// TRIGGER WARNINGS - mentions of suicide attempt and hospitalization
I’m often told that I need to be independent and get my own job and money. Of course I don’t want to financially depend on my parents forever. Of course I want my own house and my own loving, healthy family. I do want to be free from my parents.
But the problem is that I’ve been expected to be independent since I was just a child. More emotionally speaking, but it’s still true. My family gave me no emotional support at all through my traumatic experiences. I saw my parents violently separating right in front of my eyes, but nobody thought to comfort the four-year-old little girl who couldn’t understand why her parents were yelling and almost hitting one another.
No one was really there for the short-tempered teenage girl who was bullied and isolated by her peers, and practically ignored by her teachers through the entirety of Middle School. Who was accused of being the “unreasonable” one for being angry.
No one was there when her parents got together again and started fighting and shaking the walls again. No one was there when her grandma, the only person who unconditionally loved her, suddenly died before the girl could thank her for it.
No one was there when this girl began to want to kill herself when she was only fifteen. No one is even there when she’s hospitalized, and living in a daily hangover and yet still needing to live to finish her chores.
When she needs anything, she’s mocked, she’s humiliated, she’s neglected.
What has this little girl done to deserve to hurt so much?
