wall with your boyfriend...Sticking all the photos that you have taken with your boyfriend while talking about the story behind those beautiful moments. Having fun with them and enjoying quality time together while creating a wall filled the memories made by the both of you❤❤❤

Feel like turning this place into a gender identity/pronoun/sexuality/romantic orientation update blog since Tumblr won't let me delete this blog for some reason-

:']

Idk just a random idea, might post pride flags too idk-

Don't you have that one classmate that you know they will misgender you if they are angry at u

Me: Mom, dad I'm a Welsh meatball.

My parents: *gasp*

(Welsh meatballs are called faggots)

i genuinely don’t think I’ll ever be able to take myself serious with my hair down 😅

just loved to take a portrait of Chris before he left Berlin

Una pequeña guía para principiantes.