Antonio Giovinazzi greeting a fan, Feb 2020
Antonio Giovinazzi greeting a fan, Feb 2020
Series Warnings: violence / talking about abuse / toxic relationships / talking about nudes sex and sex tapes / drugs / underage drinking
Pt. Warnings: abuse / being a fugitive???
Series Summary: A new girl, a shoebox of old memories, a past she’s trying to forget coincide with a hotheaded, but selfless, boy. teenagers getting in way over their heads
Pt. Summary: In a desperate attempt to sort everything out, Y/N finds herself in the ones place she least expected to be
A/N: ok ok ok i promise im writing my requests oops anyway love yall send more requests cuz im always bored. Also, yall dont understand how sad i am that this is ending :( BUT started writing another series so lemme know if u wanna get tagged in that <3
Chapters linked in my masterlist.
“John B, what are we doing at the police station?” JJ asked, breaking the stuffy silence that was consuming the vehicle.
“Somebody’s gotta tell them what happened.” He justified.
“Need me to come in, like, as a witness?” you asked. He shook his head.
forever - jj maybank
req. - Hi love!!! There is a song lyric that I love that says “I could hold you in my arms forever” and I just imagine fluffy jj after a tiring day out on the beach with his girlfriend and being fluffy and cuddly. After a nice shower jj x reader are closing their eyes cuddling and he says this to her. I would cry omg😭 any chance you’d write this concept??
synopsis - fluffy jj love after a long beach day
a/n - i love this thank you!!
t/w - none
w/c - 0.633
taglist - to be added go here - @harrysbbby @
bbymaybank01@silversunsandstars @stilinskiandsuch @poguecollins @thelostgenerationatlast @rewindlr @lilpeekabooze @teenwaywardasgardian @write-from-the-heart @hopelesswritingxd @kennedywxlsh
the air was cold as both jj and y/n stepped out of the shower—bodies wrapped in two fluffy orange towels. quiet giggles filled the bathroom, which was filled with steam from the shower. sand was coating what seemed like every corner of the room, some still remaining on their scalps from the day they spend surfing and hanging around the beach. the couple stood in front of the mirror, y/n humming a tune to whatever song was currently playing in the other room. jj watched her open the drawers, grabbing her skin care items then sitting on the counter.
y/n pulled jj between her legs, unscrewing the cap to the face mask. jj’s face twisted in disgust at the sight of the green substance, pulling away as y/n dipped her fingers into it. “there’s no way that’s going on my face,” he gagged dramatically, making y/n tsk and roll her eyes. she didn’t say anything, just pulled jj closer and started to put the mask on his face.
minutes later, the two both had matching masks on. y/n led jj out of the bathroom, the music playing louder. she searched through her drawers, hips swaying underneath the towel. “do you want shorts or sweatpants?” she questioned, back still facing her boyfriend.
jj thought for a moment, leaning against light grey walls. “sweatpants. no shirt, obviously.” he joked, and y/n swore she could hear the smile in his voice.
tossing the clothes behind her, y/n pulled out her own pair of sweatpants (jj’s but rolled) and sports bra. sliding the clothes on carefully, she searched more to find a scrunchie to tie her hair up. as she pulled the hair through the final loop, jj stood behind y/n and wrapped his arms around her waist. jumping from the touch, y/n slowly sank into his warmth.
“you look so good,” jj hummed, leaning his head on her shoulder.
y/n rolled her eyes, “jus in pajamas, my love.”
jj shrugged, choosing to not respond as he continued to hold her. a chill ran through the room, running goosebumps up both of their spines. “let’s go take off the masks,”
leading them back into the bathroom, y/n wet a face towel and turned to jj, sitting on the counter to reach his face. he leaned into her touch as she wiped the clay mask off his face, her feet swinging in the comfortable silence. her heels hit the wooden drawers, flinching from the impact. jj took notice, pressing a quick kiss to the tip of her nose. he took the towel from her, wiping off her face mask for her.
“i’ll go get the towels,” jj said softly, helping y/n hop down. she started doing her skincare as jj went into her room, grabbing the towels off the floor and bringing them downstairs to the washroom. he waved at her parents, making his way back upstairs to watch y/n finish her skin care with a mario badescu spray.
y/n turned to him, “come here. let me spray you,” jj rose and eye brow, making y/n roll her eyes. he stepped closer and shut his eyes, flinching at the cold water on his skin. putting the cap on, y/n slid the final item into her drawer before following jj to her bed.
the bedsheets were moved out of the way quickly as the two laid down, y/n on jj’s stomach. her eyes were shut, a sudden wave of soreness from swimming and surfing washing over her. jj traced circles onto her back, eyes shutting as he also suddenly got sore and tired.
though half asleep, jj managed to mutter out “i could hold you in my arms forever.”. y/n smiled, eyes opening to look up at him.
“yeah?” y/n asked, getting a short nod ‘yes’ from jj. smiling, she closed her eyes again to let sleep takeover her.
Theses on Theses: Introduction
Martin Luther is considered one of the greatest biblical figures in Christian history. I am sure that many people link his name to the African American preacher by the same name. However, these two men are quite different. I was reading through the history of the original Martin Luther and it’s riddled with change, danger, and enlightenment. The reason he is famous is because of his ideas. Yet, one or 95 of those ideas were the most famous of all. He was never quite settled in his spiritual faith. To Martin, something felt off within the church. What nagged him deep inside was the relationship between the church and God. He just did not buy (the church) the way it was. Something was not right. So, he created 95 (theses) thoughts on church conduct in his time.
Martin was a man of the church. A man after God’s own heart. Yet, clearly, he despised the human leaders of God. In that day, the church came up with a hair brained idea to make money. It was called indulgences. This idea was geared towards asking people to pay a sin tax of repentance. They were promoting the purchase of grace (indulgences) from God, and in return, you receive a ticket into heaven. For Martin Luther that was blasphemy. To the church, Luther was blasphemy for questioning them. Hence, much of Luther’s life was spent on the run.
What are the famous 95 Theses? In 1517, Martin Luther had constructed 95 thoughts or Theses on the plight of the church. He nailed it to the door of the Wittenberg church. Yes, that act got him in hot water. Another problem was that these thoughts were also very popular among the faithful. It spread like wild fire. I suspect the Pope and the church were not impressed at all. Some of these “Theses” are time sensitive to the day they were written. They are very Pope centric in regards to the indulgences scheme. Martin Luther’s Theses are honest and to the point. In essence they threw the current Pope under the bus. Yet, most of these thoughts are bang on describing the current modern church too.
With that said, I have broken these 95 Theses into 9 parts. I hope to put a current spin on the 95 thoughts (theses) in order to make them more adaptable for us today. What do they represent? What was Luther thinking? As if I know. Yet, we can get a small picture of his point. How? It’s because I noticed that (clumped together) they make common statements. Hopefully, that will produce 9 themes. Themes like money, sin, the pope and more. This could look boring and outdated on the surface. What does indulgences have to do with people of the 21st century? Let me tell you, they do fit today. Not everything done in the Christian world is godly. Church and Christianity has painted God on everything they do. Yet, is everything the church embarks on God approved? Martin Luther was asking the same questions.
These thoughts of Martin Luther are dandy. No wonder it almost got him killed. Yet, they are so thoughtful and deep. He wants authentic Christianity. The focus of a Christian should never be on being forgiven or entering heaven. Sure, we need that, but is that the aim of a Christian? Martin felt that focusing on the here and now with Jesus was a better option. It’s like John the Baptist saying he must decrease while Jesus increases. In our lives we must decrease. What I mean is that God should be glorified more than us. We do work for the glory of the kingdom. The spotlight should never be on us more than God. It’s the same for the church. They are not the straw that stirs the drink: Jesus is. Martin Luther was questioning the practices of the church. Why? Those practices made the church look bigger than God.
Starting next week, we will take an in-depth (and interesting) look at my first thought on Martin Luther’s 95 Theses. Let’s see what he thought about the issues in his day and how they relate to our modern times. Sit back and enjoy this summer with a great outlook on the Wittenberg 95 Theses of Martin Luther.
Alright, my lovelies. I really hope you enjoy this part, i’m slightly nervous about it but fingers crossed.
Warnings: Cursing, angst(?)
Taglist: @thebendslikebendover @awkwardnesshabitat @dpaccione @danicarosaline @infinityspacesuniverse @pogues-never-say-die @collectiveuniverses @jjmaybankx @1d5sosddl @k-k0129 @popcrone818 @starlightstories @jeyramarie @obxlife @angvelic @sovuckie @abigailpankow @rudypankow-whore @y0ungandfuckingdumb @her-silent-gaze @sunwardsss
You wanted to bang your head against the table, mentally yelling at yourself for the events that unfolded two days ago. For the past forty-some hours you’ve been constantly talking down to yourself, trying not to relive the moment you let your emotions take over your head.
You had a lot of How could you’s and an immense amount of you’re so stupid. Why did you let it happen? Was it being tucked away in his room, thinking about the last summer you spent together? Hearing that he hadn’t gotten rid of any pictures to do with you? The feel of his broad chest warming your back? The whisper of his breath across your shoulder and cheek?
Whatever it was, you ended up shirtless with your nails racking down his chest and his tongue doing delicious things inside your mouth. It happened so quickly, one moment your looking at his pictures and the next you’re hearing him whisper I love you into your mouth.
Fuck, I love you.
It was such a sweet whisper, filled with desperation and following a hungry kiss, but it was enough to douse ice cold water over your whole body because as soon as you pushed him away, you saw the look in his eyes and it scared you.
He meant it.
Every time he told you that he loved you, he got this look in his eyes. As if electricity just rolled through his eyes and made them shine almost neon. As if he was discovering what heaven felt like, just by looking at you. Like you were his whole world and held his heart in your dainty hands. And when he told you two days ago, he had the exact same look in his eyes.
You could see he was shocked by his own confession, like it rolled off of his tongue without a warning but instead of admitting you were still in love with him as well, you felt the tears well up in your eyes because he just once again shattered your heart, without even trying very hard.
In the end, Rudy was leaving. You would be left as a memory inside his head, soon he’d forget his feelings, but you would be left with everything. The heartbreak. The sadness. The abandonment. The love. For a split second, you let yourself believe that one day was starting in that second, but with his murmur you were reminded that his career was just starting and his Hollywood life had no room for you.
“Breakfast really that bad, hon?”
You lifted your head from holding it up above your food and looked to see Penny sliding into the booth across from you. You cleared your throat, straightened your back and looked at your coffee, blinking a few times to get rid of the tears that were welling inside your eyes.
“Hi, Penny,” you said softly, giving her a smile.
Penny’s eyes stayed round as she nodded to your plate, “Not hungry?”
“My eyes are bigger than my stomach,” you said, relaxing into the booth.
“Honey… you haven’t touched it since it was brought out twenty minutes ago.”
You stared at Penny and she briefly tilted her head, you looked over her shoulder and saw Alec and Henning sitting in a booth across the restaurant, they both gave a little wave before Alec threw a piece of toast at Henning, starting an all out food war.
“I’m just not feeling well,” you tried to say, but it came out as a question.
Penny breathed in deeply before resting her arm on the table, her chin in the palm of her hand. “I feel like I have pretty good mother’s intuition, yeah?” she asked, “good relationship with my sons?”
Your eyebrows pulled together, wondering where Penny was going with this. You nodded slowly before she continued, “I don’t do a lot of meddling in their lives to make things easier, I let them work out problems, right?”
“Um,” you hummed, still confused as hell.
“I watched you and Rudy pine over each other for two years. I watched you two learn how to love, I was there for every fight, almost every happy moment.” Her soft smile faltered. “I didn’t tell Rudy how bad of an idea it was to break up with you, because I knew you two could do long distance. I saw you both fall apart and try to pick up the pieces.”
You chin wobbled at her words and you quickly looked away. Along with Henning, Penny was another person you didn’t talk about your heart break with because she was Rudy’s mom. You had your own to run too and you never wanted to put her in an awkward position, but her words were really hitting you square in the chest.
“Honey, I can’t sit back and watch you two do this to one another.”
“He’s leaving,” you whispered. “He’ll forget about me.”
Penny went silent for a moment, and you could have sworn she was agreeing with you in the midst of the silence until she said your name softly. “Y/N, he hated this pretty girl for about three months. When they ended things, his one explanation was, and I quote, ‘She wasn’t Y/N’.”
You looked up at her, surprised but Penny wasn’t. She offered a half smile and slid out of her seat. She stood next to you and kissed your head, “give him a chance.”
You looked at her as she stepped away, heading back to her sons. You sighed, her words leaving your brain feeling jumbled. Instead of her easing your on going mental war, it only made it worse and you ended up just not touching your breakfast and going to work with your head in the clouds.
“Listen, I gotta tell you something, but I don’t think you’re going to care.” Kennedy said as you sat in your family room and watching some TV.
You two had been on the phone for the last twenty minutes. It was late evening and your parents were out at dinner with friends, you didn’t really feel like being social so you opted out of meeting some friends at a bar and Kennedy had just walked into the bar because you could hear the music in the background. “What’s up?” you asked, laying down on the couch.
“Tucker is here, wrapped around some girl.” Kennedy said with hesitation clear in her voice.
There was no blow, no hurt that rippled through your chest because technically you two weren’t together. It almost made you feel better that Tucker was with someone else, so you didn’t have to feel guilty for being stuck in your feelings about Rudy.
“Good,” you murmured, “maybe now I wont have to have the ‘we shouldn’t see each other anymore’ speech.”
“That would be ideal,” Kennedy said and sighed. “Are you sure you’re okay, Y/N?”
“I’m good,” you lied. You just wanted to be alone tonight.
“Rudy’s here,” she said softly. “You should come out.”
“I just want to be alone,” you said and tried to give your tone a bit more pep. “Listen, have fun tonight, okay?”
“Yeah,” Kennedy sounded unconvinced but you two hung up.
Penny’s words rang deeply inside your head and had been doing so all day. You were almost over it, over the self doubt and the sadness and heartbreak, but you needed one last night before you started to pick yourself up again. You didn’t see a light at the end of the tunnel, but one day you would. Soon, Penny would see that you and Rudy weren’t meant to be.
The idea of a future without Rudy in your life made tears well in your eyes.
I’m not ready for that…
You groaned and sat up. You made your way into the kitchen and grabbed out bottle of wine, but when you started uncorking it the doorbell rang. You first thought was that it was the girls coming to your rescue because you guys never allowed each other to wallow alone. Then the thought of Jamie flickered across your mind because you knew Kennedy would flap her lips to him and he would fly to you, but when you opened the door you realized you were completely wrong.
“Hey,” Rudy breathed, shoving his hands into the front pockets of his jeans and looking at you.
“Rudy,” you stumbled over his name, confused. “What’re you doing here?”
Rudy stood in front of you in dark jeans and one of his old high school soccer sweatshirts, his light hair still unruly but he had shaven and his cheeks looked smooth. His eyes looked tired as he looked down at you, breathing in your sweats and t-shirt. For a split second, you wondered if his mom spoke to him and if she did, what did she say to him?
“Kenn, uh, she told me you were staying in tonight,” he said, as if that gave him a good excuse as to why he was standing on your porch at 10:30 at night when all of your friends, plus his co-star, was at a bar in town.
Remembering Chase, you looked around him to see if his friend was in his truck, but no one was there, so you looked back at him. Rudy closed his eyes and breathed out in a heavy puff of air, when he pried them back open he stared at you and began to crumble.
“I just,” He groaned, “fuck.”
You stomach swirled nervously as you held onto the doorknob, steadying yourself. He pulled a hand from his pocket and he touched his stomach, “I just gotta say something, then I’ll go. I’ll leave you alone.”
You went to say his name, tell him not to bother because you couldn’t stomach it. You didn’t want to hear about how he still loves you, or how he couldn’t continue believing in one day because either way you would be left heart broken. He tells you he loves you, then what? Long distance?
“I’m not giving up on us, I can’t give up, Y/N.” he breathed, as if his words knocked the air out of his lungs and he was struggling to breathe as he looked at you. His blue eyes searching yours. “I know you think I have but forgetting you would be impossible, learning to unlove you is like me trying to learn how to perform brain surgery, it’s just, it’s impossible, Y/N. It’s never going to happen.”
Your bottom lip quivered as a barely there smile touched his face, hanging a hand on the doorframe. “Rudy,” you whispered.
“I don’t expect you to love me the same way you did when we were kids, you have walls up and your guarded and scared, but I’m going to keep pushing. I’m going to break down these walls, you will love me unconditionally again.” He said, bringing his free hand to his chest, touching the space where his heart lay. “I refuse to give up on the way I feel about you, because fuck the distance. If I have to fly out every month to see you, or fly you to sets, I don’t give a fuck anymore, Y/N, because I love you.”
Tears rolled down your cheeks and you quickly wiped them away.
“I’m not standing here, expecting you to tell me you feel the same way, because I know it’s going to be a fight.” He reached out and touched his hand to your chin, tilting your eyes up to look at him. “Baby, if you want to date other people then that’s fine, but they better be prepared to fight for you, because we both know I love to play dirty and I’ll do whatever it takes to make us happen.”
Stunned. Shocked. Astounded. All of the above was how you felt by his words. Rudy’s thumb brushed over your cheekbone as he took you in. No words passed between you two for a few seconds, his words ringing around inside of your head.
Rudy stepped closer and leaned down, your eyes fluttering closed as his face neared yours. You felt the soft glide of his lips in the corner of your mouth. It was soft, a barely there kiss but your heart fluttered so deeply you felt it in your toes. He smelled delicious, like his musky cologne mixed with the Alaskan fresh air. He smelled like Rudy and it warmed your body.
When he pulled away, his fingers dragged down your jaw and over your neck, sending goosebumps throughout every inch of your skin. He was still wearing his gentle smile when he turned away from you, leaving you melting on the floor because you believed every gentle threat in his words.
Rudy was about to give the fight of his life, and he wasn’t letting you go so easily.
Childhood Friends… Pope Heyward
Summary • You have been in love with Pope Heyward since you first met him when you were younger. But there’s one or two problems. Or so you think. He doesn’t like you. Does he?
Warnings • Swearing. Underage drinking.
AT EIGHT YEARS old you first met Pope Heyward. The concept of Outer Banks at such a young age seemed like a dream for you. Never ending beaches. Hot weather practically all the time. Surfing and swimming at your beck and call. It was a stark change from living in Minnesota.
The house you moved into was a small two story house next to one almost identical. And the day you had moved in a boy came knocking at the door. He seemed around your age and held a pie dish in his hands seemingly quite nervous. Your parents were upstairs unpacking so you opened the door hoping maybe you could make a friend.
“My mum made me bring this pie for you since we’re neighbours, here you go.” He kept his eyes trained on the ground then handing you the pie and scurrying back home before you could even take a breath. Your face dropped as he ran off but you felt determined to make him a friend, after all you were neighbours so how hard could it be since you’d see him almost all the time.
A few days later your mum wanted to buy some groceries rather than living off of takeaway food for any longer and opted for going to Heywards shop. Which ended up being your neighbours store.
You wandered through the store while your mum chatted with Heyward and eventually stumbled upon the boy who ran away sitting on the floor and reading a comic.
“Spider-Man’s really cool.” You had said sitting down next to him as his head snapping to the side suddenly looking from his marvel comic to you. It was a surprise he didn’t get whiplash.
“Really? I think so too.” The boy gushed about the hero while you sat listening. Then your mum called you from the front of the store and you pouted sad you could hang out with your new friend any longer.
Then the next thing you knew the eight year old boy was dragging you both to your feet and taking you to the candy area. He handed you a chocolate bar with a cheeky grin. “Don’t tell my dad.”
You nodded and giggled before rushing off to your mum and looking back at your new friend happily. Your parents invited the Heywards round for weekly dinners and alternated between houses becoming good family friends which only strengthened you and Popes friendship.
After that began it was an almost daily thing for you to hang out. You and Pope were attached by the hip. You went on your bikes together. Even took kids surfing lessons together. Though Pope practically already knew how to surf since he was raised on the water.
As you grew older you would do your homework together with the Heyward boy often helping you with the subjects you struggled in while you helped him with the things he struggled with.
Eventually you offered to help with the shop to pass time and hang out with your friend and at this point the Heywards were like family to you.
When you were both ten years old Pope had the idea to make a tree house. And though not the best considering it ended up just a rickety platform balancing on branches with ladders either side of it, it still worked. The tree overhung both houses back gardens with its trunk positioned just on the edge of your garden.
You met two more goofs that year. JJ and John B. The two Js was what you called them at first. You became fast friends with their long hanging bond similar to yours with pope. You fit like a lock and a key together. However you never showed the Pogues it because it was just you and Popes little space.
You spent a lot of time up there just staring up at the stars of reading. Pope liked to talk about all his hopes and dreams while you were there and you listened.
“Y/N, do you think I’ll be able to get into a good college. Like for forensic pathology.” He asked as you laid on the ‘treehouse’ could you even call it that.
“Pope you are the smartest person I know. So it’s unlikely that you won’t get into anywhere you want.”
“I know it’s just—I don’t think my dad can afford it so I’ll need to get a scholarship. There’ll be be hundreds of people competing for it. I’m just a drop in the ocean to them.” He ranted and you could hear the stress in his voice. This isn’t something someone as smart and determined as Pope should have to stress about was all you thought. He deserved so much while people who deserved so much less got fed with a silver spoon up in figure eight.
“They’d be dumb not to let you in. I don’t see how you wouldn’t. I have faith in you but I will also do whatever it takes to get you in. I’ll pay for your tuition myself if I have to. Or I’ll find some dirt on the dean and—”
“I’d rather not have my acceptance be a product of your blackmailing ways Y/N but thankyou and I’m not letting you pay for my tuition.” He laughed. It was the melodic sound that rung in your ears that made you smile and turn your head away from the stars and towards him. The small lights you had hanging from the tree branches were bouncing off of his beautiful chestnut skin. His eyes were a shade of dark honey brown that simmered in the light. He was amazing in every single way.
Your fourteen year old self was starting to realise what you had been oblivious to the whole time. You would do anything for Pope. He was your ride or die. And you hoped you were his.
However when Kiara came in was when things went weird between you and Pope. She waltzed in in all her kook glory looking like a goddess. So of course you couldn’t blame the boys when suddenly all their attention was on her and her beautiful brown wavy hair or golden cocoa skin that glimmered in the sunlight. You couldn’t figure out whether she was just born lucky with amazing genetics or whether she was a vampire like from Twilight. Either way, Pope Heyward fell and he fell hard that year. At work he always spoke about her and it was slowly killing you inside. Every time he mentioned it you swore you heard your heart break and crack into more pieces.
You wished you could tell him. But you would be putting your friendship on the line. It would be selfish to tell him when he clearly wasn’t interested.
Instead of moping over an unattainable crush you attempted to move on. And to everyone’s surprise started flirting back with JJ. He was always shooting his shot like he did with Kie and tourons at keggers but normally you never flirted back. You thought somehow within your skewed logic it would work and you would be over Pope. Like the saying fake it till you make it. But it just bought your thoughts back to how it wasn’t Pope.
The Heyward boy started to pay more attention to it. He got a weird feeling in his stomach everytime he saw you laughing at JJs jokes and not his or just talking to each other. He stared every time you flipped your long brunette hair over your shoulder and looked flawless or would saunter off back into the chateau for a drink.
His interest turned from anyone to you within a second of a word coming from you pink lips. But you had convinced yourself he wasn’t interested and you were oblivious to his newfound feelings. And so he stayed blind as he had been before to yours.
“HEY WHAT’RE YOU doing over here, lil red.” JJs nickname had originated from the fact that red was your favourite colour. You had even dressed up as little red riding hood one year for Halloween which sparked the full nickname. It was sweet but in no way anything more than a friendly nickname. Although Pope begged to differ. You sat leaning against the wooden poll on the wooden floor of the dock. Your arms wrapped around your legs pulling them close to your chest giving you a sense of comfort as you stared at the sunset across the marsh.
You turned to the blond sending him a small smile before turning back to the sinking blends of fluorescent pink and oranges blurring into one beautiful mess in the sky. “Watching the sunset.”
“Mind if I watch too?” He asked settling down beside you and resting his arms on his knees. You nodded. It turned away from the sky.
You heard the laugh of Pope from behind you and turned this time you turned away to look seeing Pope laughing with Kie that just sparked jealousy in your stomach. He looked so happy with her.
“So what’s the deal with that?” JJ asked from beside you and you turned to him confusion splattering on your features which were orange from the light hitting of the setting sun.
“What are you talking about?”
“I’m talking about the long glances, more like stares really and when you tell a joke you always look to Pope first. You look at him like he’s the best thing in the world. Not to mention you randomly starting to flirt with me. I’m a professional ladies man. I notice these things. You’re not interested in me, it’s Pope.” He blurted out and you sat rubbing a hand over your face with a sigh.
“I don’t do any of that.” JJ have you a look which you shrugged at. “Look I—I did, but I don’t anymore.”
“You sure about that?” JJ kept his stare on you as you shuffled uncomfortably before sighing.
“I just wish he could just like me back, but he never will he’ll always like Kie and I don’t wanna be jealous of them cause then I’ll be a terrible friend but… I can’t help it.”
“Lil red, I know you might not believe me but I think Pope does like you. A lot. I’ve seen the way he looks at you. It’s not just some friendly look.” He places his hand on your shoulder rubbing it softly and you send him a tight lipped smile.
“Maybe he does, I doubt it though. And people say girls are complicated. You boys are just as complicated.” You teased bumping his shoulder as he let go of yours. “But anyway we’re forgetting about the most important rule ever. No pogue on pogue macking.”
JJ snorted shaking his head. “Don’t bring up that bullshit rule. I know that if anyone of you showed interest in me it would be out of the window.”
“I’m not particularly a rule breaker unlike you.”
“Rules are made to broken but you’re just boring Lil Red.” You gasped and turned to your friend.
“No I am not. Take it back.” You glared at him jokingly.
“What’re you gonna do?”
You raised your eyebrows and then pushed the boy off the dock thinking you’d suceeded for a slip second until he grabbed your shoulders and pulled you in too.
Pope watched the two of you laughing and talking for a while without you realising and then he saw you both fall in the water together laughing and looking like you belonged together. He shook his head slightly as he looked back to Kie who stared with worried eyes.
“You okay Pope?”
“Yeah, yeah I’m fine just thinking.” Kie nodded going back to talking to John B until a shout erupts and they both turned to see JJ and you in the water. Pope was already looking.
“Lil red what the fuck?” He laughed shaking off his hair while you rung your own out still looking amazing to Pope.
“You said I was boring.” You shrugged chuckling and then screeching as you were pushed back under the water.
“I’m honestly surprised they’re not together yet.” Kie laughed looking at the two other boys beside her.
“You think they like each other?” Pope asked worry pinched in his eyebrows. It was one thing for him to think it but for Kie to confirm his thoughts made his stomach churn.
“Well yeah, I mean look at them.”
Pope was looking at them. And he saw it clear as day. You and him were never going to happen.
You breathed heavily as you and JJ walked up the steps to the docks. “Hey I know what we can do to help get your mind off of Pope for a night.”
THE PARTY HAD started two hours ago and was roaring with teens, kooks and Pogues alike hung together for one night filled with truce, beer and weed.
He had left you a few minutes before to pursue a girl of course while you sat around a bonfire staring at the embers that floated into the midnight sky. But you were still thinking about him. He was stuck in your thoughts like superglue. You’d hoped that maybe alcohol would help loosen you up and get you out of your head but being alone and drunk made it worse.
Pope stood by Kie as you sat at the fire by yourself. Now was his chance to tell you and maybe you would like him back but if you didn’t then maybe it would be less embarrassing since you were drunk. However he was not drunk since he abstained from the beer despite the multitudes of parties they had. He was the designated driver type.
“I’m gonna go over to Y/N.” Kiara nodded before she continued talking to a random boy that sat next to her.
He walked across the sand catching your attention as you snapped your head up to see him heading your way.
You were surprised he left Kie.
“You looked a little lonely so I’m giving you company.”
“Oh Thankyou. My saviour.” You said jokingly. Taking a swig of beer you examined the boys face. It twitched with nerves as he sat next to you and fiddled with his fingers.
He looked up at you with a small smile. “Y/N, I—”
“God, girls around here really have a good left hook.” JJ groaned holding his face sitting down next to you on the log interrupting Pope who he hadn’t noticed.
Then JJ looked up to see Pope sitting there awkwardly and you almost laughing at the fact that he got punched by a girl which never happened before. “Oh shit sorry I didn’t realise…”
“Realise what?” You asked shaking your head cluelessly before you dragged yourself up. “I need another drink.”
JJ tried to stop you but before he knew it you were at the keg with him following after.
“Uh, Lil red, I think Pope might’ve been about to tell you he liked you.”
“Wait, what? Really?” You almost dropped your beer as your hands went slack in shock but you quickly gripped it tight swallowing some. Pope stared into as you had walked away from him with JJ following. Of course he was going after you because like Kie said, they liked each other. He wanted to see if he could forget, so he did something he would probably regret.
“I’m pretty sure I mean he looked like he was going to. I really need to talk to him…” The blond trailed off as he stared at something behind him.
“What is it?” You were about to turn around until JJ held your shoulders in place until your shoved them off and saw what you never wanted to see.
Pope was kissing a girl. Not Kie though. It was just a random girl who he was kissing. Your eyes burned with tears as you turned to JJ scoffing.
“Yeah he definitely likes me doesn’t he.” You choked back a sob shoving the beer into JJs hand and running off into the trees.
Pope has pulled away just in time to see it and instant regret filled his stomach.
“Pope, buddy, what did you do?” JJ asked softly as Pope looked at his walking away from the random girl who looked taken aback.
“I’m so sorry.” He apologised and she rolled her eyes walking off. “I don’t know what was going through my head, one second I was at the fire the next I was kissing a random girl.”
“Look, bro, just go find her and explain everything.”
“Yeah, I’ll—I’ll do that.”
You had walked the farthest you could from the party, still bare foot since your shoes were in the van and John B had the keys. You were leaning against a tree trunk when you decided to go to the one place that would comfort you most despite reminding you of him.
You went straight home taking 20 minutes to walk down the cold desolate roads that were dark by this time. The first thing you did was get ice cream from the freezer before making your way to the tree house and wrapping yourself in the blankets befor leaning against one of the many pillows stored there. You listened to the gentle breeze above rustling the leaves of the blooming trees and the crickets in the distance and felt the gentle swaying of the platform beneath you.
This was your comfort place. It was the only place you felt like this since it was where you created all your favourite memories with Pope Heyward. The unattainable boy who had always been by your side.
By the time Pope made it home it was completely dark but he knew exactly where you would be. He made his way to his backyard and saw your small figure and made his way up. You sat up quickly and almost burst into more tears after seeing him.
“Pope what are you doing here?” You asked as he climbed up the ladder.
“I came to check up on you…” He sighs and sits down next to you. “And I came to say that that kiss was a big mistake.”
“Why—what?” You looked at the boy in confusion.
“I like you. I know we’ve been best friends forever and I hope this doesn’t make it weird but that’s the truth. I kissed the girl to see if I could forget about you which in hindsight was really stupid. And you probably hate me.”
You looked at him with glossy eyes and smiled.
“Yeah that was stupid if you thought you could get over me.” You laughed which died down when you turned to him looking more serious. “But I don’t hate you. It’s not like we were dating.”
“I was thinking…we could change that.” Pope tells you and you raise your eyebrows, a growing smile on your face.
“Hmm okay. Date. This friday. On the beach. You and me?” You asked and his eyes lit up feeling slightly surprised at the forwardness.
“Isn’t it supposed to be me asking you out?” He asked teasingly.
“It’s the twenty first century pope get with it.”
“Of course. And I would love to go on a date with you.”
“Good.” He then jumped on top of you in all your blankets and you let out a shriek. “Oh my god, Pope are you trying to simultaneously give me a heart attack and break this thing?”
“Not really, but if it happens then oh well.” He feigned nonchalance for a second breaking into a grin as you slapped his arm.
“Watch it mister. Or I’ll reconsider that date.”
“Okay, I’m sorry Y/N.”
You sighed contently as he wrapped you up in his arms, both of you under the blankets and the stars. You could definitely get used to this.
Note • In honor of simping for Pope and jd day, year, decade and century i’ve written this cause he’s a cutie and I love him. This was kinda anticlimatic but 🤷♀️
Word Count • 3333
(Rafe x reader)
Warnings: cursing, underage drinking
A warm, calloused hand grabbed mine. Rafe. He gave me an urgent look, and I glanced around me to check that no one was watching before following him away from the party and into the trees on the edge of the beach. As soon as we were out of sight, his lips were on mine and his hands were all over my body.
Shamefully, this was a pretty common occurrence. I’d been hooking up with Rafe for a couple of months now, and I still wasn’t sure if the amazing sex was worth the guilt- he was basically the pogues’ worst enemy. But it was easy to forget about my friends and just about everyone else when I was with him.
He was clearly drunk, his kisses more sloppy than usual, all tongue and teeth and raw passion he was normally too controlled to possess. I kissed him back, matching his enthusiasm. My arms reached up around his neck, needing to be as close to him as possible. His hands explored my body, sliding beneath my loose shirt to massage my breasts through the thin material of my bra. I let out a light moan into his mouth, which only seemed to provoke him further. He unclasped my bra, and I helped him remove it from underneath my top. At least this way, I’d be half decent if we got caught. One hand paid attention to my tits, the other slid lower until he reached the button on my shorts. For a second, he paused and broke the kiss.
“You want this, right?” he always asked, as if he was concerned I had somehow grown a conscience since we had last seen eachother.
“You know I do,” I replied, and pushed the already unbuttoned shirt off his shoulders to fully appreciate the toned torso in front of me.
“What the fuck?” and enraged, all too familiar voice interrupted us. I pushed Rafe off me, and met Kie’s horrified eyes.
“I can explain, Kie, please just don’t tell the others…” but my voice trailed off as Pope, JJ and John B approached Kie. It took them a second to register what was happening.
“Oh my god-“
“Are you serious?”
The same expression played out on all of their faces, and I knew that I had done something unforgivable.
“Guys, come on, please just don’t-“ I couldn’t get out a sentence before they interrupted me.
“You realise he’s a kook, right? A kook who hates all of us,” Kie said.
“He’s a total douche, what were you thinking?” John B cut in.
I didn’t know what to say. Excuses ran through my head, but nothing would get me out of this.
I felt Rafe move behind me and I assumed he was gonna leave but instead he reached forward to hold my hand. His palm was warm against mine. He gave my hand a squeeze before letting go.
“It’s my fault. I was using her. Did you really think any of this meant anything to me?” He cast a glance my way and winked. He was really trying to cover for me. And by the looks of my friends’ faces, it was working- all their anger was now directed at him. “Now, if you’ll excuse me, there’s a keg over there with my name on it.” He attempted to push through Pope and JJ, but JJ pushes him back.
He tried again. This time, JJ swung back and punched him in the nose. “Fuck you.” he spat, and shoved Rafe away from him.
For a moment, I was terrified that Rafe would turn around and retaliate, but instead he looked back at me for a second before leaving.
“I’m so, so sorry. I’m an idiot, I shouldn’t have trusted him or even let him come near me,”
“You are an idiot- my hand hurts now and it’s all your fault,” JJ being sarcastic was a good sign at least.
“Come on, let’s go get you a drink,” Kie slung an arm around my shoulders and we walked towards the rest of the party.
They would probably be angry with me again in the morning, but for now everyone was drunk enough to let it slide, and to blame Rafe instead of me.
Normally I’d be passed out as soon as I got home after a party. But not tonight.
I couldn’t stop thinking - about whether my friends would forgive me, whether I should tell the the truth, and most importantly about Rafe. Part of me was starting to think that maybe he’d meant what he said- that he really was just using me. He hadn’t called or texted since the party, and I was a serious overthinker.
A loud thud against my window startled me just as I was beginning to drop off. I looked over. Rafe.
He was trying to slide open my window far enough to get inside, but doing a terrible job.
I rushed over to help, sliding the window up and pulling him inside. He almost fell, but I just about caught him, nearly ending up in the floor myself. We sat on the edge of my bed.
“What are you doing here?” I whispered, very aware of my parents sleeping in the room across the hall.
He just smiled, and leaned in to kiss my lips. Slower than before, more gentle and less desperate. His teeth grazed my lower lip, biting gently. I ran my hands over his chest, his shoulders, his back, fingertips memorising every dip and curve. He pushed me back so I was lying on my bed, his body over mine.
For a second, he broke the kiss, “Did you really think I wouldn’t come back to finish what we started earlier?” I barely managed to let him finish the sentence, before kissing him again, hard.
If the pogues found out about this, I’d have no excuse.
Summary: JJ Maybank has had his fair share of one-night stands and random hookups. He never considered himself a relationship kind of guy. He wasn’t sure if it was his fear of commitment or the years of being told he wasn’t good enough, but he was content with his current situation. So, what happens when JJ, the troublemaker of Kildare, finds himself face to face with a girl that could change his whole outlook on love and relationships. Will sparks fly, or will the two crash and burn?
Warnings: None :)
word count: 1.9k
A/N: Hello to anyone who is reading this. First off, thank you for reading, it means a lot to me. Second I finally finished writing and editing the first official part of this story. I have no idea how long it is going to be, I guess it will be until I run out of ideas. As always feedback (both positive and negative) are welcome. Enjoy! :))
It was warm the first week of June in the Outer Banks, the sun shining hot but a cool, ocean breeze made for a perfect day on the island. It was the last day of school and everyone on the island was excited to kickstart their summer. The pogues were no exception. They were throwing a ‘the start of the best summer of our lives’ kegger at the boneyard later that evening and everyone, even the kooks, were buzzing about it, excited about the adventures that await them.
The students of Kildare County High School were flooding the streets, the last bell of the year having just rang, signaling the start of their heavily anticipated vacation. Ella was walking out of the school when her two best friends, Grace and Sophia, linked arms with her while strolling out into the summer sun.
“I cannot wait to spend my days on the beach with my two best friends - taking the boat out, tanning, catching a few waves, it’s going to be great!” Grace told her friends excitedly. All three having just got their license in the past year meant that this summer was going to be filled with many adventures.
“And who knows, maybe this will be a summer of love”, Sophia chimed in, looking pointedly at Ella, as she was always brushing guys off, never giving them the time of day like her boy-crazed friends. Her friends wanted Ella to have a chance at a happiness she had to experience. They wanted her to see that it was okay to let other people in besides those she cared about, they wanted her to fall in love. Ella was a beautiful girl, light brown hair that reached just above her abdomen, tanned skin and hazel eyes. She had a nice figure with a lean, athletic build. When she went to parties, she definitely attracted the attention of the other gender, but she was focused on spending her time with her friends and not worrying about what some boy, who was probably too drunk to truly mean his flirtatious comments, thought of her.
“Guys, guys, I am completely content spending my free time with the two people I can tolerate. I don’t need a boy to keep me happy, not when I have my girls” Ella proclaimed as she pulled her friends in closer, smiling wide. “Besides, I just got a new job, so between my time there and my time with you guys and my family, there will be no time for boys”.
The two mumbled a “whatever you say” and a “sure” under their breath as they shared a look between themselves, Ella just rolling her eyes and smiling in response pulling them along. The trio continued to walk down the street to Grace’s house as she lived the closest to the school. Grace didn’t have a huge house, but it was big enough and she had a pool, so it was the most common place for the three to hang out. As they waltzed into her house, they beelined for the kitchen, grabbing snacks and drinks and running upstairs to sprawl out across Grace’s bedroom. They laid there, playing on their phones and listening to music, contemplating how they should spend their first night of many together.
Sophia’s phone went off, signaling she got a text. She sprung up from her current position on the floor, “The pogues are having a party down at the boneyard tonight, said we should come, and I quote ‘start the summer off right’. We have to go; everyone is going to be there, and I think it could be fun”. The other two giggled while sharing a knowing look. Sophia only wanted to go because she knew that a certain kook, who goes by the name William and is known to be a partier, would be there. He was Sophia’s current obsession and she had been trying to get him to notice her for a while now, it was only time before she gave up and moved onto someone new. But they agreed nonetheless and started planning outfits, each taking turns in the bathroom and routing through Grace’s closet.
The Pogues sat around the goofing off just waiting to kick off their event for the evening. The three boys were joking around on who (if anyone) they were going to hook up with while Kie just sat and rolled her eyes at their childish antics. Seeing this they all turned on her, ready to give her a hard time.
“Oh, don’t be so smug there Kie, you have guys practically drooling over you at these parties” John B smirked at his friend. And it was true, Kie had the ability to attract any guy should she choose. Having long brown hair with a practically flawless complexion and a curvy figure, it was no surprise that she would have boys falling at her feet. During boneyard parties, she could usually be found sitting on a log talking to some touron, explaining the importance of our environment and judging him based on how he responds to her during these conversations.
“Hush, it’s not like it really matters anyway with you three goons hanging around. Most guys assume I’m with one of you anyways with the way you all act” she stated with narrow eyes, focusing more on John B and JJ than Pope as those two were always super touchy with her when they were drinking, even though it was strictly platonic, it was just their way of showing affection. None of the boys would admit it but if Kie gave them the opportunity, they would all go for it, which is why they implemented the rule “No Pogue on Pogue macking”. This rule would essentially make sure that no boundaries were crossed and so that no feelings could ruin their friendship.
The Pogues made their way down to the boneyard, keg in hands, ready to kick the night off and have some fun. They set up everything and started drinking themselves, waiting for people to start arriving. Pope always declines the drinks his friends offer to him, saying he wants to keep the signal clear. And they didn’t mind, they had just as much fun with him and it was nice to know that at least one of them would be coherent should things hit the fan. He didn’t mind either, he liked being able to look after his friends and be able to retell the nights events and fill in what the others can’t remember. So, when people started showing up and the drinks started getting passed around, the pogues were ready for a night to remember.
Ella, Grace and Sophia finally finished getting ready, maybe having had a few drinks in the meantime wasn’t their smartest idea as it just prolonged the already tedious process of preparing for a night out. It was now around 9:30pm and they were making their way to the boneyard, walking of course as they weren’t going to risk drinking and driving. The three were giggling at something one of them had said as they arrived. Seeing an open log around the bonfire, they made a beeline towards it in hopes to claim it before someone else did. They all sat down together still laughing, happy to be spending the night with each other.
“I’m gonna go get a drink, do you want anything?” Grace asked as she stood up to make her way to the keg. “Ooh I’ll come with, Ella do you want one?” Sophia chimed in also standing up. Ella nodded and told the two that she would stay where she was so that their seats didn’t get taken. As the two walked towards the keg to get drinks Ella smiled to herself; she was happy with her life. She had great friends, a new job to give her a little extra cash, what more could she want? However, she couldn’t help but feel like there was something out of place, a small hole in her life just waiting to be filled.
Sitting where her friends left her, Ella felt eyes on her. She looked around and made eye contact with her admirer, it was a boy she hadn’t seen before, most likely on vacation. He smiles at her and starts to make his way over, sitting down next to her. “What’s a pretty girl like you doing here by yourself?” he asks in an attempt at flirting. Ella smiles politely at him before replying, “I’m here with friends, they just went to get us drinks”, hoping that would be the end of the conversation. Unfortunately, she was mistaken, the boy continued to talk to her, though she had to admit, he was kind of cute. He was tall with dark skin and green eyes that reflected the light from the fire beautifully.
“Can I get your name beautiful?”
“It’s Ella” she replied as she tucked a strand of hair behind her ear.
“Very nice to meet you Ella, I’m Will” he said while sticking his hand out for her to shake.
“Nice to meet you too. Do you live around here? I don’t think I’ve seen you around school before.”
“I moved here a few years ago. I go to school up on Figure 8.”
Putting puzzle pieces together and realizing that this is the same kid her best friend has been crushing on, she becomes flustered and stands up in a hurry.
“I’m so, so sorry, but I, I have to go – uhm yeah” Ella rushed out as she got up to leave, she wouldn’t dare go after someone who her friends were interested in, that just wasn’t cool.
“Where are you going? I thought we were having a good time” He exclaimed, getting up to follow her. Not wanting to cause a scene, Ella quickly pivoted on her heels and started to lightly jog around the beach looking for her friends. Eventually loosing Will in the crowd, she focused on hunting down her friends who were taking an awfully long time to get drinks. Ella trekked across the sand, keeping her eyes peeled for anyone she may know. Not watching where she was going, she bumped into something hard, or rather someone.
“I am so sorry! I wasn’t watching where I was going. I’m just trying to find my friends; I didn’t mean to run into you!” Her sentences coming out in jumbled mess as she tries to balance herself from the impact. The stranger grabs her arms to keep her steady making sure she was good before replying with a chuckle, sensing the girl’s nervousness, “it’s no big deal, not like it hurt.”
Ella’s cheeks flushed bright red before bringing her eyes up to meet those of the stranger she almost plowed down. When their eyes met, her breath caught in her throat, it felt as though time stood still. He was a tall, lean yet still muscular boy, skin starting to tan from the coastal sun. He had shaggy blonde hair and piercing blue eyes that seemed to look right through her soul. She couldn’t help but get lost in them, Will’s green eyes long forgotten. Realizing she was staring, she coughed slightly, cheeks flushing again, before apologizing once more and darting around the handsome boy to continue on her hunt for her friends, excited to tell them that maybe, just maybe she would be willing to experience a summer romance with a certain blue eyed stranger.
who decided mayward over heybank for jj and pope? i missed out on the vote :(
warning; ig it alludes to death, it’s fluffy until it’s angsty
summary; rafe loves y/n more than she’ll ever wrap her head around
word count; 2k+
based on incase you don’t live forever by ben platt
You put all your faith in my dreams
You gave me the world that I wanted
What did I do to deserve you?
“baby!” y/n looked over her shoulder, smiling widely and completely forgetting about the conversation she was previously immersed in when her eyes landed on a smiling rafe.
he jogged the short distance over to her and wrapped his long arms around her waist, lifting her off of the ground and twirling her in the air. the girl squealed, but it only made rafe laugh and smile even brighter before he set her back down.
“what’s got you so happy?” it wasn’t the rafe didn’t act like this around her, but it was something he often saved for less public occasions, and given their spot in the middle of a crowded beach, it shocked her slightly.
“my dad agreed to let me sit it on his meetings this week. he also told me this morning that i get to go to the bahamas with him next week for that trip he has planned.” y/n’s smile almost reached her ears by the time rafe stopped talking. she had never seen rafe so excited about something so mundane, and it made her heart soar.
“i’m so happy for you.” her voice was soft, but rafe heard every word spill from her lips. “i told you you could do it.”
he hugged her again, both of them smiling and laughing into each other. rafe was finally dipping his feet into the right pool, and was finding something worth his time. y/n always supported rafe’s dreams to implement himself in his father’s business, and now it seemed that it was all paying off.
“we can go celebrate by stealing wine out of my mom’s cellar and taking the boat out.” y/n’s lips were pressed close to rafe’s ear, her voice sending a chill down his spine.
“what did i do to deserve you?” he pressed his lips to her temple, careful not to make too much noise when he pulled away so she wouldn’t flinch at the sound.
“you’re perfectly yourself, rafe cameron.”
I follow your steps with my feet
I walk on the road that you started
I need you to know that I heard you, every word
rafe trailed her, digging his feet into the footprints she left in the sand behind her. he stayed close behind, but gave her a bit of space as she wandered the shore’s edge.
he held both of their shoes, one pair hanging from each of his hand while he watched the girl in front of him make irregular patterns in the sand with her feet.
rafe had lost track of how many topics she’d run through while she ranted about anything and everything. it started off with her mom dragging her to brunch again that morning, something she dreaded every sunday morning. now it was something about how her older sister was coming back to the island from college, and y/n would have to share the vodka stored away in the liquor cabinet.
she spun around on the balls of her feet, stopping in place and crossing her arms over her chest as she pouted at the boy behind her. he laughed gently, closing the distance between them and wrapping his arms around her waist.
“why are you pouting?” he kissed her lips, successfully getting her to suck in the lip that she had puffed out in a small pout.
“did you even hear anything i just said?” he smiled widely at the girl, a warmth spreading through his chest as he pressed his lips against her forehead.
“every word, princess.”
In case you don’t live forever, let me tell you now
I love you more than you’ll ever wrap your head around
In case you don’t live forever, let me tell you the truth
I’m everything that I am because of you
he doesn’t remember a time where he wasn’t filled to the brim with love for the girl. the girl that would sneak him through her window when either of them were having a bad night. the girl that would stay on the phone with him all night long when insomnia kicked his ass, even if she had a final the next morning.
the girl that would dance around her room in nothing but one of his shirts that was too big for her, holding the neck of a wine bottle and letting every melody flow through her body like she had made it herself. the girl that somehow fit in every bit of his life as if they were perfectly sculpted for one another.
but above all else, the sight of her laying on top of him, even if it was just her head in his lap while he mindlessly played with her hair, was his favorite sight. she looked up at him, eyes locking with the blue pair that had been trained on her for an unknown amount of time.
“you’re staring.” she whispered softly, but he just nodded. he did it often, and it came as a shock to nobody, but it still caught her off guard every single time. “what’s on your mind, cameron?”
she sat up, moving into the boy’s lap like a dance she’d committed to muscle memory. his hands found her hips quickly, and her arms snaked over his shoulders while her hand threaded itself into the hair on the back of his head.
“i love you more than you’ll ever wrap your head around.” she smiled widely at the confession, having heard the words drip from his tongue a few times before. the simple thread of words were something she never missed hearing rafe say before.
“i’ll never love another person or thing as much as i love you, rafe cameron.” he let the smallest laugh pass his lips as he stared at the girl in his lap, not an ounce of worry or dread found within him in that moment.
“I’m everything that I am because of you.” and it was true.
she’d shown him that life is not all about being on top, or having people reassure you that you’re doing great. she showed him that he’d never get any reassurance in life from others until he found it within himself. she showed him how to be happy on his own, and in turn allowed himself to be happy alongside the girl of his dreams.
I, I’ve carried this song in my mind
Listen, it’s echoing in me
But I haven’t helped you to hear it
“rafe, tell me what’s wrong.” she was confused, having watched the boy cry for the past hour without any indication of what had happened before he snuck through her window.
“everything’s just piling up, y/n.” she sighed then. she knew rafe buried his problems and his feelings. he buried them so deep he convinced himself that he was truly okay.
which only led these things to bubble over at some inevitable point, but y/n was always there to pick up the pieces. she held him, hand running up and down his back and thumb wiping away the tears on his cheeks.
“you can’t keep burying these things, rafe. you have to talk to me.” he nodded into her chest, knowing that he simply had to get better at opening up about things.
and he would do better. better for her and better for himself.
I’ve waited way too long to say
Everything you mean to me
he couldn’t believe what life had handed him. he couldn’t thank the universe enough for the girl they had perfectly built for him. he couldn’t believe that she had slummed it with him for the past three years, but he wouldn’t have taken a second of it back.
he couldn’t believe that life could take a complete 180 in mere hours. he couldn’t believe that one single moment of time, one bad decision, could bring him to this uncomfortable plastic chair, waiting for her name to ring through the waiting room.
his leg was bouncing so quickly it had stressed out topper enough to ask him to calm down, more than once. but how was he supposed to calm down when he had no idea what was going to happen?
had he waited too long? he knows he’d said ‘i love you’ enough times to last a lifetime, but he thought he’d be able to say it for a lifetime. he though that he’d have more time.
more time to tell her everything he loved about her. more time to watch her dance to songs even when her hips were affected by alcohol. time to hear her sing his favorite songs at an hour where they weren’t sure it was morning or nighttime anymore.
time to hear her laugh, even if it was at how bad his joke was. time to watch her eyes light up when he brought her coffee after a long night. time to listen to her read poems to him that she found on the internet. he thought he had time.
I have a hero whenever I need one
I just look up to you and I see one
I’m a man ‘cause you taught me to be one
he remembered the time his hands were shaking so bad that she had to tie his tie for him. he’d taught her how to do it one day after she begged him.
“it’ll be cute! i can tie your ties before you go off to work in the morning. or, i can tie our son’s ties before graduations and parties that he doesn’t want to go to.” rafe was smiling at her, wondering if she realized the rant she had fallen into.
“our son? you want to have kids, baby?” her cheeks tinted red as she realized what she had said.
“yeah, i mean, uh- is that what you want?” he kissed her forehead and then her lips, smiling widely when their foreheads pressed together.
“i want everything with you.”
she tied the tie quickly now, her fingers working with the fabric as though she’d done this for years. her hands smoothed the lapels of his jacket before she grabbed his shoulders softly.
“you’re going to be great, okay? just laugh at their awful jokes, and smile when you greet people. shake their hands firm enough to get a compliment on your grip, but not so much that they joke about you ripping their arm off.” rafe was nodding, taking in every bit of information that she offered him.
“okay, i think i got it.” she smiled widely and kissed his lips.
“you got this, baby. knock ‘em dead.”
In case you don’t live forever, let me tell you now
I love you more than you’ll ever wrap your head around
In case you don’t live forever, let me tell you the truth
I’m everything that I am
he cried when he saw her, needles in her arm and bandages wrapped around various parts of her body. her eyes were open, which only let him see how much pain she was in. to anybody else, it was nothing more than a tired or scared expression, but to rafe it was devastating.
he didn’t know how he was ever meant to get in a car again. how he could sit behind the wheel and look out of the shield of glass in front of him without remembering what the love of his life had to go through. he didn’t know if he’d make it out of this.
her parents left the room when rafe walked in, leaving him with a hug from her mother and a clap on the back from her father. he pulled a chair up next to her bed and held her hand in his tightly.
“i’ll be okay.” she whispered softly, trying to assure rafe that whatever was happening to her would end however it was meant to be.
“what if i’m not?” he looked up at her, all confidence that he had previously washed away within seconds.
“you’re going to be better than okay. whatever happens will happen, and you’ll live your life however you’re supposed to, okay?” she reached out to wipe away his tears, letting rafe see and feel how much her hand was shaking.
“baby.” he spoke softly, leaning into her touch and filling her hand with fresh tears.
“it’s going to be okay, rafe. i love you more than life itself, baby.” he choked out a sob at the words she picked out, the situation at hand playing into it all too well. “I love you more than you’ll ever wrap your head around.”
he smiled at the familiar words, though it didn’t make him cry any less.
“I’m everything that I am because of you, y/n.”
In case you don’t live forever, let me tell you the truth
As long as I’m here as I am, so are you
you interpret the ending, bbies
He’s playing checkers, she’s playing chess…2 steps ahead…
Kooks have never really trusted pogues, but you have gained the trust of some as you babysit and dogsit for them. After inviting JJ over as you are dogsitting, a necklace goes missing and who else would have taken it other than the infamous kleptomaniac, right?
Warnings: some curse words
Word Count: 2962
“I think someone’s mom is home!” You shout from the back door. After playing little game of hide and seek, Austin and Ava wanted to play in their treehouse, so you went inside and chilled out until their two-year-old sister, Aubrey, woke up.
“Okay! We will be out in a minute!” Ava shouted to you as she poked her head out the treehouse window. You rolled your eyes playfully before returning to Aubrey who was still a little groggy from her nap. All she wanted to do was lay in your arms and watch Trolls.
“How were they today, y/n?” Sadie asked you when she walked into her home.
A rosary with a Guardian Angel one side and the Archangel ST. Michael on the other! I bought this last year when I visited Rome and the Vatican.