Just think in a few months, Winter will turn to Spring.
In 62 days it’ll be the first day of Spring.
The first thought that comes to mind when I think about March is how, it’s been 4 years since Mas left to the Navy. My best friend says Mas wants to come back home but hasn’t decided if she will leave the Navy or try to continue her contract with them but in her home state.
It’s sad how this news excites me… Truth is I randomly have dreams about her, my horoscope warns me of an ex showing up at my doorstep. The only person in my life who I had a profound amount love for is Mas. There was so much passion and despite her always choosing someone else. I was the sucker who let her grab on to me. Though I’ll always care for her, it’ll be from a far. My mind constantly thinks about the games she’s played…the fool I became. Every person who came after me and every person I came after. I became her revolving door of second best, option B, the backup plan that never fails, and the path most visited but never truly cared for.
LESSON I LEARNED:
I will never treat someone like this!
I tried to tell her I couldn’t be friends with her because it hurt me too much. So she invited my best friend out everywhere. I started to feel not only left out but upset. My best friend told me to try and be friends with her…I tried, in the experience I saw different people she dated. Jealousy filled me, everytime her relationship went sour, I was there. I picked her spirits up, made her feel good and then to her, my work was done. Every moment I tried to be a good friend I was slowly losing myself. There is no nice way of saying this but her kisses fucked with me so many times and it became harder to say “we are only friends”.