guess who's sick again? lol me. confused as to how but maybe that cold yeonjun said he had got to me.
request: 'Can I request txt reaction when their girlfriend is shorter'
genre: super fluff, slight mentions of weight, established relationship.
he would love it so much, it would make him feel so nice ??
of course he would tease you once in a while about it but he would definitely love it. he's go from teasing you on minute to wrapping his arms around you and resting his head on yours.
he would smile softly when you ask him to help you reach something. of course after he teases you about not being able to reach it, he gets it for you and kisses the top of your head because you are the most ￼precious thing in his eyes.
sometimes instead of him grabbing it for you he'd pick you up to let you do it instead. he knows you don't want him to pick you up because you're a little worried you might be too heavy but he tells you to never worry about that.
most people are smaller than soobin which is why he knew his partner would most likely be a lot shorter than him.
he will probably always pick you up and sit you on a table, counter, any surface that will let you meet his eyes better to talk.
you have to get used to getting tons of head kisses, literally so many, and he chuckles when you ask him to kiss your lips because he teases you by saying something like "reach them then~"
when you guys play fight he moves things he knows you uses to the top shelf where he knows you can't get to them.
OH IT MAKES HIM FEEL LIKE A KING!!! he's always around people who are taller than him but, like he always says he's actually a pretty tall person. so he loves the feeling he gets around you.
he probably holds things over his head to tease you and get you frustrated. he loves messing with you so this is perfect.
he loves coming behind you and wrapping his arms around your figure and placing his head on yours. it's one of his favorite ways to show you affection.
he'll probably reach over and ruffle your hair, even if you styled it well he'd love to get you ￼aggravated by messing your hair up.
he honestly doesnt have a preference￼! does he feel a little more useful if he's taller than you? yeah! he likes to help you 100% of the time with things.
on a usual ￼occasion he's reaching over you f he needs something, which he says it's practical because both if you can be working at different things at once without being in eachother's way.
he'll often place things on your head for you to balance yknow as a #joke lol. he says you're the perfect height for a little stool to put things on, so yknow taehyun teases too
but over all he thinks is extremely cute how he can just pick you up so easily and walk around with you regardless.
he's also one that doesn't care about height. he'd carry you around regardless of height. he doesn't care but, yes huening WILL pick you up and act like he'd drop you but wont.
he rests his arm on your head to be annoying, and of course he gives you a toothy grin when you look at him ready to fight.
expect him to ask you stupid questions like "lol how's the weather down there? it's kinda cold here"
but this sweet boy wouldn't love you any less, he'd kiss the top of your head and would probably find it so normal to just back hug you and rest his head on yours. he loves it a lot.
Warnings: Brief mentions of fear of thunderstorms.
The first time you had asked your roommate to hold you was approximately two months ago; the beginning of monsoon. Huening Kai had been busy crunching on some chips, binge watching another kdrama and spilling all the crumbs on the couch.
When you had shown up in front of him (he had assumed it was to scold him for spilling crumbs) , your hands trembling and eyes glassy as it thundered outside, he swore he felt something break inside. "Can you hold me, please?", you had asked with so much desperation that Kai just couldn't say no.
He had wasted no time in pulling you into his warm embrace, whispering reassuring words into your ears.
"Hey bud, it's going to be over soon, k?" He had gently whispered, hands rubbing awkwardly at your back.
You had thought that it would just be for that one night, really, but all this cuddling had carried on even after the storm had receded. Infact, it had become a daily routine at this point.
You'd just walk into his room, with a pillow tucked under your arms, he'd spare you a small glance and open his arms for you, a wide smile on his face. Whenever Kai had a bad day, he would just stand in front of you with the cutest pout, mumbling "Can we cuddle, platonically?"
At first that's what it was, platonic cuddling nothing more, nothing less. He'd be your source of warmth and you'd be his.
But days turned to weeks and weeks to months, the grey rain bearing clouds had disappeared and so had the small puddles of water on the road. Instead, lush orange and red leaves carpeted the roads and children ran around, whispers of halloween and joy buzzing the air.
And it was on these roads that Kai had cute but awkwardly pressed his lips against yours, asking you to be his cuddle buddy, not platonically nor just for a night- but forever. He asked you to be his cuddle buddy forever.
synopsis: Soobin had you in the best years of his life only to have lost you one unfortunate night. Now that he’s moved on and he’s found someone new, you wish it was you who made him happy.
pairing: ex!Soobin x fem!reader
genre: angst like no fluff, unless you squint hard
warnings: mentions of alcohol, swearing
part of the sour series
a/n: time stamps are readers texts to Soobin
Young love can be so beautiful, yet it can be the most fatal. Some people find their soulmate in high school and become the cherished high school sweethearts that everyone yearns to be. That was you and Choi Soobin. The start of your story began in freshman year when he asked you to the school dance and sadly ended the summer after graduation. You two were the solid couple of school, the couple that made others envious and that brought pride to you knowing that people wanted what you had. A perfect relationship. What they didn’t know was there are always two sides of a mirror.
[10:15pm] y/n: we broke up a month ago
[10:15pm] y/n: your friends are mine you know I know you’ve moved on and found someone new.. some other girl who brings out the better in you
When you and Soobin broke up over the summer, you were devastated, yet you were the one who broke it off. You didn’t want to handle the heartbreak of having to go to a different college than your now ex-boyfriend and he didn’t see it as a problem. Typical for you to let your fear cloud your judgment, but you were only human and humans make mistakes. This was your mistake and you had regret it since the night you did it. You told Soobin you fell out of love with him, lying to his face as if he couldn’t see right through you.
[10:18pm] y/n: I thought my heart was detached from all the sunlight of our past but she’s so sweet..she’s so pretty, does she mean you forgot about me?
“You don’t mean it.” He said, laughing at the stiffness in the air. You just told him that you don’t wanna be with him anymore and he was having a hard time believing you. “You’re lying to me, aren’t you? Baby tell me you’re lying to me.” He said, desperate for you to give him what he needed to hear. “I’m sorry Soobs..but I can’t be with you anymore.”
[10:37pm] y/n: do you tell her she’s the most beautiful girl you’ve ever seen?
[10:42pm] y/n: or eternal love bullshit that you know you never believed
[10:42pm] y/n: remember when you said it first to me?
Walking away from him that night meant you were walking away from love. You were hiding your heart for safety and instead it yearned for his touch. You knew moving on wouldn’t be easy, trying to piece yourself together and fix the broken pieces where Soobin used to be. You did this too yourself, so why were you acting as if he was the one who left you? Why were you pretending he’d ask for you back. Why did you lie to yourself when he found someone new.
[11:08pm] y/n: now I’m picking her apart as if cutting her down will make you miss my wretched heart
[11:10pm] y/n: she’s beautiful..she looks kind, she probably gives you butterflies
Three weeks into your breakup and he was posting dates with a mystery girl. Your friends begged you to not look at his page anymore, but seeing how all the memories of you were now being replaced made it even worse. You cried for hours, clenching onto the pillow he used to lay his head on. It used to smell like him, now it was fading away just like you were to him.
[11:29pm] y/n: you can say it soobin..say you love her baby just not how you loved me
You turned to alcohol to drown your sorrows, as if it’ll numb your pain completely.
[11:29pm] y/n: think of me fondly when your hands are on her..think of me when she’s around
Sitting on your bedroom floor, there’s pictures of Soobin scattered along your rug. His smile, his dimples, everything about him was so perfect in that moment. Now, he’s giving someone else that exact same smile. Showing off those exact same dimples. Giving her the same butterflies he once gave you.
[11:47pm] y/n: I hope you’re happy soobs just..not how like you were with me
You don’t know what time it is or how long you’ve been sitting on your floor, but the pain in your heart was overshadowing the ache in your back from poor posture. The alcohol numbed everything but your bleeding heart, pouring into your hands and making more mistakes you’ll regret in the morning.
[12:03am] y/n: I’m selfish I know but damnit I can’t let you go
On the other end, Soobin was awake. He was reading each text you sent him while trying to contain the sobs he let out in memory of the two of you. His lover, sleeping peacefully next to him, was oblivious to his breaking heart.
[12:23am] y/n: find someone great to spend your life with, but don’t find someone better than me so I’ll always have you
You did, he thought to himself, you would always have him with you. Even in that moment, as he laid next to another woman all he could think about was you and if you were okay. He was constantly worried, asking his friends if they’d heard from you. They knew your state of health was slowly deteriorating the more you drank, but they knew nothing but Soobin could pull you back together.
[12:47am] y/n: I hope you’re happy…but don’t be happier
He wasn’t, he’ll never be happier with anyone other than you.
#.author's notes:: huge thanks to xie for beta-reading this!! love you lots <3
sweat ran down your neck and temples, staining your top and coloring the fabric a shade darker. you groaned as your head pounded, the song from earlier still replaying in your mind. as you half-closed your eyes in exhaustion, your feet brought you to the cafeteria's vending machine, resulting in you bumping your hip on one of the tables.
"fuck" you cursed, mumbling to the table "you're just always in the way"
you let your head hang low for a few seconds before bringing it up to look at the snacks and drinks. you scanned them one by one, hesitating while searching your pockets for cash.
it was late and the cafeteria lights were turned off, leaving you in the dark with the only source of light coming from the hallway. you're once again staring at the rows of snacks, biting your lip in concentration as you hesitate between the two most unhealthy snacks of the machine, when a mouvement from the corner of your eye suddenly catches your attention.
you turn, staring warily at the hallway. when silence overtakes the room, you turn back to the machine in front of you.
after deciding which snack you would take, you pushed the coins in the slide, hearing them clinking. with an ache in your shoulder, you pressed the buttons one by one, slowly so as to not mess up the order. pushing the final button, your eyes travelled up from the keypad to your long-awaited snack, watching it slide towards you before falling down-
and getting stuck against the glass.
you whined loudly and closed your eyes in frustration, bumping your head on the glass repeatedly to make it fall.
"hitting your head won't help but continue if you want some pretty bruises on your forehead."
you shrieked and jumped, your body crashing into the vending machine harshly. a chuckle echoed of the walls and as your eyes landed on the person, you sighed in relief. "god kai, don't scare me like that ever again," you spoke up, leaning against the machine.
he chuckled again and walked towards you, stopping right in front of you as he leaned down. you could feel his breath on the side of your face. "need any help?" he asked.
a nod from you was enough for him to stand up straight and hit the side of the machine with his fist. you pulled yourself together and turned around to see your snack fall down. the tall boy leaned forward once again, opening the little drawer and retrieving your snack before handing it over to you with a smile.
you smiled back and blushed, thanking him before looking away.
"are you done for the night?"
you shook your head, "not yet, i'm having some trouble with some choreo. you?"
this time, it was his turn to shake his head, lips in a thin line, "if you're having some trouble with choreograhpy, i'm not letting you spend the rest of the night here alone."
you only giggled. he was going to be exhausted tomorrow. though you had to admit that you didn't mind him staying with you. he looked puzzled as you laughed freely, which made you laugh even more. "dumbass" you said between giggles.
he stopped walking and turned his whole body towards you, tilting his head to the side, "dumbass huh?". you put your hands on your hips, leaning forward to whisper, "yeah dumbass."
a mischievous smile adorned his face and less than a second later, he had stolen your oh-so-precious snack from your hands and started running up the stairs, giggling like a kid the whole time. you ran after him, trying to catch up, "hey come back here! i swear, i meant it affectionately! don't make me run after you!"
but the boy already was two floors above you, cackling and shouting a "come catch me, lazy!" from the staircase.
instead of being the mature person of the story, you let your inner child free and followed him, running up the stairs with haste, you called out for him, because in the end, you could never say no to huening kai.
with your hands on your knees, you try to catch your breath, lifting your head slightly as to send a death glare at kai, –who's trying his best not to laugh at you.
"huening-kai, i warn you, you have five seconds to give me back my snack." you speak up as you walk over to him, throat dry from the running.
kai looks at you from his seat on the floor, back pressed against the wall mirror of your practice room, as he smiles sweetly. he starts to crack up when you begin to count to five, holding onto your snack in his hoodie pocket.
just before you can say five, a hand wraps itself around your wrist and pulls you down quickly. you finish with your butt on the ground and a chuckling kai next to you. you groan and pout as he begins opening the plastic, unwrapping the cereal bar and breaking it in two, handing you a half and stuffing the other in his mouth.
you look at him baffled and he turns his head towards you, smiling widely at you with crumbs on his lips. you playfully push his face away, hand pressed against his left cheek.
"hey, you have the bigger piece!" you protest. "which is really unfair as i paid for it!"
he swallows the snack before throwing an arm around your shoulder and bringing you closer. "don't worry, i'll pay you back. i promise."
you quirk a brow, "and with what may i ask? you're always the one saying you're broke!"
he laughs again but this time, it's softer and it lasts only a few seconds before it dies down. he looks down at you and smiles softly, brushing a stray of hair out of your face. he blushes slightly and whispers almost in embarrassment, "with my love."
your voice gets caught in your throat and your cheeks and the tip of your ears turn red. kai hides his face in your neck and you swallow hard. it's silent for a few seconds and you try to focus on your own heartbeat, –which is going wild, instead of his heavy breathing in the crook of your neck.
when you realize he's waiting for an answer, your eyes widen and you clear your throat awkwardly. you look at the strings of kai's big hoodie, pulling on one of them as you keep your head low. taking a deep breath, you lift your head up and gently take kai's face in your hands, gazing at him with hearts in your eyes.
he's suddenly very shy and instantly looks at the floor instead of you. you sigh softly and rub your thumb over his cheek, making him close his eyes as he leans in the palm of your hand.
you bite your lip again before breaking the silence with a whisper, "i would like that, yeah".
kai's happy as he smiles widely at you, face inches away from yours. he wraps his arms around your waist and pecks your nose quickly before wrapping you in his arms, chests pressed against each other as your giggles fill the room.
he leans back against the mirror with you huddled in his lap, your face pressed in the soft and warm material of his hoodie. your fingers grip onto his arm and you nuzzle further into him, already feeling sleepy.
his phone beeps in his bag and he knows it's his hyungs, but when he hears your little snores, he decides that it's not worth waking you up. you look so peaceful and cute in his lap.
kai looks down at you one more time to make sure you are comfortable and secure before kissing the top of your head and closing his eyes, whispering a small "we have a deal then"
he falls asleep with you in his arms, your slow breathing filling the room.
part 3 of the txt boyfriend au! don't worry lovelies, there will be a taehyun and huening headcannon as well so don't worry! thanks for being￼ patient anonie!
request: "boyfriend beomgyu too please!! 🥰🥰"
genre: fluff! slight angst and mentions of nsfw content. idol x idol au!
❁ yeonjun, soobin, beomgyu, taehyun, hueningkai
you both were really close friends, usually making jokes and being loud together as usual. where ever you both were there was screams and laughter because of how well you both clicked.
literally the boys know he's￼ obsessed with you, you're all he ever talks about! beomgyu though.... he's a bit dense even with his own feelings!
he denys liking you millions of times but will ￼ literally mope and pout because you laughed at someone else's joke. thats when he starts to realize maybe... he does like you.
he literally one day tells you that he needs to talk to you like so serious, and it kinda scares you... like why is he being so serious omg...?
of course he tries to talk and looks over to see the rest of his band mates watching him to which he screams loudly and grabs your hand ￼ whisking you away.
screams a couple times before telling you about his feelings, he's kinda awkward and trying to laugh it off in case you say no. he's ready to laugh and tell you "it's a joke!" if you reject him.
luckily you feel the same, and you both kinda just stand there awkwardly until he asks if you two are dating now.
beomgyu truly is the worlds best boyfriend tbh. he's the perfect mix of fun,￼ spontaneous, goofy, loving, and especially caring.
he will literally get these fits of affection within him where just jumps on you and smothers you with kisses randomly because he loves to hear you giggle with each kiss.
sometimes he likes to pretend he's going in for a kiss and will reach for something next to you instead only for you to groan to yourself about it making him laugh.
no doubt that he loves to be babied no matter what. he likes when you pamper him, play with his hair, whisper cute little complements while he slowly drifts to sleep with his head on your lap.
he doesn't like the others seeing him be all romantic and lovey dovey with you so he will "bro" you in public.
he without a doubt will call you weirdly sweet pet names because they're funny. probably something like "sweaty" instead of "sweetie" but it's all out of love.
remember his logic always: HE can make fun of you and tease you, but no one else can. he will get kinda ticked off if someone makes a sly comment.
he'd probably play ￼guitar for you if you asked, literally he'd do what ever you asked just dont tell the rest of the guys... not to mention, he will try to teach you how to play as well.
nothing but pranks, literally so many pranks that sometimes when he's a little bit too nice you start to suspect things.
he really does love you though and he says it every night, no matter through text, phone, or in person he will say it each night without fail.
he doesn't cook often but if you're in the kitchen he suddenly takes interest in wanting to help cook. sometimes you think he's just trying to avoid dish duty.
something kinda weird or quirky he does is randomly bite you. your shoulder, arm, leg, anything really he'll bite to show you he loves you.
he'd probably send you screenshots of what ever game he's playing so you can praise him for doing so well. he just loves praise.
expect to have your phone's camera roll full of nothing but pictures on beomgyu that he took of himself on your phone. like literally pictures of his eye, or lips, or like even his hair from the weirdest angles.
if you guys are cuddling watching a show or movie, he will talk and ask you a million questions. he makes comments and will not understand things that hes hoping you understood to explain to him.
he'd probably take you out on ￼spontaneous dates like getting ramen at 3 am, or randomly going to the amusement park.
you'd both sleep in when you guys are able to, theres no waking either of you up. he likes being wrapped in your arms and sleeping till he's rested.
he likes patting your head to show how small you are next to him. he likes feeling like he's taller than at least someone.
he'll ￼definitely bribe you to do things with kisses because that's just his thing. he wants something from the store? he'll offer kisses for when you get home. just how it works.
he's literally one of your biggest fans, he's there to support you as much as he can. he likes you scream your name from the crowd to embarrass you sometimes.
one thing he always does is shows his friends things you've done like stages,￼ variety shows, and just some of your funny moments.
you guys would spend hours thrown on the couch watching anime and snacking.
he'd freak out if you get sick, like full on screaming once he finds out you have a fever and of course he over reacts and acts as if you're dying.
he'd call the boys being like "HELLPP MY PARTNER'S SICK! HELP MEEE!!!!" even if you insist it's okay and that things will be alright.
as much as he teases you, he's so empathetic. you always bring up his mood, and he actually notices when you're feeling down. so he tries to bring up your mood too.
if you think he wont wake you up in the middle of the night to show you the new rank he got in his game you're wrong. he'd whisper "babe... babe! look!" and shake your arm to make you look at the screen.
when winter comes he thinks it's fun to drown you in snow balls and HUGE ones. he just giggles and runs away when you grab a chunk to throw at him.
he sees something you'd like and buys it, no matter how much it costs or your nagging at him to not buy you so many things!
arguments are very slim, but the way that he usually laughs things off can make it a bit frustrating to express yourself.
you always bring it to his attention, how he needs to listen to you seriously and he￼ apologizes and listens. sometimes he beats himself up about it, the way he can't tell when people are seeious or joking at times.
he makes up for it when he comes home with your favorite food and cuddles of course.
beomgyu is a submissive guy. not just in the bed room, he's a bug brat yes but at the end of the day he's submissive and will do anything you say after putting up a fight.
he likes being blindfolded, tied up, touch deprived, and things like that.
he's loud and whiney in and outside of bed. he asks for a lot and is very vocal about things he likes.
like i said before praise him, he loves to hear it and it helps him gets off. especially when he's making you feel good he likes hearing how good he is.
he likes things to be slightly rough, so tug at his hair, bite him, and leave marks, he loves it.
aftercare is important, it shows how much both of you care. he'd lay on you and cuddle you for a while. he gets really clingy and you both take baths together, eat together, sleep together. he literally will not let you go.
hope you guys enjoyed this!! it actually is one of my favorites from this series!
disclaimer: most if not all of my writing contains explicit language; if this makes you uncomfortable, do not interact with my work. all of my writing is purely fictional and is in no way a reflection of who the idols mentioned are as people.
F = fluff | A = angst | H = humor | M = mature themes
∞ = my fav | ☾ = requested | coming soon
╰ ONE SHOTS
⇢ Choi Yeonjun
Dreams of Running Away | F | 1.4k
↳ A long day turns into a long night as you and Yeonjun try to distract yourselves from your troubles, and a seemingly lighthearted plan to run away together leads to something unexpected.
╰ PROMPT REQUESTS
All of the works above were written by me, KJ @yvesaccharine. Please refrain from reposting my content without my consent.
currently my requests are closed because all you lovely people sent in such amazing requests im so excited to start working on! so here is this oneshot for my lovely anon that has been waiting ￼patiently for this. enjoy!
request: 'hii can i request beomgyu taking care of reader bc of a hard day in uni? thank uu<3'
genre: fluff, angst, slice of life, established boyfriend au! non-idol au! (was not proof read)
summary: in which you come home stressed over college and beomgyu is there to help you.
you walked into your apartment with a deep sigh while you quickly striping yourself of your uncomfortable doc martins. part of you cursed at yourself for even putting them on in the first place. they were new, still unbroken in so they left blisters on the backs of your feet. hissing at the pain quietly you waddled into the living room almost tip toeing to avoid hurting the ￼irritated skin even more and that was just the cherry on top of your already extremely hard day.
luckily, it wasn't long until you were in the kitchen retrieving ice to try and relieve the pain for a little. it seemed almost as every little move or step caused the stinging coming from the backs of your feet to worsen. you groaned ￼audibly￼￼, frustrated with the situation but also at how life was going at the moment. you were packed with assignments, almost as if your professors believed you had nothing else to do other than school work. you were only half way through the semester and finding it much too hard to stay afloat with your course work.
not to mention, you missed your boyfriend. although you both saw each other every night, it's been a while since you both had real time together. beomgyu would be sleeping while you woke up for work, and gone by the time you came back from uni. you both truly had opposite schedules but that hour or so you had with him before you fell asleep meant so much. but, even now you hardly got that. you were studying so much that you'd hear him come home and feel his presence around you but you could hardly look up to pay attention to him. it hurt you. you knew these past few days were affecting him as well. beomgyu was truly a sunflower who would brighten the room with one joke, noise, or even look; but you weren't even allowing him to do so with the lack of attention you had been giving him.
before you knew it you felt tears rolling down your cheeks, the pain￼ completely subsided by your thoughts and it made you break down. the ice in your hand melting, mimicking the tears rolling down your cheeks as you allowed yourself to let your frustration￼ out over the kitchen counter. your choked up sobs filling up the quiet apartment, as you no longer cared who saw or heard you let your feelings take control of you.
while you sobbed, the door unlocked but you were far too into your thoughts to even hear it. the sun was still up and hung over the city so you weren't expecting your boyfriend to come home for a long while yet, there he was. his figure frozen at the entryway with a handful of wild flowers as he saw you huddled over the counter and crying. his brows furrowed slightly as he watched, while stuck in place since he wasn't quite sure what to do. "hey... baby?" he asked softly and finally stepped forward a bit. beomgyu and crying never seemed to go well, he would always kinda freak out when you would cry because he wouldn't know what to do in the moment.
you looked up at him, your face puffy and it was almost as if an angel had been sent to you. beomgyu seemed to glow im nothing but his ripped light washed jeans and oversized sweater. opening your arms slightly, the male took it as an invitation to engulf you into his embrace; which he did. the sweet smell of vanilla and honey mixed with just a dash of rosemary filled your nose. it was the smell you grew to love as it was the one￼ signature to your boyfriend. he had wrapped his arms around you tightly, his head resting on your shoulder. "what happened?" he whispered softly, not letting go. the male wasn't too great with crying but physical affection was his ￼strong suit.
"i-..." you started before trailing off. "i wore the wrong shoes today and now i have blisters on my feet that hurt so bad! and in a spot where all my shoes are going to rub against them and i can't even walk without being reminded that they're there because they sting! not to mention i feel downed in school work! it's not fair every week i'm busting my ass only for it to be swept under the rug and covered with a million more assignments! i can't do this, everywhere i go and everything i think about is school and work!"
beomgyu sighed and pulled away to look at you. "why didn't you say anything before baby?" he asked, his tone still soft with you.
"i wanted to but there was never time! gyu—i hardly looked up from my laptop and we never spent time together.... im so sorry." you sniffled in between words as you apologized to him but the only thing he could do was shake his head in ￼response. "why would i blame you for something like that? im a student to yknow?" he smiled softly and pressed a kiss your tear ridden cheek. "i gotta go teach those professors a lesson!" he smiled softly at his own punny joke. seeing him so proud of himself made you smile softly and wipe your tears. "this isn't fair." you said with a pout. to which he responds with a curious head tilt. "i can't be sad because you make me laugh." you continued to pout.
he smiled and shook his head, "why cry when you can cry... of laughter." he chuckled before you his his chest gently. that was your boyfriend for you, no matter what he made you feel better. "look, i know im not nearly as smart as you... or am i as witty but, maybe i can help with your classes?" he suggested. you hated when he called himself 'not as smart' because it was none sense. he was smart, sometimes it amazes you at how smart he truly is. "don't say you aren't—"
"smart, i know you hate when i do babe. but i might not understand those bug numbers on your papers and stuff.... they make my brain hurt." he laughed after cutting you off which only caused you to laugh a long. we wasn't far off, those math problems also made your head hurt. but it was sweet he wanted to help. "what about your classes?" you ask him with a quirked brow. "yknow if you're helping me with my work, when will you have time to do yours?" you added.
"ah! i can do both... MOM" he teased you causing you to smile softly. "don't worry about me, im not drowning here okay? great okay! lets get to work then yes?" he asked￼ cheerfully, happy to see a smile on your face once again.
Pairing: Choi Beomgyu x Reader (ft. Choi Yeonjun & Choi Soobin)
Non-Idol AU; College AU; E2L AU
Genre: Angst; Fluff; Smut
Warnings: language, sexual content
Choi Beomgyu was not my friend. Even calling him an acquaintance would’ve been a stretch… No, Choi Beomgyu absolutely despised me. Which was a problem for two reasons: 1) his oldest brother was practically my soulmate, my other half, my best friend and 2) I'd had a massive crush on the little brat since we were kids.
I didn’t always know that I was in love with my best friend’s youngest brother. When we were young, I just liked to annoy him. And, that was easy. He was so easy to rile up, especially compared to Soobin—who was pretty chill and patient with everything—but Beomgyu would whine and that made it all the more fun to tease him.
When we got to high school, I had slowly stopped picking on Beomgyu. He started reacting with more hostility and became more withdrawn, which was the last thing I wanted. When the maknae stopped hanging around me—and by extension his brothers, I started to feel guilty and even missed him.
But why would I miss him so much? He was just Yeonjun’s kid brother.
Because I liked him.
I liked seeing him. I liked him following Yeonjun, Soobin, and me everywhere we went. I liked him begging to hang out with us. I liked him whining and pouting when I struck a nerve. I liked his attention. And I liked giving him attention.
But he was Yeonjun’s brother. I couldn’t like him. I shouldn’t. But I did.
See, slowly but surely, I started to realize that my feelings for Beomgyu were not the same as my feelings for Yeonjun or Soobin. And, once I realized that, it became hard to be around him when I knew he had grown to hate me while I had grown to love him.
And Yeonjun wasn’t stupid. He knew. Of course, he knew. Maybe not at first, but he figured it out…
“So when are you going to finally confess to my brother?” He asked once, junior year of uni, while we were in the library revising for a test.
Soobin’s head shot up from his own textbook, eyes wide, “Y/N-noona, listen, you know I love you but like, I don’t love you. Like, I like you. As a friend, but I don’t–”
“Not you, pabo.” Yeonjun rolled his eyes. I just silently dropped my head onto my notebook, beginning to bang my forehead on it repeatedly. Maybe if I did that enough times, I’d simply pass away. “Yah! Stop that.” Yeonjun lifted my face and flicked the sore spot on my forehead, making me wince.
“Wait…” Soobin’s eyebrows crinkled, lips pursed, “You like Gyu?”
“She doesn’t like him.” Yeonjun shrugged, “She’s in love with him.”
I stared passively at my best friend, his younger brother panicking next to us. “How did you figure it out?” I asked unbothered.
Yeonjun rolled his eyes again, going back to studying, “You aren’t as inconspicuous as you think you are. I’ve known for a couple years now.”
“Well, how come I never figured it out then!” Soobin shouted, earning a hush from the librarian.
“You aren’t her other half.” “He’s my soulmate.” We spoke at the same time.
And from there, the two only pestered me more. At least weekly, one of the older brothers would ask me when I was planning to confess, and I always answered noncommittally. So they took it upon themselves to start convincing Beomgyu to hang out with us again, much to his annoyance.
He would’ve been fine, happy even, to hang out with his brothers more… If I wasn’t around.
And on this day, the two were feeling particularly sadistic, having arranged for us to study and then subsequently bailing.
“Where are Jun and Bin hyungs?” Beomgyu eyed me suspiciously as I approached the table alone.
I shrugged, trying to quell the rising panic. I knew what those two were trying to accomplish. I never planned when to confess so they did it for me. The bastards. “Binnie texted me that Junnie and him had some errands to run first, and they’d bring us food as an apology in a little while.”
“Whatever.” He grumbled, eyes hardening at the very idea of having to be alone around me. He finally focused back on his work, a small pout forming as I sat across from him.
God I hated when he did that. It always made me want to kiss his stupid, pouty lips even more.
So this time, I did. If Yeonjun and Soobin were going to go to all this trouble to line up my shot for me, I sure as hell wasn’t going to miss it.
I leaned across the library table, cupping his cheeks, and kissed him. Those lips were as soft as I imagined they’d be, and for just one second, it was heaven.
Beomgyu ripped away from me, “What the fuck do you think you’re doing?” His voice held venom, and his eyes were wild. He looked absolutely appalled; I could feel my heart shatter.
But he couldn’t know that. As far as he knew, I was the sexy, sometimes a little bitchy, older best friend to his brother. So I settled back into my own seat with a smirk and shrugged. “Kissing you.” I grabbed my bag to stand. “But since that seems to be a problem, I’ll just go hang out with your brother.”
There was only a flicker of hesitation in his eyes; I could see it. He stood, grabbing me by the waist roughly as I passed him, and growled, “Fuck Yeonjun. You’re mine.”
“Wha–” Before I could finish a word, the breath was knocked out of me. Beomgyu’s grip on my waist was tight, his body pressed against mine, as he held me against the library stacks—out of view of the librarian, of course.
“Shut up.” His voice was deeper than I remembered it ever being, rougher. As was his touch. The contrast to the warmth from his breath on my neck and gentleness of his nose tracing up my jawline made me shudder. “You like me.”
“N– No, I don’t.” I was such a coward, but it technically wasn’t a lie.
Beomgyu pulled back, his grip faltering ever so slightly. But then, his eyes darted across my face, and he smirked deviously. “Don’t lie to me, Noona.”
I couldn’t hold eye contact anymore. “I don’t like you, Gyu…” My voice cracked and dropped to a whisper, but he leaned in closer. His eyes narrowed as he listened. “I’m in love with you…”
He sucked a harsh breath in and backed away. “You–” Beomgyu’s eyes were wild again, and he grabbed his bag with haste. He snatched my hand and stormed out of the library. “Come on.”
I didn’t know how it happened, especially so quickly, but before I knew it, Beomgyu had me back at his apartment and pinned to his bed in nothing but our underwear.
“Say it again.” He gritted out, his forehead pressed against mine while his body straddled my own. I was disoriented. He hadn’t spoken to me the whole rush here, and I was a bit over-giddy with the turn of events. My brain hadn’t really been keeping up with my heart since I kissed him initially.
“Say what again?” I finally managed to breathe.
“Tell me you love me.”
“I love you, Gyu,” I whispered. He inched closer, his lips brushing over mine before he ducked down to nip at my ear.
“Tell me you’re mine.”
My breath hitched, and he bit down harder on my earlobe. “I’m yours.”
The second his lips connected with the side of my neck, my brain short-circuited. Was this really happening? Did he want me back? Did he want me to be his? His. His. His.
He bit down, and I could barely contain the moan that I let out. He pulled away at the muffled sound, a dangerous gleam in his dark eyes.
“Uh uh. I wanna hear you. I want the neighbors to hear you. I want everybody in this building to know that you belong to me now.”
I didn’t know this Beomgyu, but god, I was more than happy to become acquainted. Just the smirk on his normally pouty lips had me gasping, and the trail of his nails scraping down my sides and digging into my thighs certainly helped.
Beomgyu’s mouth met my neck again, teeth grazing and nipping, bringing a low whine from me. He kept kissing down to my collarbone, sucking his mark there, while his hands danced closer to where I needed him. “What do you want?”
“You,” I whimpered, feeling his fingers graze the apex of my thighs.
“I know that, jagiya,” Beomgyu chuckled. He pulled away to peer down at me, amusement danced in his eyes. He looked at me with happiness, something I hadn’t seen in years—no, this had something more. He looked at me with love. “But where do you want me?”
I brought my arms around his neck, pulling him to lay down beside me, our legs instinctively tangling together. “I want you everywhere, Gyu. I want whatever you’ll give me. I just want you.”
His smile brightened, but his eyes darkened. Beomgyu leaned in to kiss me properly while his hands pushed my underwear down my legs. We laid in each other’s arms, making out while he removed my bra and his own underwear. It was no longer so feverish; the want and desire were still prevalent, but it had taken on a different kind of heat.
I pulled away just enough to meet his eyes. “Are you sure you want me?”
“I’ve never been more sure of anything in my life.”
Beomgyu leaned in to kiss me once more, but I stopped him, mumbling, “Then take me.”
I felt that devilish smirk form once again against my lips, and his grip tightened ever so slightly on my hips, slicking the head of himself over my slit as he lined himself up with my opening.
“Oh, jagiya,” he moaned, “We’ve barely done anything, and you’re dripping for me. Really want me to just take you, huh?”
“Yes, Gyu, please ju–” I was begging, but cut off as I felt him thrust all the way in one swift motion. The sentence died in my throat with a loud grunt, not of pain but pure pleasure.
My eyes rolled back, feeling Beomgyu dragging against my tight walls nonstop. We had never done this before—only in my imagination—and yet, he knew just the right way to move, just the right moments to speed up and slow down, just the right time to pull all the way out only to slam back inside, just the right way to roll and grind his pelvic bone against my clit to have me a whining, babbling mess.
I could feel myself edging closer, toeing the cliff that I desperately wanted to fling myself over. And somehow, Beomgyu was able to tell.
“Don’t you dare cum without me, jagiya,” he growled, pushing me further towards ecstasy. “I want to cum together.”
I was dizzy and sore and lightheaded in all the right ways. I could barely speak, barely think. I could only focus on how badly I wanted to hold it together, to be good for him, to cum with him.
Beomgyu let out his own, absolutely sinful, moan as he peered at how blissed out I was. His hair was obviously damp with sweat, sticking to his forehead, and yet, he’d never looked more beautiful. One hand clamped tightly on my hip, keeping the heavenly tempo as he ground deeply into me, the other cupping my neck, Beomgyu seared me with another kiss and growled into my mouth. “Cum.”
I couldn’t disobey.
Falling over the cliff felt like flying. Falling over it with him felt like heaven.
When I managed to come back to my own body, Beomgyu had already returned from the bathroom with a washcloth, gently cleaning both of us up. He smiled softly, his eyes full of adoration, when he climbed back into bed with me. We rested like that for a while, just curled up around one another, before he broke the peace.
“So how long have you been in love with me?” Beomgyu beamed smugly.
I snuggled into his chest, embarrassment burning through me knowing that he was going to hold this over me forever. Call it karma for my years of tormenting him. “A long time… High school maybe, but I think I’ve liked you even longer.”
He giggled, something I hadn’t heard in years. “I’ve been in love with you a long time too, y’know. I remember having the biggest crush on you whenever you would come play with us when we were little. But you always teased me and gave Jun-hyung all this adoration, and then when we got a little older I remember telling a friend that I still kind of liked you. They told me I could never ask you out though; it was against ‘bro code’ since you were hyungs’ friend. I wasn’t going to listen, but it kind of got in my head. I thought maybe you liked Yeonjun-hyung or even Soobin-hyung since you were always so sweet with them. And then… I don’t know, even the teasing stopped, and I figured you were bored of me or just put up with me for my brothers.”
His voice saddened as he spoke, and I peaked up to see the far-off look. “Never, Gyu. It’s always been you… You were so cute when you whined and pouted, but then I felt like you started to hate me so I backed off. I’m sorry we wasted so much time.”
Beomgyu smiled gently, pressing a kiss to my forehead. “It’s okay, Noona. You’re mine now. That’s what matters.”
I settled on his chest again, closing my eyes to rest and enjoy the feeling of him tenderly caressing my back, but was interrupted by the sound of a door closing.
“So do you think she told him? Do you think it went well?” Soobin’s voice sounded from the common area.
Beomgyu jumped as the bedroom door slammed open, and I whipped around with the sheets held tightly to cover me. Yeonjun grinned evilly from the doorway, a very astonished Soobin behind him. “I think it went very well.”
hello beautiful flowers! thank you for loving my resent posts, it really means a lot. this post is a request for a lovely anon, hope you guys enjoy! 💜
request: "txt when they do ur makeup (maybe on vlive or for youtube video)" — anon.
genre: fluff, headcannon. ot5. idol x idol! au.
he'd be very into it, take it extremely seriously he is sat down and focused! ready to do your make up.
he's aware about what somethings are, like lipstick, mascara, maybe even blush. he just doesnt exactly know the order in which they go in or where some if the things go
the video is filled with giggles and just fits of laughter to the point where you both are crying because he keeps asking for help and its against the rules
expect to hear him curse under his breath when something didn't go his way. maybe your eyeliner wasn't even or the lipstick got all over your chin.
you'd use your eyes to give him hints, but he wouldn't get the hint. it would drive him insane and often times he would jokingly yell to try and get answers.
overall, the video is very cute. lots of the time you are trying not to laugh at loud at him and his cute confused state.
he definitely poked your eye with the mascara wand. AND HE FEELS SO BAD ABOUT IT, he's so ￼apologetic, where he even kisses all over your face but that was cut out.
expect lots of kisses off and on camera in between doing the makeup. you're gonna have to hit him! because dang this boy is all over you while doing your makeup!
he makes you think that he messed up super bad just to add another element of surprise for the final reveal.
overall the makeup ended up being no so bad, you're actually shocked at how well he did your make up. lipstick on your lips, blush on your cheeks, and a slightly uneven eyeliner that didn't look terrible.
from the start he prefaces the fact that he doesnt know anything about makeup aside from watching you or the makeup artists do it.
he talks about how soft the brushes are and starts rubbing the product less brush on his cheek because he enjoys the sensation.
eventually, he just rubs his cheek against yours teasingly. and would make shy little jokes about his ￼technique. he knows he'a bad and doesn't hide it.
he will probably mispronounces product names, or call something like eyeliner, mascara and it makes you want to yell and correct him but it's against the rules!
you both laugh while he does your makeup, and he apologizes each time he thinks he did something wrong.
he shows the camera each product with his hand behind the product to make the camera focus on it. he says he's seen the beauty youtube people do it so why not do it too?
because he feels bad he would put lipstick or something on his face very badly on purpose so you're not the only one looking a mess.
it starts off well honestly, eye stuff goes on the eyes, face stuff on the face and when he started putting eyeshadow on your cheeks is when things got kinda messy
he'd chuckle each time he has to wipe your face because he messed up. he literally uses a million makeup wipes... like for real....
overall the look wasn't beautiful, but it wasn't terribly bad. you had dark brown eyeshadow as blush because he sore it looked pink in the pan, and bronzer on your eyelids but he did his best.
OH HE'S READY. he has the most shit eating grin on his face. he knows nothing, but he will act like he's the best at doing makeup. you know by his grin that he's gonna put you through hell.
he starts by spraying water on your face with a spray bottle, using the excuse that he needed to "wash your face". of course, you just sit and smile at him like you were gonna kick his ass.
the comments go crazy about how cute you guys are, and the looks that you guys give each other say so much. at that point in your relationship, you could talk to each other only using your eyes.
you can tell the look was going south when he kept jabbing the brush into colors like blue and green. you could feel the brush going up to your brow and then up to your forehead.
at one point you put your hand up to block his, and you both laugh because you're well aware he's making you all green like shrek but he keeps telling you to trust him.
he's trying to hold in his laughter as he starts using eyeliner to write 'i 💜 beomgyu' on your cheek. he also asks why theres so many products when all he needs is eyeliner and eyeshadow.
before you look in the mirror to see the completed look he holds your hands and begs you not to get mad at him. all while chuckling of course. he also makes you promise you still love him before giving you the hand mirror.
as an added bonus he chooses to do your hair as well, which was another mess :) he puts all the clips and ponytails he can find in your hair.
get ready because even the production team is laughing behind the cameras.
overall the final out come was... well what dod you expect? somehow, beomgyu managed to color your face green from your eyes up. your face was a mess of eyeliner, he gave you a mustache and of course wrote on your cheek. although it was absolutely terrible, it was extremely funny.
okay, he would seriously wanna do well. he's seen you do your make up so much that he feels confident he can make you look at least somewhat decent.
he'd walk everyone through the process, even if he is a little confused he would tell the viewers exactly what he's doing. he says he's doing a "night out with the girls" make up look.
you'd give him hints on what to use and what goes where which at first went unnoticed by the staffs and later turned into the staff having to stop you from even looking at him sometimes! which would cause you both to laugh.
he keeps making confident comments, about how he thinks he did amazing and how you'll be impressed with him, that is until it gets to eyeliner.
he freaks out about his hand not being steady enough to run this mini brush across your eyelid. so he too uses a lot of makeup wipes.
he pulls away for a second to admire his work and says in a cute voice "ahh!! so cute!" while referring to you.
instead of using blush like a normal person he pinches your cheeks because he read thats how the women back in the 15th century did it and he wants you to have a nice glow.
he wants to do a smokey eye and it doesn't go his way so he starts over and changes the "girls night out" tutorial to a "picnic date tutorial".
he literally holds your face in place and will notice if you move! and probably would wine if you kept moving because you were obviously planning his downfall.
overall the look is surprisingly amazing! aside from the remains of some of the black smokey eye he wanted to do before, the look was natural. it was the only way he could bend the rules and avoid eyeliner.
he's super excited to get started! he kinda knows how to start but, part of him wants to be bad on purpose. you can tell by the smile and little laughs he has inbetween takes.
but of course he promises you that he will do well and try his best no matter what. but still, something about his little smile has been giving you a feeling that he might be planning something up his sleeve.
while doing your makeup, he keeps calling you pretty in a cute high pitched like voice. he squishes your cheeks multiple times, and raves about how cute you are even without makeup.
he really likes using the beauty blender, you're not sure why but it he just uses the blender for everything. he also chuckles when he knows he's pressing the blender a little too hard against your cheek when you say "ow."
for some reason he keeps ￼referencing popular beauty youtubers as if he studied for today? he said he wanted to do a halloween look... and HE DID. it could be 5 months from halloween but he says he was inspired!
he uses eyeliner to put whiskers on your cheeks and a dot on your nose which he finds HILARIOUS. you can't help but smile at his laugh it's so contagious!
he accidentally uses way too much blush and kinda panics. he thinks the look is ruined! but he ends up packing powder over it to get the red ness off your cheeks. i mean it was bad it looked like someone had punched you! thats how red it was!
he gives you quick little kisses while filming, and blushes when the staff teases him about it by going "oooOooOO".
you don't have a cat head band so he draws the cat ears on your forehead, he also connects alive from your nose to lips and tries to make the end of your lips look longer.
he laughs while telling you that he tried his best because he really did. but not everything goes his way. he tried to do cat eye eyeliner but he was too scared to put the eyeliner so close to your eye so it is sitting kinda awkwardly on your eyelid.
overall the look was... interesting. you could tell what he tried to do. it wasn't terrible but, it was cute. you both laughed about it in the end which was cute. not to mention he let you put whiskers on him with eyeliner as well so you both could look cute at the end.
thanks again for the request!
i currently have a lot of requests i'm plowing through! if you are interested in seeing if your request is being worked on, you can always check my navigation! tap here.
coco's ♡ note: this has been sitting in my drafts for almost 3-4 months now and just last night I decided to take it upon myself to finish it at 2am when I randomly got a splurge of inspo and motivation to write! so I hope you enjoy <3
He likes lip glosses tinted with more daring colors. Maybe a red or even a nice purple one. While he'd prefer to not kiss you with it on he also tends to favor ones that have a balance of shine and stickiness. I think he'd also like ones with sparkles, probably even uses them himself when he wants a nice finish with his tint, that's why tinted are a bonus! He thinks of them as a 2-in-1 deal.
He hates lip gloss but if you insist then he'll like the ones that have a minty finish. He hates stickiness so definitely buys you oils instead. Prefers without sparkles added in, just a good plain clear and full of shine will do! I would avoid tinted around him though because baby is a little pale so if you kiss him with it on...it might be visible and a scandal could follow! He probably says he doesn't mind but let's be honest he's very into safety and would prefer not putting yours at risk so stick to something thats easily hidden or easy to clean up!
Honestly, this man would complain SO much about how he absolutely hates your lip glosses because "they're sticky y/n" and "they get all over me when I try to kiss you" but he's the main one buying you them. Like seriously the boy comes back to the dorms with a bag full of new glosses for you to try almost every week. He even offers up the old "guess the flavor" game, thus revealing his ever so obvious true motive. Still, he claims he hates them and that he's only playing to help YOU! Not HIM! YOU!
He literally does not care what you wear because by the end of the night it'll be gone, BUT if he had to choose, he adores the pretty compact ones that give you just the right amount of sparkle and shine. He also likes the ones with a doe foot applicator because according to him those are the quickest ones to apply and this man is always on a schedule, not that he minds letting you take your time though! He does prefer you without gloss though since it's less of a mess!
He adores all your lipglosses really, from glosses that are extra sticky to the ones that are oily and give the perfect mix to blend a pretty lip! He especially likes the ones that have a flavor to them though, he just likes that after he gives you some nice smooches, he's able to taste the nice fruity or soothing flavors. His favorite would probably be like coconut bliss or something with an odd name but he doesn't mind too much. He is also one of the boys who doesn't complain when you wear them and even offers to get you more!
𖥻 Genre: 4 cups of angst, best friend!au, unrequited love
𖥻 Warnings: None
𖥻 Song: If It Is You (Rosé)
(Please know I finally opened requests! So if you’d like, I’d love to write you a ship, reaction, imagine/scenario, or just even thoughts about txt!)
» At first, you thought that Yeonjun reciprocated your feelings
» With all those smooth, almost flirty remarks he made to you every time you saw each other... seriously, how could you not?
» That’s when you came to a decision once noticing your heart belonged to your best friend, Yeonjun
» After pining for so long and wishing he was yours, you decided that you would just tell him instead of hiding under the facade that the two of you were only close friends
» So with a pounding heart and flustered cheeks, you drove to Yeonjun’s house in search of the boy that made you complete
» Knocking on the front door, you were surprised when there was a loud groan in his house before said boy slowly opened the door... with only a towel wrapped around his torso
» You looked away immediately before he could speak, “Jjunie, I-”
» “Who’s that girl?” A sultry voice purred, interrupting you from inside the house, “when are you going to be back? Jun, I need you.”
» Your eyes widened and you swore you heard your heart crack from inside, eyes glistening with tears that you tried to force away
» “I’m sorry,” he smirked, not taking notice to the hurt in your face, “I’m a little busy now. I’ll call you later, yeah?”
» And there he just slammed the door shut once you murmured an almost audible okay, fists clenching tightly at how much heartbreak tore at your chest
» You just stood on his front door step, tears spilling hopelessly onto the white porch when you realized that you would only be a friend to him your entire life.
» You were irrevocably in love with Soobin, your childhood friend beginning from the time you first met him... which meant that you were there for his heartbreaks as well
» His significant others came and went, and each time you hoped that he would be able to see you instead of other people
» But he proved you wrong every single time when he introduced you to yet another person, hoping the two of you would get along since after all, you both were the most important people of his life
» You hated how much you were still very much hopeful that he would look at you instead of the other way, so with a brave face you called him over once you were finished studying
» Of course your friendship with him was incredibly precious and you hoped that he would be by your side forever, but the love overflowing in your heart was unbearable- something you couldn’t take because all you saw was him every time you closed your eyes
» Soobin assumed that it was another movie night but you were blankly sitting on the couch, staring into space as if something was occupying your mind
» “Is there something wrong, Y/N? I thought that-”
» “Soobin, I’m in love with you! I can’t hold it back anymore, but I love you... so so so much that it even hurts... I don’t mean to wreck what we have now, but I just couldn’t take it any longer,” you blurted out without any hesitation, watching his face for any sign of reaction
» He was paralyzed in his spot, eyes gentle with sadness as he said, “I-I’m so sorry, Y/N...” He paused before his soft voice whispered, “but you’re my best friend, and I can’t think of you as anything different...”
» You immediately forced a smile onto your face when you heard that, hoping that he wouldn’t possibly be able to see how much it stung even if you were an open book
» Soon after Soobin left because of the awkwardness, causing you to sob endlessly into your pillows. You’ve always helped him whenever he became depressed from his breakups, and now he himself was the cause of your heartbreak.
» Alcohol affected people in many, many ways
» And with you accidentally confessing everything to everyone- even if it was embarrassing- you chose not to drink at a social situation ever again
» But when you came to a party with your best friend, Beomgyu, who stupidly gave you a drink once he saw how scared you were, you just couldn’t say no
» That decision led to one of the worst moments in your life.
» In fact, you weren’t even thinking of confessing your feelings to Beomgyu in the first place
» Were the feelings themselves little? ... clearly not, but you did your best to hide them in fear that you would destroy your friendship with him
» The night went like this: with you drinking too much and throwing up in one of the rooms, causing Beomgyu to take care of you like the good friend he was
» Bringing you outside to the side of the house, he patted your back as your stomach took multiple twists and turns, creating butterflies in your stomach that you mistook to be the cause of Beomgyu who continually kept asking you if you were okay
» You just smiled at the boy of your dreams who was trying to take care of you, murmuring almost incomprehensible words of ‘I love you more than a friend’ that he couldn’t understand at first
» “N-no,” the grin on his face faded once he realized what you said, “you’re lying... Y/N, you can’t possibly have feelings for me! We’re best friends!”
» Hearing that you instantly pushed him away clumsily, getting up on your feet to run away before he could see your tears
» ... well, you aren’t sure now- you haven’t talked to him in a while ever since that night and now that he’s got a significant other
» In all your life, there wasn’t anyone else you had ever looked at except Taehyun
» He was literally perfect... it didn’t take too long for you to fall for him with the two of you being in your first year of college
» He picked you up whenever you were sad, he was there for you and loved you like a best friend- something that you did up until a few weeks after meeting him
» It was as if the stars brought you together even if your personalities were vastly different, and you held onto that hope no matter how many times he called you his close friend
» One day he called you over to a cafe and you dolled yourself up, hoping that he would find you attractive- only to find someone he was extremely affectionate with right in front of your seat.
» “Y/N, this is my significant other!” He pointed at the person beside him, who waved with friendliness towards you
» In in instant, you felt the world crash upon your shoulders and you gasped something out once the two of you were finally alone, “Tyun, can we talk?”
» “What’s up?” He said with worry, leaning closer to you when your voice was nothing but a whisper
» “I-I... I love you. I just had to tell you, and I’m sorry if I ruined this friendship but I needed to tell you!”
» With a sad expression he explained everything to you as gently as he could so as to not hurt you. However in the heat of the moment you ran out of that cafe, unable to pick up his calls in fear that you would break yourself even more
» Does he ever realize how much you still think of him? Even if the two of you separated a month ago?
» Kai was the best person you could ever ask for, as someone who would forever stay by your side
» He was the best friend you could ever have, so why did you ever gain butterflies for him and him only?
» You saw something more every single time you hung out with him- in those eyes that sparkled whenever he saw you and that contagious smile you never got tired of
» Shamelessly you did your best to show him that he was something more... perhaps through prolonged stares, subtle compliments, and laughing at his jokes even if they were too cheesy to be funny
» And normally you had friend dates right? Friend dates...
» So this time you both chose to spice up your closets with a few new clothes!
» Whilst you were shopping for some clothes together, Kai brought you along to one of his favorite stores for a few opinions
» Everything was going swell until...
» “You’re so cute, Kai,” the words accidentally slipped out of your mouth when you saw him come out of the dressing room
» Picking up on all of your signs (one thing that he was incredibly suspicious of before), he shook his head with confusion
» “We’re just friends, right Y/N?” The boy smiled awkwardly when he saw your face fall apart, “Just friends...”
» “Yeah,” you admitted, looking away from him so that your tears wouldn’t be able to be seen, “just friends even though I’m completely in love with you.”
Released: October 24, 2021. (12:55pm)
Thoughts: Wow. Getting friendzoned is absolutely horrible, omg... I mean I never have since yk keah big scaredy cat to confess her feelings in the first place but like... geez.... that’d make me feel terrible... STOP IM EDITING THIS A MONTH LATER AND I REALIZED THAT I JUST DID STOP 😭😭🙏💔
Waking up to Beomgyu pressing soft kisses against your shoulder blade was one of the best feelings ever.
One of his hands snaked around your naked waist, as the other mindlessly played with your hair, massaging your scalp. A small smile played on your lips as you turned towards him, his sleepy eyes finding yours.
"Good morning, my love."
Your heart fluttered at the cute nickname letting out a small good morning as the said boy chuckled. Beomgyu leaned towards your lips, which you swiftly avoided, successfully earning you a dramatic gasp from Beomgyu.
"What was that about?" He whined, trying to capture your lips again, which you again successfully avoided.
"Morning breath gyu," You snorted watching his annoyed figure raise an eyebrow at you. It didn't last long though, his annoyance had now morphed into one of his infamous bratty smirks.
"I'm going to go freshen up-" You weren't even allowed to complete your sentence. Beomgyu had pulled you under him, his body encasing yours and pinning you against your bed.
"What made you think I'll let you go that easily, sunshine?" He rasped against your ears and now you were pretty sure you were the attractive shade of a fire engine.
Pressing butterfly kisses along your jaw, you involuntarily leaned into his touch, letting out a small gasp when his teeth found your skin.
Smirking against your skin, he deliberately dragged his kisses towards the corner of your lips. Now it was your turn to be annoyed. You knew he was doing this on purpose, he knew how weak you were for his kisses.
"Gyuu, just kiss me already,"you whined but Beomgyu just looked at you innocently, moving a strand of hair from your face.
"But morning breath, my love."
And with a final evil, evil laughter, he had hastily pressed a kiss against your temple before leaving you flabbergasted on the bed and yearning for more.
God, this brat is the reason your mornings were like this.
A/n- this was my first one-shot and idk how to end it so I hope you liked it dhsisbjs (also I don't write smut :v)
“Hail Mary, full of grace. the Lord is with thee. blessed art thou amongst women, and blessed is the fruit of thy womb, jesus. holy mary, mother of God, pray for us sinners, now and at the hour of our death, Amen.”
SUMMARY: moving into a new school life isn’t easy at all, being dropped into the religious and (not-so) prestige lifestyle was certainly nerve wracking for you, especially considering the incident at your previous school and with the worry of secrets and rumours getting out. however, when confiding in a certain person, he somehow takes all your worries away. what happens when your past incident is reflected onto another person at your new school? after promising yourself not to love someone again so easily, will he be the exception?
PAIRING: choi soobin x fem!reader
CONTENT: fluff, suggestive, angst, religious themes (catholicism)
WARNINGS: suggestive scenes, cursing, a little blasphemy, mentions of nude leakages, smoking, death, some plotholes
FEATURING: yeonjun & kai (txt)
A/N: in no way shape or form am i trying to force a religion down on people, this was only for fun and fictional purposes only !! nude leakages is something that’s brought up quite a lot in this, so if you are triggered by that i suggest not to read this. also, this story may often stray away from its catholic theme at points. i will proofread this again soon for the 1836th time later ! ALSO IM SORRY THAT THIS IS QUITE LONG MY BAD, i tried splitting it into parts so it would seem shorter when reading it :) lastly i hope you enjoy this fic because this is genuinely one of the best things i’ve ever written and i spent a lot of time on this, so i really hope you'll have fun reading this <3
PARTS: 1 - intro, 2 - same but different, 3 - the party, 4 - confessionals, 5 - cliché, 6 - together, 7 - redemption, 8 - mother meredith, 9 - OMG, 10 - only just the beginning
feel free to tell me your favourite moments/chapters from this fic, i would love to hear them !!
1 - INTRO
you were sent to a private catholic school, and you weren’t saying that it was due to your ‘bad behaviour’ in your previous state school, but it was exactly because of that. you weren’t particularly a terrible nor rude student, you were very good academically actually, but you just so happened to be centred around a terrible and rumoured ‘scandal’ at your previous school, which made your life a living hell there.
in addition you hated arguing with your parents, so you just sucked up to the bitter idea of moving to a new school. a private school with also a religious institution at that. since you did well academically, you managed to snag a scholarship at a high ranking school. however, a religious based private school being the pick chosen by your parents was one totally out of your train of thought.
you’ve attended here for almost a week so far, and let’s just say that you’ve hated the experience.
of course, you tried to maintain a good sort of behaviour so you could somehow fit in nicely, and not only were you attending a catholic school, but you were also boarding here too. luckily, the boarding house was super cosy, it was even better than your own house if you had to tell the truth, so you had no problems with staying there.
however, you wanted to return back home, but also not at the same time. you missed waking up in the morning to the town’s signature and ominous, foggy haze and you missed your walks to your favourite park. but, going back to your hometown would mean meeting the people who you grew to hate; people who recognised you to be someone who you were not.
you’ve really tried your best to leave a somewhat reasonable impression here in the past few days, but some people were really testing your patience. the students here were either extremely, spoilt rich kids or firm church kids and there was no in between. it was terrible.
many have tried to pry into your business about why you had moved here during a random term so suddenly, but you persistently rubbed them off.
today was your first sunday at dorms and you didn’t expect that you would actually have to visit the local church (more like cathedral rather) for mass, which was just a walk down the block. your parents didn’t even give you any pre-warning about it.
did they think that suddenly forcing a religion down your throat would make you clean completely from something you didn’t do?
you were framed, but they failed to listen to you about that.
they were already ridiculed with so much shame from the situation that they even refused to listen to their own daughter.
you had no idea of what was going on anymore nor what was happening with you mentally, but your main motto at the moment was to just suck it up.
so after the boarding supervisors woke everyone up, you got dressed and remembered how your mother told you to at least pack nice and formal clothing in your bag. you looked at her baffled that afternoon, but simply complied without questioning her, but now you fully understood why.
you were all called to the main room after a beforehand breakfast and then made your way to the cathedral nearby, in a formally manner as directed by your supervisors.
you had never been to such a grand place before, of course you’ve been to the normal type of communal and small churches in your local area plenty of years ago, but this foundation had a whole different atmosphere.
as you entered inside the strong scent of incense hit you instantly and as you continued to walk further inside you made notice of the finely painted tapestry of imageries that covered the ceiling of the grandiose building. there were many other people and families scantily sat at different pews.
the students in front of you had automatically clasped Bibles and hymn books in their hands from the stands at the side and you followed them as so. afterwards, your teacher calmly directed all of you to designated pews somewhere around the middle of the various rows on the right column.
observantly, you continued to look around the majestic yet captivating building. you noticed on the side there was a vast area filled with lit up tealight candles stationed next to one another. a statue of mary was also in between the two stands of candle-lit trays. her hands were laid open and out in an inviting manner. one or two people had stood in the area with their eyes shut and hands put together benevolently murmuring a silent prayer.
you looked down carefully to your fingers which were calmly splayed across the holy book. the whole ambiance was so otherworldly and serene it made you nervous.
if only you could feel this. you’ve rarely had a connection to any sort of God but you hoped maybe being here could sort that out. maybe your mind could be in the clear from everything. maybe you would no longer feel that the world is against you if you did end up staying connected to God.
you continued to look around like a fish, completely mesmerised by the place until your eyes catch on a certain person. he calmly sits down at a pew alone, clad in a white button-up shirt and black slacks. he’s sat diagonally in front of you in the opposite column of the congregation. you can’t make it out to see his face fully but his side profile was completely entrancing to look at.
his deep black hair, which shone so silkily under the rustic chandeliers of the cathedral, was neatly parted to the side and his jawline was sharp. the boy’s skin looked as smooth as soft porcelain and the side of his eye glinted just a little. his round and glimmering eye was keenly focused on the large altar at the front.
he looked so damn good that you almost forgot about everything around you. stay focused, you opted.
as you continued to be mesmerised by no longer the church but the boy, who looked roughly about your age, your fellow boarders and classmates suddenly stood up beside you. a few grand notes on the organ had began to play and your heart raced. shit. did you miss something?
quickly, you stood up too following their doings. they all had their hymn books opened on a specific page and started singing collectively and you stood there completely confused.
you noticed a few stares coming towards you from a supervising teacher and you quickly decided to avert your eyes elsewhere with embarrassment. immediately, you looked over to see what page number the hymn book was on so you could flick to it in your own book.
the mass proceeded onwards and there were a lot of words that the congregation were supposed to say collectively and eventually you got the hang of it, especially with the help of the peer on your left. you didn’t know her name but she could tell you were a sort of newbie to this. bidding prayers soon came around and then a prayer which wasn’t on the sheet was suddenly being spoken.
“as we say… hail mary, full of grace, the Lord is with thee.”
“where the hell is this prayer on the sheet?” you asked the helpful girl beside you whilst flipping over your sheet and scanning each word attentively.
“this prayer isn’t on the sheet, it’s usually one that people have memorised.” she mentioned quietly.
it was definitely hard, you were brought up in a catholic household, had communion and all that but then your family gradually stopped attending mass for a few years until it was no more. you never asked why, but now you were curious. did they lose faith? or could they have just not been asked to attend anymore? it could’ve been neither.
you haven’t been to a mass like this in actual years. but as if you were compelled by some sort of spell, you started to remember some of the words to this specific prayer. the hail mary. it was one of your favourites if you were to be honest.
“pray for us sinners, now and at the hour of our death, Amen.”
after some more time you went up for communion, being thankfully reminded to place your left hand on top of your right. then mass eventually wrapped up and honestly you learnt a few things. one, was that these people liked singing a lot. two, never kneel down for too long otherwise you won’t be able to stand up, and that was actually something you remembered from those years back. the kneeler cushions were not comfortable to endure for long periods of time at all. nevertheless, the whole service honestly brought an unusual yet comforting sense of nostalgia to you.
despite learning the few things and following the mass accordingly, your eyes had continued to stay glued on the one particular boy you had noticed from the start.
he was so attractive and for what? your brain completely went wired when even taking a single glimpse at him.
he had this aura about him that was so alluring for some reason. he had a lean figure and looked really tall actually, his height making you fall head over heels for him even more. he was now picking up his books and making his way out of the pew.
“hey, does he come here often? like, is he a local to this church?” you asked your peer nudging her shoulder gently. she glanced in your direction of view and instantly her eyes widened and a slight shade of rose tinted her cheeks.
“he goes to our school, actually.”
“what? are you for real?” you asked with your jaw hung open.
“yes, that’s choi soobin. surprised that he’s at church, to be honest.” she admits and brushes a strand of hair behind her ear. there’s something up with this guy that you feel like you don’t know, but everyone else does. how comes you haven’t seen him around?
“he wasn’t in all of last week, and the week before that. apparently he went abroad for a family funeral… but some say it was just some prolonged rendezvous, but i guess he’s back now.” she stated.
“come on girls, let’s go.” your teacher prompted interrupting your conversation, the both of you collected your books and left the pew.
“you’re going all rosy when i’m talking about him. who is he really?” you whispered over to her as you finally made your way out of the cathedral with the others.
“choi soobin, as i said before. he’s something alright. that’s all i can say.”
“he’s somebody that everyone is dying to date at some point in their life. word around is that he’s quite a risqué person but also a frequent churchgoer. strange isn’t it?” she said turning to you before quickly catching up with the rest of the girls ahead. you quickly jogged over to her in order catch up as well.
“yeah i guess. so you said everyone? does that make you too?”
“i mean, yeah.” she admitted and you nudged her once again.
“he’s a sweetheart too. i’m partners with him for history class.” she goes on and on and you two continue to have a long conversation even as it strays off to a different topic.
“oh, i’m dani by the way. you’re y/n aren’t you? newbie prepping was quite the bit.” she smiled.
“yep, that’s me. nice to meet you dani.”
monday came around soon enough, and you were gently cruising around the school with your backpack slung over your shoulder eloquently. after last week’s tour around the school you finally got the hang of navigating around the school blocks.
the uniform for this school also wasn’t that bad, the blazers were a dark crimson colour with matching plaid skirts. furthermore, the school in itself was absolutely stunning. there were numerous classrooms, a vast and clean outside compound, ceilings with swirled structures and pillars. the floors were always polished and the school garden was a whole forest of botanical beauties. there were so many facilities and clubs too, you felt spoilt for choice.
everything about this place said ‘private school’ all over it though. it was no surprise that you had entered here through a scholarship, because there was no way your parents would’ve been able to afford the sumptuous fees for this school.
as you continued to walk around you noticed a poster on the notice board stating that there were confessionals open with the school’s chaplain every monday and friday after school. maybe you should make a stop by, it seemed like a good idea anyways. you continued to think about it and before you even knew it you were running late for your first period.
quickly, you made your way to your pshe class and slipped past your teacher who seemed to let you off the hook. this was your first pshe class so you were kind of stuck on where to sit. however, your wandering eye faltered to the only spare seat in the room. next to a certain someone… that someone being a person you recognised from the mass yesterday.
his beautifully sculpted face was in full view before you as his eyes locked on yours too. gosh, he was even more handsome than you expected. his head was lazily rested against the palm of his hand and you were lost for words as he continued to gaze you down.
“ah, newcomer. i’ve assigned for you to sit next to soobin, which is the only spare seat in the room. so please take a seat and don’t be late again.” the professor stated making a gesture towards the empty chair. you only gulped and carefully walked over to the spare chair muttering a small ‘thank you’ to the teacher.
the classroom was dead silent watching your every move, except for the boy you were sitting next to. he hadn’t spared you a single glance except from when you had entered inside the room.
you really wouldn’t have expected a moment like this to even happen at all. from thinking you would find him unapproachable at church yesterday, to now being his partner for a class.
to be honest, you had no idea on what to even say to him but you just mentally reiterated the face he had when he gazed you down. damn, he was so fine.
carefully, you placed your hands down on your lap fiddling with the cotton material of your skirt. there goes your nerves again.
“so what’s your name?” he asked. you didn’t know how to capture his tone, it wasn’t unfriendly neither open to you.
“y/n.” you replied and you briefly noticed the very small yet awfully cute smile that showed up on his face. not only did he have killer looks, but also a killer smile too… oh goodness. you didn’t even notice his dimples that indented both of his smooth cheeks at first.
“nice name you have.” he stated before sitting up and turning to you shortly then looking back at the whiteboard to copy down notes. surprisingly his notes were all neat and cute, well you couldn’t really say that was a surprise.
was dani really telling you the truth? this guy, is the same one who performs indecent acts on school grounds? you wouldn’t believe it. you won’t believe it, mainly to satisfy your own needs.
occasional looks and glances at each other were often shared and when he explained some of the work to you, you didn’t fail to notice the brush of your bare knee against his clothed one. it shouldn’t have affected you in such a way, but it certainly did. plus, you couldn’t tell if the action was deliberate or not.
“and i was thinking that’s more ethical.” he continues to go on about God knows what and you’re only focused on the contact between you two. class ends before you even know it and he’s packing up his minimal things.
“nice meeting you, y/n.” he said and smiles as your name rolls of his own lips. he can’t lie, he really likes your name.
not to mention how you loved the way he said your name. your heart thumped tremendously the moment those words left his mouth.
“i’m soobin by the way.” he said before sauntering off.
the tiresome school day ended and you headed straight off to the school chapel. surprisingly, the small hall was emptier than you would’ve expected it to be. you’ve been in here before for assembly on wednesdays, which you attended last week, however it was so strange to see no sign of anybody in here, it felt more tranquil like this though.
although the chapel wasn’t as grand as the cathedral, it was certainly pretty and respectively decorated. you had time to kill since you were boarding here, but either way you wanted to make this thing as quick as possible. you noticed the lit green light over the brown wooden door, so you guessed it was vacant. carefully, you knocked on the door and a taller woman in a long floral dress and a white rosary dressed around her neck greeted you with a wide smile.
“welcome! come in, come in.” she repeated with enthusiasm and a dear smile, her voice radiated the energy brought here; nothing but calmness.
“you must be the new student, how are things going for you here?” she asked.
“not so bad.” you stated honestly whilst taking a look around the room.
“it’s just i’m not used to these catholicy things that much anymore, you know.” you continued and she nodded. you respected her for not questioning you at the word ‘anymore’, since you weren’t in the mood to talk about your previous religious life because that’s not what you came here for.
“ah i see that’s perfectly fine. as you spend more time in such a blessed environment i’m sure you’ll become more accustomed to it.” she smiled sweetly and you only hummed. maybe this change could be for the better. you can start on a new leaf and focus on something else for a change.
“so, i assume you came here for confessionals. please do sit.” she insisted and you nodded taking your seat at the singular leather chair.
“great, let’s start with the sign of the cross first and we’ll get talking.” she says whilst doing as so and you followed what she did.
“also just a reminder that i’m not permitted to tell others about what you confess to me. it’s something between you and i, and the Lord of course.”
well that’s a relief.
so you told her. you told her a lot about your past situation at your old school. you almost started losing composure at remembering the story. you spilled more than you intended to spill and although you were quite nervous, she managed to help you quite a bit. your thoughts slowly began to run wild too. you were in between asking yourself, what if these walls weren’t soundproof? to what happens if rumours spread round here too?
she really talked you through it to calm down your nerves and you started to feel a tad bit better.
“i’m glad that you’re confessing all this, y/n. i truly am, but remember you must come to confessions if you want to reconcile for a sin you’ve committed. to me, it’s looks like you’ve done nothing wrong at all.” she smiles and those words hit you softly.
“but if you still want to ask for forgiveness for anything else, which you don’t have to feel obligated to talk about, we can reconcile for them.”
“i would like that, please.” you replied. you don’t remember anything necessarily bad you’ve done, except for arguing with your mother shortly before you left to come here.
you still felt bad about it up until now. the chaplain made you read out some words from a manuscript, almost like a prayer and she said a few words, then you were called to respond back.
when exiting the confession room you felt slightly better but you didn’t expect for someone to be waiting outside.
especially for that someone to be none other than soobin.
you kept on running into him today and it was driving you crazy. briefly, you made eye contact with him for a split second before smiling then quickly walking away and leaving the chapel.
if he was up for confessions, that means he has something to confess. something to hide. something that needs to be repented for. maybe it wasn’t as bad as you thought it out to be… but dani could’ve been possibly right about him.
but, you didn’t even know him properly and you were already following these assumptions about him. you needed to stop hopping to conclusions. plus, what if he was entirely different from what everyone thought? after all, you new better than anyone else to not jump on rumour bandwagons.
that feeling of tranquility and peace you felt when exiting the chapel was long gone after noticing soobin’s presence at that point. what if he heard what you were talking about? oh gosh, you prayed to God that that wasn’t the case. without no second thoughts you made your way to your dormitory room.
“soobin, so nice to see you. how can i help you?” the chaplain asked kindly.
“hi, miss jenkins. well… i’m asking for forgiveness from God. i’ve done a lot of things i regret to be honest.”
“where do i even start?” he sighed, half-chuckling at his own words and flashing through all the memories that gave him a cold shudder down his spine.
2 - SAME BUT DIFFERENT
dinner at the dormitory dining room was somewhat interesting tonight. it was nothing new having to share gossip around at the dinner table, but tonight everyone was huddled in small groups with their phones out. the screens illuminated their faces whilst they continued to observe their social platforms.
“yeah and i heard she sent them to multiple people on the football team.” nadia, who was sat down next to you, had stated to the girl on her opposite side. instantly you froze at the delivery of her words. they came out cold and bitter, not a nice tone to it all.
surely you weren’t the problem… right? if you were though, nobody would’ve sat next to you right now. you also probably would’ve been given dirty and dismal stares.
“what’s going on?” you pried to nadia. who turned to you and brought out her phone showing you her social media timeline.
“nudes, is what’s going on. this girl in our school sent nudes to the whole football team. what else would she have expected if she sent them to the whole team?” she exaggerated.
you made a note-to-self to stay far away from the football team.
but nobody knows the girl’s story anyways. she could’ve been pressurised, blackmailed or even threatened to send out those pictures and you hated even thinking about it.
why weren’t you saying anything? you’ve been through a similar dilemma but you couldn’t bring yourself to say anything. you felt like a coward.
you wanted to say something so badly but it would only stir up confusion with the majority of the ignorant girls here. honestly, you wouldn’t have expected a school such as this to have such controversies occur.
“do you know who the girl is?” you asked nadia.
“nope. but she’s completely done for if anyone ever finds out. they’re lucky they kept her identity a secret.” nadia responds and you bite the inside of your cheek. suddenly, you had lost your appetite to eat. your eyes flickered around the table noticing people continuing their conversations. however, you noticed someone sitting there alone eating her food uncomfortably. dani. it didn’t take long for her to calmly drop her cutlery and excuse herself to the toilet.
“honestly, i would never come back to school if i was that girl.”
“this is what happens when you get too close to those annoying jocks.” another girl retorts and starts pointing fingers at some people at the table specifically.
“hey, it wasn’t me in the photo. seriously!”
“natalie, come on we know how much of a slut you are for the football team.”
“come on, they are hot though. you can’t lie about that, but the swim team is the way to go.” someone else adds.
“oh yeah, speaking of swim team have you heard that soobin’s back in school?”
“all hell’s going to break loose soon, huh?” nadia adds and a few others end up chuckling together.
oh fuck off, could everyone just shut up for a moment.
even though the upbringing of soobin’s name caused you to listen a little more intently, everyone here was out of their damn minds. someone’s confidential photos just got leaked out on the internet and the current talk is which sports team is better than the other? they had no sense of decency. you scraped your chair out and left the table immediately.
“leaving so early, that’s a waste of food you know. you not hungry?” nadia asked and you fought back a small scowl.
“yeah, i’m not.” you said and carried on walking before you were called out to again.
“wait can i have your potatoes?” fiona asked.
“yeah, just have whatever’s on my plate.” you stated loudly before walking into the bathroom to encounter a crying dani. she was leaned against the sink looking up at the mirror to meet your unexpected gaze. she only wiped her tears away quickly and looked away.
“are you okay?” you asked her.
“yeah, i’m fine. just an… allergic reaction from the food. but it’s okay now.” she sniffled and you gave her some tissues from the dispenser. you almost believed her for a second upon noticing her puffed red cheeks and welling eyes, but you knew better than that.
“you can always talk to me if anything. anytime that you feel comfortable enough, i’ll be here.” you said and she came closer a few seconds after to give you a small hug. her tears softly dropped on the shoulder of your t-shirt.
“thanks y/n. but i’m fine, really.” she smiled weakly.
you knew something was wrong here, but you weren’t going to pry into her business. you decided to give her some space but somehow you felt disappointed in yourself. like you should’ve done more to help her out. and if your speculations were true… that it was dani in the photos, you really could’ve done more to help her out.
after all, you had went through the same experience as her.
3 - THE PARTY
it immediately became the talk of the school and you seriously wondered when it would die down, but it looked like it wasn’t going to happen anytime soon.
however, your main priority was trying to find the football team members, especially the captain, as it seemed that they had links to the situation. you needed to corner them and make them fess up somehow, knowing people like them it would be extremely hard though.
“aye, party tonight at raphael’s. you coming?” you heard a boy ask his friend by the row of lockers.
bingo. that should be a hotspot for all students specifically the athletes, but first you needed to know the location. as much as you hated interacting with nadia, she’s quite popular so she’ll know a lot. walking aimlessly in the hallway and being completely lost in your train of thought caused you accidentally bump into someone.
“you. i keep bumping into you.” soobin softly chuckled, holding you into place so you didn’t topple over. instinctively, you grabbed his shoulders and stayed like that for a second or two as if paralysed in the moment. you didn’t know how to describe it but the feeling of his hands on you felt so right. it felt like they belonged there.
quickly, you took your hands away and he slid his away to dip into his pockets before biting on the inside of his lip cutely, his dimples waded both of his cheeks.
“i’ll see you later. are you coming to the party tonight?” he asked and you paused for a moment.
“party, you say?” you asked raising a brow and he smiled.
“yeah, uh i’ll text you the address or i could pick you up? it’ll be fun, you should come.” he prompted. oh it won’t be fun for me. but at least you had a way of getting there now. even though you were falling for this boy even more, you felt like prioritising this current mission of yours was more important.
“i’ll find my way there. i’ll most likely go with some of the girls in my dorm since i bet they are going, but it would be nice if you could text me.” you smiled sweetly. the main reason why you chose this method was to indeed grab his number. however, you were slightly oblivious to that fact that he wanted your number just as bad.
quickly, you wrote down your digits on a small piece of crumpled paper and he thanked you before heading off to class. gosh, tonight was going to be rough.
even though soobin had messaged you the address, you were still being driven by some of girls in your dorm. all of you were arriving later than expected due to your quick and reluctant outfit swap. claudia, another boarder, had urged for you to borrow one of her dresses especially after nadia made a remark on your bland crop top and jeans.
after many of the other girls prompted for you to change as well, you eventually found yourself wearing something that was a casual navy blue dress that hugged your sides and all your of curvature. you didn’t like it at first but the amount of gushing compliments eased your uncertainty. you weren’t used to their friendliness but they were treating you as if you’ve been living here for years, like a sister or good friend almost and you didn’t mind it.
you later on managed to message soobin that you were on your way there. the car ride was lively and the music was enjoyable and it was definitely easing to know that the conversational topic wasn’t of the nude leakages.
you instantly spotted the party house the minute the car made a turn on the specific avenue. the large mansion had all its windows lit up and there were a few people by the front porch smoking joints, drinking and chatting frivolously.
so this is what private school kids really get up to. you would’ve never expected these were the same students to attend a catholic school.
the music from the inside of the building echoed out beyond its walls, you could hear the faint rhythmic beats of hip hop music from a mile a way. fiona parked her car and the other girls quickly entered inside, others ran to meet their friends, some going off to smoke on the front porch as well. simply, you entered inside and messaged soobin that you had arrived.
your eyes were glued to your phone and it wasn’t a surprise that you bumped into someone again. you really needed to stop doing that.
however, it wasn’t soobin this time. it was a male with short, dark hair and greyish eyes that had lingered down on you then on his white shirt that had new splashes of brown beverage spilled on it.
“i am so sorry!” you shouted over the loud music.
“it’s fine, really—”
“do you need a spare shirt? i could help you find one.” you offered and he only shook his head.
“… wait actually, i wouldn’t mind.” he said looking down at his top once again and deeping the dreadful stain, then retreating his eyes back to you.
“i know the party holder, i don’t think he’ll mind if i borrow a shirt of his.” he said and he prompted for you to follow him. to be honest, you would’ve done anything to get away from the loud and pumped atmosphere of the party downstairs, so you were happy to follow him away.
you and the boy travelled up the spiralled staircase to the second floor and he told you to wait outside a specific room. the hallway was quiet, save for the music from down below and the unearthly whimpers and moans coming from a random room on this floor.
suddenly, your phone pinged again and you noticed soobin had asked for your whereabouts.
“thanks for the idea. i feel more comfortable in this than a cold, beer stained t-shirt.” he thanked you as he came out of the bedroom.
“wait, you’re the new student aren’t you?” he asked and you hummed. he took a few long seconds to take in your enthralling appearance before clearing his throat.
“well, nice to meet you.” he replied waving at you lightly then strolling off with a subtle grin that he failed to hide on his face. well, that was kind of awkward.
you looked at soobin’s text, which you’ve accidentally and unconsciously left on read for too long, then back up at the other male who was walking away.
“wait, do you know any members of the football team… perhaps?” you quickly asked the boy and he turned around curiously.
“i‘m part of the football team myself actually...” he continued and your eyes widened immediately. your bold steps forwards instantly made his eyes bulge out of his sockets. what he didn’t expect was a harsh slap to come across his face. you didn’t know what possessed you at that moment but you felt so indignant. it felt like your blood was boiling.
“you asshole.” you seethed. the harsh and sonorous sound of the slap resonated through the hallway and the guy held his reddened cheek.
“what was that for?” he asked shocked at the comprehension of how he got smacked by somebody he had only just met minutes ago.
“you and your whole team are assholes. don’t pretend like you don’t know what you did.” you spat out bitterly.
“y/n, there you are!”
oh, great. perfect timing.
your head swivelled around immediately to the sound of the familiar voice. you felt bad remembering that you hadn’t managed to reply to him and now it looks like you were occupied with someone else.
“am i interrupting something?” soobin asked cautiously flicking his eyes between you and the male before you.
“yeonjun?” soobin asked with confusion.
“hey, soobin. i was just going now. see you around.” yeonjun said awkwardly before walking away and not sparing you another glance.
“what was that about?” soobin asked and you simply shook your head. once his mind was in the clear he began taking in your appearance too. was that just a thing now? maybe you did actually look good after all.
“you look stunning.” he said and you thanked him feeling some slight abashment.
“it’s something that my friends forced me to wear so don’t be so stunned.”
“either way, you really look amazing.” he genuinely complimented and you felt heat rush all over your body.
“let’s go somewhere else, i’m getting a headache from all this music.” you lied and soobin agreed comfortably. the both of you strayed away through the immense and luxurious depths of the mansion. gosh, rich kids really had it all when it came to households. they were all living it up.
you perched yourself on a bench at the empty balcony and soobin sat himself down next to you. tonight, he looked good. as usual, but he had worn jeans and a simple sweatshirt with a denim jacket. his hair was scruffily styled but he still made it look very appealing. he had metal looped earrings, accommodating for some of the piercings that he wouldn’t be allowed to wear at school.
despite being sat next to him at pshe class yesterday, you had to admit you loved being this close to him. the perfect and distinct view of his surprisingly pretty lips always made your thoughts go astray. not to mention how he had this particular scent, one that could differentiate him from a crowd in the best way possible. he just smelt that good. you wanted to snuggle up to him so bad and be held in his embrace for as long as you needed.
you knew the moment you first saw him at the mass last sunday, you would indeed fall for him. whether it was gradually or immediately, you knew one way or another you would fall for him, and now that it was actually happening… you didn’t know what to do.
“you okay?” he asked putting a hand to your shoulder and you felt shivers tingle to your spine exhilarating your whole body.
“yeah, i’m fine.” you lied.
“so… you know yeonjun, huh? are you on the football team too?” you asked soobin curiously. every inch of you was hoping that he would say no.
“no, but i’m on the swim team.” he stated taking his hand off you and you smiled to yourself whilst fidgeting with your dress.
swimmer soobin. now that was something for you to see. you imagined him, coming out of the swimming pool. his damp, wet hair being slicked back by his fine hand, his torso with drips of unrushed water trickling down the tones and faint defines of his chest—
“i used to be on the football team though, like two years ago, was it?… anyways i quit that. i was close friends with yeonjun back then since we were both on the team.”
“wait, why did you quit?”
“it wasn’t my thing at all. i have more of a passion with water now.” he explained and you hummed. sounds like a thing all swimmers say.
you were still thinking about what dani said. if anything he seems nothing like what she explained to you.
‘word around is that he’s quite a risqué person but also a frequent churchgoer. strange isn’t it?’
it’s only just rumours then. and for some reason you still didn’t want to believe that they were true, but either way that was really none of your concern.
“you look bothered by something and i’m worried. do you want a drink?” he asked.
“i don’t drink like that but i’m fine, soobin. thank you though.”
“also i’m sorry about not replying to your texts, i kind of got caught up in the moment of something.” you said and he simply waved it off saying it was no problem. coming here to look for the football team was definitely your priority but that slowly crept away when being in his particular company.
his voice was so sweet and he had a laugh of precious gold. the more you got closer to him the more bad you felt, because you knew dani probably liked him too.
“soobin i— uh…”
“i don’t think you should, mix with me. if you get what i’m saying…”
“no i don’t?” he asked shockingly confused. he knew exactly what you meant but he just felt hurt and startled. it was so sudden and he liked you a lot so he wasn’t willing to give you up so easily. he wanted to get to know you better, spend more time with you, you know?
he was used to a few quick dates with different girls and quickies under the bleachers, but now after the sudden passing away of a family member, he wanted to take things more easy. he really wanted to change. he had thought about it for a while now and his brother’s death became the immediate trigger for taking on that action.
“i don’t know if i’m a good person.” you continued. you said this for your own safety. soobin was definitely well-known around school, and if you were to get close with him that means everyone would be on your neck as well, trying to dig out the worse from you. as much as you didn’t want to keep your distance from him, you didn’t want a repeat of the terrible incident at your past school.
“well me too.”
“i don’t think i’m a good person either.” he admitted.
“look, let’s be each others’ confessionals for tonight.” he suggested.
“you can’t be serious, right?”
“i am so serious right now. think of this as a secular safe space, if you want it that way.”
“let’s keep things said here between you and i, only. pinky promise?” he said bringing out his slim pinky finger. after some momentary contemplation you decided to just fuck it and intertwine your finger with his.
4 - CONFESSIONALS
“so, do i go first or…?” you asked him.
“would you like to go first?”
“i don’t mind.” you said and he nodded insisting for you to go ahead. he shuffled himself over on the patio bench to face you better.
“it all started summer last year before the start of our new term. i was dating somebody who i thought i knew perfectly, but really i didn’t know them at all.”
“he was someone that i thought was sweet, kind and loveable but he was really a manipulative and terrible person. he blackmailed other students and collected nudes from them and when i found out about this, i decided to call things off with him. that’s when things went downhill for me personally.”
“after cutting ties with him he leaked one of those private photos and framed that it was me in the photo. it was a really bad time. the person who was really in the picture, who i still don’t actually know till this day, just went on with it and left me to suffer with all the harsh words and literal things thrown at me. i was constantly shamed and there was a point where i didn’t even want to go to school anymore. nobody in school wanted me there anyways.”
“of course i tried to defend myself multiple times but the shame wouldn’t stop coming and it would’ve continued to eat me up alive if i still stayed in that school.”
“instead of him being the one punished for sending out explicit photographs, i was the one who got shamed and expelled. i took the brunt of it all when it wasn’t even me.” you sighed, your voice slightly cracking at the end.
“worst thing was, they told my parents about it and they completely believed the school. nothing is worse than receiving shame from your own parents and the people who you thought were your friends. i was alone for a good while and i’ve been accustomed to it.”
“being brought into a religion where i can focus on my relationship with someone who can understand me is nice though.” you mumbled.
“come here. now.” was all that soobin said before you fell into his arms hopelessly and you let the few tears shed down. they emptily stained his sweatshirt for a few seconds and you continued to wipe your face.
“i’ll be here for you, whenever you need me. i’ll be here, waiting for you. you really deserve better, y/n.” he stated and you immediately felt more tears beginning to well in your eyes. just thinking about the awful times of how you were mistreated really brought a strong and miserable feeling to you. you weren’t willing to trust soobin so quickly, but his words hit hard. he seemed like such a genuine and sweet person, so you appreciated his comfort.
“thank you, soobin.” you sniffled whilst he wiped away some of the tears on your cheek with his thumb.
“and this is why i’m not tolerating the current situation at all. i want to find out who really sent the picture out. no one ever deserves to go through something like this.“
“can you help me with it, please?” you asked him.
“of course, no one deserves it and i’m more than willing to help you.” he said placing a hand over yours to hold it gently. his touch on yours was super soft, the shrilling shocks and nerves that shot through you really shook you up though.
“well… your turn.” you managed to muster enthusiastically despite the disturbing topic discussed beforehand.
“ah well for me, it started a while back. talking about a couple of years and i was constantly on and off with my elder brother who lives in korea, we fought a lot and weren’t on good terms often. i left to come study here without saying a word to him.”
“but now he died two weeks ago… and i regret it heavily.”
“back at home he was a priest and that was probably one of the main reasons why i was dragged to church every week back in korea. that and my family’s love for God actually. even when me and my sister moved here, she would still drag me to church every sunday but now that my brother’s gone shes been nothing but sorrowful these days.”
“she spends most of her days grieving over him and she hardly pulls me to church anymore. so i do it willingly myself.”
“it’s like through church i can still have that unconditional connection with my brother. if you get me?”
“i just wish i left things on good terms with him but his car accident was totally out of the blue and just so… unexpected. attending church makes me feel like i’m paying off a debt and apologising to my brother in a way.” he said, you could tell that he was trying to fight back tears by the way his face scrunches and how his hold on your hand tightens a little.
“i was never really a holy person or properly understood the concept of religion to an extent, as to why we argued often, but now i can’t help but feel terrible.”
“i wish i could’ve been a better person for him and to not have been so selfish. and i am of course trying to better myself now. i just wish i could see him again, to tell him i’m sorry for everything i’ve ever said or done to him that’s hurt him.”
“soobin…” you murmured softly at the sudden spill of his thoughts.
you decided to let your hand envelope over one of his soft cheeks and caress the supple skin calmly.
“it’s not your fault, it’s no one’s. and we can’t change the past but we can alter the future.”
“i think your brother would be proud of you that he sees that you’re trying to change.” you said and he smiled warmly. you noticed a single tear trickle down his cheek and you delicately wiped it away, reciprocating what he had done for you.
soobin liked you. he liked how you were able to sit down with him and talk about your worries, feelings and the past comfortably, and vice versa. he liked how you listened to him attentively and gave the best comfort. no one’s ever done that for him before. not even his parents, that had willingly pushed him away from their lives at a young age to focus on his elder brother more. his older sister who moved with him here soon became the parental figure in his life, but it just didn’t feel like enough.
he learned how to do things on his own most of the time and he usually refused help from his elder sister. however, he really wished he could’ve taken some advice from her because now he had meddled with many hearts and had done meaningless things with people who meant nothing to him. his sister was always so persistent for the two boys to eventually make amends at some point, if only soobin had listened to her.
his sister was always the one to bring him to sunday mass in the great cathedral. last week, she was too busy mourning to even attend the service, and soobin fully understood, so he left to attend by himself. these days he hardly felt a connection with God, especially after losing his brother but he’s tried to build and maintain a strong faith.
however, when you waltzed into school randomly like an angel, he felt calm strangely. he also felt a sense of warmth whenever noticing your sweet gaze that would cast upon him. from the very first time he noticed you at pshe class he thought you looked angelic, and he didn’t think anything would change his mind from that.
if things continued to fall into place with you two being with each other more often, he would fall for you. and he knew it for definite because he had already started falling for you.
“soobin, are you okay?” you asked. what you weren’t expecting was to be swiftly taken in by a melding and sweet kiss on your lips by the boy before you.
you kissed back.
it was by default. but the feeling of his lips against yours was something you wished to never depart from, you found yourself mixing your lips with his carefully to the echoed sounds of the faded music. the kiss was definitely sudden and did really take you by surprise for a millisecond, but you decided to just let it happen and go with it. you honestly had no oppositions to it and you would be lying to say if you hadn’t already dreamt of kissing him despite knowing the boy for only two days.
you always thought you would’ve had trust issues around unfamiliar guys, but for some reason you opened up to soobin more than you intended to. darn him and his compelling nature.
no words were exchanged between you two as the kiss continued. your hands that were glued to his face managed to slide up higher to dig through his disheveled hair. his hands guided themselves to your waist which he firmly held and circled his arms around. the proximity of your faces increased and it was getting a tad bit messier.
your tongues intertwined as if it was second nature and you let out a small whimper at the foreign yet different feel. gosh, his tongue was kind of long, was your first thought that came to mind.
as much as you enjoyed this, you needed to stop it before it was too late. you weren’t particularly ready for anything more than this.
“soobin…” you muttered breathlessly and you gently dragged your face away. you were both knocked out of air from your lungs, but you felt shameful for breaking such a heated moment.
“i’m sorry.” you apologised. he didn’t looked baffled or hurt whatsoever but he had a small and pleasant smile on his face that eased you a lot.
“it’s fine. i’m sorry that was kind of sudden. i shouldn’t have done it.”
“don’t be sorry. this is kind of awkward, but i enjoyed it a lot.” you managed to say feeling some heat creep up to your neck nervously.
“i could tell, me too though.” he replied teasingly with a cute pinch at your cheek.
“do you want to go back inside?” he asked.
“can we stay out here for a little longer, if you don’t mind?” you asked. being out here, particularly with him was the refresher you needed. it was like you were disconnected from all sorts of hardships and troubles from the real world right here.
“that’s alright, i don’t mind that either.”
after some time the two of you headed inside and grabbed yourself a few drinks. soobin had gotten you a can of soda from the fridge.
“hey, you wanted to talk to the football team right? well, they are over there.” he said getting unbelievably closer to your face to whisper in your ear over the loud music. gosh, you wanted to pull him right in for another kiss but that would’ve definitely put on quite the show. plus, you weren’t one for pda.
you looked over to the group of huddled boys and noticed yeonjun wasn’t amongst them. however, the people you noticed most definitely looked very athletic and self-conceited. you assumed so from their trashy jeans and basic sense of style, and how they also had girls clinging onto them like hooks.
maybe it wasn’t the best time to bring up the situation right there and then. you knew it would spark up big chaos, or maybe you were chickening out? maybe you were too scared to leave a bad name for yourself here at this school already? and if you had to be honest you had no idea. possibly bringing it up to a member of staff would be better, but usually they don’t do shit with situations like this.
“i can’t, soobin. maybe another day.” you spoke to soobin, tiptoeing up to whisper in his ears. as you turned round to look at the gathered group of jocks, you all noticed that they were looking at you specifically all of a sudden.
now why was one of them making their way to you guys?
“passing girls around like flies again are we?” the guy asked and you raised a brow putting a hand on your hip. you didn’t really understand what he was talking about but you knew he was taking some digs at soobin.
“shut up, raphael.” soobin spat out.
“so who’s this? newbie, huh? i’m the party thrower, by the way. glad you could come, you look great.” he stated taking a deep look at you and your outfit, but for some reason you felt uncomfortable this time. his eyes were stern and his smile was severely forced making you cringe internally. you only scoffed and looked away and raphael was definitely surprised by this, even soobin.
“i heard about your brother, dude. total bummer. my condolences, man.” he added and you lost it at that point. soobin had almost seemed to have lost all sense of responsibility and composure as you noticed him clenching his hands into a fist, but he remained calm surprisingly. he only slung a warm hand over your waist and whispered something in your ear that was inaudible to raphael.
“let’s get out of this place.”
5 - CLICHÉ
it didn’t take you twice to agree. so you left with soobin leaving a stunned raphael. people were already blanked out on the front porch, some clearly intoxicated by alcohol and some just high off the feeling of their consumptions. you knew your dorm mates would’ve been concerned about your whereabouts when departing (that is if they weren’t too drunk by the end of this party) but you would hopefully be okay with soobin. you sat in the passenger seat of soobin’s car and he leaned forward on the wheel letting out a weak and exhausted sigh.
“he shouldn’t have said that.”
“i know.” he said. you could tell he wanted to let loose again, but because you were here he didn’t want to seem even more weak and vulnerable.
“let’s go somewhere else, i have a place in mind.”
“sure, but i need to be back at dorms by 9pm.”
“okay… oh wow 30 minutes. that’s enough though.” he said and started the car engine quickly. the smooth car journey was kind of silent and the light sound of the radio music distinctively lightened up the mood. soobin occasionally hummed to the sweet music whilst drumming a few fingers to his steering wheel.
soon the two of you pulled up to a brightly lit up avenue beside a river. bold and bright fairy lights had dangled and twined from one tree to the other as you carefully drove down the road. brown leaves fell down slowly due to the autumn taking it’s toll on the environment. one side of the pavement had a parapet which split the running river from the cemented ground.
the area wasn’t that busy especially at this time of the day, soobin parked his car and he led you close towards the river view. the spotted strings of light were distortedly reflected from the river and the small swishing sounds of the water made all your tension from tonight ease out.
“i come here a lot at night. it’s only beautiful like this when the sun is down.”
“beautiful it is, indeed.”
“just wait till christmas time comes. the lights are colourful and they have all different patterns too. i’ll bring you here again the next time.” he smiled.
“i wouldn’t mind that.”
as you continued to rest yourself against the parapet, soobin noticed your constant shivering. you hadn’t said a word but he knew you were freezing.
“wear this.” he said taking off his jacket and handing it over to you. he knew denim wasn’t the best for warmth but at least it was something. you had only worn a dress so you definitely needed an extra layer.
“don’t. this feels so cliché.” you joked brushing his suggestion off.
“oh come on. so what? i don’t want you to catch a cold so just take it and keep warm. i’m wearing a lot of layers myself so i’m fine.” he murmured and you took the jacket off him reluctantly.
the jacket smelt exactly like him, mulberry and musk. you loved it. his scent completely draped over you like a cape and you were swooning over it on the spot. he could easily tell you were suddenly so swayed and hazed by something that it made him giggle.
“what’s so funny?” you asked him.
“nothing. you’re cute though.” he said.
“… thank you, for this.” you said and he only nodded at you with a small hum.
although he was being such an awful gentleman to you, some of the things raphael said about soobin were questionable. maybe it wasn’t the best option to believe someone like him, but you had a few dire questions to ask.
you felt like soobin was missing out bits of his confession.
“soobin. you mentioned how you wanted to change…”
“who were you exactly before all this?” you asked and he bit down his lip before looking down at his shoes then at the serene river ahead.
“do you really want to know?” he asked.
“yeah, of course. i want to know you better.”
“okay. promise, that this won’t change the way you view me. i really am trying to take a change.” he explained and you replied with a hum. was it that bad?
you were starting to have some doubts.
“i wasn’t necessarily the greatest person. i would get with people then drop them on the same day.” he said. he continued to talk and be honest about himself and you appreciated that. but you truly did feel shocked by this all. you’re just glad that he’s trying to change, and plus the things he did wasn’t necessarily awful.
needless to say, he wasn’t as bad as the members of the football team.
“also. about why i was so keen on speaking to the football team was because i think they spread out the images.” you said and soobin’s eyes grew bigger instantly.
“holy shit.” he muttered under his breath.
“i’ll confront them about it tomorrow.” you said.
well that’s if you can.
later you were driven back to the dormitories and you were just on time for curfew. carefully you waved soobin a goodbye and it was only until you reached your room that you realised you had taken his jacket along with you.
6 - TOGETHER
wednesday was the assembly day. in fact it was your second assembly here and you were sat in between dani and nadia. the chatter commenced by the students had soon died down after the principal had entered the hall and stood by the podium. a not-so-pleasant look was evident on his face
“good morning students. let’s begin with the sign of the cross and the Our Father on this fine morning.”
collectively everyone did as so and said the prayer together, then the principal began speaking again.
“it’s come to my attention that inappropriate images of a student have been shared amongst the internet.” he stated and immediately you sat up straight in your seat. everyone began talking again but that was soon immediately hushed down.
“this behaviour is completely unacceptable and once we find the perpetrator, they shall receive a severe punishment immediately.”
“images as such should have never been taken in the first place. as a reminder, our ethos here is to be obedient to the Lord—”
“sir, those were my photos.” a student in the crowd states loudly.
a random girl had stood up and declared that those photos were hers. chatter began once again as all heads spun around to the girl.
“no, they were my photos.” you called out with a sigh as you stood up folding your arms. at this point fuck it.
you had to stand up for the person who was violated in the end of the day. you needed to be selfless, and to properly take your mind away from the troubles of the previous incident it would be best to do so by helping someone who was going through the same thing as you.
“y/n, what are you doing sit down—” nadia whispered harshly and oh gosh, an even more rile of chatter began at your sudden surmise. the new girl joining in on this too? yeah, definitely a shocker for most.
“no. principal adams they were mine.” another voice speaks up.
“sir, they were actually my photos.”
“they are all wrong. those are my photos.”
“those are my nudes.”
before you knew it a dozen girls had stood up and the principal was left in a tempered state, even the teachers sitting on the sidelines were shocked. nadia was completely stunned at how fiona was one of those who decided to stand up too. you felt happy that a few people here were willing to stand up for something like this.
no one in your old school would’ve done the same thing for you.
“everyone sit down now! miss dianos, your triggering stunt is not appropriate on these grounds, you are to meet me after this assembly.”
“as for everyone else, we’ll get down to the real victim and aid them with pastoral care.”
after assembly you got all sorts of glares but you didn’t care, you felt good.
“thank you, y/n.” dani said coming up to you then quickly walking away. before you could even replied with a simple ‘what for?’ or ‘thanks’ or to even ask how she was feeling today, she had dashed away.
you were concerned for her and it felt as if she was wanting to tell you something, but couldn’t bring herself to say it. you continued to walk to your first period and suddenly two hands had covered over your eyes causing you to stop in your footsteps and bump back into someone’s body.
“hmm, i don’t know. maybe ryan gosling or something.” you smiled and turned around to the smiley boy behind who rolled his eyes.
“saw what you did back there. i was really tempted myself to stand up and say they were my own too.” he said.
“you’re unbelievable.” you said punching his arm.
“sorry! i’ll see you later okay?” he said giving you a wide smile and you nodded waving him off. gosh, you haven’t felt this happy in a while.
then you remembered.
that kiss yesterday. how the hell did you guys even get there?
did he decide to forget about it or was it just you holding onto unnecessary thoughts? you hoped he didn’t regret the kiss because that would surely be embarrassing. once turning your face away from his distancing figure you noticed someone else looking at you.
it was the yeonjun guy.
“oh no.” you noticed him mouth as you walked towards him.
“wait. i need to speak to you, properly this time.” you said.
“promise you won’t slap me again.” he jeered, bringing some unwanted attention to the two of you. you agreed muttering a small apology about that. eventually, he complied without any words said but only a wry expression shown on his face. you led him outside to under the bleachers at the empty school field, the damp grass reeked of fresh morning dew and the air was humid.
“your stupid team sent those photos out didn’t they?”
“i’m honestly not certain on that myself. i hardly interact with the others outside of a teamwork related basis. i’m not that great friends with them either—”
“all i asked was a yes or no question, yeonjun.” you state lifting up a brow and he raised a smirk.
“look. newbie, i’m being completely honest that i don’t know much shit. i was sent the photo, i’ll admit. and it definitely took me by surprise because it had appeared in my inbox so randomly.”
“i never asked for them for it, and never would’ve done so anyways, so i was just really confused. i deleted the message though, so i’m sorry little miss detective that i can’t supply you with much evidence.”
“woah. woah, wait. who sent the photo to you?”
“originally it was from a completely random email but after looking at it a little more, it seemed like a guy on our team named, kieran. hardly ever spoken to him so i was suprised when i got an email from him. was even more surprised to find out what it was.”
“i promise i didn’t do anything with the photos though, i didn’t spread them out anywhere at all.”
you didn’t have the appeal to trust him just yet but his words seemed genuine. quickly, you thanked him before making your next move to who you were targeting next. you didn’t know who kieran was or what he looked like but he was on your hit list.
you spent your whole day searching for this kieran guy, despite lessons, and it was a complete fail. you were now planning to ask soobin for any help or any knowledge of this kieran guy. you had lingered around the hallways waiting for soobin to appear but he was nowhere to be seen. however, your wandering eye lingered on a sign on the notice board.
prayer club — tuesday after school
swim club (team only) — wednesday after school
quickly, you left to travel to the swimming hall which you had never been inside of yet. it was in a whole different compound and you found yourself doing a lengthy exercise around the school blocks. eventually, you made it and cautiously opened the glass door in an attempt to sneak in.
“yes, that’s it! go on!” you heard an elder voice echo across the vast swimming hall. you stepped closer by the tip of the escalated seats but what came to your attention was a fast body rippling and piercing through the water ever so gently but at a ridiculous pace. this guy was super fast.
“and done! that’s the fastest one so far. well done, choi!” the coach said and the guy emerged from the water gulping for some air. your air was effectively knocked out of your lungs the second you realised who that was.
why didn’t you even notice sooner?
he quickly exited the pool and received a pat on the back from his coach and a few fellow teammates. soobin slipped off his goggles and dragged a hand over his face whilst still catching his breath. his lean figure and exposed torso was right there and in front of you, just as how you imagined it. he yanked off his cap, fluffed his hair around whilst flinging a few stuck strands away from his eyes.
he was painfully attractive. the way the drips of water slid down his skin... and how he wore tight swimming briefs that left little to no imagination.
gosh, you would’ve banged your head against the wall to stop yourself from imagining such deluding things. before you could even notice, a few teammates had their eyes on you as the coach began to give them a pep talk and one of those pairs of eyes eventually became soobin’s.
you waved over to him diminutively and he only smiled at your presence.
soon the coach dismissed them for a small break and soobin came up to you practically cornering you against the wall where you two weren’t visible to no one else.
“and you came all the way here for?”
“oh, s-stop it.”
shit. not you stuttering.
“i came here to ask about a boy named kieran. he’s part of the football team. do you know anything about him? his usual whereabouts?” you asked curiously almost tripping up on your words and he only pouted.
“well, i used to be partners with the idiot for history class. he used to date nadia for a bit, i’m sure you know her. i don’t think he comes in anymore though, i swear he would’ve dropped out by now.” soobin said and you grew shocked.
“don’t tell anyone about this but, he was dealing and got suspended for a while. he comes back at random times but to be honest i don’t know if he’s been expelled by now. last time he came in was like a few months ago.” soobin stated.
damn. looks like you’ll have to hop to nadia for this one. all this hassle for what?
“i see.” you murmured and began to drag yourself lazily to the door at your failure so far.
“you’re leaving so early?” he asked.
“yeah, i have stuff to do, homework to complete and a case to solve. no one’s doing it like me.”
“awe. total bummer. at least stay for a little longer.”
“channeling your inner raphael i see?” you smirked.
“how did you know?” he grinned.
“coach won’t mind if you’re a companion of mine, stay please and rest for a bit. plus, you get to see how much of a good swimmer i am. where’s the wrong in that?” he cheekily smiled, his damp hands tugged at your blazer sleeve. although you did have lots of things to do, another partial reason you wanted to leave was because you felt like you would melt in this very place upon watching soobin swim and just be so hot in general.
“i’ll take you out to eat after practice.”
“fine.” you complied with a frenzied smile after he completely sold you on the idea. he pulled you along and you sat down at a random row of chairs high up to watch him.
when you expected soobin to take you out to eat you would’ve expected some good drive thru fast food or something, but no. you were properly taken to a deluxe restaurant nearby, fully in school uniform. some people had stared at the two of you as to why these school kids were in one of the finest and most expensive restaurants in town.
well, you didn’t know why either.
but anyways you enjoyed yourself, you always enjoyed being around him. however, you were now back in your dorm fighting the urge to speak to nadia at this late in the night so randomly. but in the end you did, and after some hesitation she spilled exactly what was needed. despite nadia being a jerk she seemed awfully calm about your sudden questionings for her ex.
“so why do you want to know all of this?” she asked curiously.
“because i want to help somebody who’s in a bad situation and i know it was him who sent the nudes to everyone.”
“wow. good samaritan much?” nadia remarked as she had leaned herself against the wall and you rolled your eyes.
“anyways, that’s his address and number… that’s if he hasn’t changed them already, i advise staying away from him though. i don’t know what he’s up to these days, heard it’s sketchy shit though.” nadia sighed.
“thanks.” you said then nadia began to walk off.
“also nadia. maybe try to side with the victim on this one. boys aren’t always so innocent.” you smiled before walking off to your room and that left her in a complete silence.
as soon as you got down to your room along the hallway, you called the number and you were surprised for the person on the other line to pick up. however, it was just heavy silence with some occasional breathing.
“hi, is this kieran?” you asked and suddenly the breathing stopped and you realised the call had been cut. he must’ve hung up.
you couldn’t falsely accuse someone about this whole debacle to the headmaster without proof. but you felt like the culprit was most definitely this guy. was there even a point for this if he no longer comes into school?
no. he needed to face the consequences, harshly.
you texted him abruptly and you were startled to get a quick reply afterwards.
‘who are you?’ he asked.
you were tempted to type out ‘your worst nightmare’ or something embarrassingly platitude but you just decided to settle with something simple.
‘a student from merdium high who knows you sent those nudes out.’
he then started typing then stopping then typing again and you knew you got him there.
‘turn yourself in or i will.’ you typed feeling rather grand with yourself.
‘how do you know it’s me?’
‘where’s your proof anyways?’
‘i’m going to block you whore.’
the fact that he wasn’t denying it was all that you needed to know. oh, you’ll get your proof alright. you just needed the time and patience.
‘wait and see.’
was all you typed before switching off your phone and chucking aside.
7 - REDEMPTION
it had been several weeks since then and you had gathered all the information you needed from various members of the football team, and with the help of soobin as well. it was indeed kieran who sent out the photos and he was facing serious consequences with the law enforcements for it. no one still doesn’t know the true intention for his actions, but it was definitely without the victim’s consent. the school were now taking matters into their own hands and a few students had set up a campaign for the situation. it finally felt like life was getting back on track and pieces of a jigsaw puzzle were fitting into place.
with solving this case you also felt part of yourself being redeemed.
it was a sunday morning and mass had just ended, and dani had unexpectedly pulled you to the side to whisper something in your ear.
“y/n. you probably would’ve guessed this already, but i was the girl in those photos. yeah, it was me. i just didn’t know how to tell you, i was so ashamed. i know what you did for me and i can’t thank you enough. this means so much to me, you don’t understand. although i’m still recovering, your help really pulled through.” she spoke quietly with tears pricking at her eyes and you instantly gave her a tight hug with a few small back rubs.
“it’s okay, dani. it was no problem. you’re fine now.” you smiled. you had to admit you were extremely glad that you were now the one to be giving out the comfort to someone else who crucially needed it at the moment.
before being able to give her another hug she fled away and gave you a goodbye. whilst everyone else was departing, you were held back by the pair of eyes that were lurking on you from a distance.
you noticed soobin looking at you, leaning carefully against the blank wall and you promptly made your way over to him as he led you downstairs to an isolated room in the church.
“you’re an amazing person. i hope you know that right?” he spoke walking closer to you and holding your hands in his.
you forgot to mention how spending time together in this particular room after every sunday mass was kind of your thing for each other now. over the past few weeks you had grew ever more closer with him. attending more of his swimming practices, studying together more often and generally hanging out together more. it was like you two were two peas in a pod.
your mind swept back to reality at the feeling of your back pressing then soon arching over the cold surface of a table. you splayed down on the centre table pulling on soobin’s tie, which consequently pulled his whole self closer to your body in an instance. you always loved how he wore his formal attire to church, he always looked so sophisticated and gorgeous, it was beautiful to see.
he let out a small chuckle before clasping his lips on yours. he only leaned in further and you raked a hand through his soft strands of hair. your legs entwined around his waist and he started ravaging your neck. the crucifix upon the wall right before your eyes made it hard for you to keep yourself focused. it felt like you were being watched and ashamed for endowing in such acts.
you had to admit, a church certainly wasn’t the best place for this type of stuff.
if you looked at yourself a month before from now, carefully watching him and wondering who the hell this fine guy was, you never would’ve guessed you would’ve been in this position now. literally.
“wait damn, i may have to go now. mrs. halton will be wondering where i am. i’ll catch up with you later.” you said reluctantly not wanting to depart from soobin so quickly. he only pouted and you gave him a quick kiss on the cheek before hopping off the table.
“wait, y/n?” soobin asked unsteadily and you hummed turning to him whilst sorting out your clothing.
“i have a swimming competition, tuesday in two weeks time. i would really like you to be there if you can.”
“of course! i’ll be there, i can’t wait to see my little swimming star.” you cooed hooking your arm with his and he only smiled with a small eye roll.
“i’m literally 6 feet tall and gigantic in comparison to you—”
“aht aht. hush.” you smiled putting your index finger to his lips and he only laughed at your cuteness then gave your finger a small kiss. you both walked out together and bid each other goodbyes before going your separate ways.
later, in the evening, your phone had pinged and the person who had texted you was soobin.
‘are you free tonight?’ he asked you.
without knowing any of his implications you simply replied with a ‘yes’.
‘my friends want to fuck around and visit the school late at night. you down to come with me? tbh i’ll only go if you come, it’s ok if you don’t want to.’
you also heard some of the girls in your dormitory main room negotiate about it a few hours ago, so you assumed it was kind of a big thing. it took you some time to reply after thinking about it.
did you really want to break into the school in a terrifying nightly atmosphere? probably not, but if it was with soobin then maybe you were okay with it. you agreed to going and he spammed a bunch of cute emojis making you cackle, however the bursting open of your room door made you jump.
“so you and soobin huh? tell me about it.” dani asked excitedly as she sat on your deskchair and shut the door behind her. she casually swivelled around in your chair and you only smiled.
“we’re not dating before you ask.” you said.
“i wasn’t planning to ask that anyways. he’s really changed, you know. i feel like it’s because of you.” she initiated.
“trust me, it’s not. he’s a nice guy though, really sweet too.”
“cut the nice guy stuff. do you like him?” she asked you and quickly you fell silent, for too long at that.
“maybe i’m prying too much. sorry. i was just excited, you guys look cute together and everything, i’ll go now.” she said getting up from the chair.
“wait. dani.” you said.
“i think i might like soobin.”
8 - MOTHER MEREDITH
“and they say mother meredith, the nun who founded this school lurks between the hallways at night.” kai calmly said and flashed a torch up to his face whilst telling one hell of a myth about the school.
what you would’ve have expected to be a break-in was rather a creepy historic tour of the school, sponsored by some members of the swim team along with a few others who decided to come.
“that’s bullshit, kai.” someone spoke up and the small crowd chuckled. although the school was dark and the torch at the front was the only light source, you still for some reason felt your heart tremoring with fear. after exiting the outside compound, everyone entered a corridor which you recognised to be the maths department, but everything felt so creepy now that all the lights were off.
soobin, on the other side of you, decided to enveloped your hands in his due to this. although the building was dark, you could imagine his smile vividly in your head.
“did you guys know that the art studio downstairs used to be a shelter for—”
suddenly, kai halted his words at the sudden yet almost inaudible screech of a chair in the distance. it didn’t even take seconds for each of us to scramble off into completely different places in absolute fear.
“it‘s only mother meredith everyone! she just wants to say hi!” you heard kai shout as you dashed away. you instinctively pulled soobin along with you to the furthest depths of the school.
this was a big mistake.
carefully you stumbled into a room and noticed it was the principal’s office after switching on the lights. you slammed the door shut after soobin entered inside and leaned against the wooden surface letting out heavy gusts of breath from your exhaustion and terror.
“i’m never agreeing to do this shit ever again.” you huffed out whilst sliding down to crouch on the floor.
“me too. this was a bad idea.” soobin sighed as he put a hand to his forehead. the silence was nonetheless quite awkward, the only sounds of each other’s heavy breaths were heard, which eventually synchronised with each other.
you felt the urge to speak up or to say the most random thing just for the fun of it, but he beat you to it.
“you have to admit this is fun though.” he laughed.
“yeah, because having an apparent headless nun follow us around the school is so fun!” you reached sarcastically.
“don’t tell me you actually believe that?” he laughed even harder and you raised up a brow.
“kai made that act up for sure. i heard him discussing his plan with some of the boys beforehand. but mother meredith was a real person though, she was actually the nun that founded the school.” he confirmed and you almost felt queasy.
“well now i look like an idiot.”
“so what was that noise back there then?” you asked curiously.
“i actually don’t know.” soobin replied, his amused face suddenly dropping at the scary realisation.
“yeah, maybe we should get out of here. let’s go on a drive.” soobin suggested and you simply agreed. the both of you fleeted out of the premises through the way you originally came in and ran towards the car park.
the first stop was to grab some late night food and to much of your comfort, it was fast food this time. you ended up enjoying your meal whilst singing to a few songs in the car along with soobin. however, time definitely whizzed by and it was way past your curfew yet you were still out.
“shit.” you muttered glancing at the time on your phone.
“you can stay over at mine if you want.”
the first time he’s ever suggested that. the first time that you would go to his place.
“is that really okay?”
”yeah, it’s no problem at all.”
upon arriving at his apartment suite, you were definitely impressed by the spontaneous view of the city in the distance he had from up high. you couldn’t believe he would get to come back home to a place like this everyday after school. he told you how his sister had insisted for them to live separately. you could tell soobin wasn’t the most organised and tidiest person in the world though.
you two managed to just relax with watching a short movie before falling asleep on the sofa together. when waking up the next morning you had almost forgotten you agreed to sleep over at his place. he had a beautiful sleeping face however.
the position, which you took a while to comprehend, had you in a flustered mess. you were lying closely to him with one hand circled around him and one planted on his chest, then a thought came back to you. you would usually sleep with hugging a pillow, but this time you had an actual person to hug.
“morning, sleepyhead.” his low voice erupted. the reverberations from his chest caused you to jolt up slightly.
“i— soobin i think we might be late for school.” you mentioned and he sat up immediately.
“shit, i don’t even have my school uniform with me.” you whined and he only hushed you by smoothing a subtle kiss on your lips.
“ew, morning breath.” you said pushing him off and getting up. he only smiled tugging you to sit back down and subsequently you fell down on his lap. his hands circled down around your hips and he rested his head in the crook of neck giving it a light nuzzle with his nose.
“or we can skip today? that’s probably not a good idea though.” he sighed.
“yeah. i’m a scholarship student, it’s not good for me to start mucking about.” you said booping his nose lightly and giving it a small kiss. you swivelled around to circle your hands loosely around his neck, his own wound delicately back around you before pulling back into another kiss.
“wait we aren’t actually late. oh my gosh.” you said as your eyes had lingered up onto the clock on his wall.
“i’ll quickly drive you to the dorms.” he said grabbing his keys quickly and you both exited the house dashing back down to the school.
by the time you made it the girls were already having breakfast. you really tried sneaking by the busy table of girls passing each other bowls of fruit and plates of toasts, but like meerkats, all their heads had turned to you. some asking what was going on, some teasing you to stay and explain yourself. you only shoved a piece of toast in your mouth from one of their plates and ran down to your room to get changed rapidly.
9 - OMG
it was one of those days where you were accompanying soobin after school to a private swimming session. usually the coach would just be observing and coaching him on the sidelines as you watched it all happen. today, however, the coach couldn’t make it but he insisted for soobin to carry on practice normally since he had fully trusted his best swimmer.
so it only left you to observe soobin and cheer him on. but something felt wrong today.
he was swimming at an irregular pace and definitely slower than usual. you just assumed that he was tired and would probably rest at the end of his current lap. once noticing that his body had slowed down even more to almost not moving at all, you stood up from your chair immediately.
“oh my God.”
all sirens were ringing in your head to help him right away. luckily, you knew how to swim but the last time you swam was at a holiday resort almost 5 years ago, which wasn’t helpful at all. but you didn’t hesitate running down the aisle of stairs and flinging your blazer to a random row of seats to help him. he was drowning for all you knew.
quickly you jumped into the pool still fully clothed but you didn’t mind.
you found yourself swimming closer to him and even more closer until you lifted up his body with your bare arms and swam a little higher up to the surface. it was definitely exhausting to swim with his taller figure towards the edge and haul him up to the poolside with care. you almost thought you would’ve drowned yourself.
you couldn’t tell if he was breathing or not and you started to panic terribly. after stripping off his goggles, you noticed his eyes were shut and his mouth was slightly perched open.
“cpr is what comes next.” he speaks up.
“ah, yes right,” you replied with even more panic and inched your face closer to his.
“wait a minute…” you stopped yourself midway at realising what had just happened.
“soobin, what the hell!” you practically screamed.
you couldn’t even tell if he just faked this whole situation but after noticing the visible smirk on his face you knew it all.
“that wasn’t even funny. you could’ve passed out… or something even worse.” you murmured gripping his bare shoulder tightly.
“so you care about me a lot? i see.” he smiled, squishing your cheeks together and you pushed his hands away.
“of course i do idiot. why wouldn’t i?!” you admitted and he froze upon hearing those words. despite the rather provocative position you guys were currently in, he felt endeared and heart-warmed by your truth.
“now i got your heart going all erratic.” you smiled whilst putting a finger to his soaked chest and indeed his heart was beating tremendously fast. it was thrumming so violently you could’ve sworn it would’ve leapt out his chest.
suddenly he gripped your wrist, which hovered over his chest, tightly and leaned his head in closer to kiss you. his other hand curved over to the back of your thighs letting his hands ride up higher than your pleated skirt.
“that’s for saving my life.” he said and you got off of him and folded your arms still annoyed with his little act. he got up his taller body inched over yours and cornered you until you were standing at the tippy edge of the pool.
you turned around to look at the pool that was just centimetres away from your footing and before you knew it you were forcefully delving deep into the pool. soon coming in contact with soobin’s clear and cheeky face opposite yours. the both of you swam up to the surface to the more shallower end.
“i actually cannot believe you. oh my gosh.” you choked out whilst hitting his chest and he combed some of your hair back.
the both of you ended up in a giggling fit before climbing out of the pool. let’s just say it was very perplexing for some people to see you entering your dorm room with a completely drenched uniform without knowing the context.
days passed by quicker than expected and you were soon in the same very seats for the swimming gala. the school’s swim team was up against many other competitive schools. you had dragged dani along with you and nadia, who surprising wanted to tag along for some reason. nadia and you had been hanging out a lot more than usual lately and it was strangely nice. she’s still her usual self but she is definitely a bit nicer than before. to be fair, she’s really only nice to the people she tolerates.
once the relay race commenced you felt yourself screaming to the top of your lungs for your school’s team. and once you it came round to the last person, soobin, to stand on the podium and ready himself you instantly felt your heart thump. of course you were nervous. currently the team was in second place, but you knew soobin could do it. he could turn it around.
he strapped his goggles on and, seconds later after positioning himself, dived in over kai who had just made it to the end of his race at a good time. your thoughts became right in an instance once you noticed soobin speedily creep up to the first place position then making it past them. you screamed at that point, the two other girls doing so too and cheering him on, and just like that merdium high’s victory came in clutch.
once making it to the end he looked at the scoreboard and splashed his fists against the water in triumph. he climbed out the pool and you tried to make yourself seen by screaming his name out, and boy did he notice you quickly. you gave him two thumbs up and he only laughed and waved at you so happily.
you would never forget that extremely happy smile of his that stretched from ear to ear.
okay, it was safe to say you liked soobin a lot.
after meeting up with him after the event you treated him to some food of your budget but something good at least, so you did settle for some nice food in a restaurant but not something as exquisite as the one he took you to a while ago.
“well done for today, you did so well! it’s like when i was watching you i felt so alive, like so pumped up. i don’t know how to explain it.” you said enthusiastically and soobin only pinched lightly onto your cheek.
“you’re so cute~”
“i did pray a lot before this so i guess it came handy.” he said.
“you also worked really hard.” you reminded him.
“you’re so sweet.” he cooed and you only rolled your eyes, despite your frantic heart beats that were yearning to leap out of your chest.
10 - ONLY JUST THE BEGINNING
it was soon to be the most wonderful time of the year. many of the boarders had decided to return home for the christmas holidays to spend time with their families. although you weren’t looking forward to going back to your hometown and departing from soobin, you really should see your family.
however, you decided to spend your christmas eve with soobin. with taking you to the same riverside on that night of the party and he was indeed right about how the place looked at christmas time. it was only evening time but the lights were much more colourful and chromatic and there was a tall and brightly decorated christmas tree in the centre of the walkway. it was busier due to the festive time.
you had a warm insulated cup of hot chocolate your hand, and you bought it from one of the kiosks by the open walkway.
there was even a cheerful choir singing traditional christmas and festive hymns and much more modern christmas songs as well. as you continued to walk down through the avenue beside soobin, the distinct smell of fresh cinnamon and apple lingered though the air.
your hands were entwined with his as you both walked to the same place from that night, it was totally a reminiscent. the weather was cold for sure, so you had made sure to wear your woolly hat and a big coat tonight. soobin had worn his own warm coat with a tartan scarf around his neck.
“you know you never gave me back that denim jacket of mine.” he stated whilst smiling warmly, his cute dimples showing once again.
“well it’s kind of my jacket now, plus i’m taking it with me back to my hometown for the holidays.” you said sticking out your tongue. you wanted to be with him no matter what, even if it meant taking a belonging of his, you just wanted to be reminded of him whilst you were away for the holidays.
“so, when are you leaving?” he asked disheartened.
“i’m leaving… tonight.” you confirmed and he stopped in his footsteps. soobin couldn’t even explain how those words hurt him so much. just the thought of parting from you for more than a day made his heart ache.
“how about you?” you asked.
“spending it with my sister here. my parents want to come here though, so we’ll see about that.”
you had already packed most of your bags yesterday night, and you did really feel sad. it felt like you were leaving behind all the good and bad memories for this term, although you knew you were coming back right after this.
but you also felt like you were leaving behind soobin.
“so what do you want for christmas?” soobin asked after taking a sip from his own hot chocolate.
“to be happy, for real… and also some new trainers probably.” you giggled.
“happy? what do you mean by that?” he asked curiously.
“you know… just being happy. i want to be content with life. it just feels like there’s so much i haven’t done. i have so much to fulfil and there’s only just a matter of time.” you sighed.
“don’t worry we still have a long life ahead of us, we’ll definitely make the most of it in the meantime.” he stated and you completely agreed with him.
“so what do you want for christmas?” you asked him.
“to be with you.”
“i want to be happy as well and i am always at my happiest when i’m with you.” he stated.
“i like you a lot y/n. and i feel like a fool for not telling you sooner.”
as soon as those words left his mouth you felt your heart doing somersaults within your chest. your whole body shivered and began to break into a cold sweat. you felt every strained and taut muscle in your body loosen and your face inevitably grew absolutely hot. this was the effect he had on you. you stepped on your tiptoes to give him a kiss on the cheeks with a smiley face, but he neared your lips to connect with his.
“i also like you a lot soobin and i too feel like a fool for not telling you soon either.”
“but i’m not going anywhere, i’ll be back before you know it.”
“that’s what i like to hear… gosh i’m going to miss you so much.” he sighed whilst looking at the river ahead of him then solemnly at his hot drink.
“me too.” you frowned hugging his waist and he circled his arms around your torso.
“the first time i noticed you was in church, on a sunday, by the way. not in pshe class. just thought i’d say that.” you spoke and looked up to him, his face contorted in some kind of amusement.
“i looked good i bet. i always look good for church.”
“yeah you do, i have to admit.” you confirmed and he stuck his tongue out at you.
“so this is only just the beginning right?” he asked you.
“indeed it is.” you said raising your cup of hot chocolate to clink with his. nothing felt better than this. after sipping on the last of your hot drinks you two connected yet again for a final kiss.
it felt like a true lovers’ parting kiss when kissing so gently by the calming riverside. however, it certainly wasn’t one for parting or saying final goodbyes, because you knew you would be coming back here very soon.
you knew you would return here to see him and you knew he would be waiting for you right here.
this kiss was really a true lovers’ sign of affection to an open door leading to a path for flourishing together.
and with that, you two would step through that door simultaneously and take on that path together.
─ cocky asf. he would be like beomgyu, saying stuff like "you cant resist not kissing me for one second" but he still loves when you randomly show affection :( you'll definitely have him flustered even if he doesn't express it . he often shows skinship so it comforts him in a way when your affectionate . "can i get another one" and then he'll ask for a hundred more . expect him to have a big fat smile on his face for the rest of the day .
─ he'd simply just stop . he doesn't show any emotion for a hot millisecond then he'll smile so big it physically hurts . he gets sososo shy and just giggles even after the matter . probably goes for another kiss and just smiles into it 3 he will spend the rest of the day slipping a bunch of hugs and kisses throughout activities . stop hes so cute im gonna cry :')
─ yeonjun 2.0 . if you kiss him randomly, he'll more than likely make fun of you . but its only to show how much he actually loves it . this man will blush, giggle, all of the above . he probably will just bring you into a hug and stay there (so you dont see his burning face) . actually he's glad you initiated it because he would never blatantly ask . he will cling onto you for the rest of the day labeling it as "making sure you don't get lonely"
─ he would go 😐 . then he would just smile like so cute . he would be so flustered help him . would probably hold your hand and place soft kisses on it :( . like beomgyu, hes glad you made the first move cause he's too scared to maybe cross a boundary, like he isn't sure if you would feel comfortable if he kissed you but little by little he'll get there . he strikes me as the person to do a bunch of romantic activities to show his love, so he'll ask you "do you wanna bake something later" or "do you wanna watch the stars tonight", say yes pls 🙏
𖦹 huening kai
─ for some reason, he's shocked. like is my girlfriend kissing me 😱😱 . this boy would not know what to do . he would be dark red and giggling so much . he'll be really affectionate after though . he also seems like the type that usually shows skinship so its odd for him to see you doing it . if it happens while you guys are watching a movie or something, be ready to get hugged up on and smothered in smooches.
Day sixteen of kinktober - Choi Soobin x Fingering
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The movie playing on the television in Soobin's dorm was currently filling the room with sound. One you had long forgotten about since your mind was playing games with you. The dorm was as quiet as it could get since all the members were already asleep and the fact that you hadn't had sex with Soobin in weeks was about to drive you crazy. You were horny and it was the perfect time for the two of you to get frisky with one another. Which was how you found yourself in this situation.
Soobin loved watching his long fingers move slowly in and out of you. He liked seeing them slick and shiny, coated with your juices. Watching your eyes roll back and the way you arched your back when he hit that one spot was enough to make him cum in seconds. Pleasing you this way was his favorite thing. Not only did you feel good, but it turned him on immensely, but he also did love to be a bit of a tease and have you begging for him to make you feel good.
Two of Soobin's fingers were currently buried inside of your wet core as you had your head rested against his chest. His fingers only casually thrusting into your pussy at a slow, agonizing pace as he continued to pepper you with kisses and watch the film in front of him. His long digits felt great, thrusting in and out of your pussy, but it definitely wasn't going to get you to where you needed to be.
"Bin," You murmured when his fingers hit deeper, “Give me more. Please.”
At the sound of your voice Soobin’s attention came to focus on you as a small smile made its way onto his face, he had you exactly how he had wished. His free arm wrapped itself around your waist to hold your front close to his as his digits began to move faster and small whimpers escaped your lips at the sound of your pussy being so wet for him.
He crooked his digits up in attempts to hit your g-spot and he chuckled at the way you bucked your hips up and down to create that friction you needed, “You like that baby? You like having my fingers in you?” He groaned, feeling your walls clench around his fingers, letting him know that you were close to coming.
You whimpered loudly in response and Soobin placed his thumb on your swollen nub, moving it in circles to help you reach your high. You couldn’t help at this point but to let out another loud moan, causing Soobin’s cock to twitch in his pants. He was more than ready to take you right then and there, but he wouldn’t, not yet anyway. He wanted to feel you clenching around his fingers first, wanting to watch your face contorted in pleasure from something as small as his fingers. Most importantly, he wanted you to cum on his hand and watch your juices drip down his digits before making you lick them clean.
“Shit,” You mumbled against his shirt, clenching the material in your fists as you finally reached your high and came all over his fingers.
Soobin continued to thrust his fingers to help you ride out your high before slowly removing them and staring at your juices that coated his fingers. Before he could even say anything, you already had them in your mouth, sucking them dry and Soobin couldn’t help but groan at the sight. Quickly changing positions so that you were now flush against the couch, a huge smirk plastered on his face, the two of you were more than eager to keep this going.
Pairing: Choi Soobin x Reader (ft. Lalisa Manoban)
Genre: Angst; Fluff
“Soobinnie,” her voice whined across the room. “Can we please go now? I’m meeting my friends for mani-pedis today, and I want boba first.”
Soobin gave a hesitant smile and leaned over to place a kiss on his girlfriend’s nose, to which she promptly huffed and backed away, mumbling something about ruining her highlight. “Why don’t you go without me? I really have to finish this essay for Professor Bang’s class tomorrow.”
“Because, I told my friends you’d be there,” she scoffed back. “I can’t show up alo–”
“Hey, earth to Y/N?” Lalisa rolled her eyes, following the girl’s line of sight. “Oh. Soobin and Miyoung.” Lalisa turned back to her best friend, who was oblivious to everything else other than the couple at the table on the other side of the library. She gave a soft sigh at the cloudy look in her friend’s eyes. “Stop staring at them… It’s just making you upset.”
Y/N released a heavy sigh and dropped her forehead onto the table. “Why didn’t I tell him when I had the chance, Lis?”
Lis let out a snort, “Because you’re a dummy and a coward.” Y/N lifted her head to glare at her best friend’s discouraging words. “Don’t give me that look. You’ve been friends with Choi Soobin since freshman year and in love with him just as long. If you want coddling and ‘it’s gonna be okays’, text Changbin.”
“I don’t want to be babied, I just–”
Y/N was cut off by an angry shriek followed by Soobin’s deep voice, “Miyoung!” The two girls turned to see an angry girl storming away and a red-faced boy trying to pick up and reorganize his homework.
“Huh. Well, would you look at that. Maybe that chance you wanted just opened up. Go. Now. I’m tired of your moping.” Lalisa smirked, poking at her friend’s arm.
With wide eyes, Y/N made her way across the room before bending down to help collect the strewn papers. “Hey, Bin… You okay?”
“Hm, oh, hey Y/N/N,” Soobin looked up with an embarrassed smile. He set the stack of homework and notebooks he’d picked up back on the table and rubbed the back of his neck. “Uh, yeah, I’m okay. Mi, she’s just, um… upset… with me…” Exasperation was written across his face as he settled back into his seat. Soobin shook his head to reset his thoughts and plastered a fake smile on before gesturing for her to sit with him.
Y/N grimaced, recognizing Soobin’s emotions even if he tried to hide them, but sat with him anyway.
“Do you want to talk about it?” She found herself asking after the silence between them began to feel too heavy.
He tilted his head ever so slightly, a habit she had noticed of his when he was deeply considering his words. “I just don’t know what to do…”
She nodded, “Do you want comfort or advice?”
Soobin’s gaze lifted to meet hers. He wasn’t sure how to respond. Y/N had been the first girl he ever fell for, and it was because of little things like this. She was patient and understanding. She listened, and she always took into consideration the other person’s needs. She was selfless and kind. She was everything Miyoung was not.
But he knew she didn’t feel the same way, and Miyoung liked him. Well, she liked the way he looked anyway. Sometimes he felt like she didn’t really like the real him, or even know him for that matter.
Which is what their fight had boiled down to. Miyoung never listened to Soobin. She made plans for herself and expected him to drop whatever he was doing and follow her around. He had told her that he needed to finish some last minute paper edits, but she didn’t listen, or maybe she just didn’t care. He couldn’t really tell anymore. Sometimes Miyoung could be so sweet and cuddly that he forgot how cold she could be, and that’s what he was struggling with, especially now that the girl who really owned his heart was right in front of him.
Y/N waited quietly, with that lovely, gentle smile, while Soobin decided what it was that he needed. He rubbed the back of his neck again and ducked his head down in embarrassment. “Could you just… sit with me? I’ve been editing this paper for a while, and I’m almost done. I’ve just got to get my notes back in order after… earlier, and I really just want some company while I finish.”
“Of course, Bin.”
So they sat. Y/N retrieved her own study materials from her prior table, while Soobin reorganized his notes. While she studied for her midterms, he finished up his paper. They worked quietly, stealing glances when the other wasn’t paying attention. Once he had finished up, they packed their belongings but neither made a move to leave.
“Is your offer from earlier still on the table?” Soobin finally asked.
Y/N’s eyebrows rose, “To talk about it?” He nodded. “Yeah, Bin. Always. What’s on your mind?”
“She’s pretty… Miyoung I mean… and sometimes she can be sweet and really cute. She gets along with my parents too. They like her. They say she looks like a good girlfriend.”
“But?” Y/N asked, head tilted and eyes wide in a way that made Soobin want to kiss her nose.
“But… I don’t love her. I’m not even sure if I like her or not. I want to. I feel like I should… We’ve been dating for a year. But, I feel like she doesn’t know me. She just knows that I also look like a good boyfriend. I just don’t think we’re a good fit for each other.”
“Comfort or advice, Bin?”
There was that consideration she always had. Soobin smiled again, his dimples making an appearance for the first time that day—although, they always seemed to when he was around Y/N. “Advice please.”
Y/N swallowed. She wanted to be selfish and tell him to just be with her, but he was still her friend first and foremost, and he wanted real advice. “If you don’t love her—don’t even like her—then you should break up with her. You’re not doing anyone any favors by staying with someone if you don’t like each other. But, you should really think about it. You guys just argued so let emotions calm down. Maybe if you talk to her first, you’ll be able to work it out. Y–”
“We won’t.” He interrupted quickly. “We won’t work it out. I’ve tried to talk to her before. She just gets angry again or spins it around, and I always end up apologizing and doing whatever it is that she wants.”
“Why are you with her, Soobin?” Y/N finally asked, genuine confusion blatant across her face.
“I– I, um…” Soobin looked down at his closed books in shame; his voice dropping to an almost whisper. “I didn’t want to be alone. I fell for this girl, but I knew she wouldn’t feel the same way. It was hard to see her and not be with her. Miyoung approached me, and I thought maybe, at least with time, I could move on and like Miyoung. But I haven’t. I still have such strong feelings for... this other girl.”
“Bin, you have to break up with Miyoung. This isn’t fair to anyone involved. Not Miyoung, not you, and not that other girl. You need to let Miyoung, and yourself, find someone that is a better match. And, it isn’t fair to just assume that the other girl wouldn’t like you too. You’re amazing, Soobin. You’re a catch, and you deserve the world.”
Soobin nodded along, but his focus was drifting. Halfway through her spiel, Y/N had placed her hand on his to comfort him. He got the gist: ‘break up with Miyoung.’ But other than that, his focus was on how perfect her warm hand felt on his. He finally looked up to meet her compassionate gaze. “Okay, Y/N. I’ll talk to Miyoung… And then, I’ll confess to the girl I love.”