I've written, like, 50 words the past 1 and a half hour
Also, I have left my Hollow Knight fics aside as well. Man I forgot those existed.
#shuake#akeshu #idek if i actually wanna tag this #oh well i technically did it already #hello if u dont know me and ur seeing this dont follow me expecting to find any ao3 links on my acc #i dont post the stuff i write #cuz it exists only for me #also im lazy with them so
Working retail on a Saturday in December really makes you think that maybe the extinction of the human race wouldn't be so bad after all because people are stupid assholes.
#retail hell#my post #my boss also always picks me to ask to do things even though i was the busiest today #like hi i'm working on the table that most needs doing maybe i'm not the ideal choice for a long task #oh well guess i'll finish my table after my break and it'll be done in time for closing #people are rude anyway they don't deserve it #and men are so useless #how are you a grown ass man and need me to explain to you what size 36x30 means on men pants
#Reala#Prism#fantopian#NiD#JoD #NiGHTS into Dreams #NiGHTS Journey of Dreams #my own OC's #my own characters #my own headcannons #ships #OC x Canon #Reala x Prism #Realism #i apologize for yhe long post i have no idea how to do that 'read more' thing that long posts do #if anyone can tell me id be forever grateful #and to anyone who read the entire post thank you for sticking with me through my rambles #my own post
She laughs, and follows his gaze. The water is calm in early leaf-fall, gentle waves lapping against the shore and reflecting the pale yellow light of the sun as it dips toward the horizon. As much as she hates the lake, hates looking into the water and seeing the reflection that shines back… she’s not sure she could ever feel at home anywhere without it. And even if she could, he won’t leave. And she’s not sure if she can feel at home anywhere without him, either.
like father, like daughter by @space-pilot-3000
HIII here is your early merry crimmas gift . originally i drew somthing stupid and then i redrew it and then i was like . actually scout deserves better SO. here it is. i will post the stupid stuff later . maybe on actual christmas. anyways HERE i hope you like it
#reread like father like daughter and . like i dont actually have words to put into how i feel #so im just going to flail my arms around in some incomprehensible gesture and hope it gets the message across #wc#warrior cats#warriors#heathertail#breezepelt#xbwx art #regardless. ilysm scout <3 merry crimmas #you are very cool and have Such Good Takes constantly #(even if you will never truly appreciate how thornclaw is literally the best & most consistently written character in warriors :/ #but you win some you lose some i suppose) #and your writing is just . *chef's kiss* it is SO good #also the nice tags u leave on my art always makes me go 😭 #and your ideas and aus are just So Cool. 11/10 #you are very cool and are one of the few ppl on this site i respect 💕 #also i wanted u thank u 1) for engaging with the wildly stupid team war criminals stuff i was posting a few months ago #beacuse. that made me so happy i cannot begin to describe honestly #and 2) for always leaving such nice tags on my art. Thank You you & cotton are honestly like the only reason i made wc content anymore #ilysm scout <3 #also when u rbed the wip for this and was like ''oh this is epic'' or whatever i was like ''HAHA i should hope so cuz its for u'' #also ngl you are definitely one of the #''this person is so insanely good at what they do how do they even consider me qualified to talk to them'' #people LOL
I see Tommy is doing an angsty lore stream and I feel nothing
#text posts#/lh #I hope everybody who gives a lick about tommy angst is having a good one #always good to be fed by canon #but for me it's just... 'oh tommy is doing angst... okay' #'won't be looking forward to my dash for the past ten days lmao'
smth smth, there are two wolves!!! inside of me!!! one of them low-key wants to do more avpd postin for the shits and giggles, and also to just generally record my Brain Vomit for personal reasons. the other one fears that i will be annoying and ""bring down the mood"" or whatever because i feel like most people i Know perceive me as this tiny lil cheery being, and going Off Script would be Bad, Actually. I'll probably ultimately end up deleting most, if not all of my drafts re:avpd bullshit.
in short: fellas i am once again Experiencing Symptoms :D ! /lh
#in case i never post this‚ just for my own records or whatever: 12/03/2021 #//txt#//personal #fuck it im posting it but also #//avpd #me: i wanna do avpd posts!!! #my avpd: wow bro thats such a funny joke. would you like to agonize about this for an hour #me: what#//delete later #smth smth limited edition bell post! will probably yoink this in a few hours lmfao
#yknow what I think i'm going to post this as is. #i keep rereading it and going grrrrrr but I dunno what to add. #so. perish #ask#ahit #a hat in time #snatcher#mustache girl#dj grooves#the conductor#long post #VERY long ramble #Honestly this is just what I came up with in a day. If I were to actually plan this out with a lot of thought #it'd be a lot more. a lot longer #if ahit wanted the proposed found family to work it would either have to be so much longer #or. a lot that happened. would have had to NOT happen #that or like just give me some dialogue closure that feels genuine at least got damn #even following battle of the birds. imagine after the last act you just get a call from whichever director you fought profusely apologizing #man. ALSO MAKE TIMEPIECE CORRUPTION CLEAR!!! MAKE PLOT WORK!! #that's all. goodby
Kamen Rider Revice & Intentional Writing (Part 3.2)
Warnings: Obv gonna go into spoilers. So read at your own risk <33. Also mentions of suicidal ideation. So trigger warning. (Spoilers up to episode 12)
part 1. part 2. part 3.1 ; Igarashi ways to affection post
Alright, y’all. What is WITH Vice and his weird obsession with eating…..👀👀👀👀. Lol find out below the cut.
So, now that there are 12 episodes out (13 by tomorrow <33), I had time to compare Vice to the other inner-demons….and one thing that really stood out to me was Vice’s obsession with food. Originally I thought this was something *all* demons did or whatever —eat, or try to eat, humans—but none of the deadmans 3 have shown a need or desire for such things. Kagerou didn’t either (he was solely obsessed with killing Ikki rip), and even the random-stampee-monsters just…..fought humans….not try to eat them. And so then I thought: “What the f*ck, Ikki? What does this even MEAN? Why is Vice so obsessed with eating? More specifically, eating humans?”
“I think I need more evidence before I have a working hypothesis. It could be Ikki’s need or childish desire to possess and control as a way to secure love and comfort?” (I send videos) “Okay after watching these few vids, actually seems like my spitball hypothesis is right LOL. Because Vice is only going after the family members and trying to eat them. I am also thinking that in addition to Ikki’s desire to claim and possess the family and secure their love, there is also some repressed aggression as well, hence the action of eating.”
(Sidenote here, but Vice’s introducing himself as someone that love’s ‘tasty looking humans’ after Hiromi’s introduction is…..lol Vice did you say that because Hiromi is a tasty looking human? 👀💀. Ikki’s gay ass rlly put this here right in front of my salad 💀💀.)
Ikki is (lmao) “affection starved” of which Vice is taking quite literally. What makes this theory more credible is Vice’s weird fixation on “love.” (Which isn’t only Vice—but also subtly shown in Ikki as well.) Vice doesn’t know what “love” is, even going so far as to ask if it’s something you eat. (👀. #Interesting….) The “Is there no love for me” kills me, because child!Ikki is asking that. Ikki, with a kid’s voice, asking: “Is there no love for me?” Just….process that for a second. Every single one of Ikki’s self-sacrificial deeds are something he does to gain affection, yet this line tells us that deep down, some part of Ikki still feels unloved and desperate for affection.
“Intellectually he knows they love him. But throughout his childhood, subconsciously it feels like they just, care about him less, or at the very least, his right for signs of comfort and affection has to be earned.”
Vice not knowing what the word means, then wanting Ikki to praise or compliment him and ‘show him a little love’ — to the point of being happy and pacified with the lame shoulder-slap Ikki does eventually give him, is essentially the show literally directly telling the audience that Vice (again) doesn’t *know* what love is. He craves it. He wants to be complimented. He wants praise. He wants support.
“Yep yep yep. Basically looking for validation in any and all forms without having the vocabulary—verbal or otherwise—to ask for it.”
This is especially obvious at the end of episode 2—when Vice asks if Ikki wants to share a friendship hug, and in episode 10 with Vice’s reaction to Hiromi touching him. Vice….(in the Hiromi example), like he freezes at first. (Notice, Ikki also freezes at first when Vice asks if he wants a hug.) And then you can see Vice just….processing Hiromi’s gesture of friendship/physical affection. This is shock. Vice is *shocked* at receiving positive physical contact/affection.
(Sidenote: But Ikki rejecting Vice’s hug is also quite telling. Because, although Ikki freezes at the offer, he *is* quick to reject it. Showing he doesn’t quite want to receive comfort from himself. It also shows that Ikki is embarrassed at the idea of someone giving him physical affection, perhaps because he craves it, but doesn’t know how to ask for it.)
“Hiromi obviously needs help. (Ref: we were talking about Hiromi + Ikki’s psychology, and why Hiromi and Ikki have a *very* different relationship than Hiromi and Daiji do.) Not mental help (well that too), but just help y’know? And Ikki is hardwired to be “helpful” so that’s the catalyst. But Hiromi says the magic words of ‘we’re in this together’ or something to that effect, so Ikki’s instinct now sees Hiromi as a friend, instead of a responsibility alone. Which is why Vice is so amicable to Hiromi, he satiates the need Vice and Ikki can’t voice.”
Vice and Ikki’s shock about receiving positive physical affection is so telling, and so sad, because it really shows how little Ikki views himself, that not even his inner-demon can conceive the idea of receiving such contact. Which is why Vice wanting to be seen as ‘cool’ is also like being shot in the face….because Vice doesn’t want to be “cool” for the sake of being cool….he wants to be seen as cool because then that would mean others see him as someone capable that they can trust and rely on. Ikki *wants* others to rely on him — then he can fulfill his ‘role’ and gain the affection and comfort he so desperately craves.
Vice fighting the monster to get Ikki’s ‘love’ is also another literal way of showing how Ikki believes he can get love….only by doing things and sacrificing himself for others 💀💀💀💀💀💀💀💀.
This is another side note because we don’t know enough about Hiromi to really be throwing out an analysis about him, but I literally would not be surprised if both Ikki and Vice wanted to kiss him on the mouth.
(1) Hiromi is the *ONLY* person Vice interacts positively with. Vice literally insulted George’s work during their first ‘real’ conversation. And he squabbles with Daiji, and has also tried to *eat* Daiji and Ikki’s mother. So the fact that Vice has always interacted positively with Hiromi, even giving him an immediate nickname is just….really fking funny, and really fking telling.
(2) Hiromi has been the *only* one to offer legitimate help to Ikki, especially when Ikki needed it most —during Daiji’s fratricidal rampage.
(3) I haven’t forgotten about Vice’s ‘introduction’ to Hiromi’s introduction, as ‘someone who loves tasty-looking humans.’ Lmao to Ikki’s repressed gay homosexual ass.
As I said, I don’t know enough about Hiromi to be making any claims, but I *do* think it's interesting that the only person to have complimented Hiromi on both performance and looks, is Ikki. (Technically the looks of his suit, but still.) 👀 👀. (And Hiromi telling Daiji that he used to be bullied real badly, and that during that time he always waited for a hero to come save him…..and y’know as said above. Ikki’s hardwired to be helpful. Lmao.)
My conclusion? Is that Ikki is in need for some major therapy 💀💀. Part 3.3 will analyze Ikki’s special kind of repression, and why it has firmly set Ikki on the path to tragedy.
I almost told her today how I feel, how I feel we are growing distant and I almost had an anxiety attack just thinking about it.
Something was really feeling off when we where together.
I feel bad saying I'm dealing well with it.
#depressing shit #my own mess #but anyway i feel something is off most of the time so maybe is just me #also i almost post this on Twitter where she follows me xd #not that she knows about this blog at all #not that no one knows #fuck it venting on tags
my favorite thing that hateful anons send has to be. omg you clearly sent that [previous] anon to yourself like ??? do you. realize that we can simply post whatever we want to post at any point in time. i do not require an anon to share something that i want to share on my blog that i run
#or the one who accused me of sending myself compliments like. #why would i send myself compliments like what is the point #i don't even post most of the kind and complimentary messages i receive bc i know i'll be bombarded w anons trying to humble me #sdklfjsjks this is not even about anything recent it's just something i think about from to time #but please know if you've ever sent me a kind anon. i've stared at it beaming and bursting w love for you