Just remembered this black ndn woman from my tribe/town who like idk her at all but she was a regular at my ex job and everyone hated her and pegged her as a difficult customer but she loved me immediately as soon as we met, before we knew each other’s backgrounds, and it’s really solidifying my struggle with integrating into other communities after leaving tribal grounds for a while as a kid like idek how to explain it to you but the cultural divide is so real. Ppl just don’t understand us and we don’t understand them either but like. The difference is they don’t try tho they just decide we’re strange or unreasonable or smthn and stick with it
#thinking abt how deep this probably goes and the effect this still has on my interpersonal relationships today #i feel like there’s a lot of things certain partners or even friends I’ve had have perceived as roughness or difficult to manage #and I put a lot into acknowledging that things are diff where I’m from & trying to assimilate basically but ykw? so often it feels unfair #not just the fact that it more often than not is totally 1 sided but also it feels like a lot of things I’m looked down on for don’t even #affect anybody else ?? like it’s just me existing…anyway I wonder if this plays a role in how ppl in my tribe tend to only have #relationships within our tribe. along w the whole segregation & antiblackness thing ofc lol
love being shadowed by my friends because they're all so pretty so no boy ever takes an interest in me 🙃
#personal #sorry for the cringe #but it's been like this my whole life and I'm very tired #boys don't add me on instagram or talk to me #they always go after my friends #and then they tell me I'm not ugly but lol I can't believe them like this #it's been a bad day #mental illness#body image#ugly
the fact i need to wait until nov 1 for my first invisalign setting and tray 🙏 i just wanna starttt HELLO dentist man shave my teeth give me some toothy lumps and lets get these bad girls into some plastic xoxo
#i need SO MANY attachments #and SO MUCH shaving on my lower teeth #i just wanna start so i know what its all gonna be like like idec if i have a lisp a few days like i need to know how much #uglier im gonna get before i get incrementally hotter (mainly through confidence #they ARE only teeth) #im also like... i get anxious ab girls i meet on tinder if they notice my crooked teeth so im like extra anxious #ab the girl ive been talking to for like 5 months if we eventually meet and like i have a feeling my invisalign eill be more obvious #than my wonky teeth i just ... ugh #why i always think a snaggletooth will be a dealbreaker is beyond me its dumb #most people say they dont notice my teeth including my bff of like 8 years lol so idk dudes i see them every day and the 3d scan #really fucking exposed me #long ol tags bye #invisalign
ruh roh just realized that actually my dream my whole life has been to be alex gaskarth in the late 2000s experiencing fame and glamour kills fashion in real-time but that's never going to happen :/
#sorry im a weirdo i wish i were joking 😭😭😭😭 #no possible explanation here yall this is just who i am. literally would love to have lived that reality. #it's very sad that i never will on account of how i am me and awg is a separate person. just very unfortunate. for me #lol agajsgkagamsgsmsgkahsmsbsms ok sorry yall im gonna go back to my hw lmao #p#atl
i have a thing where if someone says something is funny i will always laugh even if the thing they’re saying is funny happened a while ago. like i always do and worse i’m AWARE i’m doing it and unable to stop it anyway 😭😭 honestly i’m terrified i’m gonna get called out on it one day lmaooo
#i don’t even know why i do it!!!!!! i just do!!!!!!!! #don’t mind me i’m just regretting every embarrassing/awkward thing i’ve ever done ever at 1am lol
Hey uh…. Father Paul could 100% get it, respectfully.
#go ahead and send me to hell for saying it #when I tell you this man is so fine #I’m only on episode 2 so I’ll update if I regret this lol #midnight mass #midnight mass netflix #Netflix #this has been a post #textpost
Catch me really out here in our year 2021 watching clips of Shugo Chara
#shugo chara #I remembered tadase and that was my first mistake LOL #my second anime crush… love that boy… he deserved better… #at least they got together in the anime #that’s all that really matters to me 😂 #also??? Amu is such a fashion legend??? #can’t believe I have to draw Amu in cute outfits
#It does cross my mind #Whenever things become too much I have a habit of trying to erase myself from the face of the Earth #like I'm some skittish animal #and I am lol #Things would probably make more sense if I could explain everything #but I really don't want to put my whole life on the internet #Just believe me when I say I'm just hurting and trying to be better
This is the response to me saying you need to be authoritative with and respectful of animals. To direct their energy and establish boundaries to avoid anxiety, and to establish trust so you can push their boundaries enough to handle them for their health when needed.
Like. I'm not gonna apologize for holding my dog down gently but firmly when she needs to be checked for ticks, or scratches, or what have you, even though she's clearly uncomfortable.
And I'm not gonna be told by some petulant brat that I'm abusive for taking responsibility for my animal's health. Sorry you're clearly unsuited to actually caring for animals instead of just playing with them, but that's your problem, not mine. I've made sure that my dog trusts me enough that she can remain fairly calm and answer to me when I'm occasionally making her uncomfortable, because that's needed.
And I've done it without conditioning an automatic fear response into her out of some twisted need for dominance, which was the shitty behavior your post was actually about.
I'm responsible for her health and wellbeing, and that takes precedence over occasional, momentary discomfort. Grow up.
#cyan speaks #my parent used to have to pin me to pick ticks off me when I didnt answer to *be still* #should I have been left with ticks on me??? no lol thats retarded #same for animals. they dont know me as someone who routinely disrespects and scolds them. #so they can handle the stress of being told hush and be still bc mamas pulling a tick or cutting a dewclaw thats poking your foot #just like a child can
Thought I’d make one of these so people can get to know me lol
-I reblog whatever! if it makes me smile I'll reblog it!! you have been warned >:)
-I support all artists!! New, Older, Cringe, NSFW, ect it takes hard work to create, the least we can do is support each other, i might not like certain ones myself but as long as no one is getting hurt, it shouldnt matter.
-If there is something on my blog you dont like, im sorry! There is a cool Unfollow button and a Block button! they're easily accessible please use them!
#lmaoo this was kinda fun #im a trash man i live in the garbage #i love everyone as cringe as that is and i cant express how happy seeing people create things makes me #you're all so cool and i love yall #ill make sonic stuff sometime i'm just lazy lol #louis doodles#louis talks #who gets the hoodie >:) if u do we are besties hands down
✫-Normally this planet was not one to disappoint; one could find what they were looking for and move on with their day. For others, however, it takes more effort to find what you need even if it means flying around the entire planet just to find a special artifact, and one that had a habit of teleporting to different parts of the globe.
A certain Cybertronian artifact, to be precise, and something the young Archaeologist had been tracking for months now. Each time she attempts to dig it out of the ground or scope out a deep cave just to find it, the item will teleport and end up somewhere way too far. She's attempted to wait until it's teleported close, only to for it to suddenly blip away. It's become such an annoyance that Fast Track was beginning to think the artifact was sentient and could be carrying something important.
This time however, her droid made a suggestion. When going out to look for the artifact, try sneaking up on it and catch it with a force field that could prevent it from teleporting away. It seemed almost too good of a plan to work, but it wasn't like she had other ideas, so when she tracked the artifact a reasonable distance away, she packed her weapon of choice and transformed once out of her ship to fly towards the waypoint.
Of course, she continued to have her doubts, which would ensue her and the droid to have a small argument on the way.
"Whoever made this thing, clearly had something to hide, and it's not helping that other Cybertronians are here too." She huffs with the droid in her alt mode keeping track of where she was headed.
"Well then you better hope we can catch it before anyone else does, that is, if they can grab it. Which I doubt."
They would fly through the state of the country they were currently in for about an hour until Wonders would alert her that they are about a mile from the relic. Fasty stops as soon as she could and descends close to the ground to let Wonders out and transform. The feline takes out her weapon and the two begin their walk, closing in on the skittish artifact.
"What'cha think could be inside this relic, assuming there's more to it than the fragging thing just teleporting everywhere?"
Her droid seemed a little too focused on the datapad he held but would answer her eventually, "Who knows, could range from a virus, to a highly toxic substance, or something of great value to anything completely worthless."
"Nah, it's gotta be of importance if it teleports that much. I bet there's a super rare Cybertronian relic that some Ancient Prime made eons ago."
Wonders would stare at her for a moment and go back to his data pad. "Talk like that can make you disappointed real fast."
"Hey, it's only speculation."
After about thirty minutes of walking, the droid stops her as his datapad starts beeping. "We're close. Until it's found, we need to make as less noise as possible to avoid startling it." Fasty nods, pointing her weapon out and glancing around. The area around them was grassy yet rocky. Mountains surrounded the two as well as boulders down to pebbles littered the Earth floor. It would be hard to walk around with this many rocks, so the feline transforms into her Cyberfeline form with the gun mounted on her back for ease of movement. Step by step she treks through, looking for any light anomaly that could indicate the relic's presence.
#♫ ι ƒєєℓ ℓιкє ι'∂ вє вєттєя σƒƒ αℓℓ αℓσηє || яρ ♫ #;theslagmaker #☆ ;נσιи мє ιи му α∂νєитυяєѕ || qυєυє ☆ #//sorry it's so long #//if you want me to shorten or change it let me know #also I'm kinda rusty with the coding it's been a while lol
also, y'all better remember to spam my inbox after you read it too 🔪🔪🔪
if you see any typos, no you didn't. it's frakin 3:30 am😅
#you've been warned lol #in all seriousness though i am ending it *there* on purpose #not just to get chapter posted tonight (morning for me) #and 5k is not short don't even start with me💀 #appreciate you all❤️
while i was living in a motel for 3 weeks i simply was not going to use the skeevy laundry so i took to washing my clothes nightly in the shower, wringing them out, and hanging them up to dry. while i did my best to keep everything ventilated and spaced out ultimately this was not the best approach. so now my masks all have a faint smell of mildew and immediately get me sniffling and crying as soon as i put them on
#i have to get more lol #(YOU CAN LAUGH AT THIS) #this is such a peak me fuck up #needlessly complicated solution to a simple problem leads to daily issues
hey uh, this is gonna sound strange and please dont feel like you have to start liking my stuff but like?? do any of yall actually see my posts anymore?
like i know my concepts for my art have gone down hill as ive ran out of things to say & maybe my art all looks the same now days but i personally feel like my art has overall gotten better?
idk i used to average about 100 likes on my art per month and this month im on track to hit like? 28 lmao, and a lot of my art pieces have gotten zero likes at all?
like i have nearly 50 followers and most of my likes always came from my tags & it's not like my follower count is going down or i stopped using those tags?,, idk its like wow that many people looked at my piece and not a *single* person likes my art anymore lol,,
and i really don't want that to come off as please pity me i just, want to know if thats actually true or if people simply just don't see my art anymore lol
#also like? when shitty doodles i made when i was first starting out #and had no followers or anything do better than my current art #idk it kinda hurts lol #like don't get me wrong i love tumblr and I'm personally far more active on it #compared to other social media #but like is it really worth it for me to be active on here when literally no one sees my work yknow? #like even my artfol does better than my tumblr and i literally never use artfol other than posting #idk just a little vent ig #froggy rambles
i know first impressions aren’t everything, but when it comes to books/shows/mangas/animes/etc., i feel that i can tell based on the beginning rather or not it’s going to be something that i’ll like.
#most of the time i'm right #i've been thinking this for a while but it's taken me until now to make a post about it #and it feels especially relevant because recently i was reading a fic #and i skimmed very sparsely through the first paragraph and was already getting excited because i could tell it was going to be good lol #i don't know how to articulate it #of course it's got to do with the writing #but i don't think it's necessarily even the story like it doesn't need to have an interesting beginning that immediately hooks me into thing #*things #as long as whatever's going on is handled well i know it's likely to carry on through the rest of the story so i'm willing to trust it more #and it makes me think of back in college when i used to go through submissions for my university's literary magazine #at the beginning i thought it was unfair to judge things so quickly based on its beginning alone #because the middle and ending could make up for it #but clearly doing that influenced my thinking although i don't think it's singlehandledly what changed my mind #it's just an area that i can mark as a before and after #like it's a lot to go through and you don't have all the time in the world so you gotta be able to pick up things quickly #and it helps to know what you want so that you can look for it #and immediately recognize it when you see it #text