#self improvement Tumblr posts

  • To all writers/artists out there

    You don’t suck. Practice makes perfect. With work and time, you’ll get as far as you want. And if you can’t believe in yourself right now, I’ll believe in you. 💙

    View Full
  • History of the shadow: 

    Everybody has a shadow self, it’s not possible to be shadow-less. Whether it’s your primitive self or aspects that you reject. From the time that we develop a sense of the world we begin to sort out what we think we need to reject within the world and within ourselves. The more things that we reject and the longer we reject them, the bigger and deeper the shadow grows and plants itself. Once we examine our shadow self, we begin to break down the walls of things we previously saw as taboo and reject worthy and start to nurture those things as dark aspects that must exist in order to have light (law of polarity: one extreme cannot exist without the opposite extreme). The purpose of shadow work is to break down those walls to be able to see the darkness with more compassion. This allows us to acknowledge the things we suppress within ourselves, from there we can sort out what darkness could be used for good (anger = passion = what are you passionate about? = how can you use this for good?) and what darkness we need to heal and move on from. 

    What the shadow is: 

    The shadow aspect of ourselves are the parts we don’t want to admit to having. This can include anything we reject within ourselves. We might reject these aspects due to learned behaviors or beliefs, things we were told aren’t okay to do or be, or things we personally have told ourselves aren’t okay to do. For example: many people hold the belief that crying over simple things isn’t okay and it’s something that only children should do, therefore the adult avoids doing it. Not only does this damage and suppress the inner child we all have within us, it also allows our shadow to grow larger and more prominent the more we repress our natural emotions. Not every aspect of the shadow is a negative one - within the behaviors we see as dark or negative, we are able to find our personal power; we can find our fighter side through our anger and so on. 

    Examples of the shadow self: Any emotion or attribute you don’t want to admit you have (laziness, rage, cruelty, manipulativeness, sadness, but also, social beliefs, likes and dislikes, what makes you who you are)… anything that you hold inside of yourself that you don’t want to admit to having. For me personally - I couldn’t admit I was a lazy, indecisive, eccentric, grudge holding bisexual witch for the longest time until I began exploring my shadow side. I used to get upset when people would call me those things and I used to suppress those sides of myself. When I began exploring my shadow self, I realized that all of those things are a part of me, and I was able to explore which of those things will serve me well, how they can do good for me and how I can heal them or express them in a healthy way and use them to my benefit. 

    How the shadow appears: 

    Just like with real shadows; we stand in the light and if we look back we can see a dark shape with the same form as our bodies - sometimes these shadows are large and sometimes they can be small. Although this is a metaphor, our shadow self is basically a mirror image of ourselves and the dark and rejected aspects of our mind - these parts aren’t always obvious or prominent, they mostly appear subconsciously and through subconscious behaviors that we don’t always recognize. For example: You are having a conversation with a friend and they mention a belief that you do not agree with. Instead of explaining your belief in a calm and respectful way while trying to understand where they are coming from,, you immediately get angry at what they said, but you suppress your anger and change the topic or you have an outburst of anger. This is your shadow self coming up, this can happen with any and every emotion and topic imaginable. One way to recognize your shadow self in this situation is to ask yourself, “what topic set me off? Why would that topic upset me? What in my DNA or in my past could make me be upset towards that opinion? What was my reaction? Why did I react that way? How could I use that reaction in a positive way?” The purpose of shadow work is not to get rid of your negative emotions, but to recognize them and use them in a positive or healthier way. The longer you allow your natural emotions to be suppressed or expressed in an unhealthy way, the bigger and more prominent your shadow grows. So, in short, the shadow appears through subconscious and repressed behaviors, thoughts and beliefs.

    Explained as psychology: 

    The shadow self is actually a term created by psychologist Carl Jung. Although the definition in psychology is a little different - Jung explained the shadow as the uncivilized//primitive sides of ourselves (if we took society away, how our primitive ancestors lived and how we hold those attributes in society today). Jung’s theory was that in order to live a fully integrated human life within society, we need to understand both the primitive and modern aspects of ourselves and how these attributes appear in the collective society. He spoke of the collective shadow; how people unite their shadows within society. Some aspects are based on ethnicity for this reason; throughout history our ancestors have left us hypothetical notes on our DNA telling us what we need and don’t need, that we need to fear and not fear certain things. For example: a person of Irish descent may have the ancestral shadow need to eat as much as they can or to not waste food with the purpose being that their ancestors during the food crisis’ in Ireland left those hypothetical notes in their DNA to warn their descendants of the need to conserve food. These appear in our shadows because even though the current descendent of that ancestry may have a stable food supply, they might still harbor that ancestry-based fear and see it as irrational, when it’s really just a note from their ancestors in their shadow.

    That is one example of ancestral primitive needs - we all have collective primitive needs regardless of descent; food, water and security. Jung’s theory was that people unite all of these shadow aspects into their modern societies, and that it becomes dangerous when we project these primitive shadows into modern societies. This is all up for theorization, but I personally see it as a positive and negative thing at the same time. 

    Negative Examples: (1)  A descendent of colonizers will most likely have racist or entitled ancestral notes in their DNA - leading to the racism and entitlement we continue to see every damn day. (2) The collective primitive need for food and safety existing in a corrupt and unsafe modern world where not everyone has access to food or safety. 

    Positive Examples: (1) Descendants of minorities and activists holding ancestral notes to continue to rise against oppression and fight for fair equality. (2) The collective primitive actions of compassion - during prehistory and for some people living after that period, while there were groups who did not accept outsiders under any circumstances, there were many groups who accepted and cared for those who were struggling or injured regardless of who that person was. This shows today with select individuals choosing to put themselves at risk to help others, taking people in and helping them get on their feet and so on. 

    Conclusion:

    The Shadow Self Is:

    The attitudes, behaviors, emotions and values within ourselves that we reject

    All parts of ourselves that we ignore

    The collective primitive needs we hold in our DNA

    The ancestral primitive needs we hold in our DNA 

    Any attitude or act that we cannot rationally explain (Ex: “I am sad but I have no idea why.”)

    The Purpose of Shadow Work:

    To acknowledge the dark parts of ourselves to be able to use them for good

    To acknowledge those dark parts and approach them with more understanding and compassion, further allowing us to act with our higher consciousness rather than the learned worldly-programming. 

    To recognize what things we need to heal and move on from and what things can be transformed into something good

    To uncover what fears and beliefs belong to us and what things are primitive notes in our DNA

    To begin to act as our higher self, or our true selves. 

    In the craft: to connect with our ancestors and culture. It unlocks a portion of the mind needed to understand the world around us. It becomes easier to connect with your guides and perform spell work. 

    View Full
  • image
    #reading #read in 2020 #read a book #stoicquote #the daily stoic #stoicism#self improvement #note to self #self care
    View Full
  • image

    This is what happens when you become an adult and stop letting your guardians keep the house a complete mess so you take it upon yourself to clean out the linen closet and wash ALL of the sheets and blankets. It may not look like alot but I promise that chair is pretty big and the washer and dryer are both full too. Normalize changing your surroundings to the best of your ability!

    #im not gonna lie #i did not think this through #i am feeling accomplished the further i go tho #i learned to fold a fitted sheet so thats fun #organiser#organization#chores#laundry#marie kondo#self impowerment#self improvement
    View Full
  • [How to Not Care What Others Think] Stop Caring and Seeking Validation 

    View Full
  • image

    A Live Guided Meditation Experience!

    This method is super simple and easy and is changing the live of those all of the world.🌎🕊 Free Online Event Saturday at 3pm EST.

    also 1 on 1 session available too!

    Please RSVP and visit our web:)

    marylandmeditation.org

    301-770-7778

    View Full
  • Am I Sherlock, or is the trauma poking through my habit of dramatising life?


    I hate having to wake up. It’s the worst part of my day, even though I am a morning person. I know it doesn’t make sense, but that’s just how I am.

    I love being asleep, i.e not having to be awake and ergo, exist. But unfortunately for me, I am most productive in the morning(I consider this to be anytime in the am) , so I have to wake up and do stuff.

    And I HATE doing stuff I’m forced to do because of the superficial expectations of society.

    So, back to me being Sherlock and having crazy anxiety I will probably never tell my parents about.

    I can tell my friends lie to me. Don’t worry, it’s nothing dramatic, it’s just- everyday I make an effort to ask them “how are you doing today? How do you feel?” And tell them that I love them. I try to do this every single day.

    Some days, when they answer in affirmatives, I don’t believe them. I don’t know whether it’s because I am picking up on clues (that may not even be there and might be a result of me overthinking every fucking thing ever) or because I know they haven’t been okay, and am aware of something that might be bothering them. I don’t like those days, because for some reason, no matter how hard I try- they feel unable to talk to me.

    And it breaks my heart because I love them so so so freaking much and hate the thought of them hurting.

    I know these things are difficult to talk about, no matter how close you are to someone, and some people prefer to keep it in. I just hope the people I love, know that I love them, and that I am here for them whenever they need me, for whatever it may be.

    And I hope you know that too, stranger reading this. I don’t know anything about you, but- I love you. I like that you exist, I want you to keep existing, I am here for you if you need to rant to me about anything, to listen, to hold, to advise if that’s what you want.

    I love you, and I will never be the only one to do so.

    View Full
  • 🌸🌸🌸

    did you remember to…

    1. Drink some water
    2. Take a deep breath
    3. Think a kind thought about yourself

    do these now! then go on about your day and have a good one ✨

    #self care#self improvement #self care reminder #feyspeaks #you are amazing #you are loved #you are worthy #youre worth it #you are not alone #be kind#pokeprincess
    View Full
  • 🌿 Reasons to stay alive:

    1) Discovering yourself (you are worth discovering)

    2) How silly people get when they’re sleepy

    3) Sitting in hammocks

    4) long hugs

    5) Going to the zoo

    6) Carving pumpkins

    7) cute baby animals

    8) kissing in the rain

    9) singing

    10) The smell of baking cookies

    11) picnics

    12) Warm blankets when it’s cold

    13) you are so loved

    14) octobers

    15) staying up all night and sleeping in

    16) water balloon fights

    17) making babies smile

    18) movie marathons

    19) foreign cities, languages, people & food

    20) Those “this never leaves the room” moments

    21) rainbows

    22) you will be missed

    23) Drinking hot chocolate/coffee/ & tea

    24) Binge-watching a series

    25) Slow dances

    26) you are never alone

    27) meeting new people

    28) traveling

    29) Watermelon in the summer

    30) sunsets

    31) naps

    32) road trips

    33) Finally understanding what something means

    34) late-night phone calls

    35) Listening to rainstorms

    36) Cuddling

    37) climbing trees

    38) Going for walks

    39) Doing crazy things with your best friends

    40) getting married someday

    41) Kind comments from others

    42) tears of joy

    43) drawing

    44) cartoons

    45) laughing really hard

    46) making other people happy

    47) sleeping in

    48) jumping in puddles

    49) Flowers

    50) you are needed

    51) fireflies

    52) undiscovered forests

    53) art

    54) Really good books

    55) finding love of all kinds

    56) jumping really high on a trampoline

    57) hugging

    58) full moons

    59) crunchy leaves

    60) Seeing yourself recover

    61) concerts

    62) stargazing

    63) kissing

    64) secrets and promises

    65) Autumn leaves

    66) knowing all of the lyrics to a song

    67) orgasms

    68) the smell after rain

    69) Getting handwritten notes in the mail

    70) Halloween

    71) Clean sheets

    72) The first snow of the winter

    73) petting puppies

    74) City lights

    75) late night walks

    76) Building forts

    77) Smiling in the middle of a kiss

    78) people care about you

    79) you are important

    80) bonfires

    81) thunderstorms

    82) having kids if you want

    83) sunrises

    84) When a baby holds onto one of your fingers with it’s whole hand

    85) going to comic con

    86) kind strangers

    87) bowties

    88) treehouses

    89) music

    90) slow dance parties in your room

    91) new video games

    92) long drives

    93) being awake when everyone else is asleep

    94) eye sex

    95) smiling at strangers

    96) onesies

    97) you could save someone’s life

    98) The sky and it’s beautiful colors

    99) walks on the beach

    100) sitting on rooftops

    101) paint fights

    102) There will be a time you’ll see that you’re glad you didn’t do it

    103) pillow fights

    104) lying on grass and watching clouds

    105) you matter

    106) watching fireworks

    107) graduating

    108) snow cones

    109) bay windows

    110) silence that isn’t awkward

    111) messy hair

    112) Your pets wouldn’t understand why you’re not around

    113) warm showers

    114) making smores

    115) when you start smiling and can’t stop

    #inspiration#pokeprincess #reasons to stay alive #youre worth it #things i love #you are not alone #you are worthy #you are loved #you are amazing #you are my sunshine #self care reminder #self care#self improvement#thank you#feyspeaks
    View Full
  • image

    You wanted me on my knees.

    (Although flirty in nature, this is not an invitation. I have no interest in sexting with you or seeing your genitalia. Also DON’T call me sexy, it makes my skin crawl. This is simply a woman sharing the love of her body with the world.)

    View Full
  • View Full
  • Learning German to keep the mind healthy, and working out to try and improve on this “dad-bod”. So, what are you doing during lock-down?

    View Full
  • There are many things I need to work on, and I realise now that I’m self-sabotaging my journey the most of the time and this is a path I need to change. A path that belongs to my old self, someone I’m gradually leaving day by day. Today is important to start a new routine, everyday is a new challenge and opportunity to love myself and prove to my inner self, to my inner child, that she is worth it. She deserves happiness and joy, she deserves my attention and care. She deserves a plan that will make her a better self. I’m the only one in power to do this. To deeply love myself and to love my growth.

    image
    View Full