My SANflower 🥰🌻🌻
Happy Birthday Jhopie~
Summer Vibes with Sunshine!
Enjoy the Summer by capturing Sunny Moments using Camera Sunglasses!
The first draw of my new sketchbook!!!
Chuu is the girl of my dreams. I love her so fucking much.
— Sam Smith - To Die For
I need to see Edrisa meet Sunshine.
sometimes i almost feel bad somehow for being so unabashedly giddy about being in love. almost.
president’s day weekend one year ago, my ex– who’d cheated on me and left me for someone else– insisted that i owed them $300 i did not owe them; even dismissing the fact that i paid rent by myself for a year and a half, even if for some reason it were valid to hand off money to someone who tore up our relationship like that, i did not in any mathematical way owe them. i spent two hours carefully writing a 700 word response to this request, because i was still in love with them and didn’t want to fight.
in response to my message, they drove to my home, and said some really, really awful things. i cried so hard i go sick and couldn’t go into work the next day. I’ll spare y'all of the all the rest of the details, but they continued to be in and out of my life for the next two and half months after that, making and breaking promises, lying, making me feel like i was not worth loving or respecting, stringing me along as a back up plan until they decided to stay with the person they cheated with.
a year ago i felt heartbreak more intensely than i ever had in my life. i remember sobbing feeling like it would break my ribs. it was such a dark and ugly and low place.
today i woke up at 7:30 without an alarm. Trey and i chatted about a couple things and he made me feel heard and loved. i got up, ate leftovers from our Valentine’s day dinner for breakfast. i unpacked and put away clothes, i cleaned the bathroom sink drain, i did dishes, i cooked and ate dinner, i packed leftovers for lunch. i put on a new outfit and met up with Trey at the bar where we’ve started doing regular trivia nights, did trivia with him and three new friends i didn’t know before last month. when songs came on that we both knew he and i danced at the table and laughed, he held me to his side, he gave me sips of cider. on the ride home he gave a very passionate speech about how bugs are rude creatures. he walked me to my door and kissed my forehead and my hand goodnight.
i deserve this; god, i deserve this. i deserve to feel my heart rest and be at ease. i deserve to be with someone who makes me feel like loving me is easy, someone who makes me feel safe, someone who makes me feel vibrant and loud. i do.
Soft boi hours
Damn I’m cute 😍❤