this isn't what I usually post, but I've been thinking about this for some time and I wanted to share. This is something about life that I've learned through years of insecurity, depression, and more:
go absolutely apeshit.
you wanna throw a snowball at someone? go for it. you want to wake up and make some hot chocolate and bring it to school even though it's not That cold? godspeed bestie. dancing down the hallway even though there isn't any music playing? buying stickers to put on people or things that make you happy? just go for it.
I used to be so worried about other people's opinions that I pretty much just lived in my little shell and never did anything. My stomach was too flabby and chunky, I was too loud, or too quiet, or too polite, or not polite enough. I was absolutely miserable because I was spending all this time and energy trying to be a character in some made-up reality show that someone decided to call life. I don't really know what the breaking point for me was, but I finally said "no more." and that was probably the best thing I've ever done for myself.
don't hold anything back. take pictures of sunsets and sunrises and roads that are shimmering from rain. admire the way frost sparkles on the trees, or the way your friend or brother or mom smiles when something makes them happy. someone says you have too much of a gut, or your arms are too flabby, or you're too fat? just smile and say there's more of you to love. dance even though you aren't a dancer, because you just have so much energy and joy that's spilling out of you and you want to share it. wake up at midnight and bake cookies. blast your music in the car on your way to work. enjoy everything because everything is enjoyable
and if you can't? If you find you don't have the joy inside you to do all these things? start small. watch that little kid at the mall as she's fishing around in the fountain looking for coins. she's so young but she can already see that there is so much joy and excitement in the most mundane of places. get yourself a treat and share it with someone. start small, because it will help you be able to take bigger and bigger steps. and if you aren't able to go absolutely apeshit every day? that's ok. just try again tomorrow. joy isn't a class you take, or a job, or even a task to be marked off every day. it's a mindset, and it's powerful, and I encourage each of you to learn how to be joyful, in your own ways. it'll look different for everyone, but the end result is the same: a person who truly, genuinely, enjoys life and all the little adventures it brings.
if anyone would like to share their own experiences or even ask questions about this, my ask box is always open <3 I love you guys