Ne kadar çok konuşursan konuş, ne kadar açıklarsan açıkla. Ne kadar bağırırsan bağır. Asıl izah sustuklarındadır.

“Yıldızları ve göklerdeki sonsuzluğu farkedin. O zaman hayat neredeyse büyülü gözüküyor;

| Vincent van Gogh

Inalcanzable como una estrella tan brillante...

Si impara a volare durante le difficoltà.

Si impara a volare guardando fisso il cielo in tempesta.

(Gitano)

Part III

I have always loved my space, my corner so when people try to go there with me - i get a little mean. I didn’t want people to know of my world. I shut people out - kindly of course, sometimes) i built my walls so high even the titans can’t get in or do a peek-a-boo. I hurt people because i dont wanna hurt because getting hurt for me feels like my heart being plucked piece by piece. And no one knows because nobody can read minds... If only.

Although i never admitted it. Because fuck it, who fucking wants to be vulnerable, to feel vulnerable. Not me. Obviously.

But nobody knew of my struggles, you see, a smile would always suffice. When you’re feeling a little bit of everything, just smile, nobody will question it. It was my only weapon to hide anything, everything. It doesn’t fix shit on the inside but it bloody works on the outside.

They say everything is a fleeting feeling yet why for 20 years is my pain still here. Burried inside my chest. I wonder when im finally gonna be free from it all, free from feeling worthless, free from my ugly thoughts, free from hate, when can i calm my tired mind without worrying that my little darkness might pop up and say hello to the world. Sometimes i wonder if i ever go all out bat shit crazy because all the emotions are just piling up that there’s no more space to contain it all. When I’m exhausted probably, when i can no longer use my head to lead my heart. When i can no longer feel. When im numb. That’s when I’ll probably go. Batshit. Crazy.

My tired, tired heart. How cruel are you to your own. A tragedy written on my chest.

Yaralı adamları severken üç şeyi hesaba katın.

Kolay iyileşmezler.

Hemen kabullenmezler.

Bir gün çekip giderler.

I tell myself I don’t need anyone, the truth is nobody really needs me...

Let’s see if this gets through...

Gelemiyor musun bana ?

Söktürdüm tüm kilitlerimi yokluğunda.

Kapılarım özgürlük kadar açık.

İçerisi girecek herhangi birine cehennemken , sana orada buz gibi nehirler biriktiriyorum.

Fáj?

Annyira fáj, hogy mozdulni nem tudsz a fájdalomtól?

Annyira, hogy legszívesebben meghalnál?

Tudom milyen ez...

Adj időt magadnak! Lehet az pár óra, napok, hetek vagy akár hónapok. Nem számít!

Tudom, hogy azt érzed, sosem lesz vége, hogy eleged van, nem bírod tovább....

Sírd ki magad! Sírj ameddig kell,amíg már egy könnycsepped sem marad, ne szégyelld!

Hidd el jobb lesz! A fájdalom megmarad, nem fog eltűnni, a részeddé válik, de fel fogsz állni a földről. Sokkal könnyebb lesz, ha nem fojtod magadban!

lol

Still trying something out.

Part 1

What makes you tick?

Attention seekers

Pretentious peeps

Almost everyone really. Everyone agitates me. My hate can put me through and to hell with my ugly thoughts.

I suffer yet nobody notices, nobody knows and that makes me sad, mad, tick.

My heart is bloody bruised, badly - if i may add. My mind is so screwed, literally- there’s a continuous drilling going on in there that one day might probably explode. It’s a ticking bomb - my mind, body and soul. It’s excruciating and yet all I can think about is that - I’m being petty - it’s nothing compared to other people’s problems. I’m over reacting. Don’t tell no one, they might think you’re crazy, pathetic and so self absorbed. You don’t wanna disturb anyone with your ugly thoughts. You already hate yourself, why would u want other people to hate u too. You’re a selfish brat, not given the benefit of the doubt even when you’re trying your best to be your best because u don’t deserve it. There you go. — Ugly thoughts.

How to bl*ck *ds from your d*sh

You are bad, you are cruel, you play with everyone and you fool them.

But you have something that I don't know about and it's driving me nuts always questioning myself ¿why?.

Why I'm attracted to you, when I know you're cold like the snow?

Why I want you to notice me, when I know that you will always be blinded by your own ego?

Why I have this feeling that you're not like everyone says?

And why I want to know who you really are, when I perfectly know that there's nothing more inside?

~ devilish crush~

I love how some tumblr blog themes just completely ignore standard software design conventions, particularly using weird cursors, like links will show the (?) cursor or highlightable text won't show the I-bar cursor. It keeps me on my toes. It reminds me of the brief time I spent on the internet before people had 'well-designed' websites.

Still don't understand why Tumblr Desktop displays the top 8 trending subjects, and Tumblr Mobile displays the top 9.

Today’s aesthetic: informational posts about how to recover viable seeds from store-bought produce being snarkily dismissed as “wow, man discovers gardening!” by folks who don’t know how to properly water a potted plant.

I’d almost expect weird things to happen to this blog cause it’s so old(2012ish), but my art one too? Which has only been up two years? Maybe it’s only affected too cause it’s a sideblog to this one

Birlikte gülüp eğleneceğim üzüleceğim her duyguyu birlikte yaşayacağım biri olsun istiyorum ama hayat nah yapıyo hep..😑