Samantha’s birthday party is nearly ruined when Eddie Ryland plays a mean trick. Then Agnes and Agatha, Cornelia’s ten-year-old twin sisters, save the day with an invitation to visit New York City. Samantha loves the twins’ carefree attitude and can’t wait to go–especially since the trip will include a stop at a fancy ice cream parlor. But when the girls carelessly break some rules, they suddenly find themselves racing dangerously through the big city–and the path they take leads to surprising discoveries.
This won’t reach the people who really need to hear it, but Many women like myself have supported trans rights from the first time we learned of the issues. We didn’t suddenly turn into transphobic bigots because some terfs brainwashed us. I used to proudly proclaim “no terfs”! Until I started to realize with a sickening certainty that there are aspects of trans rhetoric that Hates women. Hates it when we talk about female issues. Hates it when we rely on one another in solidarity. Hates it when we name our oppression as females and males as our oppressors.
I’m not going to lie, the crusade to make terf a thing was hugely successful. And now it’s used to shut women up for any transgression online and offline. They could be outright transphobic (which is not an excuse to be sexist) or they could be like me, trans supporter and feminist recognizing the rotten smell of sexism in too many trans activist demands. Our feminist spaces have been eroded. A rape crisis shelter was shut down because it recognized that females fleeing male violence must be allowed space away from any and all males.
But male privilege, it runs deep. Too many of you think you can identify out of male socialization. Too many of you think women are the true evil, not the men who actually kill most trans women of color. White trans people are not nearly in as much danger, and as a whole trans women are not in as much danger of being raped and murdered the way girls and women have been for centuries. Myths about death statistics have skewed perspectives on what trans oppression actually looks like.
I sympathize with the trans plight, but don’t piss on me and call it rain. You want to know why so many women feel compelled to speak out against TRAs? It’s not because you face the worst oppression ever, it’s because you perpetuate sexism and claim being trans means you can’t possibly be sexist. It’s fucked up, and many women are starting to see through the bullshit. Especially since that bullsht smells exactly like MRA bullshit. I mean, demanding lesbians have sex with trans women to make them feel valid is the MRA equivalent of thinking women owe men sex because they were taught from birth women are their playthings.
I have literally no problem with trans existence. I have every problem with female oppression. If it wasn’t for the fact that society is buying this shit and creating real and devastating consequences for women, I wouldn’t be doing this. This blog wouldn’t exist.
I have been personally attacked for not following the groupthink, something I have never and would never do to anyone online. This is real for me, not some online game. No one should be “called out” and attacked for reblogging people you don’t like. Why can’t any of you see how epically entitled that is and practically fascist?
Do I think feminism is perfect? No. Does it have its own issues? Of course. But arguments within feminism doesn’t put rapists in women prisons. It doesn’t remove female bathrooms to create unisex ones and leave men’s ones alone. It doesn’t systematically try to destroy every female space to validate the feelings of a few. For the most part it aims to bring equality to women of all backgrounds and challenge the privilege of men, not make itself feel valid by attacking another minority. Trans rights activists have a laser focus on hating women and some of you think it’s transphobic to respond? Fuck that. And despite my fury at what TRA’s have done to feminism, I don’t hold it against all trans people.
I wish I could look away and not have to focus on trans activism. You all did this when you couldn’t let women be. Now more and more women are seeing through this bullsht and those of you that hate terfs so much, you truly only have yourselves to blame.
In 7 weeks, 5 women were sent home and the 2 men who were sent home were minorities. There are only two more minorities left before we get to the white women…
If you do the math, there were more minorities on the show than there were white, hetero, neurotypical men, and none of the men have gone home. Only one of the men was nominated for eviction. The other remaining houseguests are white women who are very content with falling in line with the white men. It’s a little America crammed into one house.
No More Than Your Shoulders Can Handle [Toronto 2019] challenge systemic oppression against Black women and trans folks. Her work explores and connects past traumas of slavery to ongoing colonial violence and Black mental health.
By 1970, surely the US Military couldn’t ignore the ongoing Vietnam War and dramatic social changes of the 1960s - or could it? While the Equal Rights Amendment was being debated in Congress, the military issued new films that stressed “there is no conflict between functioning efficiently as a military servicewoman and in maintaining one’s feminine identity at all times.”
In thePleasure of Your Company, Women’s Army Corps soldiers chat while they do embroidery, file their nails, iron their uniforms, and shine their shoes. They trade horror stories not about their dates, but about their embarrassing dating faux pas. Then, they get etiquette tips and a “redo” - a chance to do things the right way. Don’t worry, the women are upbeat and positive. Learning military etiquette is fun! One exclaims:“I really enjoy being a girl. It’s so great!”
The male narrator stresses the importance of etiquette:
“Good manners, social grace and courtesy are the mark of a successful servicewoman.”
“Knowing what to do in specific situations is a matter of custom, instinct, education and good taste.”
“We expect the girls to show good taste in everything they wear.”
At this crucial moment, Captain York (above right) says that miniskirts and other new styles are just fine for “off-duty” wear. The young woman tells her friends later: “Oh wow! You could have knocked me over with a pin!” She adds that the Captain is “an absolutely groovy person, and really a swinger!”
Who opens the door?
The woman only referred to as “Sweetie” shares the embarrassing moment (pictured below) when she and her boyfriend reach for the door at the same time! Thankfully, she learns that off-duty she can be a lady!
“It was so confusing… I can’t remember when I’m supposed to open a door, and when I’m not. But I get kind of confused because after 1700 hours this little pumpkin changes and becomes the lady and they stand for me, and they open doors for me.”
“I keep forgetting, he’s not an officer so I let him open the door, right?”
Don’t stress at dinner! Have your date order for you!
Sandy speaks candidly about her experience at a nice restaurant.She doesn’t know how to order -she and her date speak at the same time and confuse the waiter! Even worse, she doesn’t know what piece of silverware to use! Thankfully, “Sweetie” sets her straight and she sails through the redo.
Sandy’s mortified - what fork should she use? The outside one? The inside one?
Office party planning panic!
Fast forward, if you wish, to the heated conflict over the welcome reception for the new Sergeant Major. Should it be a sit-down dinner? A nice breakfast coffee? A dinner buffet? No spoiler alerts here!
Action scene: heated fight over reception planning.
How to achieve the perfect party flow!
“Sweetie” feels invalidated when she tells her boyfriend Tom about the party planning stress. He asks judgmentally: “What’s the big deal? So you have to set up a reception… What’s so tough about that?”
“Sweetie” details the extensive work needed to pull off such an event - they had to set up a committee to select the food and beverages, and then she needed to organize the receiving line. And yet more responsibility - she had to choose whom to invite, and then send out the invitations!
Tom apologizes: “Hey, they does take a lot of doing, doesn’t it? I’m sorry Sweetie, I didn’t mean to put you down.” “Sweetie” states: “People think it’s easy, but it’s not.”
As the narrator underscores in a low voiceover: “There’s more to it than just having a good time… Getting people to mix and mingle is a very important part of any party.”
“Sweetie” realizes in horror: “Oh no! No one’s talking to the guest of honor!”
Remember: “Good appearance, social graces, personal development of this kind pays off in career advancement, social acceptance and personal fulfillment. A pretty good deal.”
“Women have been taught to be dominated and controlled, and that idea must have passed down through generations, wether by genes or through education. That’s where these stereotypes of women being indecisive come from; many of their decisions have been ridiculed, and retaken by others that should not be entitled to do such things. And yet when women try to regain their ability to make their choices- by being given actual options to choose from- they get, once again, ridiculed. It seems to me as if women having control and power over their own beings is seen as insulting towards men currently in power. They see independent women as threats.
Unfortunately, not many women stand by feminism. Having been taught as such, they continue to foolishly submit to people that will never ever even be worthy of being dominant. Nobody should ever be seen as “dominant” in my opinion. A leader and a boss are two different things.
Then here the horrors of heteronormative flirting come in; what a lot of men see as women being “complicated” is, truthfully, the strange “need” women have for certain things- actions- to be more… forced. Again, this disgusts me. Often it is a playful thing, a seemingly harmless thing, but it still can twist and confuse consent with flirtatious games.
This has come to the point where consent is seen as a pitiful thing, unless we are talking of the extremes (e.g. sexual intercourse, healthcare decisions, etc.) and yet even then some men- the ones that still have “traditional”, sexist views- ignore the need for consent no matter the situation.
Of course, this does not apply to only men, but elderly men in particular see their ignoring of women’s consent- or rather, the lack of it- as a right, and the way society does treat it as a right only further helps strengthen such a horrid idea in their minds. The difference between women and men in these scenarios is that a woman must have a lot of anger, pain or issues to go to such lengths, while a man needs only to have been taught misogyny to act as such, as the power misogyny gives to a man can be corrupting.”
A few paragraphs inspired by a page I wrote in my “quotebook” (as I like to call it)
I got a message on another side blog that I reblogged terfs. I don’t respond to them, I just delete them. However this one mentioned some kind of app that highlighted terfs in red so I wouldn’t accidentally reblog a terf, and honestly that’s just horrifying. How much do you have to hate women to go out of your way to mark them online so people don’t dare interact and make the mistake of seeing reasoned arguments.
I think we really do need to talk about kawaii culture! And the cultural appropriation of it is to exploit it to appeal to men in a sexual way when it was started by women and girls with body dysmorphia and sexual trauma rebelling against the obligations to be attractive to men and how no one cares and say it’s woke to support people of color that exploit our communities