#scotland Tumblr posts

  • winterwrites23
    28.09.2021 - 18 minutes ago

    Pranking with the bros

    This is a list of random headcanons about the UK+Ireland brothers when doing pranks because I’m 100% sure these five idiots do prank wars at least once a year. If they can’t be direct with sharing their affections for each other, might as well show their love by being absolute menaces. 

    Scotland is vicious with his pranks. He’s the one who tapes a mousetrap beside the light switch, fills hundreds of cups with water in the bedroom, unleashes a dozen of crickets in the house or hide a dead fish somewhere. It always ends up with at least one injury or a destroyed property. 

    England’s pranks are intricate and can be as vicious as Scotland if it’s aimed at said brother. His goal is more to scare the person, which can easily lead to disaster if gone wrong. He’s the one who puts a fake spider in the lampshade, fills the cupboard with ping pong balls, puts a transparent wrap at the doorway on eye level or sticks an air horn under the toilet seat.  

    If the prank is between England and Scotland, it usually ends up with a wrestling match and at least one broken chair. 

    Ireland's pranks are absurd and so random, it makes him unpredictable. It’s not aimed at the person, but at their surroundings. Unscrewing all the lightbulbs, moving the furniture by one inch, turning the picture frames upside down, wrapping a room in foil or cover the car with post-its.

    Wales normally doesn’t participate, preferring to watch from the sidelines and silently judging them. However, the moment he gets targeted, he becomes the pettiest and sneakiest prankster ever. Switching the salt with sugar, pouring water in their shoes, replacing the jelly of a donut with mayonnaise or covering the bar soap with clear nail polish. It’s not harmful, just inconvenient and annoying.

    The worst part is that Wales takes his time with his pranks. He doesn’t do it immediately after he’s targeted. No, he waits weeks, even months, before he jumps into action. The others become paranoid when he does nothing, knowing it will come when they least expect it.

    The brothers also show no restrain on using magic to their advantage. From a hex of making you screech like a banshee or an itching curse that gets worse the more you scratch to a jinx that makes you walk backward, the possibilities are endless.

    However, no one can use magic on the baby of the family: North

    Unless you want the wrath of the others.

    Having spent most of his life without magic, North relies on his wits and cunning to prank his brothers, and that makes him a terrifying opponent. His approach is similar to Wales in terms of sneakiness, but much more chaotic. He’s the one who puts hair dye in the shampoo bottle, builds a whole slingshot contraption that shoots pies, spreads oil on the floor with a bag of floor on the ceiling ready to drop or puts Lego around the bed in the middle of the night. 

    North is basically the embodiment of Home Alone.

    The others would try to bribe him to be on their team by offering him apple pies, his favourite dessert. It sometimes works but not before North plans a prank on them as thanks for the treat. 

    Overall, they’re a chaotic bunch of idiots <3

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  • adventuresofalgy
    28.09.2021 - 43 minutes ago

    Algy thoroughly enjoyed his wind-driven ride in the old downy birch tree, but after a while he began to feel hungry again, for he had only managed to eat a few rowan berries before the wind had defeated him.

    Fortunately there was a handsome cotoneaster growing close to the birch, and it was absolutely smothered in beautiful red berries which the other birds had not yet removed. A single hop and a flutter took Algy into the centre of the bush, where, seating himself comfortably, he began to eat a very hearty lunch, reflecting the while on Nature’s generosity towards fluffy (and other) birds.

    Algy was inevitably reminded of John Keats’ famous Ode, but despite the mellow fruitfulness which was so abundantly evident in his assistants’ garden this year, other aspects of the poem did not quite seem to fit the character of autumn in the wild west Highlands. Algy guessed that the young poet had had a more southerly clime in mind, for he knew that even back in Mr. Keats’ day the Hebridean coast and islands of Scotland were known for their stormy autumn weather. Algy recalled that entries for September days in James Boswell’s 1773 diary The Journal of a Tour to the Hebrides with Samuel Johnson (published in 1785) were full of observations such as “It was a storm of wind and rain; so we could not set out“... and very little seemed to have changed in that respect as the centuries had passed...

    However, the poem conjured up a splendid vision of plenty, albeit in a mythical land of warm sunshine, and Algy was happy to recite it for the benefit of the other birds while he munched the ripe red berries. Mr. Keats had got one thing right at least: the red-breast was indeed whistling from a garden croft, and Algy was thrilled to be hearing his wee friend’s song once again:

    Season of mists and mellow fruitfulness, Close bosom-friend of the maturing sun; Conspiring with him how to load and bless With fruit the vines that round the thatch-eves run; To bend with apples the moss'd cottage-trees, And fill all fruit with ripeness to the core; To swell the gourd, and plump the hazel shells With a sweet kernel; to set budding more, And still more, later flowers for the bees, Until they think warm days will never cease, For Summer has o'er-brimm'd their clammy cells.
    Who hath not seen thee oft amid thy store? Sometimes whoever seeks abroad may find Thee sitting careless on a granary floor, Thy hair soft-lifted by the winnowing wind; Or on a half-reap'd furrow sound asleep, Drows'd with the fume of poppies, while thy hook Spares the next swath and all its twined flowers; And sometimes like a gleaner thou dost keep Steady thy laden head across a brook; Or by a cyder-press, with patient look, Thou watchest the last oozings hours by hours.
    Where are the songs of Spring? Ay, where are they? Think not of them, thou hast thy music too - While barred clouds bloom the soft-dying day, And touch the stubble-plains with rosy hue; Then in a wailful choir the small gnats mourn Among the river sallows, borne aloft Or sinking as the light wind lives or dies; And full-grown lambs loud bleat from hilly bourn; Hedge-crickets sing; and now with treble soft The red-breast whistles from a garden-croft; And gathering swallows twitter in the skies.

    [Algy is quoting the famous poem To Autumn by the early 19th century English poet John Keats.]

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  • the-introverted-cinephile
    28.09.2021 - 1 hour ago

    A Lonely Manor

    The starting of every horror movie. Well, I am not moving in, with no neighbors around. Even though I dislike people, I am not gonna isolate myself and give Annabelle the chance to murder me.

    I have watched too many horror movies to make that mistake, thank you very much!

    Who am I kidding, there is no way I can afford this place anyway.

    In retrospect, this would be a cool place to die, or be murdered I suppose.

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  • judaspriested
    28.09.2021 - 1 hour ago
    #HEADCANON. #[ i contemplated haggis but it being scotlands national dish that's a little too obvious and easy of a choice ]
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  • factoidfactory
    28.09.2021 - 2 hours ago

    Random Fact #3,547

    Atheism is not a new phenomenon.

    Historical examples of atheists include:

    5th century BCE, Greece - Diagoras of Melos, a staunch opposer of religion at that time, is accused of blasphemy and has to flee Athens to escape a death sentence.

    480–406 BCE Greece - Euripides writes the play Bellerophon, wherein the main character explicitly states that gods don't exist.

    400s BCE Greece - Either Euripides or Critias write the satyr play Sisyphus, which features the claim that a clever man invented "the fear of the gods" in order to frighten people into behaving morally.

    Unknown date, Ancient Roman Empire -- An atheist gravestone is written, telling travellers that they should cease believing in afterlives and gods*.

    823-911 Iran - Ibn al-Rawandi deconverts from Islam and writes against religion. None of his works survive but we know about his opinions because of the surviving works that sought to counter them.

    1100s Iran -- Mathematician Omar Khayyam writes a poem deriding the Koran**.

    Circa 1200s Iceland - The Old Norse poem Sôlar lioð is written, which mentions men who turned away from Norse Paganism and "in themselves they trusted".

    Late 1200s Iceland - The Hrafnkell Saga is written, which features an atheist protagonist who is described as being goðlauss ("godless") and who explicitly says that "...it is folly to have faith in gods."

    1500s Italy - Menocchio, a well-liked miller is his small village, publicly declares that it was impossible for Jesus to have been born of a virgin mother, that Jesus was not divine, that much of the Gospel stories were fabrications, that immortality was impossible, and that God may be no more than a figment of human imagination. He is tried for heresy, convicted as an atheist, and burned at the stake.

    1546, France - Étienne Dolet is found guilty of atheism and is subsequently strangled and burned for the crime of unbelief.

    1500s Italy & France - Giulio Casare Vanini denies the immortality of the soul, says he believes that humans evolved from apes, and insists that religious teachings are false. He flees Italy but is caught in France, where he has his tongue cut out, is strangled, and then burned to death.

    1600s Poland - Kazimierz Łyszczyński harshly criticizes priests, argues that the Bible is false, and writes a treatise called The Nonexistence of God (Polish version found here). Christians have his tongue and mouth burned with hot irons, his hands burned over a slow fire, and finally his whole body is torched.

    1600s Edinburgh, Scotland - 20-year old Thomas Aikenhead (who had no criminal record), is hanged because he “maintained…that theology was a rhapsody of ill-invented nonsense…that the Holy Scriptures were stuffed with such madness, nonsense, and contradictions” and that Christ was an “imposter,” etc.

    1817 England - Percy Shelley, husband of Frankenstein author Mary Shelley, is denied custody of his children from his first marriage on the basis that he is an atheist (he was also expelled from university for that same reason, btw).

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    * "Do not pass my epitaph, traveller

    But having stopped, listen and learn, then go your own way

    There is no boat in Hades, no ferryman Charon

    No caretaker Aiakos, no dog Cerberus

    All we who are dead below

    Have become bone and ashes but nothing else

    I have spoken to you honestly, go on traveller

    Least even while dead I seem talkative to you"

    .

    ** The Koran! well, come put me to the test

    Lovely old book in hideous error drest

    Believe me, I can quote the Koran too,

    The unbeliever knows his Koran best.

    And do you think that unto such as you,

    A maggot-minded, starved, fanatic crew,

    God gave the Secret, and denied it me?

    Well, well, what matters it! believe that too.

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  • technicolourstation
    28.09.2021 - 4 hours ago

    Glenfinnan, Scotland // Glenfinnan Viaduct // (2021)

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  • pieniharmaakani
    28.09.2021 - 5 hours ago

    not me wikipedia surfing the history of my ancestral hick-as-fuck home region and being greeted with 'in the 80s beer gruel was named as the official parish dish'

    #the region also known as 'finland's scotland' if youve heard those jokes about stingy people
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  • zadsworld
    28.09.2021 - 5 hours ago

    Ma reine 👑 @dalida_officielle #dalida #buongiorno #goodmorning #bomdia #toronto #torontolife #torontofood That summer #NYC #mace #keepgoing💪 #buongiornocosì #buongiornouncazzo #buongiornissimo #beyhive #blacklivesmatter #Glasgow #scotland #blacklivesmatter✊🏽✊🏾✊🏿 #blackisking 👑 #paris ‏#artistas #degitalartist #france #Rome #dogitalart 😊 #artist #bokertov #artista #degitaldesign #nike (à Glasgow, United Kingdom) https://www.instagram.com/p/CUYBUHlodNp/?utm_medium=tumblr

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  • scotianostra
    28.09.2021 - 5 hours ago
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  • zadsworld
    28.09.2021 - 5 hours ago

    @chanelofficial #buongiorno #goodmorning #bomdia #toronto #torontolife #torontofood That summer #NYC #mace #keepgoing💪 #buongiornocosì #buongiornouncazzo #buongiornissimo #beyhive #blacklivesmatter #Glasgow #scotland #blacklivesmatter✊🏽✊🏾✊🏿 #blackisking 👑 #paris ‏#artistas #degitalartist #france #Rome #dogitalart 😊 #artist #bokertov #artista #degitaldesign #nike #edinburghchristmasmarket (à Glasgow, United Kingdom) https://www.instagram.com/p/CUX_p1xIFLJ/?utm_medium=tumblr

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  • miloutic
    28.09.2021 - 5 hours ago

    its a night to rewatch weirdmageddon in full

    #feeling incredibly nostalgic and am sick in bed anyhow so #might watch the dnd ep later since the last time i saw that was before i tried dnd myself haha #not quite otgw time yet but its getting close for sure #might try to get my roommate to watch that one when she comes back from scotland ooooo
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  • scotianostra
    28.09.2021 - 5 hours ago

    Happy birthday Scottish television presenter, nutritionist and writer, Gillian McKeith, born on September 28th 1958 in the fair city of Perth.

    Gillian was brought up on a council estate in Perth, her dad was a shipyard worker and mum an office worker. She has said that she was raised eating the junk food she now advises against: “We all know the kind of food I grew up with—a typical Scottish diet. We’d have meat three times a day. I certainly never ate a mango, and had no idea what macrobiotic meant.”

    Gillian is best known as a television presenter and writer. She is the former host of Channel 4’s You Are What You Eat and Granada Television’s Dr Gillian McKeith’s Feel Fab Forever, and as of 2010 presents Eat Yourself Sexy on the W Network in Canada.

    She is the author of several books about nutrition.

    As well as her health shows Gillian has appeared in reality shows, I’m a Celebrity…Get Me Out of Here! and Celebrity Big Brother as well as, The X Factor: Battle of the Stars, singing The Shoop Shoop Song.

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