full swing emotional torment
(LISTEN the idea looks great in my head but by GOD did it come out bad)
full swing emotional torment
(LISTEN the idea looks great in my head but by GOD did it come out bad)
Fandom: Sk8 the Infinity
Characters: Shindo Ainosuke (Adam), Kikuchi Tadashi (Snake), Shindo Ainosuke’s Aunts
Warnings: Emotional Manipulation, References to Abuse, Yandere Tadashi, Graphic Violence, Non-Sexual Bondage, Murder/Minor Character Death, Blood, Gore, Crying, Vomiting, etc. Tread carefully!
Word Count: 2.2k
Summary: (AU - Canon Divergence) Tadashi is tired of Ainosuke's aunts and their manipulations, so he decides to take matters into his own hands, whether Ainosuke wants it or not. [TadaAi Week 2021 | Day 2: Separation/Ties]
“Ainosuke-sama. Your presence is requested in the drawing room.”
Tadashi cuts off the call before Ainosuke can reply, and he’s left staring at his phone in bewilderment. The only people who would call him to the drawing room would be his aunts, but it’s the middle of the night. And usually, Tadashi would come to fetch him in person.
Still, he can’t resist the habits that have been ingrained in him since he was four: when his aunts call for him, he attends, regardless of what he’s doing. Whether he was just sitting in the garden, in a lesson with his tutors, or even at one of his equestrian classes, when the call came, someone would come to fetch him and bring him inside. The only place where he could be certain that he wouldn’t be interrupted was when he was in school.
Thus, confused, he nevertheless begins the walk down to the drawing room, frowning as he draws closer. There are small noises that he can’t identify: muffled, high-pitched voices that he can’t understand, a rustle and the sound of something tearing. And when he steps into the room, it feels as if the axis of the world has tilted, and he’s stepped into a dream… or a nightmare.
His aunts are seated around the table as they usually are, and when he enters the room, three pairs of eyes turn to look at him, just like always. But they aren’t eyes filled with their usual confidence and self-assurance. They’re wide, desperate, and terrified. Each of them is tied to her chair with coarse rope, their mouths stuffed with cloth, and Hanako and Masako are covered in plastic sheeting that wraps around their necks like a barber’s cape. More rustling draws his attention to Kanako, and Tadashi behind her, securing a third sheet around the woman with the harsh rip of more tape. And then his assistant straightens up, tugging at the lapels of his jacket before looking at Ainosuke. And he doesn’t recognize those eyes, either: they’re as flat as always, but they’re also cold. So cold that it makes Ainosuke shiver and take an involuntary step back.
His voice sounds strange to his ears, thin and distant.
“Tadashi? What are you doing?”
Hanako is trying to say something through her gag, frantic words that break apart into unintelligible noise. Masako is struggling against her bonds, the rope twisting the silk of her nightgown and leaving red welts around her wrists. Kanako is lunging forward, dragging her chair forward in a soft scrape of wood on wood, but Ainosuke can’t look away from the man who’s brought them all here. So he sees when Tadashi reaches into his jacket pocket and pulls out something that shines dark and metallic in the moonlight coming through the window, pressing it to Kanako’s head. And the woman freezes instantly, her pleading eyes staring at Ainosuke, begging for him to stop whatever is happening.
Bending over, Tadashi pulls out the cloth from her mouth, dropping the soaked fabric into her lap, where it squelches against the plastic.
“Ainosuke!” she gasps, her voice high with terror. “Do something! Call the police! Call--”
She’s cut off by a cold voice that none of them recognize, her head snapping sideways when the gun is slammed against her head. A gun. Where the hell had Tadashi gotten a gun? Kanako whimpers as blood courses down her face while the barrel is shoved against the back of her head again.
“The only words I want to hear out of your mouth are apologies to Ainosuke-sama. Anything else, and I’ll pull the trigger. If you don’t do a good job, I’ll pull the trigger.”
There’s a beat of silence, and then Kanako is babbling, tears drawing tracks through the blood.
“Ainosuke, you know we love you, right? We just--”
And she flinches at the sound of a small click, the cocking of the gun.
“NO! Nonono, I'm sorry. I'll do it. I'm sorry, Ainosuke. We hurt you, and I regret it. I didn't mean to. I just wanted to raise you into an outstanding man. And you've done us so proud, Ainosuke. We just tried our best to--"
With a bang, Kanako suddenly slumps forward, and her sisters' screams can be heard through their gags while they jerk against the ropes and Ainosuke stares, wide-eyed with shock. Kanako doesn't move while blood drips from her head, pattering against the plastic like rain. She just sits, silent and still, and he just watches with a sick sense of horror.
But then Tadashi is moving, crossing the room, and he can't help but follow the other man's silent progress. The moonlight illuminates a splash of something on his face, wet and dark, but Tadashi hasn't even bothered to try to wipe it away. And then he stops behind Masako, and Ainosuke's legs can no longer support his weight. He crumbles to his knees, his throat working frantically to force words out.
"Tadashi... stop. Please," he begs, watching his youngest aunt cringe and shiver. "What do you want? We'll give it to you, anything. We won't tell the police what happened. I promise. It's not too late. You can still stop. Just stop. Please. Don't... don't kill her. Don't kill them."
Tadashi doesn't even seem to hear him as he bends over to pull the gag out of Masako's mouth. The woman is sobbing helplessly, her face tear-stained and her breath coming in short, choking gasps. Even the gun pressed to her head can't suppress her panic, and neither can Tadashi's chilling voice.
But there's no sound in the room except for Masako's crying and Hanako's muffled shouts, and then Tadashi sighs with apparent impatience. A gloved hand wraps around Masako's slender throat, and Ainosuke just stares as the fingers tighten, digging into soft flesh. And the cries are suddenly cut off, and Masako struggles in Tadashi’s grip, her mouth opening and closing soundlessly until he finally lets go. And then she slumps forward, coughing, only for Tadashi’s hand to fist in her hair and drag her head up, forcing her to look over at Ainosuke.
“Your turn,” he repeats.
“Ainosuke. Ainosuke, dear. I’m sorry. I’m so, so sorry. We were wrong. What we did was wrong.” Masako’s voice is hoarse and shaky, and every word seems to cause her pain, but she forces them out anyways, tears still falling down her face. “We hurt you badly. We ruined your childhood. We were selfish, thinking of ourselves and the family. Not thinking about you.”
“No. No, that’s not true, auntie. You raised me. All of you,” Ainosuke protests, his mouth dry. And it’s true: without them, he couldn’t have become the man he was today. They’d loved him, and they’d taught him everything he knew, everything he needed to succeed. It was true that their love sometimes hurt, but he’d always known that it was only because they cared.
“Keep going,” says the voice of the executioner, and both of them flinch.
“Kikuchi-kun is right, Ainosuke. We should apologize. We need to apologize. It was all our fault. Everything. All of it. Please, Kikuchi-kun. Let us go. We won’t say anything. We’ll make it up however we can. Let us start over, please. I never wanted to do it; it was always them. Hanako and--”
Ainosuke sees her eyes widen and then try to push their way out of their sockets, and a mark appears on her forehead with something dark trickling out of it before Tadashi lets go and Masako’s head falls forward limply. He hadn’t even heard the shot, and a sour taste grows in the back of his throat before he collapses forward himself, his hands resting on the floor as he vomits onto the ground, belatedly realizing that it’s been covered with more of the plastic sheeting. His stomach heaves, bringing up more of his dinner in a slimy mess, and he realizes that he’s crying too, hot tears falling over his cheeks.
What’s going on? Why is Tadashi doing this? What have any of them done to deserve this... this senseless, ruthless execution? He chokes and cries until there’s nothing left for him to bring up, and his throat is raw and disgusting when he finally looks up, knowing what he’ll see. Tadashi’s standing right behind Hanako, his expression impassive as he looks down on his master with his hand resting on the back of the couch.
“Tadashi,” Ainosuke chokes out past the taste of acid on his tongue. “Please...”
Once again, Tadashi removes the gag from the woman’s mouth before nudging her with his gun. Hanako’s always been the strongest of her sisters, the matriarch of the family, and it breaks Ainosuke’s heart to see her shaking with sobs, looking between the corpses surrounding them.
“Kanako... Masako...” she whispers, her voice filled with so much grief that it seems likely to drive Ainosuke mad. But then her eyes harden, and she tilts her head back to spit at Tadashi, her saliva striking him on the cheek and mingling with Kanako’s blood.
“You won’t intimidate me, servant. What do you know about nobility, when you sneak into our rooms in the middle of the night and force us here at gunpoint? When you coerce us to lie with our lives in the balance? Go ahead and kill me! Show Ainosuke that we were right to separate him from your foul influence! Watch, Ainosuke! This is how the lower-class creatures live!”
“Tadashi! Auntie!” Ainosuke cries out, even as Tadashi says, “As you wish.”
And a third shot rings out, echoing in his ears.
He doesn’t know how long he’s knelt there with vomit soaking into his pants, staring at the ground because it’s better than looking up. He doesn’t even realize that Tadashi has moved until the older man is kneeling right next to him, and then Ainosuke is scrambling away in a wild panic until he’s backed himself against the wall. He still doesn’t understand, but it’s his turn next: it must be. Tadashi’s too smart to leave any witnesses to the crime, and he’s clearly thought it through to ensure that any mess is easy to clean up and hide. He’s probably got a perfect plan for disposing of the bodies, too, in a way that they won’t ever be found. Maybe even for Tadashi to disappear as well.
There’s something dark lying on the ground between them, and Ainosuke’s watery eyes are drawn toward it, and he flinches when he recognizes the gun with Tadashi’s hand lying on top of it. But the hand retreats, leaving the weapon behind, and he looks up at the man he thought he knew but he clearly didn’t, sitting in seiza in front of him.
“If you wish to take revenge, Ainosuke-sama, I won’t stop you.”
The coldness is gone, but Tadashi’s voice is as flat and colorless as it’s always been since their separation. Glassy-eyed with shock, Ainosuke stares at him, afraid of a trick. But as the silence stretches between them and Tadashi doesn't move a muscle, Ainosuke lunges forward to grab the gun and whips back just as quickly, the weapon heavy in his hands as he points it at the other man. And Tadashi just sits there.
His finger creaks on the trigger as he remembers his aunts, the women who gave up their own futures to ensure that he would be successful at everything he put his mind to. Who taught him how to navigate the messy world of human relations and politics. Who ensured that he learned how to prioritize, that he understood his role as the scion of a family of status. Who loved him.
And Tadashi had killed them all. Heartlessly, with the same efficiency with which he handled everything else.
"Why?" he asks, his hands shaking. "Why, Tadashi?"
"Because you deserve to be free."
What does that even mean? He wants to pull the trigger, to end Tadashi's life just as easily as Tadashi ended his aunts', but no matter how much he tries, it's as if he's frozen. But Tadashi just waits patiently, looking up at him calmly, until the gun finally falls from his hands, thunking on the floor.
And then Tadashi is sweeping him into his arms, hugging him, and Ainosuke's tears flow freely as he hugs his family's murderer back, desperate for warmth. It's wrong. It's so wrong that he can't even find the words to describe just how fucked up this whole situation is. But he can't kill Tadashi, even after all this.
"It's okay, Ainosuke-sama. It's because you're kind. But you're safe, I promise. I'll be here for you. I'll teach you."
The words are soft and reassuring, words that don't match what Tadashi has just done, but Ainosuke still clings to him helplessly, hating himself and hating Tadashi. Then, Tadashi stands up, hefting Ainosuke in his arms before starting to carry him back to his room.
He helps Ainosuke change out of his soiled clothes and gets him a glass of water, helping him to drink before tucking him into bed, as if his master is a child again. Then he leaves, murmuring something about cleaning up the mess. And Ainosuke lies in bed, staring at the ceiling and praying that it was all a nightmare, that it'll go away when he wakes up in the morning.
I spent all day making this 😌
Just to clarify... I'm not necessarily against Langa x Reki or Joe X Cherry, I just don't ship them myself. HowEVER, Adam X therapy... Now thAts food for thought
I can't get over Adam calling skating a "ritual of love" and the way he performs it like... mating beetle?? What?
Adam: Can I get a light roast?
Joe: Well, you're kinda ugly
Some Politician idk: How would you describe yourself?
Adam: Verbally, but I've also prepared an interpretive dance number
Day 1 "Memories"
Rating: General Audiences Fandom: SK8 the Infinity Relationship: Ainosuke/Tadashi Words: 1375 Day 1 of TadaAi Week 2021: memories & first times
After Ainosuke witnesses Tadashi crying for the first time, he decides to focus on their first kiss instead.
Tadashi wasn’t one to show any emotions unless explicitly told to do so. He always wore his lips in a straight line or parted to let out moans when alone with Ainosuke. One could yell at him, insult him, or physically harm him without getting much of a response.
Of course, that didn’t mean he was completely emotionless. He did have them.
When the aunts got up to leave and the office door shut, Tadashi broke down. It’d startled Ainosuke, as he hadn’t been prepared to console a crying person… ever. It was typically the other way around. Also, this was someone he truly cared about, so he couldn’t fake his way out of this one.
[complete work on ao3]
There’s some drama going around on sk8twt involving an artist who made art of Adam and Tadashi and a bunch of people attacked them for it and bullied them into deleting their account. I just wanted to say that this shit is unacceptable and toxic as hell. I avoid Twitter for these reasons but I still end up seeing it and feeling disgusted. The sk8 fandom was such a happy place for me and it still is but I know it is an anime fandom and those can always get messy.
If you don’t like a character(s)/ship and you see someone making art of it/them theres this button that lets you unfollow and even block someone so you don’t have to see the content anymore. Let people like what they want and just move on. There’s no reason to attack anyone for something they like just because you don’t like it. Adam isn’t my favorite but I can appreciate there is some amazing art of him and if I do see some art or content I don’t like of him I just scroll past it’s that easy. Let’s please be respectful to other people and keep sk8twt and the fandom as a whole a safe and welcoming environment
(Yep, I'm still in hell with Adam. 💕)
Fandom: Sk8 the Infinity
Characters: Shindo Ainosuke (Adam), Kikuchi Tadashi (Snake)
Warnings: Light angst, kissing
Word Count: <1k
Summary: Ainosuke reflects on his past with Tadashi and some of the "firsts" that he received from his first true friend. [TadaAi Week 2021 | Day 1: Memories/Firsts]
It’s been nearly two decades, but the roses in the garden are still the same as they were back then. The moonlight illuminates the dark hedges spotted with blooms in rich scarlet and pale pink, their perfume rising and mingling with the acrid smoke of his cigarette. He’s always found it soothing, the rich damask scent that always seemed to surround him during the best moments of his life.
Like when he learned how to skate. He no longer remembers why he was crying, tucked away in a corner where he thought nobody would find him. And yet, Tadashi did.
He’d seen the other boy around, of course, helping his father in the garden or his mother in the house, but they’d never talked before then. He doesn’t know if his aunts said something to Tadashi or his parents, but they had certainly impressed upon him that he shouldn’t waste his time fraternizing with the servants. That they were below his notice, lesser beings who offered nothing to elevate the family’s status, tolerated only for their skills so that “real people” didn’t need to stoop to menial tasks. So he’d hesitated when Tadashi had offered him his board, worried about his family’s disapproval, if they found out.
But it was the first time someone around his age had ever tried to share something with him.
And he had been feeling so alone.
So he’d accepted, and for the first time in his life, he’d tasted freedom. Nothing compared to the wind in his hair, the board rolling under his feet, the feeling of flying. Quickly, it became the singular allowance in his strictly regimented life, a breath of fresh air between his unending lessons and perpetual reminders that he needed to be perfect: the perfect child, the perfect student, the perfect heir. His family had known--they must have--but they didn’t intervene, and that had made those moments all the more thrilling, being able to be nothing more and nothing less than himself. He didn't have to worry about meeting expectations or about how other people would look at him: he could just have fun.
With his family's tacit approval, he was able to throw himself into his newfound passion, skating alongside his first real friend and sharing more experiences: Tadashi teaching him tricks, giving him cheap sweets and snacks, talking about the sort of things that “normal” kids enjoyed... and yet, there was never anything that he could seem to do in return.
So one evening, before they met up, he walked through the garden, looking for the perfect rose: deep red and perfectly shaped, each of the petals soft and velvety beneath his fingers, untouched by bugs, or weather, or blight. It had been harder to pick than he’d imagined it would be, in part because he’d been afraid of damaging it, and it had also been heavier than he’d expected, a reassuring weight in his palms. But it had been worth it when he’d given it to Tadashi and seen his face light up, accepting the gift as if it were a priceless treasure. And then the older boy had leaned forward to hug him.
There's the stir of movement behind him, and he looks backwards, meeting emerald eyes. Immediately, Tadashi is climbing out of the bed, dragging the covers with him as he walks over, as attentive as always. He lets his lover drape his arms over his shoulders, pulling him back against a well-muscled chest before he stubs his cigarette out on the windowsill and drops it to the floor, where Tadashi will certainly pick it up in the morning.
"Ainosuke-sama. Is everything alright?"
The familiar voice is soft with concern, and Tadashi's skin is warm against his as he allows himself to lean against the older man.
"I'm fine. Just thinking," he tells Tadashi, whose arms tighten around him.
About the years of silence and hurt that had fallen between them. About the guilt, and the anger, and the loneliness. And the pride. He'd known that it hadn't been Tadashi's fault, not really, but that hadn't lessened the sense of betrayal. And so he'd lashed out at the friend who had always been by his side, watching with mounting resentment as Tadashi had simply accepted it. Accepted being a step behind him, his eyes downcast. Refusing to stand up to him, to stand by him.
He doesn't realize that he's tensed up until gentle fingers are rubbing at the base of his neck, and he relaxes under the skilled, familiar touch. And Tadashi speaks as if he can read his mind, words of reassurance that he doesn't realize he wants until they're spoken aloud.
"It's alright, Ainosuke-sama. Everything's alright now."
And it is, isn't it? There isn't much point in lamenting over the time they've lost. What's more important now is taking advantage of the time they have left now that they're finally together. Now that they can talk openly once more. Now that they finally understand each other again. So he tilts his head back as Tadashi bends his own head to meet him in a soft, lingering kiss.
"Thank you," he whispers. For giving him everything good in his life. For staying with him. For waiting for him. For loving him.
Tadashi reaches out for the window, only to pause when a hand lands on his arm.
"Leave it open tonight."
Tadashi hesitates only for a moment--probably considering the security concerns--before nodding. And he allows himself to be led back to the bed, pressing up against the warmth of the dark-haired man's body with strong arms wrapping around his shoulders.
He wants to fall asleep to the smell of roses.
I keep thinking about Ainosuke becoming obsessed telling Tadashi that he's his dog or "you're mine" randomly just to see him smile like that again 💗 and Tadashi nodding to it everytime
(I took a little time today to draw this little headcanon 🥺💗)
why does adam remind me of hisoka
is there anyone named adam who isnt a freak . i just wanna know 🤔
cherry explaining adam's tricks: something about perception
langa, who depth perception is fucked up: yeah that won't be issue
“Not going to text your pet gorilla?”
“If he had any idea where I was right now, he’d come pry these doors open with his bare hands and beat you senseless,” Cherry says flatly. “He’s still pissed about the tournament.”
Ainosuke raises an eyebrow. “You aren’t?”
“Bones heal.” Cherry dodges the question and then goes silent.
Forgot to post this one here too, so here you are: the 'Ainosuke and Kaoru get trapped in an elevator together' ficlet that no one asked for. Lol
The phone rings, buzzing muffled against the comforter, and a jolt of queasy adrenaline shoots through Kaoru when Adam’s icon pops up on the screen. He’s calling. Weeks of being left on read, and now he’s calling.
Kaoru is about to get dumped, isn't he?
Forgot to link this one when I posted it, so here it is now! Teenage loveblossom breakup ficlet 🌹🌸
new drama cd is giving me second hand embarrassment but also reki sounds so SAD in it why did they make him SAD
Hot take of the day: not only was Adam a twilight stan, he was 100% convinced that Bella and Edward had a completely healthy relationship