#submission Tumblr posts

  • image

    Thanks for sharing this one @thrilla6! Can’t wait for more!

    View Full
  • Cat: What does take out means?

    Lister: Food!

    Kryten: Date

    Rimmer: Murder…

    All look at him

    *Rimmer getting flashbacks*

    View Full
  • “I’m not coming her again” good, dont come back. in fact, fuck right off because i dont come here to deal with rude and entitled people

    View Full
  • “Most students from here become, if nothing else, smokers. Or they become nonbinary.”

    #Honestly that sounds great #actual things heard in my school #teenagers are weird #teenagers#high school #high school quotes #gen z #gen z experience #gen z overheard #gen z problems #gen z quotes #gen z stuff #gen zed #gen z shit #submission
    View Full
  • Xipe Totec: If you bite it and you die, it’s poisonous. If it bites you and you die, it’s venomous.

    Quetzalcoatl: What if it bites me and it dies?

    Xipe Totec: Then you’re poisonous. Learn to listen, Quetzal.

    Huitzilopochtli: What if it bites itself and I die?

    Xipe Totec: That’s voodoo.

    Tlaloc: What if it bites me and someone else die?

    Xipe Totec: That’s correlation, not causation.

    Chicomecoatl: …what if we bite each other and neither of us die?

    Tezcatlipoca, winking: That’s kinky.

    Xipe Totec: Oh my us.

    View Full
  • Our dm: It was The Origin who write the prophecy-

    Our tiefling rogue: FUCK THE SIMS CREATORS MAN!

    View Full
  • If you anger any of the gods, they kill you in a creative way.

    You anger Dionysus, he will get your friends and family to dance a jig on your flayed but still living body because you quote,“ threw off the emperors groove.”

    View Full
  • Sandringham Anon

    SANDRINGHAM ANON 🍁🍁🌳🌳👑👑 … “ that was a close thing Sydney “ …yes sir,Herself towing us back to the residence is fortuitous “ … “ as long as I’m in the driving seat Sir “… “ I have a feeling Herself didn’t swallow that story Sydney “ … “ when we get back Sydney stay close and I won’t be questioned” “ like glue sir “ THAT EVENING “ well it worked Sydney, back in our quarters with refreshments” …” I’m afraid Herself has gone down to security to view the days CCTV sir” … “ bloody bugger”

    Thank you😊❤️❤️❤️❤️

    Monday October 19/20

    🍁🍁🌳🌳👑👑THANK YOU DEAR SANDRINGHAM ANON  🍁🍁🌳🌳👑👑

    OCTOBER 20/2020!!! AWESOME DATE!!

    VIGNETTE #17

    Oh, filled with frustration, annoyance and also yet again nonplussed, 😏😒😩🤣🤣, Herself went back to her Lone Ranger, 🚗 opened up the boot and got out some chains ⛓⛓⛓⛓⛓⛓⛓all the while thinking🤔🤔🤔 to Herself. Oh I shall have  to do some serious castigation this evening!! 😤😤😤😠😠😠Oh the boys, those boys, yes speaking of her 99 year old husband and age of Sydney unknown🤣🤣🤣😂😂😂,are forever getting into trouble!! It must be Sydney leading Himself into these shenanigans right??🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣😂😂😂😂 oh she knows exactly who’s leading who into trouble and it is not Sydney doing the leading!🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣😁😁😁😁😁😁😁Oh one would think 🤔 💭 by now the troublemaking boy genes 🧬 would have simmered out!! As she is opens the boot aka back or trunk to translate, of the Lone Ranger picking up the chains ⛓⛓⛓⛓⛓ she is just shaking her head and thinking 💭 🤔 oh boys 🧬 will be boys 🧬 will be boys 🧬 will be boys 🧬 will be boys 🧬 will be boys 🧬 forever!! Age is irrelevant!!🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣😂😂😂😂 No matter how old they get! Aaahhhh, she lets out a big sigh, and another big sigh and she closes the boot,  and heads back to the Discovery 🚙. The boys are now out of the Discovery and are helping her with the chain ⛓⛓⛓⛓. She goes back to the Lone Ranger. Kids every time I read Lone Ranger, 🚗 , l get a memory/ mental picture of the actual,actor/tv character Lone Ranger on his 🐎 horse 🐴 with his mask on 😷 ( only emoji mask l have) with his sidekick, Tonto  by his side on his horse🐴!! Sort of like these two gents, but not really!🤣🤣🤣😂😂One pair solved trouble, and one pair regularly gets into trouble!!🤣🤣🤣🤣😂😂😂l shall let you choose which pair does what.😜😜😜I also hear high ho Silver! 🐴 🐎 Away!! Silver was his horse 🐴.l hear the theme song 🎶 🎼 of the TV show  through my head every single time!!! Do you kids remember that?Anyhow back to our adventure now!😁😁😁 Herself backs up the Discovery 🚙 so it is close enough that the chains will link together, as the Discovery, 🚙 still in the ditch, it is now can be chained to her Lone Ranger, 🚗 TO THE  RESCUE! HIGH HO AWAY!😄🤣🤣🤣😂😂😂😂All right now, going go back to the Lone Ranger , you boys get back into the Discovery car and One 👑 shall pull you out of the ditch! Every word of that last sentence was spoken with staccato like force!! 😠😠😠😠😤😤😤😤Herself, referring to Herself as formal One in regular conversation, Sydney is worried, 😳😳however as usual, Himself in unfazed!!😐😐 Sydney is now in the driver seat 💺 and Himself is in the passenger seat 💺 and both are safely buckled up in the Discovery. 🚙 Himself, pleased about this 🤔 thinking 💭,everything is hunky dorey, speaks first.Sydney has remained completely silent  throughout this entire episode with Her Majesty, the Queen. Himself let’s out a big sigh saying, that was a close thing Sydney !! Sydney, now out of the ditch, and being towed by Herself in the Lone Ranger 🚗, replies yes Sir. Herself towing us back to the residence is fortuitous !! Just saying it with great force, as if saying it would make it so!! 😄😄😆😆Sydney says, as long as I’m in the driving seat💺 Sir!! Himself is starting to have reality hit a little bit now that the off-road ing adventure is over because it got a little more ‘ off road’ than planned🤣🤣🤣😂😂😂😂and the Discovery 🚙 is out of the ditch!  Being towed by  Herself, Himself is thinking 💭 🤔 more and more on their way home!! Oh more thoughts 💭 lead to doubt 🧐🧐🧐🤨🤨🤨🤨,and he says to Sydney, I have a feeling Herself didn’t swallow that story Sydney!! Ya think so Sir, 💜💜💜💜PG yells from the back seat!💺💜💜💜💜💜😂😂😂😂😂🤣🤣🤣🤣Himself continues saying, when we get back Sydney, stay close and I won’t be questioned!!! Oh yes like that plan is going to work! 🙄🙄🙄🙄🙄😜😜😜😜😝😝😝😝😝 The ever loyal dutiful Sydney replies, like glue Sir!! Finally they reach home and park the vehicles 🚙 🚗. Herself gets out of the Lone Ranger 🚗 and starts to undo the chains ⛓⛓⛓. Both gents jump out of the Discovery 🚙 and say oh no no no no, that will do,this will do, Sausage you just go inside,warm up 🔥 ☕️ have a hot cuppa ☕️ relax. Oh Himself again using one of his pet names for her, his suggestions go down like a load of bricks!😤😠😡🤣🤣🤣😂😂😂😂As if! As if relaxation is the only thing she has on her mind right now!!! Herself  stops what she’s doing with the chains ⛓⛓⛓⛓ for a minute,  without a word, looks Himself straight in the 👁 👁 eyes and then she turns, 👀 looking at Sydney and she looks👀 him straight in the eye 👁 👁!!! They both know the jig is up , their respective gooses are cooked 🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣😂😂😂😂😁😁😁😁! Herself continues what she is doing with the chains ⛓⛓⛓⛓ wraps them and puts them back in the boot of the Lone Ranger! 🚗 Without any spoken word, Herself goes inside. Oh now with the Lone Ranger 🚙 parked and them safely home, the two gents start to speak. Finally speaking, Himself says, nothing worse than stoney silence and icy 🥶 glares 🧐🤔🤔🥶🥶eh Sydney? Sydney says oh my my my my my my my! Himself says castigation, castigation lies ahead!! Sir!, yes Sir, is the only reply Sydney can muster. Sydney is thinking, castigation for Himself but what lies ahead for me? What about my salary raise?🥺🥺🥺🥺😨😨😨$$$$€€€€£££££😵😵😵😵😮😮😮😮😮😲😲😲😲😲Oh they both are now left with their own thoughts and their own worries. Once inside after a hot cuppa, ☕️, and Himself has a refreshment or two, 🥃 🍺 🍻  🥃 it is time to refresh, change my clothes.Sydney, now changed, refreshed and appropriately attired, says Sir,l have fresh clothes ready for you and l shall assist as usual where needed. Himself replies, thank you Sydney, you’re a real chum. THAT EVENING after a very long and quiet evening meal 🥘 🍷 with Herself, not one thing said about the days events! EPIC I AM FREE !! are his thoughts that are 💭 racing, pardon the pun, he was not technically racing the Discovery 🚗, it was adventurous off-roaring  that went too ‘off-road’😂😂😂😂😂🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣Himself is now very optimistic that there will be no castigation. Tut, tut , tut, Sir, one should know better after all these years🤣😂😂😂🤣🤣🤣😂😂😂!  Himself 💭 thinks 🤔 he is off the hook as they say! Sydney is on his own in this one.🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣😜😜😜😜😜 Sydney, checking on Himself, to ensure that he has adequate refreshments 🥃🍺🍻🥃as usual. Letting out a BIG sigh, tapping his tummy with both fire fingers and middle fingers, as He does, 😂😂😂😂😂🤣🤣🤣🤣, says, well it worked Sydney, back in our quarters with refreshments 🥃🍺🍻🍺🍻🥃😁😁😁😁😁😁Chuffed and proud and overly pleased with his day of adventures😁😁😁😁and completely relaxed. Sydney shatters that delusion completely, bringing back reality 😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😝😝😝😝😝😝🤪🤪🤪🤪🤪saying, I’m afraid Herself has gone down to security to view the days CCTV Sir!!! THE JIG IS UP, OVER, CAPUT, DISASTER AWAITS🤣🤣🤣😂😂😂Himself’s day, evening AND now night, and quite possibly more days……ruined!!! Loud bellowing 🔔 as he yells, bloody bugger!!! I hate that bloody CCTV, FACEAGRAM, INSTABOOK, TWOOGLE, GOOGLITTER, ALL SOCIAL MEDIA. Oh bless you Sir, you got the names of them almost right!! You did better than I could because I’m not on social media,Sir!! One can’t go anywhere or do anything without some interference destroying shattering ones fun!!! ON ONES OWN PROPERTY EVEN!!!🤯🤯🤯🤬🤬🤬🤬🤬🤬😮😮🤬🤬🤬🤬🤬🤬Oh bloody hell Sydney, castigation in its most dangerous form awaits me. My fate is sealed. Himself speaking as if this were a Shakespearean tragedy unfolding 😫😫😫😂😂😂😂😂🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣. Sydney, thinking of his own fate that awaits, uses his standby, indubitably Sir!…….TO BE CONTINUED……..

    DONE WITH THE GREATEST LOVE AND RESPECT FOR HER MAJESTY THE QUEEN AND HIS ROYAL HIGHNESS PRINCE PHILIP THE DUKE OF EDINBURGH 💜💜🙏🏻🙏🏻PG💜💜

    GSTQAOBC  🇨🇦 🇬🇧 🇦🇺 🇳🇿 

    Entertainment Purposes

    Thank you PG.  so entertaining!  Great stuff!😊💜💜💜💜💜💜

    View Full
  • Oooh, there you are! I was wondering where you went

    image

    ah

    well

    it’s a long story

    #no. 7 here #submission
    View Full
  • [You’re dumb]

    View Full
  • They Might Be Half-Giants.

    #tmbg #they might be giants #submission
    View Full
  • image

    Originally posted by anvilgurl

    “Woah!” Julian startles, placing a hand over his heart. “Did your master put you in this pot to give me a fright, Faust?”

    Sure did! Squeeze?

    “I can’t understand you, you know,” he groans, taking a step forward reluctantly to take the teapot in hand. “Let’s get you back to Asra, alright?”

    View Full
  • image

    Should i click save @1-800-wholesome

    hmmm, knowing you,, you already clicked it, but yes. do it

    #mai and her big brain #no 1 lev simp #levs babydoll 🦗🦟✨ #submission
    View Full
  • i dont have any planets in my 1st house, what does that mean for me?

    Your primary life path follows the nature of the traits of the sign ascending.

    View Full
  • I grew up a conservative Evangelical. I also grew up discretely loving Harry Potter and shyly aware of the fact I’m bisexual. As a kid I witnessed Harry Potter books being burned and gay people being called perverts. When I was finally able to break away from church culture, I dove right into libfem culture. I thought just about ANYTHING Evangelicals disapproved of must be good, especially the LGBT movement. 

    Unfortunately, like so many millennials, a lot of my education about feminism and the LGBT community was through tumblr. I started questioning my gender identity eventually, even quietly coming out to a few people as a “demigirl”  — a label I tossed aside after some deep thought. Was it not just a pretentious way of saying tomboy?

    I thought perhaps I might be “agender” after that, because I didn’t understand what on earth people meant when they said they “felt” like a woman. None of my normie liberal non-tumblr female friends seemed to even think about this. Only transwomen on the internet seemed concerned with “feeling” like women, which always somehow translated into activities that I myself hated, like getting manicures, wearing dresses, or applying excessive makeup. Was this all actually based on stereotypes? Seeds of doubt started to grow in my mind the same way they did when I started questioning the Bible in my adolescence. 

    A huge turning point for me was witnessing an exchange in the comments section of ONTD, of all fucking places. One user spouted off the phrase “hearts not parts” to explain the superiority of pansexuality and trans ideology, to which an older gay guy took offense. He said that it sounded just like the conservative Christians who tried to fix his sexual orientation: being gay is perversion, a genital fetish, and he needed to learn to be attracted to the female form. 

    It finally clicked how similar the rhetoric was. Not just the rhetoric, but the response to disagreeing with the rhetoric. People were being cancelled right and left for not affirming certain tenets of the trans “faith” in the same way Christan authors like Rob Bell were excommunicated for not believing in a literal hell.  

    All of this to say: my peak trans moment was seeing people burning Harry Potter books again. It felt all too familiar. Once again, J.K. Rowling was ~ leading the children astray ~ and we needed to shun the unbeliever (without even reading what she wrote, of course). 

    It became so clear that modern transgenderism is a religion of its own. And just like with any religion, there are peaceful adherents who just want to live their lives—and there are fundamentalists who shout a lot, aggressively try to convert people, deny science, and expect everyone else in the world to cater to and validate their faith-based beliefs. We used to argue in biology classes about creationism. Now I assume zealous 9th graders are standing up to their teachers to proclaim the Good News of Jesus Christ that biological sex is not real. And the rest of the class will likely say Amen—because they know what will happen amongst their peers if they don’t.

    I don't begrudge anyone their faith, so long as it doesn’t harm others. I wouldn’t want a Jehovah’s Witness to be fired or kept from renting an apartment just because they’re a Jehovah’s Witness. No follower of Islam or Buddhism or Catholicism should face violence or discrimination for their religious beliefs, no matter how objectively unprovable.

    I do not believe that Jesus is the literal Son of God anymore, but that doesn’t mean I hate Christians. I do not believe that transwomen are women anymore, but that doesn’t mean I want to deny their basic human rights. I just wish the fundamentalists from both groups would stop trying to infringe on mine. 

    View Full
  • Date a boy who will adopt a pet with you

    View Full
  • I don’t ship Hermione with Draco or Ron because I don’t think she should be with someone who is cruel to animals (Buckbeak and Crookshanks, respectively).

    #harrypotterconfessions#submission#ships#hermione granger#draco malfoy#ron weasley #this says i submitted this but i didn't it's a tumblr thing i guess now i dunno
    View Full
  • 51.  Present your significant other with a beautifully hand-cut, dramatic, 24-carrot ring. That is not a typo. – Dave L.

    View Full
  • View Full