Still trying to find something to cut with in this hospital
Anyone got any ideas?
Anyone got any ideas?
I despise my existence.
So guess I’ll just wake up, be sad and repeat until I fucking die huh. What the actual fuck￼
I’ve had enough
If i died tonight… What would you do?
I can’t move.
The heaviness on my back
Makes me unable to breathe.
NO NOT AGAIN
PLEASE GO AWAY
I need this to end
I want to recover for the ways I am learning to believe in myself
I haven’t drawn in ages and I only have a pen on me so it looks like shit, but this is how I feel rn🤷🏻♀️
The itchiness of the cuts healing is worse than the cuts themselves
skipped lunch and snack and currently still am sitting at 500 cals, i will eat my dinner of 250 cals later and .. well. I feel a bit bad since my recovery was going so well and then something happened.
I just want to be loved
To know someone cares
That I’m not doing ok
But anyone who knows doesn’t care
And I can’t trust anyone else to care
Everyone I have ever trust has turned their back on me
I am alone
All I’ve ever want was to die
I just don’t want to be here anymore
But I can’t even do that
Because I can’t hurt people I care about like that
I wish someone would do it for me
So pain would stop to consume
For if there is hell I am in it
It’s been at least a few weeks since my meds ran out completely, following at least a month of rationing what I had. But since I lost my health insurance when I lost my job during the summer and my new job has a 3 month waiting period before their insurance kicks in, I’m just kinda shit out of luck for a while.
I was doing ok for a bit because I’m but really starting feel the dark fog roll back in. I think we’re in for a rough time, folks
Sometimes I wonder if life is worth living through. I’ve been living so miserably and I just get tired of it. Sometimes I wonder if it’s even worth it. If my life stays like this, fuck no. But I have some hope things will change and I can finally be happy. I just need that special someone but I’m not good enough for anyone, at least I haven’t been. I want to change for the better and be happy, but I don’t have a lot energy and the will to keep going. My life feels fucked cause of me, it doesn’t feel worth living
I WANT TO DIE I CANT FUCKINF DO IT ANYMORE