“Okay but just promise me one thing,” I say as my eyes glisten with tears. “You won’t give me the ‘you deserve better’ ending. You’ll just be upfront, tell me you want to explore, you want to see new people and this is over. The whole truth in its most vulnerable form.” I wipe away my tears as you give me one of those smiles. You look at me sincerely and sigh at last, “I think it’s very unlikely. I mean, I kinda thought you had faith in us to last.”
I giggle, “I sure hope we do. I’m just saying, if we ever decide to stop doing what we’re doing now, I want you to let go at once and not remind me of how many fishes are there in the sea. But, I don’t believe in deserving someone better. I’m so busy holding onto what I have now, I’ve absolutely no time to desire for something more. What we have is what I want. I don’t want to entertain the thought of moving on, I want it to happen when it does and just go with the flow. You are everything I was looking for, I know it. So please don’t ask me to look for someone else, all you can do is stop looking at me.”
He hugs me, his grip just gets tighter than the preceding moment. His mind seems to be running a marathon, he looks tensed and his muscles tighten up. “Fuck, Ria.” That’s my cue to smile. I return the hug with the same intensity, my tears slowly rolling down on his shirt. It doesn’t matter if we end up together or not, this right here is what matters. After all, we both are looking for each other and it’s hard to look away when you finally find what you were looking for.
- hey you, I’m looking for you, r.a.