At first, I was a tad bit sad but eventually grew tired of it because why should I be sad about it tho?! You have to lift up yourself and grow stronger! So what happened? Where did it go wrong?
People usually say, “Communication is the Key!”, but lil did I know that, even if you communicated with each other, without comprehension, it will still go down the drain.
Don’t go saying, ‘I have explained it so many times, yet you still don’t wanna listen and it’s you that dont understand it’. HOLD IT RIGHT THERE!
Do you ever ask yourself again, in a CLEAR STATE OF MIND not clouded with any emotional or feelings as in why your partner doesnt wanna accept your reasoning? Have you ever put yourself in her/his shoes before blurting out those hurtful words?
If you needed to heal yourself whilst in a relationship, it is TOTALLY DOABLE! Remember, while your are healing/adjusting/tuning yourself, don’t forget your partner, don’t push her/him away, you can always explain it to them as in why you needed it and treat them as you always do. A normal text or a phone call wont do you any harm.
Somehow, when you’re together, you’ve become emotionally dependent on each other. Even the tiniest changes in you will questioned her/him ‘is it me? Is it my fault?’
Fret not! It’s normal. That’s why yall need to know how assurance and reassurance works.
P/S: It is never your responsibility to heal someone when they never had the intention to heal themselves!
3. ASSURANCE & REASSURANCE
Moving on to this one, which I think its kinda crucial, because this is what holds yall together despite whatever hardships that you guys went through.
If your partner is having a tiny inch of insecurities due to YOUR actions, kindly reassure them that everything’s gonna be just fine (but dont repeat the same masalah lah k) and it’s just us overthinking! KAH i know women tend to overthink haha because I do. LOL
So peeps! This might come in handy too!
Lad and Lassies, when you are in a relationship, kindly draw a CLEAR boundaries between your opposite gender friends ya. ESPECIALLY YOUR EXES! You don’t simply hangout with your ex stating that he/she is JUST A FRIEND *rolls eyes*
Its either one of these; They are still in love or they never were.
But hey! Its 2020! Of course yall have to chill to whoever the frog your partner wants to hangout with. If he/she wanted to hangout with their ex, let them, you go tag along.
Even if you wanted to hangout just the two of you, please dont make any STUPID reasoning as to why it is legit for you to do so.
‘Just Friend’ is not a ticket for you to go reminiscing your good ol’ times with them. Deep down, don’t you feel guilty to your partner? Frog this shit. This contributes to your partner having doubts and insecurities on you!
Peeps, trust is something that you should earn, not ask for. Its very stupid when YOU are the one feeding the doubts and insecurities YET you tell your partner to just TRUST you. Thats ballsy of you.
So, along the way, tolerance, give and take (this is for me lah katanya) are necessary, IF they comply all of the above. You can even tone down your ego (also directed to me 🙄) if its for ‘kebahagian sejagat’ LOL. Its the effort lah, if along the way you realized something is OFF, ask again, berbaloi ke ni?
Arguing and fighting is normal, if you wanna fight, fight harder, that’s what make both of you stronger and get to know each other more. Yes you have diff stands, but understanding and comprehension is muy importante!
If he/she keeps on doing the things that you don’t like which you’ve CLEARLY stated that you are no where near comfy about it, THINK AGAIN, is it worth it? Clearly he/she is not respecting you if he/she repeats it again! kan! Why bother? At one point, I even questioned my moves, and somehow it appears that he’s gaslighting me (sort of), so its a no no!
I’m letting go of this pain, in a way so that it will not engulf me any further. You shouldn’t questioned your worth, the minutes you question it, its a sign to get moving. So, imma put this troubled feelings in a box and throw it out, be happy and get going.
Thank You, Next!
P/S: shout out to my tremendous support system. Thank you for pulling me out! You know who you are ;) <3
A true friend is one who overlooks your failures and tolerates your successes. - Doug Larson
I have several. Thanks guys.
15 Second Thoughts
S01E02: Retaining Employees
Retaining employees isn’t difficult if you treat them with fairness and equality. Treating one employee who creates animosity and anxiety amongst the rest is not welcomed and it should not be tolerated.
#Awareness #Inspiration #Lifestyle
WE NEED TO MUCH BETTER UNDERSTAND NEUROTYPICAL COGNITION.
Human psychology is mostly neurotypical psychology but usually without in comparison with autistic, adhd and aspergers’ psychology.
All of us, including autism advocacy, autistics themselves (when and if its possible and not hurting) and even neurotypical themselves, need to know, how does neuroypical cognition work.
Its because i have seen when i disclose the aspergers self-advocacy concepts, generally following troubles appears.
1. Many neurotypicals (and probably confirmatively neurotypical) who do not have exactly the same type of trauma, but some other type of traumas, sensitivities etc; starts to complain about their invalidation and they starts sort of competition, and they misses the point that criticising them is not our purpose.
2. When attempt to explain people about specific accomodation, and how or why they committing specific mistakes; many neurotypicals (and probably confirmatively neurotypicals) starts to complain as if they are being judgemental (even if we are not). Some starts to feel guilty, some other feels offended, reacts boastfully.
3. Our inability to “telepathically” understand others’ expectation; makes them perceive as incredibly immoral and insensitive. So whenever I explain specific example of how or when I fail to fulfill telepathic expectations; it is perceived as if I am criticising basic moral and ethics.
4. Autistic self advocacy concepts “sounds” or “feels” to many neurotypicals as very personal criticism to the things the neurotypicals love or relate or think as witty or intelligent.
5. In spite many neurotypicals (probably confirmatively neurotypicals) constantly hurt us and then react like its we who were hurting them; its a fact they feel hurt. They feel hurt when their “symbolic” signal is not perceived as their symbolic meaning; such as their teasing is not perceived as loving to us, or their white lies break our trust for them as friend; they just hurt as fuck, and though they don’t care to work out the tricky part, or they are unable to work out the tricky part; they treat any explanations to be very judgemental of their sanity, and our meltdown responses perceived by them as horribly offensive. They just perceive their precious love reaction is being treated as trash. And from their perspective they feel abused, and when we explain our condition technically; they perceive as if we are blaming and criticising them for their very base nature.
6. Many non-autistics and non-ADHD; who are probably confirmatively neurotypical; often have some other undiagnosef mental illness; including narcissistic personality disorder (NPD), and yes, autistic self-advocacy is prettymuch about request for suppressing the narcissistic-type of tendencies in general public. Also autistic self advocacy is much about empowerment; so a neurotypical who like to be in power, may use the similar slogans in an opposite purpose.
7. Just like we the neurodivergent people face systematic aithoritative abuse at school etc. most neurotypical kids face similar abuse. Incidentally, schools hate many neurotypical traits too, so when they found us incredibly nerdy and we talking about of our need of ‘nerd-ness’; they often inevitably confuse us with maintainer of abuse; they unsee the fact that we are victim of same type of abuse.
So neurotypicals live in a different reality, which isnt the absolute reality (but autistic’s reality being the absolute one), they accuse us for the same thing they do with us. And from their illusive reality; they feel they are always right. And that is a super sensitive situation. And although they are illusive, we are not allowed to tell them illusive. But they are allowed to dictate us that how silly and shitty we are, how much they care or sacrifice to accept us, and how much we hurt them; though in reality its we the invisible disability people who do the sacrifice, and its the neurotypical people who hurts us. Yet the disability doesnt count as a disability, its counted as a moral violation.
Not gonna fake the funk
Iaze, before staying behind on Marr’s ship: I wish D0c was here. I never told him the truth - that he was my long-lost brother
Kira: D0c is your brother?????????
Iaze: no. I just wanted to troll that n00b one last time
tagged by @mammon-chan !! 💕
this is HARD lmao
1. i’ll start with the easy one, MAMMON (obey me)
2. satan (obey me)
3. kaminari denki (my hero academia)
4. zenitsu agatsuma (demon slayer)
5. uhhh?? lucio (the arcana)
Weed. Not to go all stoner or anything, but it does genuinely help.
So anyway, if anyone wants a radfem to block:
the sideblog is pepp-ita
the main is radfem-alex