You cant tell toxic parents a funny joke or story for shit, I swear
You cant tell toxic parents a funny joke or story for shit, I swear
I live in a very toxic family environment, and today my mother was like “Y’all so ungrateful I’m gonna stop paying for the food so you can pay for your own” and in my mind I was thinking “don’t worry, I’m trying to starve to death anyway, that will only help me reach the goal faster” lmao 🤣 (btw, this all happened because I left a spoon on the sink)
I’m the black sheep of my slightly s*itty family - the early grad from a prestigious state university with a full tuition scholarship to law school - type of black sheep
Exactly what the f*** I did to earn such a lovely title I’ll never know.
I’ve seen a lot of people say that this pandemic has made them realize how important family is. They’re saying how fueds dont matter and theyre talking to estranged family again if that’s not you that’s ok!!!! Do not feel guilty you shut them out for a reason don’t feel pressured to let them back in your lives because life is scary right now!
I pierced my ear at a parlor a while ago. Take into account my mom didn’t really want me to do it but because I was going to anyway her only concern was that I got it during winter. And because I didn’t listen to the treatment advice I have an infection for a while. I didn’t really bother me and I just thought it would go away (like my problems never do) but it got worse.
So today I was a bit worried and I went to my mom to ask for her advice. She was worried at first and then she asked me if I followed the treatment. I told her no.
She then basically told me to go fuck myself because what is she supposed to do if I didn’t follow procedure.
So now I am thinking: is this what she would tell me if I get raped? Did I wear revealing clothes? If I get run over? Did I check the street? If I get pregnant? Did I have sex?
The way she treats me is not supposed to be based on what I do but rather what problems I have.
If that hurts so much, why can’t you just leave them?
That’s definitely a question for some of you who is confused between Love, Ego, and Bond. That’s okay I used to asked the same question. In my journey through life looking for a peaceful mind, I have experienced some hurtful relationships with my beloved people and that is what we called as toxic relationship. Some of you might be wondering “what the heck is a toxic relationship?”. Guys, you may have experienced it or you are currently in that relationship now but you just don’t realize it. Well it’s not easy to see or even realize that you are in a toxic relationship.
So, I’m gonna tell you what a toxic relationship is.
A toxic relationship comes from a toxic person, obviously. Who is considered as toxic person? They might be your lover, friends, even your parents and siblings, they can be considered as toxic person. Yes, blood ties don’t guarantee that you have a good relation. In my journey until now, my toxic person (lol) are a friend and family. It is so damn hard to be close with them.
Okay I’ll start with a friend. She was one of my best friend. We hung out together, laughed together, occasionally have a sleepover together, heck we even tried some bad things together We were so happy back then. And then, I realized something that has been bothering me for a long time. If you read my last article, you’ll know how insecure I am back then. Yes, she told me that I’m ugly, it’s like it is such a bad thing to be myself. And there are load of things she said about me. And I will never forget how she killed my dream. She always try to ’shaped’ others to be have the same mindset as her especially in ‘dating department’. When we were talking about the future she always asks “When do you think we will get married?” to be honest marriage is not something I see in my future but when I told her that she got mad at me. She also has problem about how I never date anyone and that in my age, I have should have been dating someone just like her. How tired.
That was just a short story that make me feel so insecure and hurts. I was insecure of my body, my dreams, and being a woman. It’s like I failed to be a woman, a princess who always live in the romance world. I’m an adult (based on my age) who have never been in a ‘real’ relationship, and I feel so ugly, I was so fuckin insecure back then. So, what did I do at that time? I forced myself to look for a man, live in someone else’s expectation, be someone else, and pretend to be okay when I’m judged. I did all those things to be accepted and keep her as friend.
Let’s move to the 2nd story.
This story comes from my family. Well, I’ll shorten it.
My father have passed away when I was 12. I live with mother, 2 sisters, and a brother. My sisters already have a family at that time.
Me as a young girl who is still learning about the cruel world we live in, and I’ve always been judged, blamed even cursed by my own family. They always forced me to be a ‘good girl’ in the name of religion, but I don’t like it. Hmm actually, it takes 8 years to figure it out. My mom is very very grumpy. When I made one mistake, she cursed at me and make sure that everything is my fault until she felt satisfied, and me? Crying alone and make sure no one knows I was crying. My sisters and my brother, it looks to me they just don’t seem to care about me because they always agree of what my mom said, they don’t even bother to ask me if I’m okay, I felt so lonely. I’m just all alone. Someday, on a good day they ask me what it is that I want. Unfortunately, I can’t tell them well, I was so scared. Yes, I was scared of my own family, my mom who gave birth to me. I can’t talk to them, I feel so uncomfortable when I’m with them, it’s like I want to go far away. And yes, it takes me like 8-9 years to realized that.
In 2017 (if I’m not mistaken or forgot), I felt so depressed for like 2-3 months. I don’t have someone to lean on, I was just all alone. Feeling so tired, scared, empty, frustration, mad, and hurt every night, and no one knows about that. In this year, I began to avoid my friend, and you know what she thinks? she thinks that I am a problem, funny? Yep lmao. And then in 2018 when I watched a k-drama called Wise Prison Life (you can read my first article), I dare myself to move on and try to accept everything I have.
So, those are some stories of mine about toxic relationship. This view might change your mindset about toxic person. Because yes, it can come from everyone even your own family.
Hm, i think you already figure it out what the toxic person is. Based on my experience, toxic person is a person who always blaming, cursing, and judging you excessively. Basically, they do violence verbally, physically, etc., it certainly hurts you and disturbs your mental health. What are the benchmarks? It depends on yourself, that’s only you know about the limits. So guys, if you’re hurt, you are just hurt. Stop pretending to be okay.
Reconciliations? I cut off ties with my friend. I let myself to let it go. I do love her, I like her so much but she hurts me a lot, and I’m tired to be stupid. It takes courage, indeed. And you know what? Now I have many friends who are more ‘healthy’, supportive, understanding and cool. I lost a friend, then I got another one, sometimes you have to believe in the universe guys.
Then how about my family? as the time goes by, my older siblings try to understand what I’m feeling, they become quiet when my mom start to blamed me for something. And yeah, once again I dare myself to be honest to my family. it’s not just once actually, it takes 3 times to say what I want and finally they understand. I had a serious talk with my mom, just the two of us, and yeah we had a deeptalk, she’s telling me about how she feels. And evidently, she also felt what I felt too. So we finally understand of each other minds and hearts.
Ah yes, maybe this one is not a story I experienced first hand, but I’ll just remind you this.
If you have a boyfriend or girlfriend, and he/she’d love to cursed, blamed, or even hit you with his/her hands/things or hit you by his/her speech, and it hurts you, leave him/her. It’s not Love anymore, it’s just your ego and fears to be single. You deserve something better guys.
My conclusion is if only that toxic person could be invited to solve problems, why not for peace? But you also have to be able to see the situation and condition of the toxic person. Can they be invited to make peace or not, make sure of that. Because there is some people who still can’t accept themselves yet.
Let’s just live in peaceful mind, enjoy some little things, and try to be happy all the time. ❤️
editor: @yashintap (ig)
come take my hand, let me gently caress it with mine
do not worry because i believe you,
you are not crazy.
you were given no space to be a child but here take my childhood,
take the lust i had for joy and not other bodies.
i saw beauty in cuts, bruises and broken limbs
because i was usually the culprit of my own pain
which explains the guilt and the shame you bear
with the same cuts, bruises and broken limbs
but here let me take that too,
for i know you would prosper without it
i know it’s an anchor in more ways than one
but have no fear because i’m strong enough now to take it for you
children should not have to carry such weight that even adults have trouble lifting
I got this idea shortly after I finished the mermaid fic. It’s basically Little Red Riding Hood. You can imagine who Red is and I’m sure you can guess who the wolf is. :P
All characters except Paisley Bleakmore belong to Pixelberry.
Warnings: There is smut in this, lots and lots of angst. The first chapter starts with attempted rape. Toxic family values. Drake angst, yes he gets his own, he has a special kind of angst. Liam and Leo are evil in this. Physical violence. It’s got that dark fairytale feel. If any of this is triggering please don’t read this series.
This is not written for readers under 18 and by reading the following you are agreeing that you are over 18 and okay with the above warnings.
What happens when Mr. Bleakmore refuses to give his blessing on Drake and Paisley’s wedding.
Warnings: toxic family relationships, strict religious beliefs, NSFW, angst.
No one under 18, please.
1 - Engaged
2 - Single
3 - It’s Complicated
4 - Married
Idk how anyone could come from a family like mine & not be damaged.
So much yelling, cursing, lying, fighting, negativity, self doubt, bashing, poverty, judgments, mental, emotional, and physical abuse…. how could someone live through that toxic homestead and not be damaged?
I don’t think it’s possible. Just. Not. Possible. People don’t live through a situation like that & walk away unscathed.
let me tell y'all something: I adore watching the interactions my mother has with my therapist. you know, my mum, the person who emotionally, physically and psychologically abused me my whole life, who used to spank me till my legs bled, who called me a coward for cutting myself and attempting suicide, who joked to her friends about my eating disorder, who calls me psychotic and crazy every time I bring up one of the many instances she humiliated me for her own pleasure, who mocked my sexual assault and blamed it on “the heat of the moment”, that woman now gets on video calls with my therapist about how I’M crazy, how I’M angry and loud and verbally abusive, how I treat her poorly, how I’M killing myself because all I gotta do to cure my anorexia is eat and I can’t even do that, how I’M insane because of the way I dress. That woman, who still puts me through so much shit and refuses to apologise and own up to all the things she did (and allowed others to do) to me, now plays the victim to MY therapist and makes her think I’m some kind of disrespectful monster who doesn’t know anything about life. isn’t that fucking hilarious??????
thinking about how all the bullying and abuse i faced as a child till my teens culminated in me convincing myself i will never be worthy of love or happiness and how i have no way to undo all the things other ppl put me through and they will never apologise to me :) :)
just had a fight with my mom and she said straight to my face that i should die
we love ‘‘the best mom in the whole wide world’’ ♡♡♡♡
My mum text me today (via her boyfriend), the first time I’ve heard from her in years. I refuse to let her in and hurt me again, she’s the most toxic, manipulative and abusive human being ever.
It’s okay to not forgive people that have hurt you, even if there’s a global crisis ✌️
You know what’s a good fucking feeling? When you tell someone you hate a family member and they validate you instead of telling you “bUT tHEyRe fAMiLy” and trying to make you feel like you’re the asshole. Shout out to those people, we need more like them.
Me: Why dont you stand up for me against my bully of a sister?
My family: Oh you see we would, but then she’d bully us too so instead of all 9 of us standing up against 1 of her, and calling her out, we’re just gonna let her bully you so she leaves the rest of us alone 😀
And they wonder why I want to kill myself
As much as I love a good fanfic
Hating on other girls
Also oof not all of your audience is going to have black hair?? Like. Reading this shit makes ME feel bad because my ass is BLONDE.